07.12.2013

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We talk about everybody else exploiting black people for their own financial gain…and talk ill of drug dealers and con artists.
Where I’m from you’re not allowed to call yourself an “expert” unless you had something to prop up that claim. First, one must question if the advice given with respect to relationships is actually being used to help. The fact of the matter is, a large group of women are being targeted and made to feel unworthy. I didn’t even know something as simple as appropriate tampon usage…but I’m pretty sure I could convince some women that I have the answers as to why, as women, they haven’t been able to find a man. I’ve directed an awful lot of attention to the menfolk, but I’d be remiss if I didn’t target the women behind this as well.
There are a lot of women who are out there peddling this advice when their own credentials turn out to be counterfeit under the light. These women are smiling in your face with their hands in your pocket, preying on your insecurities. The woman, who’s every word you’re hanging onto, may be unqualified to give you their opinion.
In conclusion, I said all that to say, I love black women and I just want the best for ya’ll. RealGoesRight is a freelance writer, law graduate and lover of all things Jay-Z and Radiohead. There are so many sisters who are so desperate to have someone to love them they will do everything I the world to get it. Its funny because they all boil down to the same thing, you're single because your expectations are too high or too low. I've found in my lifetime most of the questions that people ask, if they use their God-given commonsense they can usually answer their own questions.
I think people 2nd guess themselves way too much and don't have enough faith in their own knowledge of whats best for them. What gives really concerns me the most is the types of things people seek advice about and the questions they ask.
My advice to people is to become more Independent Thinkers and learn to solve their own problems without so much outside influence.
So for the women who constantly seek this type of advice, I wish them much more confidence in their decision making, and using their heads more than their hearts. One of the universal truths of a great relationship is that the partners involved are able to communicate with one another. But so often, when we sit down to talk about these things, it turns into an issue that we brought it up in the first place and rather than solving problems, more are created.
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As you've gotten older, have you noticed that you often find yourself marching around the house in a huff, searching for misplaced car keys or eyeglasses, or you just cannot remember the name of that new neighbor you met when walking the dog?


The way you live, what you eat and drink, and how you treat your body can affect your memory just as much as your physical health and well-being. If you're having the occasional twinge of joint pain when you go for a walk or climb stairs, or you're worried about arthritis because a parent had it, one step toward prevention is to check your weight. Watching the sugar in your diet can help you control your weight and potentially avoid serious chronic health problems — for example, heart disease and diabetes. The body systems responsible for balance can be affected by gradual changes due to aging or side effects of medications.
If a growth or mole looks like a melanoma, the doctor will take a biopsy to confirm the diagnosis.
Alzheimer's disease is characterized by progressive damage to nerve cells and their connections. It might seem like retirement is a time to take it easy and devote yourself to gardening, golfing, and napping. What if men approached their health at midlife the same way that financial experts advise them to plan for retirement? Sleep shortfalls can lead to a range of health problems, from being more likely to catch a cold or gain weight to increased risk of developing heart disease or diabetes. A couple days prior to this tweet, I was made aware of an event offering relationship advice for women going on in the northeast. We say nada when ya’ll giving up all this money to regular Twitter fools calling themselves relationship experts. These people are giving advice and can’t show you any training to back up what their talking about…why are we allowing them to call themselves experts? I don’t have a problem with blogs whose purpose it is to encourage dialog between men and women. It’s making said women susceptible to think doing whatever a man says will make them good enough to be “chosen” by a mate.
From my understanding, a lot of the male relationship writers are simply vessels for the people they write for. Broken and bitter women offering “sista-girl” advice to help other women “avoid the same mistakes” they made. The road to hell was paved with good intentions, so while some of these men and women “mean well,” you may want to be careful about propping them up to be more knowledgeable than you.
He’s just here to write things which he believes will make a difference in the lives of the people who will read it. She grew up in the house with a real live daddy who was actively involved in not just her life, but the lives of all of us who spent time there regularly.
People who can't effectively problem-solve on their own pay someone to solve their problems for them.
People who have nobody to go to and guide them and help them out with their life issues so they have to pay somebody to do it. Even some people who pay for pyschotherapy don't really need it as badly as they think they do.
The questions people ask on these shows and the advice that they seek are things they should already know the answer to?
The cosmetics (not pretty enough), anti-aging (not young enough), diet (not thin enough), and relationship (not desirable enough) industries all focus much more on women than men, with both women and men as the perpetrators. Make sure you’re in a relationship where you can talk about your problems with someone who cares enough to listen, empathize and change… or at least make an effort to.


Approach these conversations from the perspective of,hey, I really care about you, and I care about what we have together, so I’d like to share with you some things that are bothering me so we can talk about it.Not argue about it, not ignore the problem, but talk it through.
The environment for these conversations must be a) neutral, b) private and c) when neither of you are angry. By neutral I mean don’t talk about these things in your parent’s house where they could possibly overhear and your significant other feels obligated to act one way or another because, for God’s sake, you’re visiting your parents. I don’t remember the exact topic of the panel at the event, but it had something to do with what men from women…and they were charging $15 a ticket. All I have to do is make up something fancy and call myself a relationship expert…and I can get PAID.
I also don’t have a problem with blogs that are trying to shed some light on the inner workings (not bodily functions) of the sexes.
The biggest culprit of this uses God to get these women to pay $50 a class to learn how to be a wife. I literally stopped talking to her during the entire craze because I couldn’t understand why a woman who had an entire husband for a year prior to the release of that nonsense needed to think like a man.
What do you think mags like Essence, Cosmopolitan have been thriving on…plus makeup, fashion, etc.
It's simply people not trusting their self knowledge and thinking other sources have better answers and know more.
Plain and simple: if you aren’t with someone who cares enough to work on things, you’re wasting your time. You have to make sure you communicate that you are not attacking this person, rather you care enough about them to deal with the discomfort of talking about the things that aren’t so perfect between you.
Originally women started listening to men about relationships because they wanted to understand men’s actions and thought process, but now the focus has become ( like the author said) men trying to tell women how to be women. Still though, even in therapy sessions that I've sat in on and interviewed therapist about, the issues many people bring to therapist are things people can work out on their own if they put more time and energy into it. Part of maturation is being able to make those decisions on your own and believe in them and being confident in them once you've made them. When a couple fails to communicate and solve the problems in their relationships, they need relationship counseling, which shows the way to understand each other well and recognize well, what is causing a troubled relationship.
This requires two people who are willing to lay it all on the line, be vulnerable, and actually listen to one another. Lastly, and probably most obviously, nothing good comes of a conversation where one or both of you enter fuming. Why does it always end up having gossip and ratchet info mixed in with so called uplifting stuff. Just like someone posted about a woman who grew up with a dad in the house saying AFTER she read Steve's book NOW she understands????? I have debunked the myth that its a shortage in men as I have never had any issues with men. Overall some stuff is fun to read but you have to want to better yourself for you not to attain a man.



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