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If you have ever wondered what makes men happy in marriage, we have the answers for you here today!
What an honor and delight to have Marriage & Family Counselor and Superstar Blogger, Aaron Anderson sharing his insights with us. I have recruited the hubby to share his views from time to time to bring the masculine energy and wisdom to our soulful conversations. All the love songs, movies and books out there are about a man wooing a woman trying to win over her affections. But even though men may want to be loved and cared for, they want to be shown it differently than women.
And despite what the Superbowl ads would lead you to believe, most men don’t feel close to women while drinking beer and watching them dance in bikinis, either.
So how do men want to feel loved and what can wives do to show their husbands that they care?
Men want a woman who is fiercely independent, who has her own desires, goals, drives and plans how to achieve them.
Men absolutely love it when their wives are in tune with them enough to know when they’ve had a bad day and need to be left alone and when they’ve had a bad day and need someone to talk to about it.
Wives often fill their day with so many things with the kids, that when night time comes and it is just the two of them together, the wife has spent all her energy on the children and has none left for her husband.


She forgets what’s going on at his work, what his friends are doing or how his latest hobby is going – but she can probably say exactly what score their oldest got on their spelling test or what boy their daughter likes. Men love it when their wives plan a date for the weekend to go a comedy club or a restaurant and then out for drinks afterwards. Instead of their spouse criticizing them and pointing out flaws (which makes men feel their relationship is on dangerous ground), men want a wife who will be patient with him when he feels challenged by his shortcomings. A man likes to know that his wife won’t take advantage of his shortcomings and will keep his insecurities safe while he’s working on them. Even though men get a bad reputation for being the least romantic of the two sexes, they still like romance. They also want to feel like they’re safe in their relationship with a partner who loves them and is invested in them.
Aaron Anderson a Licensed Marriage Counselor and owner of The Marriage and Family Clinic in Denver, CO. Reaching across the magical ethers from Miami to Colorado to give Aaron a big hug and thanks for this thoughtful and generous view of what makes men happy in marriage. And if that seems like a big question listen to this free podcast where we go deep into how to connect with your spouse when you are not on the same page and create a “communication highway” for the free flow of both easy and delicate topics. Posted on: November 7, 2013 8 Comments Filed Under: Healthy Relationships, Marriage AdviceLove this post? My wife used to carry all my crap in her purse, my glasses, nail clippers, stevia, nail file, etc. Thank you Maggie for helping us focus on what is working in our marriages and how we might do more to open a greater space for love to grow – you are truly serving the world! I help Smart, Soulful, Successful women (just like you!) have healthier, happier, sexier marriages using simple tools I share on the blog and in my personalized coaching programs.
After years working on the HR side of luxury hospitality, I realized, 5 star hotels are fabulous, but 5 star marriages are even better!
Plus regular bursts of soul-filled, love-soaked inspiration + VIP access to our classes and coaching programs. As a site run by a woman and written for women, I am endlessly curious about the male side of things.
I am so thrilled to add to our male voices with this heartfelt guest post where Aaron tells us the truth about what men really want out of marriage. Thanks to our hunter-gatherer ancestors, somehow men got stuck with a bad reputation when it comes to romance.


But times have changed and men don’t need to protect against wild predators who are trying to eat their families anymore.
Men don’t want to be taken to a good chick flick or watch a movie that makes them cry to feel close to their spouse. Men like that their wives need them but not to the point that their wife relies on them for every small thing – this feels smothering.
They like a wife who can accomplish her goals on her own (and will) but invites her husband to do things with her because it means more when he’s there. They may not ask for help when they’re working around the house, but they like to feel like their wife takes care of them everywhere else. Just like women like to be taken out on dates by their husband to be romanced and wooed, men also like to be taken out on dates. The fact that their wife took the time to plan something they thought their husband would like is a good enough feeling that men often don’t care what they do as long as their wife planned it and thought of their husband in the mean time. And a man especially wants to feel like his wife is supportive of him in his challenges and isn’t using his challenges as reasons to walk away.
Underneath is a person who wants to be cared for, loved and take care of just as much as you do. In addition to counseling, he is also a writer for various blogs and websites all related to marriage and families.
By practicing these 5 tips, we not only create a deeper love and appreciation in our marriage, we are providing the best of role models for our children. So underneath their calloused ‘nothing bothers me’ exterior, what do men really want in a relationship? Men want a woman who doesn’t need them but she asks for him to be in her life because she wants him. He is on the Board of Directors of The Colorado Association of Marriage and Family Therapists and is the editor for the Marriage Section of the Good Men Project. You can get his great information about marriage on his Facebook page, by following him on twitter or on his blog the Relationship Rx.



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