Problem is, your feelings for him and what your relationship could be or should be are just an illusion.
It’s amazing how quickly a man will get his act together when he believes he might lose his shot at something. 2)  He knows he can put up a front and the new girl will buy it… at least, for a while. As romantic as all that sounds, it actually damages your chances for success in actually starting something. Hollywood loves to spread this idea that if someone rejects you, you should just push harder and harder and harder and suddenly, some magic event will happen and you’ll end up together. It can actually be one of the greatest lessons to learn to truly let a crush go and accept just being friends. It might be tough, but if you add gravity to the situation or romanticize it or dramatize it, it will be 100 times tougher. I know some of you in the audience are about to throw something at me and scream, “Why should **I** have to change for him? Of course, you could just decide to give up and find another guy that appreciates you exactly as you are. Master your makeup.  Makeup is one of the greatest advantages women have over men in terms of massively increasing their attractiveness with minimal effort. I almost feel evil for saying it, but for some guys just seeing that he might lose his shot with a girl can be all he needs to snap to attention and reconsider his feelings for you… lest he should lose you to some other guy. Thankyou soooo much Eric, What a wonderful article, full of wisdom as is all your articles. I am moving on with my life, going out, planning a 5 week holiday, focusing on what makes me happy, keeping fit and enjoying life. I know as much as I feel for this man and would love him to commit to me, It is time to move on and whatever the outcome may be, I know I will be ok….
If you really boil down what I talk about across my articles, I say to be open to a relationship, but don’t wait around trying to get a guy to commit to you.
So at present the short story is that I dated this guy for about four months, then we did more of the friends with benefits as he was going through some major life changes, now he has moved six hours away and again is in a place of transition… I believe in our connection yet I am uncertain how to continue a relationship with him.
Ok, so I like a guy from my class, but he doesn’t really JUST hang out with some people. I always thought myself as a man trapped in a womans body, after reading this article I had to laugh because this is exactly what I was telling one of my girlfriends, I’ve never had a problem with attracting guys.
But the majority of the time, these relationships always morph into something else, something more intimate. It is amazing how we can be friends with a man, share a great deal of lives with him, feel totally comfortable and have fun with him, and never see him as a mate! I’m not yet engaged, but my boyfriend and I have been together for 7 years and we were friends before we started dating for about 2 years! Whether it's dragging them to a strip club or making them feel guilty for not hanging out more, our boyfriends' buddies have a big reputation for being bad influences.
I didn't trust my ex, but I trust my boyfriend, and yes it's who his friends are that counts. So It all depends on the guy (you should trust your man and if you dont, maybe he shouldnt be your man) and it depends on his friends. They would probably end up being the ones giving him some kind of ultimatum in the end if he ever did do something wrong out of fear I'd kill them ALL if I ever found out about it. My guy's friends are pretty nice guys, and I can't really imagine them convincing him to do anything awful. Most of the time, my boyfriends friends put him on track, and have better ideas than he does. I trust my guy with his friends, even though two of them aren't exactly what you'd call an 'upstanding boyfriend example'. If someone tries to pressure my BF into doing something he gets so irritated he will generally do the exact opposite of what they want him to do. I know this because he does it to me, too :) It's irritates me occasionally, but I would rather date a guy with a mind of his own than someone who is afraid to say NO for fear of not being cool or whatever.
I had an ex that blamed all of his bad behavior on his friends, it was always somehow their fault. I remember when my husband and I were still dating and his friend was in town from Arizona and he said to my (then) bf that he should come out to visit him and they could go to Vegas. It happens to guys and it happens to girls and oftentimes, it can cause more heartbreak than an actual breakup.


Damaged goods:  There are some great guys out there that have had their heart broken one to many times. The reality of relationships is that for them to move forward, they need to deepen over time. But the dazzling new Cleopatra that stepped into the picture is a blank canvas – he can paint her up to be anything he wants to imagine that she is in his mind. It’s better I give you a straight-up reality check because reality can be pretty cold when it comes to this kind of thing. There is nothing attractive about a woman who is fidgeting with her outfit constantly or one who looks uncomfortable.
He actually doesn’t seem interested in even being in a relationship any time soon with anyone, but still, our mutual friends and family already see us as a couple.
There was this girl that I met and known for 6 months now because we were two of three winners for a music competition. I was wondering if this applies to a guy who is my best friend with benefits as well but I want to get out of the friend zone?
I think our mental wavelengths match perfectly and he’ll just b unhappy wid that girl…how do i keep my sanity ?
Now that I do and living with him without much other place to go right now I don’t know what to do or say… I find what you had written helpful for some cases but what could someone do with my living conditions? From proposal ideas to the perfect ring, couples preparing for their wedding engagement need to look no further than right here. We can feel certain that our boyfriends are the most honest and good-natured people, but put them in a room full of their guy friends and suddenly they’re one of the pack.
I always say if you can't trust them to hang out with there guy friends, how can you trust them at all? I knew I could trust him with his friend and had no problem with him hanging out with them.
In fact, with the little time he spends actually going somewhere with other people, I'd greatly encourage him to engage in some healthy boy fun. However, I've gotten to know his friends and know the worst they'll get him to do is get drunk and sing Toby Keith at karaoke night at the campus pub. And part of deepening a relationship is knowing the other person more and more deeply and gaining a fuller understanding of who they are.
The sooner that you can accept that guys respond to the physical appearance of women, the sooner you can use it to your advantage. We hang out quite often, but he likes to hang out with other people as well, including girls, which makes me kinda anxious. I have a crush on a work friend and we have spent time together outside of work and enjoy each others company.
I kept it short but there was never a period of “no contact” is there any way for me to reverse that? I don’t know how to tell him and I kinda had a chance to go out with him last year and I got scared and said no.
And it sucks because sometimes when some other girl makes him laugh or something it makes me feel weird.
But on the other hand, building a relationship out of friendship won’t only be easier on the both of you, but also might encourage a more laid-back approach to the way you two communicate.
Aside from your big day, popping the question is one of the most monumental moments in your relationship. From the few times where he did go out and get a little drunk with the guys, I got calls at 3-4am with the sweetest and cutest things he'd never say to me sober, so I'm all for him going out more haha! However, what sealed the deal happened a few weeks ago when one messaged me and told me I had to come home NOW because the BF was being whiny and sucky and no fun. It implies that you have a desperate need to have it, like it’s the only possible nourishment for your starving heart. I know he likes me, but I am just tired of waiting (6 months already) for him to be single. We were heavily dating and everything was going very smoothly, on the same page as far as what we both wanted etc. But after a while he started dating other girls and I found myself feeling jealous about it even though I never showed interest in him.
I love that we know eachother’s family and can talk about the past and laugh about it!
I have to imagine the sting is just as bad for a girl when she hears that message from a guy friend she has feelings for.


Well, on the 5th of February 2016 my boyfriend broke up wi th me because he lost feelings or his exact words,”I have been thinking this for 2 months now and I come to it that I lost feelings for you.
If he says he’s interested in going out with you tell him you are concerned and ask him what subjects he likes to talk about. Only when I am interested in a girl than I will date her and be interested to find out more about her.
All they did was party (clubbing, having certain types of parties are their houses, etc) and a lot of them were not faithful. If a guy is going to be so pea brained about it and lose interest than that’s their problem. I’ve felt like this for two years now and my other best friend found out that I like this guy and she is encouraging me to ask him out. At the same time I am coming to the end of 2 years of grieving for my late husband of 30 years (therefore having done a lot of letting go on many levels). I had just messed up on my pills!) a few days went by and he was being weird and distant then said he wasn’t ready for a relationship and completely cut me out of his life. And often those kinds of guys have like 2 days when they are all about you and then crush on another girl, or tease another girl, and then all I can say is, move on.
For female friends, I will be engaged in them and I have some close female friends but we have never dated; maybe lunch or dinner to catch up and I have never considered such appointments as dates.
If you like someone why does it have to be a game when you could both figure out you want to be together much sooner?
I am confused as to whether i am trying to fill a void or i have fallen in love again, but I am now at the point of starting with exercise and diet program, making new friends, planning trips and as you say focusing on activities that i enjoy. Since I am a mom,he had already met my kids (as my friend), my youngest really took a liking to him so that was my major reasoning for staying friends.
I know it’s risky but, I really want to work things out with him such as give me a second chance to rebuild his feelings for me. When I try not responding, I feel rude because he responds to me almost immediately after I text.
I sent a text to him on accident and he got jealous and pretty much said he doesn’t like to share and that he was turned off now because he thought I was sleeping with other guys.
LOL So It all depends on the guy (you should trust your man and if you dont, maybe he shouldnt be your man) and it depends on his friends.
A couple months later he said he felt like he was holding me back and we should be friends but nothing will really change. I really don’t think he is going to take me back if he has been thinking about it for 2 months in our relationship. We still hang out a couple times a week, he texts me everyday and worries if I don’t respond. Such as yesterday I did my best and not contact him and starting working out and just get my mind off the break up.
Later that day, I saw him in person (since we all have the same friends) he was surprised how happy I was to see him and how I actually went running (he knows I hate running) and I acted as myself. He does go out of his way to help me when I need help but that’s just his personality. He is going on a date this weekend but always tries to talk like nothing is ever going to come from his dates.
He is 10 yrs older than me and I think that’s one of his major concerns since he brings it up a lot. But, I did call him telling him how I truly felt because I didn’t want him to think I was ignoring him or begging or chasing him.
I just told him,”Carl, it is going to be hard for me but, Im trying to get over the break up. I know you want me to be happy without you, but, everyone (our friends) keep telling me you are going to come back I just have to wait. I know I have to wait alittle longer to actually find out but, that’s just how I feel.
But, now that we know our differences I wanted to learn how to fix my mistakes for the better of myself and hopefully if you do take me back I really want you to see that if you give me time for myself to recover I can make you happy.
Is there any way I can get him to see the age difference won’t matter and get back out of the friend zone?



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Comments to «How to find out if a guy friend likes you»

  1. O1O writes:
    Not it, then it is an individual else and if you never like.
  2. K_A_T_A_N_C_H_I_K writes:
    Takes to make being deeply hurt by the breakup.