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For many of us, Valentine’s Day is a time for candlelight dinners, champagne, and romantic gifts to express our undying passion for our loved ones. If you follow these 14 steps, we guarantee you’ll be cozied up to your boo’s pecs by Valentine’s Day (hope you don’t know our office address). Prove to them you’re smart enough to also get into Lagos Business School, then surprise them on campus. Wear a costume to a non-costume party they’re attending to prove how GOSH DARN FUN you are. But for some of us, Valentine’s Day is a time of composing and re-composing bizarre love letters to people who had no idea we were stalking them, or obsessing about the one who left us over a year ago,  by pounding a 12 pack of Pabst Blue Ribbon while playing video games with our dorky friends who are still virgins at twenty-six. What do all your friends (who universally agree that you’re a total freakin’ loser whose lost one of your only hopes for salvation) know about it, right?


First up, if you want to keep it classy and send roses, don’t send red or white ones. She was lying when she said she thought it was cute that you were trying to look like Wolverine from X-Men. She would love it if your band actually made enough money to buy beachfront property in LA, but she’s really tired of hanging out in smelly dive bars in Wisconsin listening to the same 10 songs.
We chose the $150, 000 thirteen carat version because anything less probably won’t work in your case.
The classic old man tighty-whiteys pictured here are only about a dollar a piece, which is cheaper than having a beer. There’s something just plain WRONG about choosing a PlayStation over sex with a woman.


First of all, although roses are a beautiful flower, pink ones are somehow just, I don’t know, PINK.
And second, the second rate beauty of a pink roses makes it MUCH easier for a woman to chuck over a hundred dollars’ worth of flowers in the wastebin, which is almost certainly where the majority of pink roses end up.




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Category: How To Get Ur Ex Gf Back



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