How to get an ex back after two years

Quotes on how to get over your ex reddit

How to get back with your long distance ex girlfriend,ways to win a ex girlfriend back,does he like me quiz we just met vince - Downloads 2016

Before I really get started I want to mention that while this guide is probably one of the most in-depth ones ever created about long distance relationships it pails in comparison to my systems, Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO and The Texting Bible. In other words, if you want even more personalized and in-depth information I recommend checking those out.
Long Distance Relationships- A specific type of relationship where the couple is separated by a considerable amount of distance.
Now, lets talk a little about the different kinds of long distance relationships that currently exist.Want to Know EXACTLY How Likely You Are to Get Your ExBoyfriend Back, in Only 2 Minutes? This is another one of those stories I hear way too often when it comes to long distance relationships.
We have already established that successful couples are always communicating with each other via a phone. Actually, the first time I heard about Skype was from a buddy of mine who was dating a girl that had left for college across the country. While things like Skype and FaceTime are fantastic tools for maintaining a technological closeness with your significant other nothing can beat actually seeing them in person. This point kind of goes hand in hand with the one above, in order to see your significant other someone in the relationship has to be willing to shell out the $’s.
This may be a little controversial but this is my firm belief, no relationship can survive without sex.
So, that leaves you in a really bad spot when you first embark on a long distance relationship. My friend (who I have mentioned a couple of times already on this page already) is one of the few people I know who has made a long distance relationship work. I wanted to put this section on this page for one simple reason, I want YOU to know if you are cut out for a long distance relationship.
What I am about to say is really important so I want to make sure that you are listening because I am about to give you the key to knowing if a LDR with your ex boyfriend could possibly work if you get back together. While you are figuring out that little nugget of knowledge I gave you in the section above lets talk about some of the things you have working against you in a long distance relationship. Make no mistake about it, being able to see someone you care about in person is a distinct advantage that regular relationships have over long distance ones. Another negative of LDR’s is that you cannot attend your significant others birthday in person. Lets fast forward for a minute and pretend that you and your ex boyfriend got back together. I saved this one for last for a reason, because it is the number one killer of long distance relationships. Adding insult to injury, it is likely you won’t have any clue because the two of you are separated by so much distance. You clearly want him back but are completely unsure on how to approach things because there is a great distance separating you. You can implement a no contact rule and work on evolving while the dust settles from the breakup fallout. The No Contact Rule– A set period of time where you will not text, call, email, facebook, google plus, snap chat, skype or talk to your ex in any way shape or form. Since that person emailed me wanting to know more about the guys perspective during the NC rule I figured everyone would so I wanted to put this section in.
Day 30: You send out your first text to him and he literally runs around like a little girl filled with excitement. Usually, with a normal relationship I recommend that women evolve during the 30 days into basically the hottest version of themselves that ever existed. The fact that it could be months before you see your ex in person just means that you have more time to prepare, more time to knock his socks off when he sees you.
I recommend picking up my book, Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO for ideas on how you can change both mentally and physically during the NC period. You are about to find out that the rules are just a little bit different when it comes to contacting an ex in a long distance relationship. IF you do succeed in reuniting you have to find ways around the headwind I talked about above. Before I dive in to the first contact text message I just want to make you aware that the example texts found below aren’t going to be enough for you. The first contact you have with your ex should be done via a text message like I recommend throughout my site.
Remember, your first contact text message has to be so intriguing that he will have no choice BUT to respond. The key with sending a first contact text message to a LDR isn’t to try to get him back.
If you are familiar with my monster 10k word post on how to get your ex boyfriend back then you should be familiar with this text message.
Now, I do feel it is important to point out that you can’t use any sexual memories or anything of that nature yet. Of course, you do have a small problem since you were in a long distance relationship with this person. As far as using jealousy directly with your ex via a text message the key here is to be subtle. I don’t care what she looks like, as long as I am getting compliments I am doing things right.
Part of the reason that I made you jump through all those texting hoops in the previous section (first contact, meme, etc) was to kind of butter your ex up for this type of a text message. If you were in a long distance relationship then I am sure you are pretty aware of what Skype and FaceTime are. Alright, you are going to make a phone call to your ex and see if you can set up a date where you two can see each other.
My name is Chris, and I help millions of women per year improve themselves, and get back with their ex boyfriends to finally have the life they dreamed of. My ex-boyfriend broke up with me 2 weeks ago but we gave last week a chance but we just ended up yelling at each other. Planning to do NC but honestly it would be hard for the both of us because we talk everyday….
He relocated to a new country 1 month ago and was struggling to cope with the new language and new job and he started to create distance between us and unknowingly I was trying to overcompensate that. I reacted in a defensive manner and sometimes I would repeat my point so that there would be no further misunderstandings. He broke up with me 4 days ago – 1) He admitted he was selfish but he had no room for a relationship at the moment. I texted him later that I realized there was no chance for reconciliation and I apologised and I wished he would be happy. Yesterday something happened on EGR (Ex Girlfriend Recovery) that has never happened before. 70% of the men that commented who were trying to get their girlfriends back were doing so from a failed long distance relationship. In other words, I am going to make this the most helpful guide on LDR (long distance relationship) ex girlfriends in existence. I suppose I should start by acknowledging my own experience in a long distance relationship.Do You Even Have a Chance of Getting Your Ex Back?
Now, you may be kind of creeped out that I actually remember the dates of my long distance relationship but I assure you there is a reason I remember it. Anyways, my point in telling you this is that I know a thing or two about what it takes to make an LDR work because I have been there in the trenches. You see, out of all the situations I have seen when it comes to relationships an LDR by far has the most hurdles to overcome and it takes not one but two special people to work together to overcome them.
Yes, that means that in order to make this entire thing work your ex girlfriend has to be as intense as you about the two of you ending up together but more on that later.
The obvious hurdle in the way is the distance but I am looking for something a little deeper than that. In all my years doing this I have never once heard of a situation in which a couple stays together forever in a LDR.
Ok, imagine that you and your ex girlfriend are still dating and are still in a long distance relationship. First Way- A breakup occurs where the the couple mutually agrees or someone in the couple no longer wants to continue. Obviously you are here because your long distance relationship ended in a breakup and you would have much rather of had it end the second more pleasant way.
Above I said I was in a LDR for five months and while my LDR did end it ended with me killing the distance and winding up with the woman I wanted.
And if you have read this far down the page that tells me that you had a long distance relationship that was unsuccessful and you are trying to get it back. What we have here (when we compare your LDR to mine) are two long distance relationships that both ended but ended in very different ways. What probably separated my experience from yours was the fact that I went into my LDR with a plan. It took five months to see that plan through but we did and as a result we had a successful LDR. We didn’t do what so many other couples out there do with just getting into a long distance relationship without defining future plans.
You are obviously here because you and your ex girlfriend broke up and you want to learn how to get her back. It takes a very special type of person to make a long distance relationship work and as much as this pains me to say, it could be entirely possible that you don’t have what it takes to make it.
You see, if you are really in love with someone but you can’t see them then you are going to be prone to a little jealousy. Lets say that you are still dating your ex girlfriend and are still in a long distance relationship with her. This is a completely normal situation to get jealous in and to be honest I wouldn’t really blame you for getting jealous. And basically alienate your girlfriend causing the two of you to have more than just distance on your mind. Your girlfriend is really struggling without you and having just a friendly lunch with an old friend makes her feel a little bit better about everything.
Above I said that if you want your long distance relationship to work you need to formulate a plan in which the two of you will end up together permanently. Assuming you have done that then that means you are going to have to be patient until the time comes for that plan to come to fruition. Well, when I think back to that time the thing I remember most about it was the loneliness and the impatience I felt. My (then) girlfriend and I had worked out a deal where we would see each other once every single month until we moved in together. There are two things that you need to have in order to realistically have a shot of making a long distance relationship work. Scenario 1- You and your girlfriend are both 18 years old, in high school and she has just moved two states away. Scenario 2- You and your girlfriend are both 30 years old, in a long distance relationship and both have jobs where you work A LOT and can’t get time off to see each other.
I have some bad news for the younger (high school) readers here who are in a long distance relationship. Really for a LDR to work out you have to find a more permanent solution and that usually requires someone to move to the other person. Lets say that you and your girlfriend talk it over and the both of you decide that you should be the one to move to her. In case you have forgotten scenario two consists of both you and your girlfriend being around 30 years old, in a long distance relationship and you both have established jobs but not a lot of time. If you have a well paying job then you probably have to work a lot of hours (I am from the U.S. Above I established that if you are in a long distance relationship then you should at least be seeing your significant other once a month.
The obvious work around is to find a permanent solution where both of you can see each other every day but then you are faced with another problem. Oh, and lets not forget that no man or woman wants to take that big of a risk without re-assurance that the relationship is going to be worth it and they won’t be made a fool of. If you don’t have the means (time, money) to make a LDR work then your chances of winning your ex back really decrease.
Now that we have that out of the way lets take a look at some of the other challenges with long distance relationships. Here’s the thing though, all of her friends are single and as she goes out to the bar with her friends she gets hit on and her friends are encouraging her. You will find that thoughts like this constantly creep in when you are in a long distance relationship. I mean, any mention of another male that isn’t you will have you thinking like this and it is so easy to grow irritable and start a fight with your girlfriend over nothing because of it.
In fact, so many people have this problem in long distance relationships that entire breakups occur just because someone was paranoid. Long distance relationships don’t really do anything for our libidos needs now do they? Heck, you can’t even hold hands or hug your girlfriend if you really wanted to and sex, well lets just say sex is off the table for a while. Below I have created a graphic for you outlining what I consider to be the best way to increase your chances of getting your LDR girlfriend back. Avid readers of this site will notice that when you look at the long distance plan there isn’t too much that differs from the general plan I teach on Ex Girlfriend Recovery PRO except for a few things. It just so happens that those few things change the plan drastically so don’t be fooled.
Like always, I am going to be covering each of the seven steps outlined in the game plan above in a very in-depth manner so if anything is confusing to you right now try not to jump off the ship yet. You remember the “Hell List” above in which I talked about what it takes to make a long distance relationship work? Well, if you really want to increase your chances of getting your long distance relationship love life back on track then its a really good idea for you to determine if you even have a realistic shot of winning your ex back. Lets say that you are a high school kid who is 18 years old and your girlfriend just moved a few states away.
Lets make another assumption and say that you do manage to win your ex girlfriend back by following steps two to seven from the game plan above (and the game plan above has been tested and proven to work.) Well, you are still young and it could be years before either you or your girlfriend could move to each other.
In other words, history will probably repeat itself if you don’t have what it takes to make things work.
Now, I don’t know about you but what I am going for here is to prevent history from repeating itself. I know you are hurting right now as a result of this breakup but you know the only thing that will hurt more than the feeling you are feeling now.
Doing all the work I outline above, getting your girlfriend back and then having her break up with you again. Seriously, if you feel like you can’t make a relationship with her work long term then what’s the point of even trying to get her back? So, don’t waste your precious time getting a girl back just so you can wind up hurt by another break up again.
Of course, what do you do if you determine that not only can you get your ex girlfriend back but you can keep her when you have her back? If you really believe that you can get her back and find a permanent solution where you can kill the distance then you have my blessing to move forward with the game plan above. Seriously though, I really want you to be sure about this because once you get started on this game plan it is going to take dedication on your part and you are going to have to answer a lot of hard questions and overcome a lot of hard obstacles. Avid readers of Ex Girlfriend Recovery will know that I am a huge fan of the no contact rule. Heck, I even think an argument can be made that no contact is even more effective in long distance relationship. If you truly have a LDR with your girlfriend then that means that you probably don’t see each other in person that often. So, that means that you and your girlfriend were both constantly checking your phones to see if the other responded to a message, Skype call or phone call yet.
The No Contact Rule- A designated period of time where you completely ignore your ex in every form imaginable. Well, when you do use the no contact rule on an ex girlfriend who you had a long distance relationship with then the chances that she will be constantly checking her phone waiting for a response from you is actually pretty high. Your ex girlfriend on the other hand is constantly checking her phone waiting for a response.
And again, your ex girlfriend is constantly checking her phone waiting for a response from you.
Most men make the mistake of believing that all they have to do to get their girlfriend back is make it through a period of no contact and their girlfriend will magically come running back. The Gatsby Method is an idea I came up with that describes what you are supposed to be doing during your period of no contact. During your no contact period away from your ex girlfriend it is your job to improve in every way imaginable as much as you can. The idea is that by the time you attempt to get your girlfriend back you are going to be a new man… a more attractive man in every way. It is a legitimate question to ask because it is not outside the realm of possibility that your ex girlfriend can move on during the no contact rule. Well, what I would recommend for those of you who are deathly afraid of your girlfriend moving on is to use indirect methods of reaching her. An indirect method of reaching your ex girlfriend DOESN’T mean you pick up your phone and shoot her a text or call. Through the use of social media, mutual friends and jealousy tactics you can ensure that you can stay on her mind.
Imagine your ex girlfriend logs on to Facebook one day and out of curiosity stumbles across your profile.
When she goes to your profile she is filled with anger, sadness and a bit of regret as she notices that you are having the time of your life with her. Please turn your attention to this article in which I teach you the proper way to use Facebook to improve your odds of getting her back. Well, in my experience your ex girlfriend is eventually going to ask a mutual friend how you are doing if you are doing the no contact rule. I have found that the best way to approach this is to tell your friends to tell your ex that you seem to be doing fine and that you aren’t talking to them too much about the breakup.
What I mean by that is that jealousy methods can work for you or they can work against you.
If you are starting a fire and you know exactly how to tame it then a fire can have a lot of uses.
Well, in step five we are going to be focusing on how you can use text messages to lightly re-build attraction with your girlfriend. As a little kid they scared me to death but as I grew to be older I fell in love with them.
Ok, horrible joke aside I want you to implement something called roller coaster theory for when you do contact your ex girlfriend. Well, it is something I originally came up when I was working on my other site, Ex Boyfriend Recovery. I was daydreaming one day about riding roller coasters and how much fun it used to be back in the good ole days and I made a very interesting connection between roller coasters and texting. I have to keep you guys interested in exploring my site or grabbing my e-book somehow so I can’t give you the keys to the kingdom all the time.
Anyways, once you have build enough attraction with your ex you can turn your attention to building attraction through a phone call and skype. Of course, there is an interesting little secret I am going to let you in on when you meet up with her in person again. I mean, a non threatening meet up after you have built enough attraction is a great way to further build attraction and get a step closer to getting a girl back.
No, you might actually have to travel halfway across the country or even to a different country just to see her.
Oh, and I volunteered you as the one to go out to see her because women love to feel romanced or like a man is willing to go to the ends of the earth for her so lets give her this to further cement your importance to her. So, the idea here is that you build up a ton of attraction through texts, phone calls and FaceTime or Skype and there is no way she can so no to someone traveling just to see her! Lets just assume that you did your job right and built up enough attraction and she says yes to a meet up. Do you understand the significance of a long distance ex girlfriend say yes to you traveling to see just her?
Your ex boyfriend who you still have feelings for has just told you that he is going to travel across the country to see you. Once you have your ex girlfriend saying yes to a meet up like this then the cat is pretty much in the bag.
The probability of her saying yes when you do ask her to be your girlfriend again is very high. My name is Chris, and I help millions of guys per year improve themselves, and get their ex girlfriends to come running back.
Therefore last night she ended it saying that she can’t give me a relationship as she needs to focus on her business and its not fait on me. We hear from a woman who wishes to remain anonymous who has found herself in a bit of a pickle. There’s—I think something like four free giveaways of content and pdf and I do the success story report where I took a lot of my successes and figured out exactly what made them successful.
I just want to take a moment and thank you for having the courage to put your situation out there. I can maybe buy into the thinking that he doesn’t know what he wants to do with his career.
So, make sure when you implement the things I’m going to tell you about that you don’t do anything stupid like this because I’m not going to lie to you. That could be a contributing reason for the breakup but you hurt yourself when you told him that you slept with someone else because going forward now, he’s going to question everything you say. So, they know exactly what they have to do to get their ex back in their situation and I was writing I think what was like a hundred pages and I was super excited about this.
So, approaching this situation, basically if you’re going to deliver bad news to your ex boyfriend or if you’re going to bring up something negative, do it when he’s in a good mood.
Sometimes when people mess up on the no contact rule, they go back to square negative one because the no contact rule losses its effectiveness but you, since you really didn’t do the no contact rule that much, it’s not going to lose much effectiveness.
Well, I mentioned that he’s going to be questioning you every single time you tell him something now because in the back of his mind, he’s still going to wonder if you slept with someone.
Let things unfold naturally because you’ve already proven that he wants you back and I really think you have a great shot at getting him back.
Not to put yourself in a position where he can look at you say, “She’s not trustworthy.” And that sometimes means not going out to a club or something with your friends if they’re going to take pictures, post it on Facebook. Alrighty… It’s time for another episode of “The Ex Boyfriend Recovery Podcast!” Awesome, right? I am currently in the process of writing a massive guide about going on dates with an ex boyfriend when I stumbled across this question from a woman who wants to remain anonymous. Anonymous and her boyfriend have been broken up for a few months and she has done a phenomenal job of sticking to my advice.
Her ex boyfriend is currently in possession of a record that she wants back and her ex actually called her to set up a day where they can meet up and he can give it back.
Welcome to the ex boyfriend recovery podcast where we help you get your ex back and have the fairy tale ending you deserve. Now, you may be asking yourself, “Well, how can this book be specific to my situation?” Because without a doubt, that was the number 1 complaint. And I am structuring the book in a certain way where it creates a game plan for you to follow and then based on your situation, it’s going to teach you how to alter that game plan to fit your needs perfectly-- long distance relationships for example. And I am structuring the book in a certain way where it creates a game plan for you to follow and then based on your situation, it’s going to teach you how to alter that game plan to fit your needs perfectly– long distance relationships for example.
We’re trying to create this family atmosphere where we help everyone, where we get and respond to everyone but enough about that. You know I was taking notes and my wife she was sitting right next to me and she stopped everything she was doing and she was listening as well which is kind of rare for her and then after you were done talking, she literally turns to me and goes, “I really like her voice. So, that’s when I knew for sure that I definitely had to feature your question on the podcast but anyways, you have done a pretty good job at advancing to the point you’re at currently. I’m of the mind of the value chain where you have to start off slow and kind of slowly build up the attraction into a point where it boils over and he just can’t not be in a relationship with you.


I’m actually writing a really good article coming up about this very kind of question that you asked, which is another reason why I picked your question because I’m literally writing an article about it and when you were asking about how to handle the date or what you do during a date, I just thought it was a perfect match for what I was already currently working on.
But it seems to me like you’ve already advanced to where you’ve locked down a date with your ex boyfriend. So, when it comes to dating you shouldn’t operate under the assumption that it’s going to take one date to get your ex-boyfriend to agree to be back in a relationship with you. So, one of your big questions was should you ask him to hang out because you say he’s operating under the assumption that he’s just going to give you your record back and then that’s going to be it.
I’ve talked about this a lot throughout ex-boyfriend recovery and it’s sort of ending the conversation at the high point. My wife the other day, she sent me this really interesting email and specifically, she’s in charge of Youtube and she wanted to do a Youtube video on make up and dressing up clothes and everything like that. It’s funny… I am currently in the process of writing a massive guide about going on dates with an ex boyfriend when I stumbled across this question from a woman who wants to remain anonymous. Now, I got to work on a few things to get this thing live but it should be going live really soon. Now, about the emotional affair, just, I’m not shocked that it’s turned sexual in nature now.
But your question specifically was about the no contact rule and if too much has happened for you to implement it. Now, I talked about that sort of success story report I put together where I looked at all the testimonials that I had saved up and one of the things that I found that was most prevalent in the successes is that, 74% of the successes all use the no contact rule. So, if that doesn’t tell you how powerful the no contact rule is, I don’t know what else will.
Another really popular thing the no contact rule does is it actually works on getting him back on two fronts. The less talked about strategy of the no contact rule, the less talked about front of the no contact rule is actually the personal recovery front. If you can prove that you’ve moved on with the no contact rule, if you can kind of move on, on purpose without really moving on internally.
Now, the thing Mary, I think you need to do is, if I’m going to recommend the no contact rule for you, I think you should do probably a 30 day no contact rule. So, in that study I did where I talked about the testimonials that I looked at, trying to find co-relations between the successes and failures, the one thing without a doubt that I learned when it came to a man moving on to a new girl, is he almost always comes back to the original ex which is you in this case Mary, if he gets the grass is greener syndrome. And our guest today is a woman by the name of Erica who finds herself in this exact predicament. The No Contact Rule Book that I’m working on right now, basically covers everything you’ll ever need to know about the no contact rule and my thinking or my line of thinking on how someone should do the no contact rule has changed. So, basically this book is just going to cover any kind of question that you’ll ever have about the no contact rule and I’m super excited about it because I don’t think I’ve ever written anything this comprehensive. I mean, you don’t really need to know what a LDR (long distance relationship) is right? In this type of relationship the two of you have never met on person, you have only ever met online. If you are here it is most likely because you and your ex had a long distance relationship but you are now broken up. I mean, for god sakes there is an entire section of this website dedicated solely to texting.
I remember him telling me that they skyped every single day and it had helped a lot to maintain the closeness that both of them were so vigorously craving.
I have no statistics to back up the claim I am about to make but I think women can go without sex longer than men can. You see, in order to get your ex boyfriend back if there is a considerable amount of distance separating you right now it is important to discuss all of the things that you have to overcome. Don’t get too down though because I am going to give you the tools to combat all of this headwind later in this article.
Admittedly, it will be more effective if you and your ex were used to talking to each other every single day. One of my visitors was reading through the site and found solace in a paragraph on one of the pages. Remember, this isn’t a vacation and if you want him back you have to be willing to put int the work. That means, women in normal relationships have 30 days before they potentially could see their ex in person. If you are an avid reader of this site then you will find the next phrase I am about to say all too familiar.
In this section I am going to give a pretty in-depth game plan that you should follow when talking to an ex who you were in a long distance relationship with. With this text message you are really trying to get your ex boyfriend to remember some of the good memories you had together.
Here is an unknown fact about this site, did you know that I actually get men contacting me? The key to pulling off a jealousy text isn’t to actually tell your ex that you are out with someone new, it is to plant the idea in their head and let their minds run wild with all kinds of assumptions. The reason this text is amazing at making an ex boyfriend jealous is that it is so subtle that your ex has to make all kinds of assumptions. Personally speaking, I am one compliment from the opposite sex away from having a great day. Obviously, you are looking for another positive response from your long distance partner here. If not, they are essentially video software you can download to your smartphone (or computer) that will let you talk to the person face to face electronically. Since there is long distance involved one of you is going to have to agree to come see the other one.
A kind of condensed version of getting your ex boyfriend back if you are in a long distance relationship. His ex girlfriend left him for another guy and was engaged, she just ended the engagement which I think is what is happening. Look, the absolute worst place for anyone to be is in a relationship that is stagnant and isn’t going to move anywhere.
Now, a little jealousy here and there is ok but really what matters is how you handle the jealousy. Well, I can remember very clearly that all I would have to look forward to were those little meet ups once a month.
While you probably do have plenty of time to dedicate to a relationship you don’t have enough money to make it work. I mean, if your girlfriend is living two states away then you can expect to pay a minimum of $150 in gas there and back.
Well, if you work a lot then you are going to have to dip into your vacation days in order to make this possible but then you get into the fact that you only have a certain amount of vacation days to dip into. Since you haven’t been around for a while she has been quite lonely and starts liking the attention. So in other words, you have to actively work during no contact so you can maximize your chances of winning your girlfriend back. No, rather there is a sneakier way to make sure that you stay on her mind throughout the no contact period. When this does happen you want to make sure that he or she relays the information that you want your ex to know. I am at the stage where I can travel for 6 months and I have the money to do so, so I want to meet her but I’m not sure about this other guy in her life. I stumbled upon it when looking for advice after me and my long distance Girlfriend broke up. She was very upset and said that we might pick up in future and I could tell she didn’t want to end it. The Ex Boyfriend Recovery Podcast is one of the most popular self help and sexuality podcasts found on the market today. We have had a lot going on lately and I kind of neglected getting new content out there but I am going to work really hard to stay on schedule of posting one of these episodes a week.
If this is your first serious boyfriend, I’m assuming you are his first serious girlfriend and at that age, if you’ve only experienced one person or you’ve only been in a relationship with one person. That can be kind of a tough thing because society has kind of painted men into a corner where men are the providers. You had him in your hands, I don’t know what you were thinking with regards to trying to make him jealous or make him upset by telling him that you slept with someone else.
I know I’ve been kind of getting onto you and telling you what you did was not a smart way to approach it. I think for him to even ask that question of you in the first place means he’s worried about it. Thus, she is wondering how to turn a meet up that's supposed to be about a record into a date where they can hang out.
I kind of took a break last week, mostly focused on Youtube and creating videos because I really--I guess it’s fun to be on camera. I am actually in the process of rewriting my most popular book- Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro and this thing is going to be a behemoth. You know like, “The book created this nice little template for me to work in but it doesn’t speak directly to my situation.” I’m glad you asked that. So, yeah, I’m super pump about it, you know we just finished writing a new book-- The No Contact Rule Book.
Thus, she is wondering how to turn a meet up that’s supposed to be about a record into a date where they can hang out. I kind of took a break last week, mostly focused on Youtube and creating videos because I really–I guess it’s fun to be on camera. So, yeah, I’m super pump about it, you know we just finished writing a new book– The No Contact Rule Book. When I am choosing questions to feature on the podcast, often times my wife whose desk is sitting right next to mind, listens to me listen to all voice mails and you’re particular question, when I was playing it, listening to it, I was interested in it. To me it looks like, you’re maybe rushing a little too fast but I’m not saying you shouldn’t go get your record or anything like that.
So, congratulations for that and I’m going to do everything in my power right now to help you on the date.
So, I think a lot of my effort or focus is on helping those people at the beginning of the strategy but that doesn’t mean we should leave out the people who are the end of the strategy– dating. You know you go on what I like to call kind of a small date, the medium date and then large date or the romantic date and he still hasn’t asked you to be his girlfriend again. I think if– I would always let my wife dress me because that’s how bad I am at dressing up.
She sent me this really interesting email about what the clothing says about you and what the color of the clothing says about you. I know it takes a lot to pour your heart out in these messages or in these voicemails rather and it can be kind of tough to think about your situation or verbalize it. I know it seems really tough in your own head or in your own situation but your situation’s a little bit more normal than you think. It seems like he is a little bit remorseful about the emotional affair or the cheating now or the sexual affair that he’s having. Here’s the tactics that work the best, here’s the tactics that really don’t work that well.” And, I did certainly find statistics like that but what was the most interesting part was the actual situation in which people recover their exes from. The point that I want to—I guess point to right here is the fact that you said that he moved out two months ago and you’ve kind of actively been trying to get him back or at least you’ve been displaying that. And it’s something I like to call was sort of –I guess the best way I can explain it is when he senses that you’ve moved on completely, you become more attractive to him. I don’t know how to describe it, other than it’s this interesting phenomenon that happens where he senses it and it makes you more attractive to him. Now, if you’re familiar with my website or any of the books that I’ve written, I talked about the three major no contact rule time periods. Today we’re going to be hearing from a woman named Erica but before I get that, I have a special announcement to make. When I first started the website I always recommended a 30 day no contact rule and how you had to stick to the 30 no contact rule no matter what. Today, I am going to tackle this very complex subject and give you a set of actionable steps you can take to drastically improve your chances of getting your relationship back.
In my mind, a true long distance relationship is one where you are separated by states, countries or even oceans. A couple is dating and due to a certain set of circumstances one of them has to relocate (very similarly to the marriage LDR above.) Of course, there is one BIG difference. The thing is though, when you met online you were separated by a considerable amount of distance and even today you are separated by a considerable amount of distance. Nevertheless, you are here because you want your ex back and you are willing to do whatever it takes.
Of course, couples in long distance relationships take things a step further by actually doing things together on the phone. Unsuccessful LDR’s usually have one couple member constantly freaking out over what the other one is doing. For a couple separated by distance it is imperative that you take advantage of such electronic inventions. I don’t care what you say, in my mind nothing beats seeing someone you care about in person. He has been dating his girlfriend for about five years (two of which were long distance.) When I asked him how he did it, how he could bear being away from his girlfriend that long he muttered two simple words.
I am not going to lie to you, most long distance relationships I have dealt with fall apart because they require an extreme amount of patience and dedication. Essentially I gave you the qualities that you need to have in order to be willing to have a LDR.
They do their best to call each other every day but their schedules are so busy that they sometimes forget to. What it all boils down to is that when you are physical with someone it provides a sense of security and togetherness that you just can’t make up over long distance. While some guys will say they hate dating I think most of us enjoy them a lot more than we let on. Well, in order to keep your relationship alive you have agreed that you will commute to see each other more in person.
However, even if that wasn’t the case I would still recommend doing the no contact rule. If you do slip up and talk to your ex then you are going to have to start over from day 1 again.
Now, people in long distance relationships have a pretty good advantage over normal relationships when it comes to this section.
While a lot can happen over the month I am not entirely sold on a life changing transformation happening in that amount of time. I will never forget the time when I was a little boy and went with my dad to watch him negotiate for a car at a car dealership. Also, another little nugget of knowledge I can give you is to make sure you use a lot of details.
Yes, it is a risk and you could fall flat on your face but in the end fortune favors the brave so it is time to be brave.
So yesterday I didn’t see him today not sure because his sister is coming with him to town. As I was going through a hard time at work, I texted him more often and usually initiated contact first. He was sorry for me and told me he felt too stressed and insecure right now and said we can talk later as friends. In fact, we despised them so much that we formulated a plan to get rid of the distance as soon as possible. Pretty soon one thing leads to another and she is drunk and making out with some random dude.
So, my goal for this guide is to come up with a plan that you can follow to increase your chances for success. We have never formally met in person, but I want to and have the opportunity too very soon. We havn’t been texting each other for the past few days, but I know she is always looking on my Facebook page, liking my photos and commenting on them.
We live in different Countries so only see each other every 6 months but we speak every day by text and Skype.
Seiter takes real life situations on one by one and provides valuable advice that have helped thousands of women find the peace (and success) they are striving for.
Got a little busy, we recently released a quiz on ex boyfriend recovery.  Basically, that defines what kind of chance you have of getting your ex back.
I know a lot of women are scared to do that but I think the women who do end up having the courage and the women who are lucky enough to have their question picked on the podcast, get a lot of value out of what I say because I spend basically 20 minutes talking about that situation. You believe he’s going through a quarter life crises which I’m not quite sure I buy it all.
I know not necessarily anymore that women’s rights have done a lot for equality and things like that but if you look at the numbers men still earn more than women. I mean I can understand why you did it because maybe you’re upset that he broke up with and you wanted to hurt him that way that he hurts you. I was telling people on the emails, I was telling people on the comments, I was telling people on Youtube, I was telling my wife about it, I was telling my dad about it.
Specifically if you should do the no contact rule in your situation and you seem like you’re really well read. Now, the biggest misconception about the no contact rule, that I found to be lately is a lot of people just use it to focus on their ex boyfriend but that’s not what it’s for. And there’s a lot of more interesting things going on but the podcast is still near and dear to my heart. Today’s question comes from someone who wanted to remain anonymous but she has a real interesting question that I don’t think I’ve ever covered on the podcast before. I’m going to give you certainly tips on what to do during the date but I would say, after the date, focus on building more attraction before you see him again in person. You did the no contact rule which is phenomenal but where I think you fell down a little bit was the attraction building through texting and then after texting you have to transition to phone calls.
So, when it comes to dating your ex, if I were to pick out one of the weakest parts about ex  boyfriend recovery, it’s the fact that we feature a ton of advice on the first parts of my overall strategy for getting an ex back, for parts like the no contact rule, parts like text messaging, parts like talking on the phone but we don’t really talk about dating a lot and what to do during the date.
This process will take time which is why I like to teach what I like to call the three date method.
Well, you just have to interest him, you’re right about being chill and not bringing up really bad memories or super emotional stuff. Especially if there was cheating involved, you should definitely not talk about that but talk about something that’s going to interest them. If it was up to me, I would probably go everywhere in tennis clothes because they’re so comfortable but obviously, I can’t do that. I’m sure you’ve seen this when it comes to like sales and advertising and how like yellow—you know like McDonald’s has red-yellow or something because it catches your eye and it makes you want to go in but when it comes to relationships, it’s really interesting in what the colors mean. So, if you want him to look at you in a passionate way or you want him to be super into you, red is definitely what you want to wear. So, I just want to take a moment and thank you and I’m going to do everything in my power to possibly help you. Let’s try to understand what’s going on in his mind because from there we can kind of build out and structure a game plan around your situation.
But it doesn’t seem like he’s willing to take the necessary steps for the therapy to work because often times, you can pull the weight of the relationship boulder yourself but really in order to move the boulder and keep it up, you need two people.
It looks to me like he’s moved on to someone else but don’t let that get you down I think a lot of women freak out when they hear that. I actually think there’s no better time for you to do the no contact rule than right now because it’s actually really difficult to do a no contact rule which, I talked about in the no contact rule book that I mentioned earlier in this podcast episode. Absolutely now is the time to do the no contact rule but here’s kind of where things get a little bit more interesting. But let’s go into fantasyland here and pretend that you’re using the no contact rule on your ex and it works and you get him back. It’s sort of like that—I don’t know the best way I could describe it is maybe if you give a toddler a toy, well the toddler plays with the toy a bit and then throws the toy away. So, the no contact rule—the reason it’s such an incredible strategy is it touches on so many things.
I don’t know if you’ve known this but, I have actually been writing a new e-book specifically about the no contact rule and I’m almost done with it which I cannot tell you how excited I am.
Well, as I grew up more in this niche and as I’ve learned more about people’s situations, I came to notice that staying strict to a 30 day no contact rule the entire time isn’t necessarily the smartest way to play it.
Now, I do want to give you a word of warning that this page is probably going to end up being the second longest in the history of this site.
However, after time one of the couple members are presented with an opportunity that causes them to move away for a considerable distance (or in some cases they are forced to.) If you and your ex are in a situation like this then this page can work for you. Instead of relocating indefinitely the person that relocated is only going to be gone for a few months. Well, I suppose I should never say never but I am generally not a fan of them for one specific reason. I remember staying up so late at night and literally talking until a girl would fall asleep on the phone with me.
In addition, I gave you the qualities that you can’t have if you are going to do a LDR.
I want you to think really hard and figure out if you think HE has what it takes to make a LDR work.
The distance causes problems mostly because they haven’t seen each other in person in two months. No doubt about it this is some serious headwind that you are going to have to figure out a way to overcome.
These dry spells will make that man horny and he will be more likely to cheat because of that. Where you have the advantage is the fact that it could be months before you even get to see your ex. We want what we can’t have and since I am assuming that you want your ex boyfriend back really really badly right now he is sensing that he can have you. The thing about my dad is that he is always prepared when it comes to these types of things.
I would like to recommend that you run it through what I like to call the first contact text. Actually, I don’t want to dive in too deeply here because I already created a post that will help you pimp out your Facebook profile and I cover jealousy in there too! However, every once in a while there is a man that will reverse engineer the process and wind up on this site because he wants his ex girlfriend back.
If you are going to compliment your ex boyfriend who you were in a long distance relationship with you have to be really careful.
I just want you to discuss your relationship and any feelings that you may be having for each other still.
That will require you to clear your schedule and have some extra spending cash which is why I want you to call him and let him know (to see if he digs the idea or not.) If he does then you are in! I still have feelings for him but I’m holding back of how I love him because trying to save myself first.
I want to give her a few months of no contact then drive to san diego to visit her face to face and talk about it..do you think this is the way to go? When we started chatting, it was great, we would always text, face time each other and communicate on a regular basis. She always called me everyday but since meeting this new guy she has been talking to him at night, rather than me.
We had this amazing time like I said on top conversation with her visiting me in San Diego . Maybe you wanted to get some sort of validation from him that he cared for you in a deep level and you certainly got that but it really didn’t do anything to help  you with getting him back.
Telling him or hurting him like this served no purpose for you other than just getting that validation but the fact that he was on a date with you, the fact that it only took a week of ignoring him to get on this date should have been validation enough that he’s still had feelings for you. Even if you tell him that you lied, even if you explained your reasons for lying, in the back of his mind, he’s not going to believe you. I was really excited about this thing because I really thought it was going to be revolutionary but back to the story, the particular day I was cleaning up my desktop and I happened to put the book that I was writing, the book that I spent a month and a half working on into the trash bin and then I clicked on the trash bin and then I erased it. You lied to him about sleeping with someone else, why you did this, I think my personal belief is you were trying to find some sort of validation that he’s still loved you and maybe you thought this was the best way to bring it out, maybe you were just trying to hurt him.


So, what I think you need to do before you enter the no contact rule is let him know that you were lying. Yes, it is for making an ex miss you, it’s for healing an ex’s feelings emotionally, it’s for leveling you out emotionally and that’s—it’s really a two pronged approach in the fact that, yes, you are using it for your ex but you’re also using it for yourself. So, here I am again for another week and another episode of the ex boyfriend recovery podcast. I really took a lot of the people who complained about what the book didn’t have or what the book lacked in the past.
I don’t know when it’s going to be completed because I want to do a really good job for you but basically what’s going to happens is I have compiled a huge list of all the situations I’ve ever encountered through ex boyfriend recovery.
So, anyways– two year relationship, ended basically in the “Girl’s-a-crazy-this-guy’s-a dumb” paradox thing. I’m not trying to say anything mean to you or put you down or anything like that but if I were to pick on something that maybe you didn’t do as well and you weren’t as descriptive as maybe you could have been but if there is one thing that I can kind of pick at that maybe you could have done a little bit better not relating to a date. As far as what to say, I think this podcast episode is too short to tell you exactly what to say on a date. Now, if you listen to my strategies or read anything on my website, you know that I’m a big fan of slowly building up attraction and the same applies with dating. It just depends on—I know some men out there get really keyed up and they show up a lot earlier. A tv show is an example there that I just used but maybe he has a movie, maybe—I know Game of Thrones is coming out soon which is we’re super pumped for.
But anyways, here’s some interesting things that I’ve learned and also that my wife can help you out because now my wife is working full time with the ex-recovery team and she’s specifically really good at things like make up and dressing things up. So, according to this, there are three types of colors that you want to wear on your first date. The second one is perfect if there was cheating involved, specifically if you cheating and, that’s Blue. And to put into perspective how big it is, the first Harry Potter book—The Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone was around 76,000 words. About 6 months ago, he told me he was unhappy and I found out he was having a long distance, kind of an emotional affair.
Like you know—a guy talks to someone at work and he constantly talks to this person at work and the guy talks to this woman so much at work that he starts to rely on her advice for situations instead of his wife perhaps.
A lot of the people who I determined didn’t use the no contact rule, I didn’t have enough information to determine what they used. You want your ex back and you mentioned that you put 5 years into this thing and you know, if you get him back, I’m assuming you want it to be more permanent in nature. There’s a lot of people, a lot of women who experienced this phenomenon that when they want their exes back they can’t get him back. But if you show the toddler the toy and then take it away from the toddler, what does the toddler want? It’s just one simple strategy but if you implement it correctly, it can do so many things for you and help you get your ex back.
Now, some experts out there will talk about the 60 day rule or the 90 day rule but I don’t like recommending that because of something called the habit theory. A lot of people have contacted me directly begging for a page like this so I took a lot of time to research and brainstorm a plan for getting an ex back in this specific circumstance. If handled incorrectly this negotiation (for the commuted) could cause a strain in your relationship.
She would text and he never responded to her but I think now he wants her back, how can I get him back. Not only is it a really cool quiz but you’re going to get so much value after you sign up for it.
But I don’t want to get into any political debates on what men earn versus what women earn. I could definitely buy into the fact that he was struggling with this career or trying to figure out his life path or what he should do for a career.
Believe it or not, even though what you did was stupid, I think it can serve a purpose for getting him back which I’ll cover in a second. You saw what I said about the no contact rule but how every time you do it after the first time it losses some effectiveness and that is certainly going to hold true but the good news for you is you really didn’t do it. Understand everything I teach about the value chain, about how you want to go from the no contact rule, to texting, to after you build attraction through texting, you move up to the phone calls then after you build attraction through the phone calls, you move up to the dates. I jotted those notes down and basically everything that anyone ever complained about is going to be going in the book. So, I don’t forget but yeah, we’re really excited to add more products to fray and I have to say, thank you guys for being so accepting of the newest additions to the ex boyfriend recovery team.
Build attraction with your ex through text messages and then of course build attraction through your ex through phone calls and eventually, once enough attraction has been build, the date should be easiest.
Of course I write about it in my products and everything like that but for whatever reason, I’ve just never covered that as much. I will give you a few pointers a little bit later but let’s talk about what kind of a template to work in because I always think people look better when they have an overall strategy. Imagine that you were about to go on a blind date with someone you’ve never met before and then on the blind date, that person asks you to marry him. Repeat it to where it’s every single date you go on from this point on after that third date is romantic and puts him in the mindset of wanting to ask you to be his girlfriend again but we’re getting way ahead.
Baby blue in particular—I know from my sales experience that Baby Blue is the most trusted color but Blue in general shows that you’re trustworthy and that you’re secure essentially. Just wanted to thank you for all of your support and how much you engage with the content that I write in ex-boyfriend recovery. So, just stay tuned for that because very soon, this book is going to go live and I know you want an opportunity to get it. At the same time, I also don’t think he has a lot of self-value or self-worth, if he’s saying he can’t fix himself or whatever he’s you know—whatever he’s saying there.
So, if he’s not willing to invest the time or do what it takes in the therapy to make it work—it’s really you can do everything right, there’s nothing you can do. Cheating, I had the second most success stories were in the cheating category which is shocking to me. It’s kind of impossible because you’re going to see them more than you see probably anyone throughout the day. The no contact rule itself makes it more difficult for him to get you back, assuming he wants to get you back. So, I think once he gets out there and experiences something new, he’s going to realize how good he had it with you and then potentially come back. A lot of people were just asking me, “What text should I send in this situation?” or, “What text should I send in that situation?” So, I wrote an entire book full of 250+ text messages to send in just about any situation I could think of. However, a lot of people aren’t like me when it comes to long distance relationships. These are all very important bonding moments in a relationships life and you could be missing out on them. So, when the time came to haggle over the price the car salesman and my dad went back and forth. It is important that YOU end it because it puts you in a position of power and will hopefully leave him wanting more. Basically by through hearing other people’s situations and figuring out what advice that I give to them that you can use for your situations. I would think, “Ok, we’ll she’s telling me that and I can understand why she did that but what if she’s just lying about this as well?” I mean this is the kind of headwind that you’re going to have to overcome if you’re going to try to get this particular ex boyfriend back. You did it for  a week and then basically got him back and then fumbled it up before you really got him back. What kind of hobbies can you pick up?  What kind of things have you always wanted to do but you never did? Well, he’s already going to be very insecure about you or you telling him and lying to him about sleeping with someone else. Just sort of, kind of, if you imagine a graph, it’s sort of like the graph is constantly going up if the graph were to represent attraction of course. I think that’s partly due to my laziness but it’s also partly due to no one really wants to hear about it because where people mostly struggle is in the first parts of the strategy with the no contact rule.
Where I would have a date set up and I would show up maybe 30 minutes early because I was just nervous about it but my point here is you’re trying to go on small date and the goal of this date is to interest him and make him want another date with you.
Because when you have him on that hook, when you have him hooked and you leave, you are putting yourself in a position where he’s going to want to see you again.
So, if you cheated or there was cheating involved, blue is definitely the color that you want to wear.
You will always get really good and insightful information from my podcast specifically about ex’s or just relationships in general and also please if you haven’t, write a review. Now, he contended that was not the reason, he—you know, was having doubts about our relationship. He’s probably around that age so, it’s possible he could be having sort of a midlife crisis type of a deal.
I mean you can certainly do things like limited contact and try your best to make it seem like you’re not going to talk to him but at some point you will have to communicate but since he moved out, there’s no better time for you to do the no contact rule. There’s not enough information for me to determine what they actually did to get their exes back. So, the more difficult you make it for him to get you back, the more he’s going to treat you like the queen you are once he gets you back. So, let’s assume that your ex wanted to get over you and you’re using the no contact rule on him and let’s say you’re using the no contact rule for 90 days.
In a LDR that just isn’t possible and as a result you are missing out on important bonding time that could further cement your relationship. They haggled and haggled and haggled until my dad determined that he wasn’t going to be getting the price he wanted. Its really upsetting and sad that she has moved onto someone else so quickly and I am unsure what to do.
Well when I finally seeked help she was already frustrated of being extremely happy or angry .
You said you wanted to know about what the appropriate time was to hash things out with him.
So, technically I think it’s going to lose a little bit of the effectiveness for your situation but not much. Seriously, you should go back into no contact rule and to the no contact rule even if you didn’t contact your ex but you didn’t make any personal strides, you should go back to the no contact rule. The first date should be real light, not threatening, but interesting enough to hold his attention to make him think about you. So, I went out and got someone who knows a lot about it, enough to get me to marry her, my wife.
And then finally, if you feel like you want to look slimmer or you feel that like Red looks terrible on you, –these are my wife’s words, I’m just summarizing from the email here I have pulled up in front of me.
That he was just an unhappy person and he was unable to fix himself in the context of our relationship. I mean often times when it comes to break ups and relationships, there’s no really one definitive reason for why a breakup occurs. Which is why I say, even though emotional affairs aren’t technically a form of cheating, they almost always lead to cheating if they’re not nipped in the bud.
They tied for the second most, with the exact same amount of successes with this cheating was, him moving on to someone new. So, that 74% number, you know the 74% of people who used the no contact rule, maybe something like 90% because the vast majority of situations who actually got back to me with details—I think actually all of them that got back to me, with enough details for me to determine like, okay what they did to get their exes back, all used the no contact rule. In other words, when you get your ex back using the no contact rule there’s scientific proof that it will help him stick around.
So, the no contact rule actually has scientific basis for having that happen which is why it’s one of the most incredible strategies out there because it accomplishes so much at once. Well, if he really wanted to get over you, it would only take him 66 days to get out of the habit of thinking about you and you don’t want that to happen.
So, if you haven’t done that already, I urge you to please do that and also, I do want to mention that we have a YouTube channel now.
I can’t tell you how proud I am because they pretty much respond to everyone who asks a question.
One of my best friends dated his girlfriend (long distance) for two years and they are still together today.
Although he was with his buddies he told me that he didn’t want to be disrespectful of being always on the phone.
Well she is talking bad stuff about me to this guy and of course he is telling her what she wants to hear because he wants her to be serious about him and I know the more I try to pull it pushes her towards him .
I wouldn't call it necessarily a newsletter but we completely revamped the emails that you get when you sign up for exboyfriend recovery. I wouldn’t call it necessarily a newsletter but we completely revamped the emails that you get when you sign up for exboyfriend recovery. We were kind of talking a while after the breakup and then I finally started no contact and within a week of us not speaking, he reached out to me asking if we could talk. You mentioned something about a quarter life crisis because he doesn’t know what he wants to do in a career which I’m not sure I buy a quarter life crisis thing.
To be honest the appropriate time is when he’s in an incredible mood, when he is in such a good mood that you can basically tell him that you murdered someone and he won’t get upset with you.
So, I was feeling really good about myself and I think my wife, she took the baby to her parent’s house to give me some kind of space to work and some peace and quiet to work basically. Usually I’m very secure about the projects I work on or in a specific area of my desktop where I don’t touch them or they sat there and everything. The second date should take things up a notch and on the third date of course should take things up a notch and then ideally by that third date enough attraction has been built through both where he’s re-evaluating whether or not he wants you to be his girlfriend and he’ll ask you. We’re using Starbucks as an example because I’ve been to Starbucks and I’d know exactly how this can work.
You’ll find he’ll text you more, he’ll think about you more, he’ll say nice things to you, he’ll say maybe I miss you and then you can go about setting up that second date; the medium date which I’m actually not going to talk about because I want to talk a little bit about what you should wear. I encourage you to write a review on Itunes for my podcast and that it’s going to do it for this week’s podcast of the exboyfriend recovery podcast episode. You want him to be constantly obsessed with you, constantly wondering why you’re not responding to his texts or constantly missing you but if you embark on one of this massive no contact rules—the 60 day rule or the 90 day rule, I think it’s getting a little too close and he could potentially move on from you. So, if you want to see in depth videos on how to get your ex back or search strategies of getting an ex back, I recommend you hop on over to the Chris Seiter, S-E-I-T-E-R YouTube channel and that’s going to do it for today. In the long run it might not work but I just don’t have alot of experience with this sort of thing and was just seeing if you were able to help me with ideas of getting hee back.
So I was upset that she is putting our business out to this guy and I confronted her about it . When you do this quiz, you basically get this set of emails that basically defines to your situation what kind of chance you have. And since we’re trying to create this—basically this community where we help people who are trying to get their ex back. You told him that you slept with someone else to hurt him which obviously it did and you find yourself back at square one. I mean I know they have midlife crises but just to put this to perspective, he’s 26 and I’m 26. I mean there’s nothing scarier than living life without a plan or without a financial plan to back you up.
And I did just that, I started working and I started particularly cleaning up my desktop.  I own an iMac and it’s really cluttered.
But here’s the thing, I was in a great mood that day, so even though, it was a horrible loss which I have since started rewriting the book and that I think it’s even better now than it was but even though it was a horrible loss, I didn’t really feel that upset inside because I was in such a good mood. So, I really think you really have a great chance of almost—even though you’re at square one. For you to make a major mistake like telling him that you slept with someone just proves that you are not ready to get him back.
Let’s say, it’s not a date, it’s just a hang out with one of your guy friends, Dave and you post a picture on Facebook and he comes across this.
Light texting after no contact, although he is very reserved but responding and when our last conversation went right, I asked if he has still had my old records that I lent him and he does and he agreed to meet up and give it back but yeah. So, once you get there early, go inside of Starbucks and then order a coffee or whatever the heck you want to order there, Frappucino, whatever. My wife and I last night, we had an interesting discussion about the bachelor of all things and how the bachelor almost glorifies cheating and how it’s socially acceptable for the bachelor or even the bachelorette to cheat and how it’s such a way of process.
Alright, but before I get into today’s situation which ironically is about the no contact rule. This will be truly the first book of its kind because most books in the no contact rule focus on the aspect of healing from a break up.
Anyway, it didn’t get better in therapy and two months ago he moved out saying he needed more space.
This is—you know emotional affairs, even though they’re technically not physically cheating. One that was my old computer that I first started ex-boyfriend recovery on and one that’s a new computer that when the old computer got a little slow, I upgraded to this new computer. Us as a couple I usually steal his clothes and I finally admitted that I took his soccer shorts and he just laughed about it. She got so angry that she said she doesn’t want to hear from me for awhile or else she will block me so of course I said ok and just hung up . So, he’s essentially your high school sweetheart and I could factor into all of this in a second but first let me get to your situation.
So, you’re big basic questions here are should you do the no contact rule again and what’s the appropriate time for you to hash things out regarding the issues in your previous relationship and what caused the breakup and things of that nature. So, I think I have a lot of great insight into what he’s thinking or he’s mindset and at 26 years old, I have not had a quarter life crisis though. And men really take that seriously, so I can buy into the fact that he feels a lot of stress about that but it’s not a quarter life crisis. So, just going forward, if I’m going to help you out, I need to know that you cannot do this again.
That’s how important it is to focus on yourself and a lot of women obsess about the no contact rule. So, a lot of women think, “Ok, will getting my ex back, I have to wait ‘til he’s ready.” But that’s not always the case, sometimes he can be ready and you’re not ready.
Well, all you’re going to be doing with that picture or that act is you’re going to be upsetting him to the point where he’s not going to want to be with you because he doesn’t feel like he can trust you.
So, I had testimonials that sporadically I had saved to my computer from, god, all the way since 2013.
But for you I think I’m going to recommend the 30 day no contact rule because there’s that aspect of the other girl and I think what needs to happen is he needs to kind of get a little bit of the grass is greener syndrome going on. I can’t guarantee we do in 24 hours but usually within 2 days, we get to you and you get a response. I put all of my work, all the pictures I do and any book I’m writing is on this desktop and  a few months ago I started rewriting ex boyfriend recovery pro which is kind of the flag ship product. I think maybe, we’re ready to get him back but you weren’t ready maturely wise to get him back.
The name of game here is getting him back but at the same time, showing him that you are the most trustworthy person alive.
Sit down at a Starbucks where there’s an open chair near you and then when he shows up, he will come inside Starbucks and then he will see you and then he’ll V-Line towards you and then you’re both sitting, he’ll give you your stuff and rather than asking, “Hey, let’s hang out after this.” You’ve already put him in this position where he’s going to hang out with you.
He told that the emotional affair was over but about two weeks ago it became obvious to me that he was still not in a romantic relationship but a sort of sexual affair with this woman. So, it could that he got kind of a taste of what attention from someone else other than you felt like. So, there weren’t a million of the testimonials but there were enough to where it was interesting enough for me to create a report.
Basically it states that the harder something is to get, or the harder something is to obtain, the more likely that person who obtained it or who have put the work in to obtain it, is going to cherish it once they have it. She said if I lived closer we could be together and she said that if you had come over and seen me earlier, things would be different, in a good way. I even got blocked a couple of times but after reading your advice I tried the no contact rule and made myself desirable again .
We’ve had the limits for some of our responses because I think over the Easter holiday, we had something like 400 unanswered emails. And within two weeks, I kind of prematurely agree to meet with him and we did and it went well. I mean if you’ve ever gone to sleep deprivation with a new baby, you know what I’m talking about.
You need to approach a situation where you bring up your previous relationship when he’s in an incredible mood.
Now, those are the three top recommended choices for what I think you should wear on the first date. Because you want him to look at you in that passionate way again but if you want to maybe be more creative, wear Purple. To try to find some co-relations between some of the things that people who succeed in getting their exes back are doing and some of the things that people who are failing are doing.
We fell asleep leaving the FaceTime on and he only hung up when it was already in the morning. She says she loves me and is always liking and commenting on my Facebook posts, even if she is seeing this guy.
So, we fell a bit behind which is why I actually came in and started helping out my—some of the other members of the ex-recovery staff in answering some of the emails. However, we’ve been—he then asked me if I have been with anyone else since the breakup and I lied and I said yes, just to hurt him and it did. People are going to be more accepting of bad news when they’re in a good mood as opposed to bad news when they’re in a bad mood. I took a lot of the complaints I got from people who bought the book and I’m working them in to make sure their complaints get covered and no one ever has an issue. I had broken a million of cardinal rules because I have been wanting to work things out and even though I know it seems crazy, I do want him to come home.
He moved out two months ago and it seems that this emotional affair with this other woman has turned sexual in nature. All you had to do was just build up an attraction and get him back but now that you made this mistake, you had the added headwind of making him trust you because even though you didn’t sleep with someone, if he truly believes that which is like I said, he’s going to question everything, you still lied to him. We had a life together and it’s been more than 5 years and I’m just wondering if I’ve already done too much damage? And you’re wondering if you should use the no contact rule because you’ve broken a lot of the cardinal rules so far. Don’t obsess about anything relating to your situation and I promise things will go better for you. Do I ask if we hang out for a little bit or you know, I’m definitely going to be very chill and nice and positive when I see him, not bring up any heavy memories.
He seems very remorseful and tied to me still but is this the good start—like is this a good start for the no contact rule or has sort of—too much damage had been done? I know you say it’s less effective the more times you do it and also when is the appropriate time to kind of hash things out and talk about the issues that cause the breakup in the first place? It does and it makes people not trust others.  So, kind of the big thing that you’re going to have to accomplish here is getting him to trust you again and the best way to do that is not to put yourself in a position where you’re around other guys. Talk about something that you know will interest him and then end the date prematurely on purpose. She wants me part of her life but she wants to date other guys because she still doesn’t trust me .
And I know she dates guys to try and forget me because she said in the past even though she talked bad about me the guys were tired of hearing about me . Make it to where—it’s not getting back into ways—I mean a lot of women try to get their exes back—the biggest mistake I see a lot of women trying to get their ex back too soon.
He doesn’t have a lot of self-value or he kind of got some attention from someone else and wanted to gravitate more towards that. That you really didn’t sleep with someone and then after you’ve given that apology, you go into the no contact rule.




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Category: What Can I Do To Get My Ex Back



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