Darryl: I was just trying to make sure you knew that even though it would be my sperm, it was our child. 1846 – The Donner Party of pioneers departs Springfield, Illinois, for California, on what will become a year-long journey of hardship, cannibalism, and survival. 1894 – Thomas Edison demonstrates the kinetoscope, a device for peep-show viewing using photographs that flip in sequence, a precursor to movies. 1940 – Royal Marines land in Namsos, Norway in preparation for a larger force to arrive two days later (WWII). When questioned with the allegations, Seagal squinted and then attacked reporters using only his forearms. When reached for comment, Winehouse’s ex-husband Blake Civil-Fielder nodded impassively and then continued vomiting into an open manhole.
As the three loyal readers of our site may have noticed, we have pretty much dropped the ball of late on posting. But now is not the time for finger-pointing or name-calling (especially you, Blue Menu, you lederhosen-wearing disappointment to Mankind). Employee: Because you seemed hungry three minutes ago, when you told me you wanted to order a sub. Well, FIFA finally released their much-anticipated 2010 world rankings last week and Canada once again demonstrated its global soccer dominance, ranking slightly behind no. In anticipation of the release of the rankings, I had intended to write a post challenging the athletic prowess of all nations that were (dubiously) ranked ahead of Canada. IAAF officials haven’t yet released the results of her gender testing, but I think the anagram tells the whole story: Caster Semenya = Creates Semen? If he were truly a psychic, then why didn’t he use his powers to go back in time and prevent the invention of the television so that the radical clerics never would have heard about his heretical predictions? DISCLAIMER: In the event that you are inexplicably confused by our site, this is parody (poorly executed, but parody nonetheless).
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Quiznos's mini restaurants include this one inside a convenience store in Highlands Ranch, Colo. The Quiznos sandwich chain, known for its hot-from-the-oven creations, is making a big push to offer convenience-store patrons an alternative to the usual microwaved fare. Popular, international sub sandwich chain Quiznos remains as an ideal place to gain entry-level employment. Through aggressive franchising efforts employed during the late 1990s and early 2000s, the restaurant operates in most major metropolitan areas throughout the United States. Potential associates must meet the fast food minimum age standard of 16 in order to gain employment with the sub sandwich chain. Restaurant Crew Member – An entry-level job title, crew member positions involve the responsibilities of greeting customers, operating cash registers, and preparing food. Delivery Driver – Basic team members often take on the responsibility of delivering orders to customers offsite.
Management – Base pay for Quiznos managers begins around $10.00 an hour and rises to more than $35,000 in annual salary for general managers. The Quizno’s restaurant chain continues to expand and regularly hires on new help to staff stores and combat industry turnover. A majority of Quizno’s hire on new workers quickly, with proceedings lasting only a single day in some cases. Quiznos employee benefits include fun, energetic, team-oriented work environments, paid training, complimentary uniforms, and discounted or free meals, depending on location.
Committed to quality, fresh menu options, the sub sandwich chain imposes strict ethical sourcing practices when purchasing from suppliers. Quiznos, the sandwich franchise, announced Wednesday the appointment of Kenneth Cutshaw as the company's new president of International expansion. Cutshaw resume includes working as the executive vice president and chief legal officer of Cajun Operating Company based in Atlanta, where he was responsible for the global expansion of Church's and Texas Chicken Brands as well as the management of legal affairs. Have you ever been involved in a dispute that you just can’t let go of, even when it makes you look like a raving maniac to those around you? The franchisee complied, and had the worker put on new gloves.  The franchisee stated, though, that next time he would not honor such a request.
Upset that the franchisee had questioned her (even though the salad was completed as she requested,  the customer demanded her money back. Initially, we thought this was a mildly entertaining story that illustrated how both sides of a dispute can blow things out of proportion, and cause each other unnecessary aggravation and damage. This now appears to us to be a story about how much abuse foodservice franchise owners must take from the occasional Customer-From-Hell.

Our sympathies go out to the Lenexa, KS Quiznos franchise owner who bent over backwards to please a rude and demanding customer, only to have his best efforts (literally) thrown back in his face, to be criticized on the Internet, and to have the police called on him.
Hopefully the woman will file her civil lawsuit to try to recover $6.53 plus punitive damages, and the laughter and publicity it generates will bring him much business and sympathy in the future. I searched the customer’s name (which I’ve withheld), and learned that she’s a highly educated woman-of-color who has a government job and also owns a small business. If a white business executive with a Rolex and expensive suit had asked for a fresh pair of gloves, would the franchisee have refused and told him he unreasonable?
At the same time, we know that Quiznos owners are highly stressed, with a parent company in financial distress and thousands of fellow franchisees having lost their investments, savings and some their houses. Don’t consumers care that coupons, discount prices and freebies are forcing local small business owners into bankruptcy? The customer is so incensed that she will waste hours writing long, passionate diatribes (see below) about an obviously (to everyone but her) trivial incident. While she has every right to have Visa reverse the charge on her card, her threat of a civil suit (with punitive damages) over a $6.53 salad is, at best, silly. The franchisee could have said: “Be assured that we always do everything we can to provide a clean prep area.
The customer could have shown respect for the franchisee’s business by offering extra payment for extra service. The franchisee could have shown respect for the customer and prepared her salad the way she wanted it, and probably gained a customer for life. Food preparer:  I placed an order (to go) for a large Cobb Salad and politely asked the Hispanic food preparer if she didn’t mind putting on a new pair of gloves before making the salad.
Short man:      “We practice the highest standards of cleanliness and she just put on those gloves. Unless, of course, you have another rare disease in your family medical history that causes snoring to sound like pleas to be saved from Biff from Back to the Future.
Are you praying for a natural disaster to hit your area in the hopes that it will get you a day off work? But something clearly happened while you were in that bathroom that satiated your appetite. Now, I didn’t see you bring anything in with you so, this being a Quiznos, odds are it was a sub. Also, you live your life for one special day each year – the release of the FIFA World Rankings. That, however, would now involve significant time and effort, and I am a very lazy man (and frankly not much of a man at all). Canada was once again beaten by a collection of banana republics (including the clothing store) and quasi-nation states that will not likely exist by the time the World Cup rolls around… Vive le Canada.
As consumers have gotten busier and thriftier amid the recession, they have been increasing their visits to convenience stores while reducing their visits to restaurants.
Now, the much smaller Quiznos, with more than 4,000 restaurants in North America, is jumping in with plans to sign up convenience-store locations at the same clip it opens traditional stores for the next several years.
The restaurant incorporates fresh ingredients, fast services, and original menu items to draw consistent patronage to more than 2,100 locations worldwide.
Associates take responsibility for cleaning and sanitizing the restaurants in order to comply with government and corporate health and safety standards. Other desired qualities include the ability to work open schedules and personal enjoyment of fast-paced job settings.
Across the country, many locations that offer delivery services hire on workers exclusively to process and deliver food and drink, as well. Due to assembly line customer service and the chain’s widespread popularity, the sandwich shop regularly requires individuals to work quickly and efficiently at all times. The nationwide restaurant chain also provides job benefits packages to full-time crew members. The company corporate office sponsors and maintains a Supplier Code of Conduct, which potential suppliers must meet in order to do business with the successful franchise. We have recently inked new development deals in Brazil to build nearly 150 restaurants, unveiled new locations in Asuncion, Paraguay, Mumbai, India and Manila, Philippines, and opened our fifth restaurant in the Dominican Republic which generated more than $26,000 in opening week sales," said Stuart Mathis, chief executive officer, Quiznos in a statement. It seems likely that, as a woman and member of a minority group, she has worked extra hard to achieve success and feels that she has the right to be treated respectfully when she is the customer.
Quiznos franchisees are stressed about their thin profit margins, which have been strained by pressure from “dollar menu” competitors and a parent company that jacks up the products it sells to them, then advertises buy-one-get-one-free deals and “Million Sub Giveaway” promotions that eat up what little remains of their profits. Her overdramatization of the franchisee’s bad behavior (“outrageous and nefarious misconduct,” “theft, malice and reckless behavior,” “he is a thief; he stole my money, and caused public humiliation and embarrassment”) does not further her reputation as a emotionally balanced professional. Not only did he lose future revenue from a valuable customer over a few pennies, he created a lot of negative buzz about his store that will surely spread in the future.

The other 99.9% of updates, however, are deserving of a precision bludgeoning with a table leg.
At the risk of being unpopular, I place the blame for this lapse squarely on you, the reader. The perverse humour arising from this message being delivered by moms to other moms instead of by husbands or children is absolutely delicious. I have had just about enough of your holier-than-thou attitude and your constant exports of sorghum, pearl millet, maize, peanuts, rice and cotton. Restaurant visits began slowing in 2007 and then fell 3% last year while trips to convenience stores to buy food have been increasing at a year-over-year rate of 1% since 2007, according to the NPD Group. In order to gain hiring consideration, applicants must possess reliable transportation, stand at least 18-years old, and demonstrate effective time-management skills during the hiring process. Job hopefuls with experience in the fast food industry should highlight related or similar experiences on applications to show a strong fit for positions desired. Submitting employment materials online or in person usually results in similar time tables. Franchising and career status may affect the type of work benefits offered to eligible associates; however, full-time jobs regularly provide medical, dental, vision, and life insurance options, flexible spending accounts, profit sharing plans, 401(k) retirement plans, employee assistance programs, and vacation time.
Both corporate-owned and franchised locations must always adhere to the Supplier Code of Conduct, which includes certain, established criterion in terms of fair practices, safe handling of goods, sanitary factory or warehouse conditions, and ethical food harvesting methods. He sent a negative message to his staff that not only is the customer NOT always right, but it’s fine to tell them so to their face. She made eye contact with a short, white man, who had brown hair, a light beard and who appeared to be in his early fifties. I hope this woman, her now-barren vagina, and her shattered ego and low self-esteem collectively tumble into a grain thresher.  I BET YOU MISS ME NOW! What, do you think I just googled Benin because I otherwise knew nothing about your country? Each restaurant provides dozens of employment options offering competitive base pay and access to work benefits packages.
Food preparation remains an integral part of all roles in some form, including morning food tray prep or actual assembly of sandwiches and other menu items for customers during business hours.
Individuals with excellent navigation skills and familiarity with surrounding areas also regularly outperform other candidates for delivery driver jobs. Both positions involve entry-level food prep and customer service work in addition to hiring and training new associates, completing payroll, scheduling, and inventory tracking. Excellent personal hygiene, open schedules, and a love of working with the general public also tends to work in the favor of those applying. Associates also gain valuable communications skills through regular interactions with customers. Applicants who exercise diligence, attention to detail, and courteous, professional behavior represent ideal fits for jobs available. If no communication between applicants and managers occurs within 48 hours, job hopefuls should reach out to desired locations and inquire about their current statuses. I JUST GOT SHREDDED IN AN EXTRAORDINARY AND PHENOMENAL FASHION BEFITTING MY BEAUTY AND TALENT!
Most positions require working under deadlines and involve food preparation responsibilities, which may interest individuals looking for long-lasting careers in the culinary arts.
The store operators, which become Quiznos franchisees, bear the cost of remodeling their buildings to accommodate the restaurant, with its ovens and, in some cases, small seating areas.
Franchisees pay privately held Quiznos an annual royalty fee of 7% of the restaurant's sales and make a yearly advertising-fund contribution amounting to an additional 4% of sales. But if the franchise is well run, it can be a way to draw traffic to the convenience store and boost margins.
Filling stations only make about a 6% margin on gasoline sales—a number that can be as low as 2% after credit-card fees are assessed—while fresh food and beverages can ring up margins of more than 50%, according to Mr. Quiznos says its convenience-store locations generate almost double the sales per square foot of traditional Quzinos. The company projects that all of its convenience-store restaurants will generate a total of $250 million in sales by the end of 2012.

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