I went to a great workshop the other night called Putting the Fun & Romance Back into your Marriage. My dad has always told us that the best way to show love to your children, is to love their mother. As a mom, it is really easy to focus on my kids (who are very demanding of my time and attention), but at the end of a long day sometimes the last thing I want to do is then shift gears to talk to anyone else- even if that other person is my spouse. The workshop was a great reminder of things that I can (and should) be doing daily to make my marriage thrive.
Spending time with your spouse doesn't mean you have to go out or spend money, but it does mean that you plan specific things to do together that allow you to build on your relationship as a couple.
I want my kids to have amazing marriages and I want them to be successful in their relationships with friends. PS- Do you think my husband is going to kill me for posting this photo of us at the top of this post?
Thank you, Dale, for acknowledging a few very common truths from the world of online dating.
Now you’re going to get the same song and dance as every other guy who has written to complain about women on the Internet. Understand, Dale, there is nothing wrong with you being attracted to a fertile and youthful woman in her 30’s.
I hate spam as much as you do, therefore I will never sell, rent, or give away your email address. If everyone is looking downstream, age-wise (except the few who have a “kink” for older types), where does that leave those of us who really are looking for a peer? Do yourself a favor and don’t let the older man not enter the dating picture with you.
Other than the obvious of younger people being seen as more beautiful and vibrant, there is a major reason why men prefer younger women at any age. I actually had plenty of older, successful men interested in me throughout my years of dating, but they didn’t interest me beyond a few dates. So no, not all women prize money over everything – I am testament to that, as are my friends.
So if you have superficial criteria for dating, please don’t project that on to the rest of us. I have found by discussing this with nearly every guy I know that men for the most part ARE attracted to women who are younger. Also, I would note that on most of the online dating sites, most women are doing one of three things.
What I will say first is that I have been talking with women both in South America, such as Brazil, and also women in the Orient. Both women from South America and he Orient tell me that they notice a huge lack of respect for men when they come here. So should it really come as a surprise that more and more men are turning to other countries? I don’t have any issues with woman having power, but it seems you have a problem with men still having power. I really am not bothered by what anyone here thinks because I know what my own life is like. You may get it but it seems most do not and most here seem to be deluding themselves as to the reality. It seems to me you give out solid advice, at least most of the time…solid enough that any woman who chooses to learn from it should be able to solve her problems with men, because in all likelihood, her problems have more to do with her default attitude toward men. As the old saying goes, keep doing what you are doing, and you will continue to get the same results. Rusty a lot more women are going for younger men because those men are fit and look much better than men your age and over.
I am 57 almost 58 belong to a gym work out everyday DO NOT NEED VIAGRA and my wife tells me I am sexually satisfying in every way!
Priya you sound very self-centered wait till you get older then maybe you will respect older men!
Yes, it is just your personal opinion, and not one shared by myself, or other women I personally know who will date men up to 12, maybe 15 years older. Little did we know on that last Sunday in October of 1993 God was about to set us on a journey of preparation for the hard work ahead of us. It never occurred to us that our marriage might need some construction work in order to strengthen the infrastructure and make it strong enough to withstand some major storms that were on the horizon; I think it’s probably good that we didn’t know.
I also think that many of these reminders allow us as parents to help teach our children so many important things- such an unselfishness, kindness, and dedication. As a couple I think it is awesome if you can start over with a clean slate each day and recommit yourself to making your marriage fabulous. Sit down with your spouse and ask, "What can I do for you to make you feel loved?" Have your spouse ask you the same question.


Be a role model for your children of the type of partner they have the potential to become. If everyone tries to give 50% in marriage, but someone fails on that again and again, then you're never at 100%.
How does a 56 year old man find a good younger woman that would be interested in marriage and willing to have children by him? You’re done with the bar scene and you’re very much interested in settling down to have a family of your own. You get BOMBARDED by emails from fifty and sixty something Baby Boomers looking to trade up in the world. If you truly listen to what most women tell you they want in a man, regardless of age, they want financial security.
Women today are abandoning their roles as house wifes and want to be like men, thanks to the feminist movement.
Those words were spoken to me following a church service where our pastor was speaking on the topic of marriage.
We were headed into the second decade of our marriage with two children in our home and another on the way. Our search for a church put us in a place where a young man our age (hey it was 20 years ago, we really were young back then!) passionately preached the word of God and taught us to view all that was going on in our lives through the Biblical lens of the Word of God.
Little did we know that all those tears that were shed that brought us to the doors of that church were simply being used to soften the soil of our souls and get us ready for the work that was about to commence in every area of our lives. But here’s the thing, if we are willing to be trained by it, if we don’t give up and throw in the towel, if we trust God even if we don’t understand, there is a huge benefit. Marrying her high school sweetheart in 1983 has resulted in a home filled with five great kids, a wonderful son-in-law, AND an adorable grandson! I would love to hear your tips regarding how you work to make your marriage thrive in the comments below, so definitely share them! This requires letting go of grudges and forgiving and forgetting (and not bringing up sore subjects over and over again).
I think there are definitely seasons of life when we are busier or more tired as parents, so scheduling a date is hard. Everyone has a different love language, so talking with your spouse about this can't help but yield positive results. I notice that when I focus on the positive things my spouse does, I am happier, and then my kids are happier too.
On Saturday night we went on an amazing date that my friend created and it was such a fun change from the norm.
My husband knows this and so we usually spend time together doing dishes on Sunday nights (when kids are occupied or asleep). Sometimes as a spouse I am selfish of my "alone" time or even silly things (like my treats), because I get tired of sharing with just one more person. One thing that our workshop mentioned is that marital problems are sometimes signals that a couple needs to learn new skills to create a happy relationship. You double check your profile to see if there’s something you wrote that’s attracting these older men.
We’re all so dazzled by looks and youth that we pass up amazing people who are a much better fit. I do know, however, that as long as they close their minds to dating people who are age-appropriate, they’re really going to struggle with online dating. Instead of searching through hundreds of thirtysomething women who wouldn’t give you a second look, Reverse Match shows you who IS open to dating a 56-year-old man. I think the record so far is the 74-year-old who said he could have his daughter pick him up at the nursing home and bring him into the city if I were willing to meet for coffee. Not only financial security today but they want someone that projects the possiblitly of even more financial security in the future. I have been the breadwinner throughout our relationship and when times were economically tough she would be unpleasant and demanding. Also any man looking for foreign women usually find them in developig countries- as in they (the women)  are desperate and need that golden ticket to the US. God was at work, even when it didn’t make any sense; perhaps especially when it didn’t make any sense. In marriage, in parenting, in finances, in relationships, in hard times, in boring times, in frustrating times, in anxious times, if we can just keep our focus on the fact that God is at work, He loves us, is for us, and will be our strength in the midst of hard work. I actually love routine, but I also think the idea of trying new things together helps keep things fun. Life has been going, going, going with lots of work travel for my husband so connecting has been challenging to say the least.
At least you know that a woman on MillionaireMatch might be more willing to sacrifice youth for security.
Even women of significant means rarely get involved with men who have less financial resources than they do.


I was treated like a possession that had to deliver her lifestyle needs and loving attention or else. I prefer to find a guy who has a decent job and career who can be a good friend and partner. You definitely need a wake up call you probably date a guy in his 30’s that takes you for granted do not knock us older guys we know how to treat women right! Honestly, I don’t remember ever saying those words to him but they are true, a successful marriage is hard work. Up to then we had been coasting through marriage, perhaps even coasting through life – taking it as it came, reacting to the loudest call, responding when necessary, ignoring what we could and not being proactive about many things, too many things.
If we have a bad day, we talk about how tomorrow we're going to have a do-over and make things better the next day. We really have a good time catching up with one another and then we start off the new week with a clean kitchen. My husband has been amazingly unselfish this year and has watched our kids while I've gone on three different girls trips. There are some weeks when we just go through the motions and are like passing ships in the night with busy schedules.
Older men are a lot calmer and have more patience where as the guys my age expect everything to be instant! About a year ago I met a very attractive and intelligent 22 year old woman at work who sought me for the financial security I could provide. Chances are a guy like that is close to my age and we are in the same place in life facing similar challenges. I have to resist the urge to bring up past events and instead focus on the positive things ahead!
My favorite thing to do with my husband is to sit at the kitchen table while he makes us a late night treat- carmelitas or peanut butter bars. Working together as a couple also reminds me how important it is for us to work together with our kids. Leaving nice notes in shoes, buying each other special treats, or even just sending a sweet text during the day are simple ways to still be nurturing your relationship during those times that are crazy or tough!
One thing I try to do is to always kiss my husband before we go to sleep, when we wake up and when one of us is leaving the house. Yet these men keep on writing – talking about how they’re young for their age, how they’d love to have children, how they have everything in life except a good younger woman.
This does not mean that you’re not a great guy with a ton to give and the purest intentions. He says, if I have to financially support all these women I may date or marry it, I might as well get something out of it. Of course, in my dating adventures I always come across much younger guys who are very attractive and I will dally with them for a little while before going back to my search for Mr. We knew it was time for us to leave when a conference pastor challenged us on our belief of whether the Bible was true, every word. I am always amazed at how much better of a parenting team we are when we have 1:1 time together to just have fun together (and eat our treats). Help can come from a therapist, another couple you trust, supportive parents, or other resources like marriage classes and books. We always hug, especially in front of the children, which is important especially when there might not be a lot of energy and time for much more than that gesture! Now I am seeking a young partner who does not take me for granted and appreciates what I have to offer. We fully believe that if the Bible said it happened then, even if we couldn’t understand how or why, it happened. I think this teaches our kids that each member of our family is important and deserves special attention. Recognizing that you need help and being willing to ask for it is a great skill to demonstrate to your kids. Finding ourselves at an impasse with leadership we had the choice to stay and fight for what we believed or leave and find a church that taught what we believed. But, no less shallow than the majority of women expecting men to provide their financial freedom rather than being happy earning it themselves, and marrying and otherwise great guy.
I’m sure many would say easy, when it came to fight or flight we fled; but in reality leaving looks a lot easier than it really is. It doesn’t stop older men from writing, but at least you don’t have to explain yourself to a man who doesn’t want to hear your perfectly valid explanation.



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Comments to «How to meet a good man to marry me»

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  3. centlmen writes:
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