Okay, let’s agree for a minute that there are fat guys around who have to walk with those extra bellies everyday either because of over-eating or alcohol habits or because of some hormonal problems.
I’ll never forget the days of being an innocent teen girl who viewed the world through rose colored glasses. I learned very quickly that there are some solid Christian guys who would make for great husbands, and some who would not.
I realized through personal experience (and observation of other relationships) that there are 6 types of guys I would never consider marrying (unless he had some serious life change occur). There isn’t time to settle for a guy out of hopelessness, desperation or just plain emotional want. Here are the 6 types of guys I personally would never recommend for you to date, court, or marry. When a guy’s life, time, passions, energies, and thoughts revolve around you, you’ve got a problem.
If you’ve ever felt pressured by a group of friends (or by anyone) to do something you didn’t want to do, you understand this guy.
Hey Rebekah, I am so encouraged to hear that you know young men who do not fall under the 6 categories. I am so thankful for your comments, because I really feel that the information shared apply to both Men and Women.
Jared Dudley did what was known as the ESPN car wash today, where he makes appearances on SportsCenter, First Take, The Herd, His And Hers and probably Highly Questionable. The Milwaukee Bucks forward enjoyed some moderate success in this past NBA postseason, but he let off the chopper when he was asked about his opinion about many NBA stories. He didn’t mince words when he was asked about Kobe Bryant, and why nobody wants to play with him.
He also mentioned Carmelo Anthony when he was asked who was the most overrated player in the NBA as well as calling Zach Randolph the most underrated.
Two summers ago, when I moved to Portland, the last thing I wanted to do was become a high school youth ministry leader. Regardless of the fact that I had no job, very few friends, and a ton of free time, I found plenty of excuses.
Not five minutes after I unequivocally declined my friend’s offer, something wormed its way into my mind and would not leave: A vision of myself in high school.
Over the course of two years as a youth leader I did many many things that I did not want to do. Mostly I learned to depend on God for all those times when I just wanted to stay home, be lazy, avoid responsibility, and give up completely on something that was so good and worthy.
In hindsight, that thing I tried to weasel out of has proven to be a profound blessing, one that continues to bear fruit in my life, refine my character, humble, and surprise me.
Because without fear we would never know the great, awe-inspiring relief and gratitude that comes with relying on God to help us do something that absolutely would not or could not be done without Him.
Despite all of my tendencies towards reluctance, lethargy, and trepidation, opportunities for change and challenge continue to appear in my life. Enter your email address to subscribe to the Unitive and receive notifications of new posts by email.
Believe it or not, they too are humans and get extremely offended when someone makes fun of them or asks them anything about their bellies.


I assumed the best of most everyone and figured a guy who claimed to be a Christian, had good manners, and was interested in me, must be a solid catch. We as christian girls should constantly comparing our lives to Scripture and striving to become more like Jesus. It’s so nice to read your posts…they always refresh my commitments and convictions! Another idea is to ask yourself if YOU are any of these… Miss Talk, Miss Anger, Miss Struggle, etc.
Prayerfully seek the man the Lord has for you and get to know them before giving your heart or pieces of it or your flesh to anyone.
If we’re Miss Talk, Miss Anger, Miss Struggle, Miss Obsessed, Miss Pressure, or Miss Unsaved, we shoild be seeking the Lord to renew and change our heart and attitudes first before we start seeking a man to court, date, marry. It’s just as important to be preparing ourselves to be wives as it is to be on the look out for men with these qualities. So much of the time, if the guy’s not number 6, we think there’s no reason not to be involved, but that is so untrue! Sometimes it seems soooooo hard to wait, but I’m trying to trust His timing and leadership.
He also speaks on Kevin Love being pretty silly to leave Cleveland to join the Los Angeles Lakers. He's also a regular on MTV2's "Uncommon Sense With Charlamagne" and has been featured on BET, VH1, Complex, Essence and Revolt.
It takes effort and self-control, and we all know that doing just about anything opens up the possibility of failure. That could be this entire post, if not for the stunning moments in my life when I have pushed past the voice in my head that screams, “I don’t wanna!” Those moments have inevitably been the most memorable and meaningful times in my life. A dear, wise friend asked if I would be willing to go on the church’s annual rafting trip, and I literally laughed in his face. I’d suffered from shyness, anxiety, insecurity, loneliness, and had been fairly certain that life would always look pretty much the same until a friend invited me to her church youth group. It was a worthy thing, meaningful and important not just in a worldly sense, but an eternal one. For anyone who has done any amount of self reflection, it seems obvious to say that overcoming fear is a path to discovery.
This is when I know I have to ask God to push me instead of letting “I don’t wanna” be the end of the story. She studied literature and creative writing in Los Angeles, perfected her latte art skills in Fort Worth, and taught English with the Peace Corps, in Bulgaria, before finding her home in Portland, Oregon. Even though we hadn’t a relationship yet, he claimed me (#2) and tried to make me spend the time with him (#5).
That must have been a very hard situation for you and I’m glad to see that you are no longer with him. I don’t want to brush my teeth before bed, and I never want to take a shower in the morning. They are the times when I have felt God’s blessing most fully, and have begun to understand this idea that maybe God has rewards laid out for us on a path where all we can see is pain and struggle.


He calmly appealed, explaining that without more leaders they would not be able to drive all the kids to the campground. To my immense surprise, this group of peers welcomed me, brought me out of my shell, treated me with love, showed me a super fun time, and pointed me on a path that ultimately led me to God.
I stood at one end of a crowded gym, squealing like a helpless baby squirrel, while dodge balls whizzed past my face.
We all need help discerning the things in this world that are good and worthy and prosperous to God’s kingdom, but that’s just the beginning. She's a youth leader and volunteer at Imago Dei Community, a runner, knitter, food philosopher, and comedy nerd. People feel like they have to walk on eggshells around him because you never know what might tick him off. Despite how flattering it may feel to be the apple of his eye, you have to realize that this guy has placed his desires for love and romance above God. Though on the other hand in past if any guy around my age was being friendly, I would get incredibly nervous.
That memory alone, still warm in my heart, of my first introduction to God’s unfailing love was enough to break through my wall of excuses. I tried and failed to illicit a lively spiritual discussion from a group of tight-lipped teenagers staring blankly at their shoes. If you’re like me, you need the most help just taking that first step, pushing forward in something that makes you uncomfortable and afraid, not knowing where you’ll end up on the journey, trusting only that it will bring you closer to God. I prayed, asking God to push me toward taking that first step because I certainly wasn’t willing to do it myself.
He’s in no position to lead a wife (much less children) until he finds freedom from this struggle. He’s putting his feelings, emotions and desires on the front row and using you to fulfil them. You need to see firsthand that he is taking steps toward overcoming those struggles and actually see progress in those areas before moving forward. Because I was a little mad at him (he laught at me), he told me he didn’t want anything to do with me anymore.
I huddled around a picnic table with a group of girls as one after another shared a piece of their own personal struggle, and we all shed a tear, squeezed each other’s hands tighter, and whispered prayers of encouragement. People, even the best, will eventually let you down, hurt you and you must rely on your faith and relationship with your Heavenly Father to be enough. I examined my own faith and strived to know God’s character more fully; I had to if I was going to answer to a bunch of inquiring teenagers.
I will visit your place sometime soon so that you could give me more suggestions on how to look smarter.



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