How to get an ex back after two years

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Before I begin the thankless, never-not-mortifying task of discussing late night texting etiquette, I must first declare this a shame-free space.
I will say, however, that I get a sick pleasure out of being on the receiving end of texts of the "u uppP?"-ilk. After the recovering from the initial flattery of him having want to "sex me up," I experienced mortification.
There are apps you can buy that make you solve complex math problems to make sure you're sober enough to text, but I'm not so sure I like this. Of course, it's always good to have friends around to stop you from late-night texting or tweeting or emailing or Facebook messaging. I just hope that if I work on myself in the daytime -- acknowledging what I want, who I want, and how I feel about myself at any given moment -- this sort of thing will happen less in the nighttime. I have talked a lot about the no contact rule on this website yet I have never really written an in-depth guide covering it. I guess I want to start off by saying that this guide is going to be very unique in that I have never quite written anything like it before for this website.
Well, this website is called Ex Girlfriend Recovery meaning that it is mostly focused on helping men get their ex girlfriends back (or even helping them get over their ex girlfriends.) Thus, all of the pages on this website up until this point have been applicable to men attempting to get their ex girlfriends back. The reason that this guide is unique is that the no contact rule is a universal rule that can be used by both men and women. Of course, this site is made for men so there will always be a bias towards situations in which a man is trying to win his ex girlfriend back but if you are a woman who somehow ended up on this page please don’t be scared away because of the bias. No, often times you have to reconnect with them after no contact, re-build trust, re-build attraction and go on a few dates before they are ready to re-commit to you.Do You Even Have a Chance of Getting Your Ex Back? If you are curious as to how this entire process of winning an ex back works then I highly recommend you read up on it through Ex Girlfriend Recovery PRO. I find that every expert out there has a different definition for how they define the no contact rule.
All kidding aside, my definition of the no contact rule has actually changed from when I first started my little online project of helping men and women get back with their exes a few years ago. I am the owner and operator of two websites that help men and women get back with their exes, Ex Boyfriend Recovery and Ex Girlfriend Recovery.
I am a firm believer that in order for people to take your advice you have to prove to them that you know a thing or two about what you are talking about so there are my credentials for you as to why you should listen to me on the no contact rule over my peers. The No Contact Rule- A specific period of time where you ignore your ex in every form imaginable. Now, I would like to break the definition above up into two different sections so I can help you understand what a real NC rule is. Above I pointed out that I have seen the no contact rule used a lot from men and women just like you. Yes, there are some idiots out there that actually think the no contact rule is permanent until your ex talks to you.
Yep, you read that right, they are idiots who are lazy because they refused to read the actual definition. Well, my experience with the no contact rule in the past has taught me some very important lessons. For one, a lot of men and women have trouble completing it which makes a massive no contact rule (like a time period of 60 days) hard to complete.
Of course, probably the most important thing that I have learned through my experiences with the no contact rule is that no two situations are alike.
Do you see what I mean when I say that there is truly no such thing as a universal no contact rule?
As a result of my knowledge I have came up with three different time periods for the no contact rule that are effective in most situations.
This time frame is perfect for a situation where an ex is getting really antsy when you are ignoring them.
Of course, you can’t mess around with people like this with long no contact rules like the 30 day rule and the 45 day rule. The 30 day no contact rule is the standard no contact rule that most of the experts out there say to implement.
Obviously I also recommend it but not in the same way that most of the other experts out there recommend it but more on that later. Well, if a woman contacts you only once during the NC rule then the 30 day rule is probably ideal.
Out of the three different no contact rules that I am recommending here I would say that without a doubt I recommend the 21 day rule the most. The real flaw with the longer no contact rules like the 30 day rule and the 45 day rule is that when you start them you have no idea how your ex is going to react. Are they going to go crazy and threaten to cut you out of their lives forever or will they be just as stubborn as you? The 45 day rule is perfect for people who have done something really bad in their relationships. For example, if you cheated on your ex multiple times with multiple different people then something tells me that he or she isn’t going to get over that in 21 days or even 30 days. For example, a regular breakup that ended on pretty decent terms isn’t going to require a 45 day rule. Of course, like I explained above with the 30 day rule I like to tell people that the NC rules are interchangeable on the fly. The essence of the no contact rule is going to revolve around your ability to ignore your ex.
Basically if you and your ex can somehow get in contact with one another I want you to stay away from them on it.
Just so I really hammer this point home I want to give you a common example that I come across. Lets say that you decide to use the 21 day rule no contact rule on your ex and everything is going good and on day 5 your ex reaches out to you. A few days ago a man who is trying to get his girlfriend back contacted me with a very interesting question. As I said above, there are a few circumstances where no matter what you do you are going to be forced to alter your no contact rule. Below I have compiled a list of all the situations which require you to slightly break the no contact rule and what to do in those situations.
Obviously it is going to be impossible to do a full out no contact rule if you work with your ex for a number of reasons but mainly because you have to retain a working relationship with him or her.
Lets say that you have decided that you are going to attempt the 21 day rule but you work with your ex. For 21 days you are going to implement the no contact rule meaning you ignore your exes every attempt of communication towards you.
If your ex tries to bring up the relationship then you need to very kindly tell him or her that you are not ready to talk about the relationship yet.
After your 21 days are up then you can begin the same re-attraction plan that everyone else on this site goes through after the no contact rule.
Usually what happens is that a couple who is living together gets into a massive argument which prompts them to break up and then they are forced to live together in awkwardness until their living situation is worked out. Well, in the instances where you are forced to talk with your ex about something stay away from your past relationship at all costs.
Another situation where I see people having to break the no contact rule is when they share a child with their ex.
If you are in a relationship long enough then most likely the two of you shared things throughout your time together. First off, any communication or meetup with your ex to exchange items should be only about the items. You didn’t think you were just going to sit around and wait for the NC to conclude did you? A common mistake I see of my visitors and even my clients is the fact that they are lazy when it comes to the no contact rule.
If you were a dating a girl you really loved (I am assuming you are man here since this website is tailored more towards males) and she broke up with you, you would probably be very upset. I want you to adopt this type of a mentality when it comes to your time during the no contact rule. I want you to look at what went wrong in your relationship on your side and shore up your weaknesses. For example, lets say that towards the end of your relationship with your ex you were a bit clingy or you had a bunch of fights over stupid things. Of course, achieving perfection when it comes to exes has more to do then just your mentality. You are using the no contact rule to get your ex back which means your ex already knows who you are to a certain extent.
However, we talked about the samurai mentality above and improving your personality so we have that covered but what I really want for you is to have a crazy before and after moment. The beauty of the no contact rule is that not only does it give you time to work on yourself but it also gives you time away from your ex to have a before and after moment. No, creating a perfect before and after moment is about upgrading your style, grooming, having good hygiene and looking like you are the envy of others.
One of the most interesting before and after shots that I have ever seen has to do with the famous celebrity David Beckham.
Now, we do have to take into account that in the before picture above Beckham looks to be about 16 and in the after picture he looks to be about 30 but push that aside for a moment. So, as you can see, it takes more than just losing weight to have a great before and after moment. 111How To Make Your Ex Girlfriend Think About You Constantly95Is Your Ex Girlfriend Thinking About You? My name is Chris, and I help millions of guys per year improve themselves, and get their ex girlfriends to come running back. I was with my girlfriend for a year where we went travelling together for 3 months and spent a lot of time together. Hi Gf has just broken up with me, I am doing the 30 NC we have been together for 2 years, I became clingy and she left me saying she doesn’t feel the same.
Be active during nc..be happy ?? improve yourself, change your appearance and be proactive ok?
Here’s the ironic part though, despite everything she did to wrong you, you are still in love with her.
It takes an incredible person to be able to even want to forgive someone for that type of betrayal. The truth is that if you have been cheated on you are the wronged party and that automatically puts me in your corner. Alright, I am a pretty traditional kind of guy so we are going to use my definition on physical cheating since I feel it is the strictest. For example, what if you went to a club with your girlfriend and she went to the dance floor and started grinding on another guy? In order to understand emotional cheating in the context I am trying to put it in you need to have some knowledge about the differences between men and women. Emotional cheating usually occurs when a woman doesn’t feel that her emotional needs are being met by you.
I think role playing works best for stuff like this so lets use you and your ex girlfriend as an example here.
Lets pretend that the two of you are dating again but you aren’t meeting her emotional needs so she begins to look elsewhere to have them met. In other words, if your girlfriend is emotionally cheating on you with someone else then the physical aspect of cheating is right around the corner. So, when their wives or girlfriends aren’t fulfilling their needs sexually they may look elsewhere.
Now that we have that basic understanding under our belts we can start talking about your specific situation. First, it is going to give you insight into what she was thinking when she decided to cheat on you. Second, it is going to highlight what you could have done differently in the relationship to potentially have stopped her from cheating on you. That’s when our good friend Bob comes into the picture and we all know how that ends. You have taken her for granted and as a result you don’t dress up nicely for her anymore. I went through all the comments on my other site, Ex Boyfriend Recovery, specifically on those pages relating to women cheating and determined the top reasons for cheating. If you cheated on your girlfriend first then it’s only human nature for her to make you want to feel the pain she is feeling.
In other words, it may be highly likely that she is going to go out and cheat on you just to get back at you. The most horrifying thing about these women is that no matter how perfect you are in the relationship they will still cheat on you.
This is a case where I would say that you shouldn’t try to get your ex girlfriend back because she is a high risk to cheat on you again.
Now, I understand that you want your ex girlfriend back but there are a few things that you are going to have to consider before we can even talk about that. Ok, what I am about to recommend here may be a little extreme but I think it needs to happen in order for the relationship with your ex girlfriend to be successful. If you get back together with your ex girlfriend and the person she cheated with is still in her life then the chances of your relationship with your ex girlfriend working out isn’t very good. Again, your well being is my only priority right now and I can tell you that you aren’t going to be able to forgive her for cheating on you if she still has this Bob in her life. The reason this rule is so important is that it is going to help you in the moving on process.


If she doesn’t agree to this rule then I am sorry to tell you but she is not even worth your time anymore. Well, just because your ex cheated on you doesn’t necessarily mean that getting her back is going to be an easy task. Infidelity in relationships is the number one betrayal that another human being can commit to another.
Your ex girlfriend cheated on you and unless you are some sort of robot you are probably still very angry about that fact. For the sake of argument lets say that I was able to get this ex girlfriend back who had cheated on me.
They weigh their options very carefully before they wade back into a situation where they could potentially get hurt emotionally. This is one of those types of situations where your ex could be at risk of getting hurt emotionally if she gets back with you?
This is why I have a strict rule that your ex has to end everything with the person she cheated with. If she felt so alone in her relationship with you that she was forced to cheat on you to feel “fulfilled” why would she want to put herself in a situation where that could occur again?
I think the only way that you can overcome this resistance is if you convince her that things could be different. If you have read any of the other pages of this site you are probably aware of the fact that I recommend the no contact rule a lot.
So, what are the rules of no contact when you are trying to get back an ex who cheated on you? I have found in cases where exes have cheated the no contact rule can be extremely effective in two ways. Hey, your ex cheated on you and if you aren’t upset about that then there is something clearly wrong with you. In my experience, an ex girlfriend who cheats is more likely to want to beg for your forgiveness. Me and my ex gf were together for 3 years, she broke it off saying she wasn’t happy, it was really out of the blue as we were looking at houses to move into, had holidays booked ect, basically we had the future planned. Bon, was with me one night whilst she was out of the house and he mentioned that he had been texting her and that he was becoming increasingly uncomfortable about the situation.
The house is not a minute and a half from my family home and at this moment my father and sister happened to drive past as I ran at him outside my house, my sister pulled me back, and this moment it turned to an Eastenders Christmas special when a local Bobby on the beat drove through the commotions summoned back up. I’m not trying to sound harsh, but believe me when I tell you that men will choose an average woman over the perfect woman if perfection comes with a bunch of drama.
I’ve dated guys who’ve gotten really offended when I knew more about a subject than they did. Okay, no matter how smart or handy you are with the tools, a man is still a man and needs to feel appreciated for his manliness once in a while. When you flirt, let your eyes meet his from across the room, smile at him (and only him), then shyly look down. One of the most important things I can say on how to get a guy to like you is to have a life of your own. In order to get a man’s attention you have to be soft and feminine at the right times as well as one of the guys at the right times. This page was created to encourage men and women to love more consciously; with courage, with hope, with your head as well as your heart.
That is, we must all agree that no one late-night texts elegantly, or eloquently, or respectably, and that's fine.
I really feel that humans should learn discretion on their own and that we should opt for self-reflection over app algorithms, even if this means that mortification after mortification must transpire before our behaviors can actually change.
Well, that mistake ends today as this is going to be the most complete guide ever created on the no contact rule.
Thus, the information that I am providing on this page can be applied by both men and women in their relationships. A lot of my readers make the mistake of believing that completing the no contact rule is all that they need to do in order to win their exes affections back.
In fact, I would say that just by completing the no contact rule you are only through half the battle.
You see, when I first started advising people I only knew the bare minimum about the no contact rule and while I was able to help a lot of people with my knowledge I really didn’t know as much as I do now. Through these two sites I have been able to see the no contact rule performed thousands of times. So, as you can see I have literally seen over 40,000 situations involving exes most of which involved the no contact rule. The complications to it really come in when you add other extracurricular factors into the equation.
Also, if you use a long no contact time period (like the 60 days one) the risk of your ex moving on to someone else is a lot higher.
However, it is really up to YOU to choose which one of these no contact rules are perfect for your situation. For example, lets say that you start your no contact rule and on day one your ex texts you. Instead just know that for someone like this, someone who is really troubled by your lack of attention to them, the 21 day rule is perfect because it allows enough time to go by for them to miss you and also for you to regain some control of the situation. While you may be able to get away with the 30 day rule you aren’t likely to get away with the 45 day rule with an ex who requires attention on this level. The 30 day period is perfect for women who don’t contact you very much during the no contact period. Of course, my experience has taught me a pretty clever trick when it comes to the 30 day rule. Lets say that you decide that you want to implement the no contact rule for 30 days and your ex goes crazy by contacting you 10 times. If your ex doesn’t contact you at all you can extend your no contact rule from 21 days to 30 or 45 days. So, if you find that your ex is really getting antsy about you ignoring him or her you might be better off altering the no contact rule to a shorter time frame. That means that if they contact you, you have to ignore them and if you feel the urge to contact them you cannot. Luckily, 75% of you won’t have to alter your no contact rule but for those of you that will this section is for you.
I can’t tell you how many times I get questions about how to approach this situation on a daily basis. The question you are wondering at this point is if no contact is even going to be possible for you. In the instances where work forces you to communicate with each other then it is ok to communicate as long as you keep it strictly about the business. A lot of the effectiveness of the no contact rule here is going to depend on how you handle your no contact rule alteration.
Don’t project a negative vibe because people are turned off by someone with a negative vibe. Remember, be friendly and nice but also be kind of short until your no contact time period has completed. However, if you find yourself in this situation then there are a few guidelines that you have to follow. Well, during the no contact rule I want you to adjust your mindset to where you won’t be clingy and where you wont take insignificant stuff so personally that you are willing to fight over it. Now, a lot of people out there are going to tell you that who you are on the inside is what really matters and while I definitely agree with them I think that in order for people to see who you are on the inside you have to first convince them on the outside.
Well, after the no contact rule your aim is to shatter their view of you and create a new one.
The last two months of our relationship consisted of her becoming increasingly distant and denying that there were any issues. I had a couple of weeks where I was a bit distant, she had work issues and she decided to break up with me and go back home to Italy for a month. Ex and I broke up about 5 months ago, she’s been talking to this guy she met up with a couple days after we broke up and finally posted them together a couple days ago. My ex girlfriend, only of a short term relationship 3 months or so broke up with me, I think I was a bit keen.
Seriously, you have my respect (and that is a hard thing to earn.) Now, I know you may be looking at this guide and thinking,Do You Even Have a Chance of Getting Your Ex Back?
However, I have an incredible amount of respect for a person who is willing to work though a betrayal like cheating because I know for a fact that I don’t posses that ability. In fact, I might go as far as to say that you are better than me when it comes to this particular aspect so I am more than willing to help you in your quest to get your ex girlfriend back if it is really what you want. The scariest part about it is that women are more likely to engage in this type of cheating.
This insight is going to be valuable because you are going to gain a deeper understanding of her perspective. Whats worse is that neither person is making an effort after work since you are both so tired.
If you don’t think that she is capable of that then I have over a thousand women on Ex Boyfriend Recovery that say otherwise. I mean, you always hear about the men who are serial cheaters but you know what, women can be serial cheaters too. Every time she texts him, talks to him on the phone or is around him in person you are going to drive yourself crazy with assumptions. If you ended up cheating on her first then you have to be willing to end all communication with the girl you cheated with so you can remove any doubt from her mind as well. So, instead of having those worries about Bob you are going to be able to focus on repairing your relationship. One of the biggest misconceptions that men have about their cheating ex girlfriends is the fact that they are going to come crawling back to them. Oh, not to mention that they are probably terrified that you won’t ever be able to get past their betrayal and are afraid that you will probably hold it against them for the duration of your relationship.
Speaking personally, if an ex girlfriend of mine had cheated on me I would find it incredibly hard to forgive her of this fact. Well, the entire time I would be with her I would probably only be thinking of her betrayal. She may be scared to get back into a relationship with you because she knows you may never forgive her for her infidelity. Some men can get so angry at an ex girlfriend cheating on them that they may cheat on them out of spite just to get back at them.
Yes, your ex girlfriend was the one who messed up but if you also show her that you are aware that you take some of the blame for pushing her to a point where she actually had to cheat she may be receptive and open her mind to coming back to you.
If you were to take a 21-45 day period where you just cut your ex out of your life for a while and focus on yourself you can work on moving past her betrayal.
So, if she starts begging for your forgiveness and you don’t give it to her (right now) due to the no contact rule she is going to feel bad about what she did but she will also begin to put you on a pedestal.
I went NC when we broke up after trying to reason with her and now around 7-8 weeks after the breakup, she is already in another relationship.
He asked if I preferred him to stop all communications with her and I (with my new found optomism) said no, I explained that she needs a friend other than me. Lest fast forward 5 minutes, miss X is terrified of my father as he has lost his temper and he is in all credit a 16 stone advertisement for the local gym.
There’s always that one guy who seems to look right through you, the guy you can’t get to notice you no matter how hard you try.
That’s right, you don’t have to have the looks of a supermodel or the brains of Einstein to get a guy to like you, it’s actually really simple.
If you’re the kind of girl that has the drama llama following her around like a pet, then you need to step back and take care of your crap. So, if you’re still getting calls by your ex, or you’re in some sort of sordid love affair with a man you’re not supposed to be with…get rid of your drama before you try to approach the guy you like.
As much as you might think men like the stereotypical no brained beauty, the truth is only shallow men like women who don’t think for themselves. Then, after he fixes it, you get to go all girly for a minute and tell him how awesome he is. You’re guy could be one of those guys (you never really know until you’ve flirted and scared him off, so this tip to get a guy to like you must be done with care). If a guy doesn’t like you for who you are and what you like, then he’s not worth your time. We, as humans, are allowed the time and space to be reckless with our words, even if doing so makes us want to die the next afternoon when we wake up, groggily pull our phone out from under whichever limb it was wedged and see the (textual) damage we've done. It's important to take precautions on your own, like deleting toxic numbers (belonging to old flames or, you know, professors) that you're likely to abuse. I mean, wouldn’t it be weird to expect that your ex would want you back after you ignored them for a certain amount of time?
So much so that I wrote up a 30,000 word guide that pretty much walks you through the entire process of winning an ex back. As a result of dealing with this many situations I was able to figure out a lot about what works about the no contact rule and what doesn’t work with it but perhaps the most important thing I was able to get was what you can do to shore up the weaknesses of the no contact rule. However, at the same time if you come back to your ex too soon with a super short no contact period then not enough time has passed for them to realistically want to take you back.
For example, someone who really needs space or needs to be alone for a long period of time will react better to a 45 day no contact rule versus a 21 day one. Most of the gurus out there that teach people about the no contact rule are iron clad about their beliefs on it.
The real reason is the fact that most people end up going crazy when you ignore them and the 21 day rule is perfect for dealing with people like that.


Well, in this case I think it would be smart to alter your no contact rule down to 21 days.
The only time that you would ever be able to contact them is after your no contact period has completed. So, while you are ignoring your ex boyfriend or girlfriend you should also simultaneously be working on yourself to be the best version of yourself that ever existed. Finally she broke up with me telling me the spark is gone and she doesn’t see a future with me.
It seems like a really small thing to break up over and I texted her most days trying to make conversation and get her back. I was telling her and showing her all the changes I was making in my life and she kept saying she was proud of me.
Do you realize that everything on that list is what a girlfriend is supposed to think about her boyfriend. For example, they will cheat for emotional reasons (which I will cover below) but it’s not just that, they will become attached to the affair.
Lets pretend for a moment that we can jump into a time machine and go back to the first day that you met her. I mean, even if you were the one to cheat on her first she shouldn’t have gone out and fought fire with fire. Remember, even with Bob out of the picture it is till going to take some time for you to be able to trust her again.
This makes your ex extremely wary of getting back into a relationship with you for a number of different reasons. Let’s Find Out!122The Advanced Guide To Using Facebook To Get Your Girlfriend Back73Your Ex Girlfriend Says She Wants Space… How The Heck Can You Win Her Back?
Would you say this is a rebound or do you think that this was going off during our breakup and he was the reason for our breakup? I have a bad habit of going for girls that are in bad relationships and basically, I am Bob. He didn’t lay a finger on he let but having been the victim of a serious domestic attack, just seeing him lunge terrified her and she ran to Bob for protection. Maybe he thinks of you as a friend, or maybe he doesn’t think of you at all…either way, it’s, well, crushing. If you know that the guy you like is into restoring old motorcycles and listening to 80’s punk, then you might want to brush up on those subjects. I’ve also dated men who thought my greater knowledge was the sexiest thing they’d ever heard. If you need help reaching something off a shelf, opening a jar of mayonnaise, checking the oil in your car…any of those things, ask him to assist you. You don’t have to give a belly rolling laugh, just a polite giggle and a genuine smile works just fine.
Be one of the guys when he’s talking about video games or comic books, but be a lady when you’re in a social setting so he realizes that you are indeed more than “one of the guys”. In a fast changing society, the need to know who you are and what you want are even more crucial to finding and keeping love. To talk about late-night texting etiquette is to talk about flimsy sober intentions, so weak they crumble after one whiskey sour and a guy who has the same name as your ex. And I'm pretty sure I've gotten to the bottom of it: I don't properly express myself during day-to-day life, when my feelings are sober and the sun is still out.
Of course, then we can look at the other side of the coin when you have a person who can’t go very long without interaction. He looks like he has gotten his fair share of sun in the after picture while in the before picture he is a bit paler. For 6 weeks after our breakup she continued to send me mixed messages and tell me she needed time and didn’t make a ‘decision’ and was not moving on. We have been split apart for 5 weeks now and she only started ignoring me last weekend when I asked to meet her. Before NC she said she was done with me and was really mean about a personal issue going on in my life. It was my idea as the chances of us being together were really small in future and it was bothering her a lot, so i broke up as i thought she wont be able to take the guilt of breaking up. Her heart and her brain both agreed that it was ok to go outside her relationship with you. The only thing that is missing between your girlfriend and her relationship with Bob is the physical aspect but I guarantee you this.
History is usually a predictor of future behavior and if you are dating someone who has cheated on all of her partners (and cheated on you) then I think its a pretty safe bet to assume that she has a problem.
There is now 3 riot vans, 3 panda vans, and 3 patrol cars in the street and a swarm of police officer tearing different fights up.
Still, playing the damsel in distress role is a great way to get a man’s attention and to show him that you think of him as a man. Don’t play too hard to get or he’ll think you’re not interested (or that you’re not worth it…both are bad). When you habitually keep your emotions bottled up and secret -- I don't like the way he's been treating me, I want to sleep with him, I wish my mom would stop nagging me about grad school applications -- it's more than likely they'll come out when your inhibitions are loosened, and hey, your phone's right there in your bra so why not get it (plus all those feelings) off your chest?
Mind you, this was from a guy I'd met on Tinder when researching this handy dating app quiz. I once deleted a guy's number only to find myself, one drunken Friday's eve, overcome with the urge to text him.
She had been distant but started to open up to me again just before she started to ignore me. Women on the other hand, are much more likely to carry on the affair and grow attached to the person they cheat with.
This escalated until we both became so insecure that we didn’t really talk dispite living together. The more of a life of your own that you have, the more interesting things you’ll have to talk to him about.
Instead, when you see him, flirt gently and pay attention to him, but every now and again be too busy to hang out or go against your daily routine so he wonders where you are. So I went on Twitter and tweeted at him, unknowingly inventing the Booty Tweet, asking him what he was up to. After some weeks she wanted to get back, but i denied, not coz i didnt want to get back, coz i knew she wont be able to handle the stress of future again n we ll have these pointless discussions again.
She then announced that she had been meeting up with him and on several occasions had kissed him.
The police released all involved and send Bob away and miss X was allowed to give me a hug and kiss before the police separated us. The next morning, I only noticed I'd done this when I went on Twitter to tweet a New York Times article on the AIDS epidemic in Africa.
The break up was also a bad decesion as i also failed my exams n all that negativity was also affecting me a lot n i cudnt think straight.
Meanwhile, my sister is now putting all of my clothes into bags to take away and screaming at miss X that she’s a slut, and this and that. Which means that at the end of the day, when it comes to mortification in the form of regrettable, drunken electronic communication, the only real rule you must stick to is one of self-love and acceptance and humor. My birthday is next week on the 20th day of this 21 day NC and if she texts me do I ignore that? I have exelled in my abilities to learn since a very young age and was reading encyclopaedias on botany by the time I was 5.l, but have always felt that I have been chasing my inevitable suicide my whole life. I agreed to take her back and knew that she could not keep him in the picture in the long term but decided to give her the freedom to come to that conclusion alone. I really want to ask her to meet for a coffee so she can see this is stupid but maybe it is a bad idea. I have hallmarks of Asperger’s syndrome, I am terrified of change and I plan for every eventuality months in advance in any situation. Miss X, is (bless her heart) not very bright and thinks that everything she hears is the gods honest truth and he more and more became able to use my game against me. Tonight, (the commotion happened yesterday) I went to meet miss X at her new job for finishing time and we spoke l, then went for food as the day before yesterday was my birthday and had planned on a meal together.
10 months into our 2 year relationship, while traveling out of the country with friends, we stayed at an apartment with two girls.
Then i wanted to get back, i made her sure that I will do everything to make the future happen, I apologised for being a jerk, but she denied n said she needs space n wants to be alone n away from expectations and on her own terms. We met in work and being that I have never had a personality of my own, I have taken aspects of my peers, manorisms, phrases and points of view to create a persona. I threw my toys out of my prom and told her that all of her possessions out of my house, she argued that it’s her house too until I pointed out that I made sure the house was in my name. The one girl offered for me to sleep in her bed instead of the hardwood floor and I accepted the offer.
I told her that I ll leave the door open n if she ever changes her mind about getting back, she should tell me. I know that in the future, however, there will be times when I want to respond and will respond. We didnt talk much, she did call me rarely to ask about some study related stuff as she is my junior in college. When I met miss X, I was loud, confident, cocky, and arrogant and the first shift we pulled together I found out she had a boyfriend but could also see that she was interested in me, or more to say my persona. I was happy with that decision initially and took to multiple social media platforms to bully, embarress and belittle her to hurt her like she had me.
I was not physically or emotionally involved with this girl – we literally just slept on the same surface.
But last day she went home n we had a long video chat, ended up having phone sex on the chat, n the day after. We spoke very little of the following weeks until she asked me for a male perspective on problems she was having with her at the time boyfriend. I have leaned all of her weaknesses, fears, worries and problems, of which there is no short list and I insulted her, brutally. But after that she said she felt guilty and we shudnot do it, she didnt change her mind n refused to get back together, i thought she has finally agreed to be together, but she didnt. She came to the house to discuss outstanding debts and we argued, I was brutal, she lost her temper and smashed things up and when the initial dust clouds landed we broke down in a haze of tears and both admitted that we love each other and still wasn’t each other. My ex saw I was friends with this girl on Social Media, saw that she had messaged me (probably something like ‘hope you made it back to the USA alright’) and asked me who she is.
She has since been staying at bobs house but has, by my own request, told me all the gory details and has told me that although she doesn’t regret the infidelity, it was not what her hurt mind was looking for, she felt detached and felt that there was little to no connection. Well a long story short her relationship broke down and part of my cover has always been having a girl on my arm as it is normal and I Previously mentioned I achieve this by manipulation.
So after she told me she was banging our mutual friend, I told her that I had actually slept in this girls bed but that nothing happened. She says that she still loves me and has said in front of Bob that she doesn’t love him and I told her that he was playing my game, what I have been telling her for weeks. She was obviously hurt, but I thought I was doing the right thing by being honest so we could reconcile and since I didn’t actually cheat it wouldn’t be the end of the world. She poured her heart out to me and in describing herself she describes me, with more detail and honesty than I ever could.
She says that she wants space from both of us and that she doesn’t know if she will even want to come back to me but that is something that she is coming home.
That was the moment that my life changed, for the first time in my entire life I woke up, I cannot put into words what happened to me. It gives me the chance to pick up the slack that I left and show myself to be the better option.
The constant thoughts of death and mortality went, I for the first time experienced hope, optomism, joy. I sti have my hope and optimism and although I am not righting this to ask advice any is more than welcome. So let’s skip ahead a few months, she and her family have a rather tarnished relationship and it was quickly outted that her mother hates me. I will also add that I have neglected to right all that has happened out as this is becoming a long winded rant. I have given her no reason, I helped pay bills that they could not afford, I did all I could. She has also asked that I seek professional help for my mental health issues and I intend to comply.
At the same time there has been a bloke that has helped me in life and I have him, when his father threw him out my parents took him in. This is an issue because I told him my tried tested method of getting girls, I told him how to structure his sentances, how to posture himself, everything, and I really gave him a master class, as he has never had a girlfriend and is openly Lonely. If at this point you are still interested and still reading I must now explain a bit about miss X. Next weekend will be 30 days since I sent my response to her letter, and 21 days since I asked if she received it, but her birthday is also coming up the following weekend which would be 30 days since I asked if she received the letter and 37 since I actually sent it.
Not sure if I should continue NC until she reaches out to me, or end NC a week before her birthday so that there is a build up before her birthday rather than randomly wishing her a happy b-day after NC, or the alternative which is not reaching out at all or doing a longer 45 day NC and reaching out after her birthday.
I am also afraid she might move home to be with her family soon because she doesn’t have many close friends in our city and her father is ill and she has been visiting home a lot.
I have been ignoring her on Instagram (she posts like nothing is wrong), but she recently liked a very flattering selfie that I posted a week ago.




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Category: How Get Your Ex Back



Comments to “How to do no contact to get ex back 2014”

  1. reper:
    She's going to make contact part and has your.
  2. R_i_S_o_V_k_A:
    For a lady to inform her ex that she still considers what you.