I read somewhere once that the secret of long (and happy?) marriages was that the people involved “never fell out of love at the same time”.
We’ve been married almost ten years, known each other for over 20 years and we’re both not sure we want to be married anymore. I know I’ve changed, grown, and wanted more from our relationship than I’ve ever asked for in the past. I’m a woman of a certain vintage; yes, I’ve just turned 40, but I’m not convinced this is as simple as the traditional mid-life crisis. We’ve both been in a comfort-zone of sorts, where neither of us has questioned or articulated our deeply felt beliefs on what our marriage is, should be or could be. Maybe we’re both too damn selfish to put our child before our own happiness but if that’s the case, what are we teaching him? That it’s okay to suffer in silence rather than ask for what you want and need in your primary relationship?
What I do know is that we all get one life and it’s too short to spend denying reality and being unhappy.
And this isn’t just happening in one or two small parts of the world, it’s happening in countries across Asia, Africa and the Middle East. We are lucky enough (thanks to you guys!) to have a large following both here on the blog and on social media. When UNICEF approached us last year about working on a social media campaign about ending child marriage, we knew it was the perfect fit. So now, weeks on from the launch of our #endchildmarriage campaign, which saw the powerful video above go viral across the world (thanks once again, to you guys!) we wanted to share more ways to help with, and spread the word about, child marriage.
Because for us, this isn’t about one viral campaign, blog post, or page view, this is about an ongoing effort to end these dangerous, destructive, and disturbing marriages forever. Your wedding day is a happy occasion, that should be all about you, your other half, and your guests. Donate to UNICEF or any other organisation that helps fight child marriage (see a list below). Include our video, a link to a donate page, or simply information on child marriage on your wedding website, to help spread the message with your guests. Theas Wedding Blog – This campaign by Plan International in Norway was a haunting account of planning a wedding as a child bride.
Please share our campaign on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter, and remember to use the tag #endchildmarriage! None of our efforts would have been possible without the incredibly talented and generous vendors below.
As same-sex marriage gains a foothold, some progressives argue that the legal institution itself should be abolished.
The ceremony took place on June 17, one day after a landmark decision by the state Supreme Court went into effect overturning California’s same-sex marriage ban and establishing the fundamental right of gay and lesbian couples to marry under state law.
Gay marriage still has a long way to go in this country—only California and Massachusetts now permit it, and marriage protection acts have passed in state after state. Mason Gaffney ’48 and Estelle Lau, Stuart’s father and mother, celebrate with Stuart, John, and John's father, William Lewis, after the ceremony. Child marriage is a dangerous practise that affects 15 million girls every year, so we joined UNICEF to do something about it, and spread awareness to brides, grooms and the wider wedding community.
30 million views on Facebook, four million views on YouTube, 75,000 views on Instagram, tweets from as far as Australia, Ethiopia, Canada, India, Ireland, Afghanistan, Tanzania and Mongolia, coverage on the Daily Mail, A Plus, AJ+ and Mashable and shares from The Huffington Post, Ashton Kutcher and George Takei.
Visit our new End Child Marriage resource page for more information on how you can help end child marriage (and use your wedding to do good!). And now that the dust has settled a bit, we wanted to take a moment to thank all the incredible vendors who so generously gave their time, talents, space and products to our campaign and share a closer look at the details behind this unique shoot.
When you’re creating a project around something so sensitive, it can be tricky to get people on board.


Even we were reluctant at first, because as much as we wanted to join up with UNICEF on the issue of child marriage, we were worried we might strike the wrong tone or create something that would jar with our readers. But as we assembled this crack team of talented wedding vendors, our confidence grew and grew, because not only did we know we were creating something important, but something that would resonate with people around the world. We had a feeling on the day that we were capturing something pretty special, but when the pictures came back, we were blown away by how beautiful, poignant and powerful they were. The stationery was beautifully designed by Kate Ruth Romey, who didn’t flinch at our odd requests for a wedding menu that had chicken nuggets and jelly and ice-cream! Her bespoke paper goods really are so unique for each couple she works with, so be sure to check out her site. Room after room, each space is so grand and elegantly decorated, while the grounds around it are equally enchanting (and we were there on a dull day in November!). A truly romantic place to get married (and just outside London too!), the light-soaked bridal suite is perhaps our favourite part of this amazing place.
There were severeal wonderful decor vendors who helped us create the classic, elegant look of our shoot, from the breezy chiffon chair covers with embellished ties to the smart floral arch that was the backdrop for our powerful reveal. It’s not every day the groom of the piece isn’t supposed to come across as a dashing hero! But even though our groom was a faceless figure, it was still so important that he looked the part, and this three piece navy suit by Alexandra Wood Bespoke was smart, sharp, and the perfect fit. An award-winning Saville Row tailor, we were so thrilled to have Alexandra Wood on hand at the shoot. The wonderful Karen of Rock the Frock Bridal was tasked with dressing our bride, which is no easy ask when the requirements are a wedding dress to fit a child, without her looking like a flower girl! But with this gorgeous vintage dress (it’s actually a tea length dress for an adult) we found something timeless and classic, with beautiful lace and a pretty bow. Rock the Frock is a lovely store brimming with gorgeous gowns, both vintage and vintage-inspired, from some of our very favourite designers.
With a background in art and design, her cakes are feats of creativity, skill and engineering, the things she can do with sponge and icing is pretty incredible!
While we haven’t named them, to protect their privacy, we have to extend our massive gratitude to our two models for this shoot.
With subject matter that was so sensitive and distressing, this was not the easiest of assignments, and it took a lot of trust and bravery for each of them to take part.
And last but most certainly not least, the video, which got over four million views on YouTube, and was shared by millions on Facebook, all over the world. This pair are visionaries when it comes to capturing weddings, and they work with some of the coolest couples around, and jet off to the most epic locations to party with them. It was such an honour to work with them on this campaign, and as you can see when you hit play below, the results were pretty evocative. Finally of course, we must thank Nic and the social media team at UNICEF for helping us along the way, and for their mammoth effort in making our campaign go viral. We’ve been unable to go along, get along or be able to make life better for each other for over a year now. The line between compromising, tolerating and making do with a situation that makes us both unhappy, in the hope of creating a new normal for our family, one that we can both live with and thrive in. He’s not pleased with my asking and has gone from making this My Problem to acknowledging the unhappiness that has been festering for the past few years. And while we love to inspire and advise couples throughout their wedding planning, we wanted to use our reach for some greater good as well. This could be a percentage of monetary gifts you receive or by making a donation on behalf of your guests in lieu of favours. Brides Do Good is a website that sells pre-loved designer wedding dresses, you get one third of the profits, and a third goes towards programmes working to end child marriage.
The power of awareness is not something that can be underestimated with an issue as important as this one.


Work with responsible organisations (see below), with sustainable volunteering programs and use your time and skills to help end child marriage, whether it’s through education, empowerment, fundraising or awareness. John Lewis, 49, promised Stuart Gaffney, 45, to love and comfort him, to honor and keep him, in sickness and in health, for richer and for poorer, for better or for worse, and to be faithful to him as long as they both might live. At the federal level, there seems little likelihood that Congress will enact legislation favoring gay marriage, or even civil unions, anytime soon.
Although only 51 percent of American adults are currently married, 72 percent have been married at least once.It's not clear from the analysis whether Americans are shunning marriage altogether or simply delaying it, although the proportion of never-married American adults has increased from 15 percent in 1960 to 28 percent today. It was about making this a cause we continue to champion by keeping up the conversation about child marriage, spreading the word and making change. Claire is an insanely talented wedding photographer in both digital and film, and we just knew her delicate, light, and airy style would be the perfect fit for this shoot.
She took our concept to another level, and the moment we told her about what we wanted to do, she had so many ideas. Even on the most busy shoot day, with the most unsettling subject matter, we could all do nothing but stand back and marvel at the beauty of Nonsuch Mansion. We went to visit them at UN HQ in New York when we were over for Bridal Fashion Week last October, and let’s just say a UN boardroom is just as cool as an NYC fashion show! Each and every person who read, watched or shared our campaign, you guys gave it legs, and we cannot thank you enough!
Real Bride Diary: Having No Bridesmaids & My Thoughts on Wedding Traditions Romantic Pink Wedding with a Touch of Rock 'n' Roll Cool Southern Wedding with Urban Vibes and Luxe Blooms Real Bride Diary: Why is Choosing a Wedding Photographer So Hard! Age at first marriage is on the rise in a number of nations across the globe, particularly in developed nations.
Meanwhile, there is a growing consensus among mainstream legal scholars that gay marriage will win the day in the long run. Census data, conducted by the Pew Research Center, also finds that the number of new marriages per year declined 5 percent between 2009 and 2010, a drop that might be related to the economy. The proportion of divorced or separated people, on the other hand, has leveled off at around 14 percent of American adults over the last two decades.Race, class and marriageMarriage rates diverge notably by race and class, the analysis revealed, meshing with earlier research by the University of Virginia's National Marriage Project, which finds that working-class and poor individuals are increasingly retreating from institutions like marriage and church. Among whites, 55 percent are married, compared with 28 percent of Hispanics and 31 percent of blacks.
Part of the difference has to do with the fact that the black and Hispanic population skews younger, and thus they are less likely to have gotten around to marriage yet, Pew researchers found.A college education is also linked to the likelihood of marriage, with 64 percent of college grads having entered into matrimony. For those with some college education, that number is 48 percent, dropping to 47 percent among those with a high-school education or less.
In 1960, these education disparities in marriage did not exist.Public opinionAccording to the Pew report, cohabitating, single-parent and other types of households have increased as marriage has become less common. A 2010 survey by the organization found that 39 percent of Americans say that marriage is becoming obsolete. In the 1970s, only 28 percent of Americans thought marriage was obsolete.Public opinion about marriage mirrors marriage rates.
About 44 percent of blacks say marriage is becoming obsolete, compared with 36 percent of whites.
Of adults with college degrees, only 27 percent say marriage is fading in importance, compared with 45 percent of adults with a high-school education or less. Nonetheless, 47 percent of unmarried people who said marriage was obsolete also said they hoped to marry someday, virtually the same proportion of unmarried people who believe that marriage is important.



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