But it was The Ragbag who pointed out that this rule has a duality: for the date to be socially acceptable, the rule must be adhered to by your date as well.
Hey David, I am, to say the least intrigued with your info and would like permission to put your graph on my site and see what kind of response I get. A number of the online dating sites interview women in their 30's who are comfortable with being approached by men who are 15-20 years older than them.
It just so happens that Christian Rudder released his book Dataclysm last week, which features a chart showing us the age range that men search on OkCupid for when looking for women to date.
Sure enough, if we overlay Rudder’s OkCupid data over the first chart, we see that men follow the rule almost exactly.
Another interesting trend is how men aren’t even close to reaching the upper bound of the zone of non-creepiness.
AGE is just a number, if you look into it anymore than that you discount EVERYTHING that makes us human. This is talking about what age people seek for, there is limited time and it makes sense to seek for people who are closer to your age as there is a higher chance you will connect.
Sweetie, that may be your hint either up your standards if you are decent looking or just go back to hiding under your bed curled up in the fetal position as your pick of men is just very limited…which may be a good thing.
This is a perfect example of how female-identified voices are regularly attacked online merely for expressing an opinion. Anonymous intimidation techniques, both pictorial and verbal, are indicative of the pathetic weakness of those who have neither the capacity to make a real contribution to the discussion nor the emotional maturity to realize that they should just STFU and concentrate on the talent they do have (for every one of us has some talent, however tiny and sad). Young men, especially the ones who consider themselves the best catches, have a sense of entitlement to rival that of Wall Street (and, of course, the overlap between the two on the Venn diagram is populated by the worst of the worst).
I advise you to grow up and realize that you may actually get a date if you follow in the footsteps of your betters and develop some circumspection and self-awareness. I think some people don’t get that you are just reporting the facts, no whether you think it is right or not. Anecdotally, I’ve believed this to be true (just like the guy generally being taller than the girl).
There is a hidden downside for the woman I was unaware of before marrying: when we meet new people, they sometimes assume I am a trophy wife (common in our area and industry) until they find out what I do and my background.


I always noticed on okcupid that guys are looking for a younger female and girls are usually looking for a little bit older guys. No offence,Mike,but if you looked like me-I’m a year older than you-busty young babes would approach YOU,as they frequently hit on me!!!!! About this blog This blog is my labor of love, and I've spent hundreds of hours working on the projects that you'll read about here. If you would like to use one of my graphs on your website or in a publication, please feel free to do so with appropriate attribution, but I would appreciate it if you email me first to let me know.
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One of my first thoughts when I saw this chart was: Do men on OkCupid follow the Standard Creepiness Rule? It was another 8 years before we were officially not creepy, and by that point we’d already been married for a year.
Some girls like older men, some men like younger women (and the reverse happens as well, of course).
There is nothing creepy about guys getting dates with other women, dispite the age difference. I have found that I get all ages of men thinking that they are an appropriate age for me, and I think it’s creepy. I know girls who have dated and eventually married guys 10-15 years older than them and been perfectly happy.
They start at 20 and end at 50 because that’s the age range that OkCupid has reliable data for.
Other than a hilariously misdirected and content-free ad hominem attack, you have contributed nothing to the discussion. This is a regular occurrence for women on all sorts of platforms, not just dating sites and not just when the subject is sex or gender relations. Ask yourself if your immature attitudes are making you more or less attractive and you may figure out why women who keep rejecting you.
It can be a bit frustrating but the schadenfreude when they embarrass themselves is usually worth it.


Tony Randall aside, most 61-year-old men have either already bred or aren’t interested in starting so late. As a divorced guy that’s 42 with 3 kids (oldest is 20), I never understood the younger female thing.
Generally, I write about data visualization and machine learning, and sometimes explore out-of-the-box projects at the intersection of the two.
Just because you, as a man, do not agree with it, maybe you should check with your female friends.
They see it as being with someone more financially secure than your average mid-20s guy tends to be. The creepiness rule applies to dating only because the process is one of finding fault in order to winnow the population.
As men grow past the 30s, the floor starts to raise up because no man wants to deal with the drama of younger women even though they are typically more mature for their age. Nothing more disturbing than being a young and attractive 25 year old with an ugly 35 year old thinking he deserves you. Meaning, for example, 24-year-old women on OKCupid generally are receptive to 34-year-old men.
If you know someone and fall in love, things like age and gender are irrelevant – you just want to add him or her into your life. Given this stark reality, it should surprise exactly no one that women approach dating online with a mixture of caution, frustration and disgust. But long term, younger girls will probably want to have kids eventuall if they dont have a bunch already. Moore's research lab, he studies biologically-inspired AI and its applications to biomedical problems.



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