13.02.2016

No contact ex boyfriend back,how to get ex boyfriend back after 2 years 50gb,im back with my ex boyfriend - PDF Books

So what’s the  no contact rule all about and why is it an important step in getting your ex back? The importance of the no contact rule is paramount, and you’ll get an inkling of just how this step in the get your ex back strategy will be vital to your success.
Feelings don’t just disappear over night, and if you were the one who was broken up with, you can use this fact to your advantage. You have to become rational again, get over the breakup, and get your emotions under control and your head back on straight. The real only difference is if you were the one who was dumped your ex’s ego, pride and confidence wont be bruised.
These actions of constantly chasing them and fighting with your ex will only do one thing, and that’s push them even further away.
You will not be around as a backup plan to catch their fall if the grass isn’t greener on the other side. Nevertheless, this time of no communication with your ex just doesn’t give her the needed space and time. No contact allows you time to get your power back, and to free yourself from the power your ex has over you. Do you think the best way to win your ex back is to be bitter, angry and frustrated at them? Do you really believe that chasing and constantly harassing them will get you on your ex’s good side? These are just a few reasons pertaining to the importance of the no contact rule after a breakup. Saving this book is important just in case you need to go back and re-read important information you may have forgotten. Getting an ex back is no one magical tactic or text message or letter or thing you can do that will make them come running back to you. Visit the link back to the homepage and get my free ebook about what to do during the no contact rule. I have talked a lot about the no contact rule on this website yet I have never really written an in-depth guide covering it. I guess I want to start off by saying that this guide is going to be very unique in that I have never quite written anything like it before for this website.
Well, this website is called Ex Girlfriend Recovery meaning that it is mostly focused on helping men get their ex girlfriends back (or even helping them get over their ex girlfriends.) Thus, all of the pages on this website up until this point have been applicable to men attempting to get their ex girlfriends back. The reason that this guide is unique is that the no contact rule is a universal rule that can be used by both men and women. Of course, this site is made for men so there will always be a bias towards situations in which a man is trying to win his ex girlfriend back but if you are a woman who somehow ended up on this page please don’t be scared away because of the bias. No, often times you have to reconnect with them after no contact, re-build trust, re-build attraction and go on a few dates before they are ready to re-commit to you.Do You Even Have a Chance of Getting Your Ex Back?
If you are curious as to how this entire process of winning an ex back works then I highly recommend you read up on it through Ex Girlfriend Recovery PRO. I find that every expert out there has a different definition for how they define the no contact rule.
All kidding aside, my definition of the no contact rule has actually changed from when I first started my little online project of helping men and women get back with their exes a few years ago. I am the owner and operator of two websites that help men and women get back with their exes, Ex Boyfriend Recovery and Ex Girlfriend Recovery. I am a firm believer that in order for people to take your advice you have to prove to them that you know a thing or two about what you are talking about so there are my credentials for you as to why you should listen to me on the no contact rule over my peers. The No Contact Rule- A specific period of time where you ignore your ex in every form imaginable. Now, I would like to break the definition above up into two different sections so I can help you understand what a real NC rule is. Above I pointed out that I have seen the no contact rule used a lot from men and women just like you.
Yes, there are some idiots out there that actually think the no contact rule is permanent until your ex talks to you.
Yep, you read that right, they are idiots who are lazy because they refused to read the actual definition.
Well, my experience with the no contact rule in the past has taught me some very important lessons.
For one, a lot of men and women have trouble completing it which makes a massive no contact rule (like a time period of 60 days) hard to complete. Of course, probably the most important thing that I have learned through my experiences with the no contact rule is that no two situations are alike. Do you see what I mean when I say that there is truly no such thing as a universal no contact rule? As a result of my knowledge I have came up with three different time periods for the no contact rule that are effective in most situations. This time frame is perfect for a situation where an ex is getting really antsy when you are ignoring them. Of course, you can’t mess around with people like this with long no contact rules like the 30 day rule and the 45 day rule. The 30 day no contact rule is the standard no contact rule that most of the experts out there say to implement.
Obviously I also recommend it but not in the same way that most of the other experts out there recommend it but more on that later. Well, if a woman contacts you only once during the NC rule then the 30 day rule is probably ideal. Out of the three different no contact rules that I am recommending here I would say that without a doubt I recommend the 21 day rule the most. The real flaw with the longer no contact rules like the 30 day rule and the 45 day rule is that when you start them you have no idea how your ex is going to react. Are they going to go crazy and threaten to cut you out of their lives forever or will they be just as stubborn as you?
The 45 day rule is perfect for people who have done something really bad in their relationships. For example, if you cheated on your ex multiple times with multiple different people then something tells me that he or she isn’t going to get over that in 21 days or even 30 days. For example, a regular breakup that ended on pretty decent terms isn’t going to require a 45 day rule.
Of course, like I explained above with the 30 day rule I like to tell people that the NC rules are interchangeable on the fly. The essence of the no contact rule is going to revolve around your ability to ignore your ex.
Basically if you and your ex can somehow get in contact with one another I want you to stay away from them on it. Just so I really hammer this point home I want to give you a common example that I come across. Lets say that you decide to use the 21 day rule no contact rule on your ex and everything is going good and on day 5 your ex reaches out to you.
A few days ago a man who is trying to get his girlfriend back contacted me with a very interesting question.
As I said above, there are a few circumstances where no matter what you do you are going to be forced to alter your no contact rule. Below I have compiled a list of all the situations which require you to slightly break the no contact rule and what to do in those situations. Obviously it is going to be impossible to do a full out no contact rule if you work with your ex for a number of reasons but mainly because you have to retain a working relationship with him or her. Lets say that you have decided that you are going to attempt the 21 day rule but you work with your ex. For 21 days you are going to implement the no contact rule meaning you ignore your exes every attempt of communication towards you. If your ex tries to bring up the relationship then you need to very kindly tell him or her that you are not ready to talk about the relationship yet.
After your 21 days are up then you can begin the same re-attraction plan that everyone else on this site goes through after the no contact rule. Usually what happens is that a couple who is living together gets into a massive argument which prompts them to break up and then they are forced to live together in awkwardness until their living situation is worked out.
Well, in the instances where you are forced to talk with your ex about something stay away from your past relationship at all costs. Another situation where I see people having to break the no contact rule is when they share a child with their ex. If you are in a relationship long enough then most likely the two of you shared things throughout your time together. First off, any communication or meetup with your ex to exchange items should be only about the items. You didn’t think you were just going to sit around and wait for the NC to conclude did you?
A common mistake I see of my visitors and even my clients is the fact that they are lazy when it comes to the no contact rule. If you were a dating a girl you really loved (I am assuming you are man here since this website is tailored more towards males) and she broke up with you, you would probably be very upset.
I want you to adopt this type of a mentality when it comes to your time during the no contact rule.
I want you to look at what went wrong in your relationship on your side and shore up your weaknesses. For example, lets say that towards the end of your relationship with your ex you were a bit clingy or you had a bunch of fights over stupid things.
Of course, achieving perfection when it comes to exes has more to do then just your mentality. You are using the no contact rule to get your ex back which means your ex already knows who you are to a certain extent. However, we talked about the samurai mentality above and improving your personality so we have that covered but what I really want for you is to have a crazy before and after moment.
The beauty of the no contact rule is that not only does it give you time to work on yourself but it also gives you time away from your ex to have a before and after moment. No, creating a perfect before and after moment is about upgrading your style, grooming, having good hygiene and looking like you are the envy of others. One of the most interesting before and after shots that I have ever seen has to do with the famous celebrity David Beckham.
Now, we do have to take into account that in the before picture above Beckham looks to be about 16 and in the after picture he looks to be about 30 but push that aside for a moment.
So, as you can see, it takes more than just losing weight to have a great before and after moment. My name is Chris, and I help millions of guys per year improve themselves, and get their ex girlfriends to come running back. Last weekend she told me one of our colleagues were taking her out on a date and asked if I was okay with it. Also to add to that I wanted to ask if I go through that whole no contact how would I reestablish contact since I kinda said not to talk anymore? I was with my girlfriend for a year where we went travelling together for 3 months and spent a lot of time together. Hi Gf has just broken up with me, I am doing the 30 NC we have been together for 2 years, I became clingy and she left me saying she doesn’t feel the same. Be active during nc..be happy ?? improve yourself, change your appearance and be proactive ok? If you take some time to look around the site you will notice that every single article I have written that is based around the no contact rule has hundreds (and sometimes thousands) of comments from women. Psstt… if you are asking that then you probably did break it.Want to Know EXACTLY How Likely You Are to Get Your ExBoyfriend Back, in Only 2 Minutes? Anyways, the no contact rule is a relatively simple idea that gets more complex as you peel the layers back. For example, the general premise of the no contact rule states that you are supposed to ignore an ex under any circumstances for 21-90 days straight.
As a result, the advice I gave women was slightly flawed because I hadn’t seen enough to formulate an opinion of my own. You often hear the ex recovery experts out there preach the strictness that goes along with the no contact rule.
There has probably never been a truer phrase that I have muttered in my time on this earth than that phrase above. In all my years doing this the one big epiphany I have had is that every situation I encounter is unique and may require different tactics to succeed. This upsets me because I honestly just want to help everyone who needs it and the thought that I might fail you at times is disheartening.
So, I guess I am fighting a losing battle in that sense since this is such a complex process. Nevertheless, I am all about improving YOUR odds so you can succeed in the end and I intend on searching for answers for the rest of my life if I have to, to improve your odds dramatically.
If you want to persevere with the no contact rule in a situation where it looks like you won’t be able to do it then you have to be willing to adapt.
Well, that and the fact that the women who actually listen to my advice always seem to do better in the end. Most women who are faced with these situations fail because they think that utilizing the no contact rule is impossible.
So, what I am going to do for you is go through each of these situations one by one and explain the adaptations, alterations and tweaks that I recommend in each situation.
It’s kind of hard to implement a no contact rule when your significant other lives with you. If he instigates a conversation your job is to be nice but not to linger in a conversation too long.
He needs to feel like there is a definite difference between the normal you that he is so used to and the post breakup you.
This is why, when you live with your ex, you need to put on this facade that things aren’t ok. There definitely has to be some type of difference between you before and after the breakup if you live together.
So, when it comes to putting things together I am always the first person in line to attempt it.
This principle isn’t just true of physical problems like putting together a TV stand. So, the idea behind the no contact rule while living together is to give your ex a problem to solve so you can position him in an area where he is going to be forced to gain your approval to fix the problem. This is another one of those situations where you can’t really use the no contact rule. Well, before we get to that I think it is important to mention that work and school are two different entities and within those entities are different entities. So, what I would like to do now is take these different entities within entities and explain how the no contact rule has to be altered to fit the needs of each individual entity. In my opinion the differences between high school and college present a big enough difference to warrant a divide. So, obviously I am going to be talking about the changes you have to make during your period of no contact in each of these cases.
The biggest disadvantage that follows high school is the fact that your opportunity to see your ex boyfriend is higher than it would be in college.
Now, an advantage that goes along with the no contact rule in high school is the fact that I haven’t met many high school students who have been able to successfully implement it. You want to be short with him but not mean which is actually a pretty hard thing to accomplish if you think about it because we automatically assume that someone is mad with us if they are short with us. Anyways, other than the situations where you are forced to communicate with him the no contact rule pretty much remains the same.
Do this for 30 days and then you can begin the process outlined in The No Contact Rule Book. An ex boyfriend who you have dated through college has probably seen more when it comes to relationships and you have to use this to your advantage. A man who was in a relationship with a girl who cheated on him is most likely going to be paranoid that his next girlfriend will do the same to him.
Since you are in college I am going to assume that you are going to be taking a class together. So, lets say that you walk into class one day and you completely ignore your ex and you start talking to some other guy that sits near you.
Again, if he tries to talk to you apply the same rules as above in that you are pleasant but very short. Also, one thing I forgot to mention above was the fact that the second he gives you an opportunity to exit the conversation you take it.
There are a lot of women who visit this site that wonder what they should do with regards to the no contact rule if they work with their ex.
I look at this as any type of job that you won’t see your ex five days a week like you would with a career.
Think of a summer job for a kid in high school or just a job on the side to pick up some extra cash.
The biggest positive that goes along with a part time job is that the job only requires some of your time so it makes the no contact rule slightly more effective because you won’t have to see your ex all the time. A career is a job that you will be at for many years and it is looked at as a full time job where you will have to see your ex boyfriend a minimum of five days a week.
Obviously performing a no contact rule is going to be extremely tough in this situation so you are going to have to adopt a form of limited contact. In other words, the rules of no contact still apply but since you are going to be forced to talk with your ex (since you see him 5 days a week) you are going to have to figure out exactly how to approach conversations with him. If you look depressed, angry and sad then your one word answer is going to be taken as negative.
If you look happy, upbeat and bubbly then your one word answer is going to be taken more positive.
Obviously you can’t do the no contact rule if you have to communicate with your ex over the kids.
She is living with her parents so she can use the no contact rule in some respects with not contacting and seeing her ex. No, in this case Mary is allowed to break the no contact rule to talk about topics concerning the child. As long as it’s about Jake (the child) Mary can break the no contact rule to communicate.
No, any time she breaks her no contact rule it has to strictly be about her child and that’s it. You will find that since you are forced to communicate a bit more with your ex during NC in this situation that the chances of having him bring up the past relationship are slightly more likely.


This site has becomes famous in underground circles and as a result a lot of the ideas I have presented on it have gone viral. When women do this to men it is almost equivalent to having an annoying gnat buzz around your head and no matter how many times you try to swat it away it just keeps on buzzing around. In fact, I don’t think I have ever talked about crazy men text gnatting women who have done the no contact rule on them. So, what happens if you use the no contact rule on an ex boyfriend and he texts you the following series of text messages seven days into NC?
Most experts will have you believe that you should continue your no contact period if this happens. You have to remember that the main reason that you are doing NC in the first place is to get your ex back and if he is begging for you back you have already won! So, do you break no contact right there and then and have the happy reunion that you so desperately want?
Your ex boyfriend has to do seven positive gnat messages in one day for you to break NC off early. So, if he sends you five text messages (begging for you back) and calls you twice then that would be considered seven positive actions in one day and you can break NC off early to discuss his terms of reinstatement.
Lets say that your ex boyfriend has sent you ten text messages all with one common theme, they are all negative. If your ex boyfriend tries to send a text message like this to you he is trying to illicit a reaction out of you. So, why would you give your ex boyfriend the pleasure of communicating with you if he has just got done cursing you out?
The only time you get to reward him with the proverbial cookie is if he his positive about wanting you back. There are different protocols that have to be put into effect for each of these situations.
He has kind of forced your hand here if he calls you up one day and asks for his things back.
It is at this point that you are going to be faced with a pretty tough decision if you are already doing the NC rule.
Remember, our goal with the NC rule isn’t to steal his things and make him so mad that he never talks to you again, which you run the risk of doing if you ignore his attempts to exchange things. So, here is the protocol that I want you to put in place if he contacts you during your NC period and wants his things back.
If he tries to bring up your past relationship you just use some of the tricks I taught you already with the previous situations. The very first thing you need to determine is how important the things you want back from him are. For example, if its just a silly toothbrush you left over at his place it would be a little ridiculous if you wanted that back when you could just go to the dollar store and get one for a buck. If you can live without the things that he has then don’t bother breaking NC for them. If you do deem the things important enough then you have my permission to break NC for them. My name is Chris, and I help millions of women per year improve themselves, and get back with their ex boyfriends to finally have the life they dreamed of. What are the rules on close friends (who used to get on well with your ex) speaking to your ex during the NC period?
It is a complicate situation as i have two sons and a very horrible relationship with their father. After the break up we kept being in touch every day for almost a month, we saw each others , slept together and we have been miserable because we kept talking over and over about the same thing.He has always reached me out though, even though he was the one deciding to leave me and instead of not contacting him i have always been there because i was so scared of loosing him. I am devastated and angry with my self because I have not been strong enough to raise my standards and i have nurtured so far his confusions.
I am currently doing NC with my ex, but he send me a message with some information he really needs. Well, I already explained that it keeps the website up to date but as time moves on and I formulate more and more game plans for women and I see more situations I become better and better at helping people get their exes back. If you take my knowledge today and compare it to the knowledge I had when I first started this little website it’s like night and day.
Anyways, you are probably getting tired of me talking so lets dive right in to the new way of looking at the no contact rule. The no contact rule is without a doubt one of the most important strategies that you can employ to get your ex boyfriend back.
When you look at the big picture of the overall strategy of getting a boyfriend back you can generally divide the strategy into three separate parts.
This is usually the time where you are desperate to get your ex boyfriend back and you make every mistake in the book.
It is also during this time that most women stumble upon Ex Boyfriend Recovery and actually learn about the no contact rule.
This is the period of time when you are actually implementing the no contact rule on your ex boyfriend.
If the no contact rule is going to eat up half of your overall strategy to get your ex boyfriend back then it’s kind of a big deal and you should fully grasp it. When someone says the words “No Contact” what is the first thing that pops into your head? Basically the no contact rule is a period of time where you aren’t going to have any meetings, relationships or communications with a certain someone. I want to make this as clear as possible because I get so many women who make this mistake.
The no contact rule isn’t meant to be forever or until your ex boyfriend comes crawling back.
However, in order for me to properly explain this effect we are going to have to do a little role playing.
Well, lets pretend that you are implementing the no contact rule on your ex boyfriend and things are going well. Before I dive in to this I think it’s my duty to explain what the no contact rule working actually looks like. Of course, since you are in the no contact rule you cannot break your silence so you do the smart thing and continue ignoring him. I think it’s safe to say that the no contact rule is having the effect on him that you were hoping. In order to understand what is going on inside the mind of a man during a successful no contact rule you need to understand a bit about the way humans are.
One child is playing with a toy in a sandbox while the other child is playing with a toy as well. Well, the one child that is getting ignored probably is going to go crazy trying to get acknowledged.
Basically the baby went berserk trying to get the mothers attention when the mother went still. In a weird way I think this is happening inside men when they are ignored via the no contact rule. Women are always commenting that they don’t know why their ex boyfriend is reacting so crazily during the no contact rule.
But did you notice what happened with the baby when the mother went from being “still” to being loving again? So, for those women who are worried that the no contact rule may be too harsh on their exes and that their exes will hold a grudge for the rest of their life I have two things to tell you. From what I have seen from women who use the no contact rule it is rare for a man to hold a grudge. Now, another thing you may be wondering is why some men react sweetly during the no contact rule and some men react in a negative way. Notice how when the mother first starts ignoring her baby the baby doesn’t cry or throw a tantrum. The same can be said about men who are nice during NC and mean who are a tad mean during it. Some men determine that the best way to stop from being ignored by you is to be nice to you. Experts seem to be completely split when it comes to how long the no contact rule should be for. I know that’s probably not what you want to hear but the truth is that your ex boyfriend is unique. Before I used to be under the impression that the 30 day no contact rule was the way to go.
So, I guess what I am trying to say is that if your no contact rule is longer than 66 days then you run the risk of having an ex boyfriend be over you and if he completely is over you by that point then it makes getting him back that much harder.
You will notice that the three time frames that we are focused in on here are all below 60 days.
We don’t want to run the risk of having your ex boyfriend get out of the habit of thinking about you.
But that still doesn’t help us determine which of the three rules is best for you, does it? However, lets say that you have a really good chance to get your ex back and you know in your heart that your situation is conducive to success. Well, if that’s the case then I would say you can get away with the 21 day no contact rule. For those of you women who are just trying to cut down on the time it takes to get an ex boyfriend back this isn’t going to help your chances. Remember, the only ones who should be allowed to use this no contact rule are the women with really good chances of getting an ex boyfriend back.
Well, lets just say that they are either going to be in the 21 day rule or the 45 day rule below.
So, that’s why I cut cheating down to the 30 day rule since it has more success there.
Basically, the more time that goes by without you re-exhibiting the behavior the better because he will stop looking at you as a GNAT and you will have a better chance of getting him back. Now that you have a pretty good idea of what the no contact rule is lets talk about some of the wrinkles about it that none of the experts really touch on out there. Now, I want to preface this section by saying that I am not going to go as in-depth here as you like.
Because I have already written an uber in-depth article about how to handle just about every situation during the no contact rule. Nevertheless, I am going to add some new situations that I have covered in that article here. For the record Jane is totally made up but her made up story based on real life is going to help me prove a point.
One of the biggest reasons you do the no contact rule is so that you can get your ex boyfriend back so when that fantasy becomes a reality it’s ok to break no contact for that.
Lets say that you are using a 30 day no contact rule on your ex boyfriend and around day 4 or 5 he messages you and asks if he can get his things back from your place. The inevitability of a couple exchanging things when together is very high so it makes sense that if things were exchanged he would want them back. I mean, it’s amazing how these two little versions of you and your ex can bring about conversations after a breakup.
The answer is yes but you are going to have to make some obvious adjustments for the kiddos. If your ex brings up the kids (or you are forced to bring them up) you can break the no contact rule for that. You are absolutely allowed to break NC and respond to it but you want to keep the interaction ONLY about the kids.
I HAVE talked about it quite a bit but I haven’t ever really put the pieces together for you all in one place. On instinct most women guess that it’s to get their exes back and while the no contact rule can certainly be used for that there is another purpose of the no contact rule that hardly ever gets talked about. The truth is that when I first started this website I really only focused on helping women get back with their exes but as I gained more and more experience and credibility I learned something interesting.
Yes, it is a strategy that is meant to get your ex back but think about the time frame of the no contact rule. In many cases you are going to be waiting a full month before you can actively have a talk with your ex boyfriend. It means that you have a month of preparation to turn yourself into the best version of yourself and by doing that you will be actively working to get over the pain of the breakup. Winning a man back from a place of depression is a lot harder than trying to win him back from a place of happiness which is why I recommend self improvement during the no contact rule. The best way to get over the pain you are feeling is to focus on the things that you have control over.
Right off the bat we know that we have 21 – 45 days before we have to talk to your ex so lets not just sit on our hands here during this time frame. We are going to go through the no contact rule from start to finish and show you what you are supposed to do every step of the way using a fake character that I am about to create. So, the first thing that Virginia is going to want to do is to determine which no contact rule time frame is best for her. After much thought and deliberation Virginia has decided that she wants to embark on a 30 day no contact rule since she thinks that will give her ex enough time to miss her and give HER enough time to change her image completely. There are a lot of ways that Virgina can improve herself during the 30 day no contact period. What I am about to do now is something that I have never done here on Ex Boyfriend Recovery but I think it will be extremely helpful for you to see HOW the no contact rule will look from a birds eye view.
Like I said above, I am going to be answering those questions today but I am going to be doing so in a very unique way.
I am going to be using a calendar to demonstrate what a perfect no contact rule looks like.
To be honest I don’t think there is much more set up that I can use for this so I am just going to dive right in.
Now, I do know that a lot of you are using phones to read this article so hopefully you can see the calendar above because it’s kind of important. You will notice that there are 30 days on this calendar and under each of the 30 days are little items ranging from workouts to learning a new language.
Oh, also take notice on how every single day during this 30 day no contact period is jam packed with stuff to do. Of course, then there is the fact that every action found on the calendar serves one purpose, to help you become the best version of yourself. From the limited contact, I’ve been able to see why the break up happened and how he couldve fallen out of love with from my insecurities and nagging, and external issues like job stress. My question is this – the 30 days of limited no contact will be up in June when we still have a month left on our lease. Unfortunately, constantly harassing your ex by trying to convince them to take you back is also common.
The no contact rule after a breakup keeps you from committing further damaging mistakes and digging yourself into a larger hole.
Remember, the more you leave your ex with negative images of you, the more you will have to later reverse them in order to re-attract them back. In the strategy of getting back  your ex, no contact is the stage to heal, get rid of neediness and desperation and become confident and attractive again. I will be writing even more articles that will aid you in how to get your ex back, so be sure to bookmark my site and visit often. Well, that mistake ends today as this is going to be the most complete guide ever created on the no contact rule.
Thus, the information that I am providing on this page can be applied by both men and women in their relationships. A lot of my readers make the mistake of believing that completing the no contact rule is all that they need to do in order to win their exes affections back. In fact, I would say that just by completing the no contact rule you are only through half the battle. You see, when I first started advising people I only knew the bare minimum about the no contact rule and while I was able to help a lot of people with my knowledge I really didn’t know as much as I do now. Through these two sites I have been able to see the no contact rule performed thousands of times. So, as you can see I have literally seen over 40,000 situations involving exes most of which involved the no contact rule.
The complications to it really come in when you add other extracurricular factors into the equation.
Also, if you use a long no contact time period (like the 60 days one) the risk of your ex moving on to someone else is a lot higher.
However, it is really up to YOU to choose which one of these no contact rules are perfect for your situation. For example, lets say that you start your no contact rule and on day one your ex texts you. Instead just know that for someone like this, someone who is really troubled by your lack of attention to them, the 21 day rule is perfect because it allows enough time to go by for them to miss you and also for you to regain some control of the situation.
While you may be able to get away with the 30 day rule you aren’t likely to get away with the 45 day rule with an ex who requires attention on this level.
The 30 day period is perfect for women who don’t contact you very much during the no contact period. Of course, my experience has taught me a pretty clever trick when it comes to the 30 day rule. Lets say that you decide that you want to implement the no contact rule for 30 days and your ex goes crazy by contacting you 10 times. If your ex doesn’t contact you at all you can extend your no contact rule from 21 days to 30 or 45 days. So, if you find that your ex is really getting antsy about you ignoring him or her you might be better off altering the no contact rule to a shorter time frame.
That means that if they contact you, you have to ignore them and if you feel the urge to contact them you cannot. Luckily, 75% of you won’t have to alter your no contact rule but for those of you that will this section is for you. I can’t tell you how many times I get questions about how to approach this situation on a daily basis. The question you are wondering at this point is if no contact is even going to be possible for you. In the instances where work forces you to communicate with each other then it is ok to communicate as long as you keep it strictly about the business. A lot of the effectiveness of the no contact rule here is going to depend on how you handle your no contact rule alteration.
Don’t project a negative vibe because people are turned off by someone with a negative vibe.


Remember, be friendly and nice but also be kind of short until your no contact time period has completed. However, if you find yourself in this situation then there are a few guidelines that you have to follow. Well, during the no contact rule I want you to adjust your mindset to where you won’t be clingy and where you wont take insignificant stuff so personally that you are willing to fight over it.
Now, a lot of people out there are going to tell you that who you are on the inside is what really matters and while I definitely agree with them I think that in order for people to see who you are on the inside you have to first convince them on the outside. Well, after the no contact rule your aim is to shatter their view of you and create a new one.
Throughout the month she has gone on a liking spree on my social media on two separate occasions and drunk dialed me once, saying that she loves and misses me but doesn’t know what she wants. I want to ask you a question, you see I was very close to a friend of mine in fact stated that we were in love, but we were still at a school that forbids relationships, a kind of semi military school.
The last two months of our relationship consisted of her becoming increasingly distant and denying that there were any issues. Do you think I should end NC at her birthday and begin gradually texting to rebuild attraction after, or do you think I should wish her happy birthday but then remain in NC until she reaches out to me first, no matter how long that is? I had a couple of weeks where I was a bit distant, she had work issues and she decided to break up with me and go back home to Italy for a month.
Ex and I broke up about 5 months ago, she’s been talking to this guy she met up with a couple days after we broke up and finally posted them together a couple days ago.
My ex girlfriend, only of a short term relationship 3 months or so broke up with me, I think I was a bit keen. So, what happens when you are faced with a situation where you can’t do the no contact rule?
With college you are often running from building to building taking different classes and with high school, while you may be taking different classes, you may be in the same building a lot of the time. If he tracks you down or if you are forced to talk to him make sure you aren’t rude to him. If she talks about the weather, the amazing game last night or something that reminded her of Mike then that is considered a breach of the no contact rule and you will incur the wrath of me. So, the protocol that is in place here has to do with how important the items you want back are. Before we split he borrowed me his cellphone, he didn’t use it anymore, but he texted me that his phone broke and now he has to use it again but in order to reset it he needs some of my accounts details.
You know, the kind of website that has really good content for a few years and then all of a sudden just falls off the map.
I am talking about mistakes like becoming a GNAT, having him perceive you a desperate and coming off as super needy. Well, generally women who decide that they do want to get their ex boyfriends back AND use the no contact rule to do so will spend half of their strategy in the no contact rule and half of their strategy outside the no contact rule.
After much thought you determine that you want to do the 30 day rule so that means for the next thirty days you are going to be ignoring your ex in every shape or form possible. The two children have been best friends for a very long time and are talking to each other. It basically consists of having a mother sit in front of a baby and start blankly at the baby with a still face.
I know I have said this a lot throughout this site but I am going to say it again because it’s that important.
He is unlike anyone else walking this earth and that means that the no contact rule will have to be shaped to him. In my opinion, there are three optimum no contact times and which one you choose to use will depend entirely on your situation. I used to think that situations where you cheated on an ex or did something horrible like that would be ideal for the 45 day rule but as I have seen more and more women embark on the rule in those instances I have found that more time tends to be more negative. This is the ring that your father gave you before he passed away so it holds a lot of sentimental value to you. However, if you have just left some clothes or toiletries over at your exes you shouldn’t bother breaking the no contact rule to get them. In other words, I want you to embark on the no contact rule the same way most everyone else would.
Sometimes the best way to get an ex back isn’t just to focus on getting him back but to focus your energies inward.
Look, I am not going to presume to know your entire situation with your ex like the back of my hand but I will tell you one thing. Lets do something that will actively increase your chances of winning him back AND help you get over that sinking feeling in your gut that you are feeling right now.
The idea is to fill up your own personal calendar so much that you don’t even have time to text an ex.
So after the limited contact and we still live together, how do I reinitiate contact again? His mum wants to have a coffee with me and he has told me he would be happy if I did, he also said he doesn’t mind me talking to his friends as they all really like me. We had a long discussion through text and he did open up about how he felt in the relationship and discussed more why it ended. When your ex wont have any of it, it’s also common to get frustrated and say and do stupid things to them. I mean, wouldn’t it be weird to expect that your ex would want you back after you ignored them for a certain amount of time? So much so that I wrote up a 30,000 word guide that pretty much walks you through the entire process of winning an ex back. As a result of dealing with this many situations I was able to figure out a lot about what works about the no contact rule and what doesn’t work with it but perhaps the most important thing I was able to get was what you can do to shore up the weaknesses of the no contact rule. However, at the same time if you come back to your ex too soon with a super short no contact period then not enough time has passed for them to realistically want to take you back.
For example, someone who really needs space or needs to be alone for a long period of time will react better to a 45 day no contact rule versus a 21 day one. Most of the gurus out there that teach people about the no contact rule are iron clad about their beliefs on it. The real reason is the fact that most people end up going crazy when you ignore them and the 21 day rule is perfect for dealing with people like that. Well, in this case I think it would be smart to alter your no contact rule down to 21 days. The only time that you would ever be able to contact them is after your no contact period has completed. So, while you are ignoring your ex boyfriend or girlfriend you should also simultaneously be working on yourself to be the best version of yourself that ever existed. What I want to know is based on this should I even bother and if I should how long should I make the no contact (assuming that is the first step I should take)? And that she wanted to focus on school first and we promised to be have a status after we graduated. Finally she broke up with me telling me the spark is gone and she doesn’t see a future with me.
It seems like a really small thing to break up over and I texted her most days trying to make conversation and get her back. She would also like to use the no contact rule on Mike but she isn’t sure on how to approach it when she has to communicate with him over their child. It caused us to argue a lot because we had different opinions on what was happening and he started saying that I was changing and i wasn’t the same person i was and neither was he. I am trying to be vigilant because I know that if he really wants to talk to me, he would pick up the phone and call, instead of a single message every morning. Now, my birthday is coming up in about 3weeks and of course he being the polite guy he is will whatsapp me.
In other words, once that time frame is up your no contact rule ends immediately and you start to go on the offensive to get your boyfriend back. All of a sudden one child gets upset with the other one and decides to ignore the other child. Assuming that it took him 66 days to get out of the habit of talking to you that would mean that a 90 day rule would far exceed that 66 day habit rule. So, when the no contact rule starts affecting her ex in a positive way so much so that he decides that he wants to ask her to be back together she completely ignores him. After seeing that did not change his mind, I decided to do limited no contact because we still live together. I was shooting for 30 but I recently heard off his best friend that he’s trying to move on but he still gets upset when he thinks about me and the breakup, which was surprising to me because he must have an amazing poker face. The last two years haven’t been the best due to me becoming depressed due to my birth control pill.
I have been working on myself, posting on social media, and I’m three weeks into NC and my ex texted me last night apologizing for hurting me and how he handled things. Or, perhaps, and most likely, you’re fueling negative emotions within your ex by certain behaviors your doing (discussed more in the later points below).
Of course, then we can look at the other side of the coin when you have a person who can’t go very long without interaction. He looks like he has gotten his fair share of sun in the after picture while in the before picture he is a bit paler. Since I last commented things continued to go up and down in the same fashion that they were and we were friends with benefits. The first 4 months went on perfectly, but sometimes she had troubles with my behavior, well i had change it and we went on better, and then one day, on the 9th month, she told me that we should cancel the promise and let everything flow, because she didnt wether we woill end up together or not, and then on the february, she stated that she still hated my old behavior that ive been trying to change, maybe it wasnt really convincing, the changing but in still trying because ive never been in a relationahip before, believe me or not, and then she said that we needed time apart, and we did but my fault was i kept checking on her days after days, and one day she said that its better for us to be friends, but back at class she ignored me like hell and when i asked why she just said nothing, and that it was nothing at all, but during lomg holidays when we were chatting she texted me with short replies, but everytime i stop chatting her, she called me back, and it continued for 2 months its like shes slowly slipping away from me, before finally i talked it to her and she answered that she no longer holds any feelings for me and told me that she doesnt have to repay the love ive given, and because it was late at night she told me to end the conversation but i mistakened it to end the relationship, and so begun the game me and her ignoring each other for about a month, but during that one month i always tried to find out who she was dating anew, but that curiosity made her i think a bit disturbed and that she confronted me 6 days ago, and that she told me again that has no longer retain any feelings for me and that shes currently not liking anyone else and that she said that shes the type of girl that judges boys, the pros and cons of that boy and decides if hes worthy, and that if theres something wrong about him and if she likes him she’ll repair it, but unfortunately she found out something about me at a bad time, when were apart, and that made cant continue the relationship with me and that we finally forgave each other and agreed being just friends. For 6 weeks after our breakup she continued to send me mixed messages and tell me she needed time and didn’t make a ‘decision’ and was not moving on.
We have been split apart for 5 weeks now and she only started ignoring me last weekend when I asked to meet her. Before NC she said she was done with me and was really mean about a personal issue going on in my life.
It was my idea as the chances of us being together were really small in future and it was bothering her a lot, so i broke up as i thought she wont be able to take the guilt of breaking up. I suggested we take space and then see if we felt the same after a while and decided to come back or move on. I just wasn’t sure how I should initiate contact again if we are still living together at that time. He did break up with me but at the time he still loved me, he just didnt think we were right for each other or making each other happy (dated for 2.5 years). You have to weaken your own attachment to your ex, stop giving them the power over you, and this can only be done if you heal and move on from the breakup so you can start being rational and attractive again. I texted her the next day to say that I do not want her to contact me unless she is sober and truly meant what she said. She continued to reassure me that she (no bs) loved me and all that and things were alright but I was still stuck wanting more but not getting anywhere.
And then 2 days ago i started chatting her again, she ifnored me like hell, when i asked why she said that this is the real her, a quite girl, but on the contrary shes a really fun person. She had been distant but started to open up to me again just before she started to ignore me. Anyway, since I found out this news, I think Im emotionally ready to slowly make my way out of the no contact period while he still cares, but I need to know whether that’s just me missing him or logic speaking. I lost myself in the relationship and stopped putting time and energy into the activities I enjoy. I lost my sex drive, became very distant and cold, negative, slept all the time, didn’t want to get out of bed, and had no energy or motivation. He did not say he did not want to work things out but he also didn’t say he wanted too. When you know everything is behind then you can start over as friends but don’t be friends with benefits again.
I did though when we were still in a close condition told my friend that i kinda like he older her when she was still quiter than the current. After some weeks she wanted to get back, but i denied, not coz i didnt want to get back, coz i knew she wont be able to handle the stress of future again n we ll have these pointless discussions again. I have realized that I still have expectations of him, and I still care for him, so being friends is proving difficult for me. Part of me thinks he is afraid to open up about how he feels now because things would go back to the way they were. And now I’ve noticed that she took down a couple of our photos and has uploaded provocative photos on her social media.
The break up was also a bad decesion as i also failed my exams n all that negativity was also affecting me a lot n i cudnt think straight. I kept insisting on an answer and unfortunately even performed that needy behavior you guys talk about for a little less than a month. I told him that I completely understand why he left and apologized for hurting him as well. I’ve been doing a great job at improving myself throughout the NC period and can honestly say I am in the best physical shape of my life. My birthday is next week on the 20th day of this 21 day NC and if she texts me do I ignore that? I was insisting because we were still together but he didn’t treat me like a girlfriend, he became more distant. I really want to ask her to meet for a coffee so she can see this is stupid but maybe it is a bad idea. He has communicated numerous times to me what he was unhappy with but I just couldn’t understand since I was in that state of mind. And I decided I couldn’t be like that, so I took in into my own hands and broke up with him.
He said things like he thought he’d met the right person, but at the wrong time and he could still see us eventually being together. I have realized that I need to work on myself in order to have a successful relationship, so I have made the necessary changes. 10 months into our 2 year relationship, while traveling out of the country with friends, we stayed at an apartment with two girls. Then i wanted to get back, i made her sure that I will do everything to make the future happen, I apologised for being a jerk, but she denied n said she needs space n wants to be alone n away from expectations and on her own terms.
It was very painful because I didn’t want the relationship to end but I knew it was what I had to do. I also wanted to break up, but he made the words official so in a sense he broke up with me. The one girl offered for me to sleep in her bed instead of the hardwood floor and I accepted the offer. I told her that I ll leave the door open n if she ever changes her mind about getting back, she should tell me. It has been a month since we split and I already feel better and getting back to the old me, although I still have a long way to go. We didnt talk much, she did call me rarely to ask about some study related stuff as she is my junior in college. I will admit that I have tried to talk to him after he ended it and noticed that he was ignoring me (which is understandable). Yesterday she asked me where her cooler was (I had it and locked it up in my car with all of my other stuff). I was not physically or emotionally involved with this girl – we literally just slept on the same surface.
But last day she went home n we had a long video chat, ended up having phone sex on the chat, n the day after.
But after that she said she felt guilty and we shudnot do it, she didnt change her mind n refused to get back together, i thought she has finally agreed to be together, but she didnt.
Class is the only time we talk, but it’s only about the project itself, I avoid any other topic. My ex saw I was friends with this girl on Social Media, saw that she had messaged me (probably something like ‘hope you made it back to the USA alright’) and asked me who she is.
We have texted maybe once or twice, because we had to for school; but it was only a few messages long and I was the one to cut the conversation short. So after she told me she was banging our mutual friend, I told her that I had actually slept in this girls bed but that nothing happened. So I assured him that I understood and I didn’t pressure him to go and I told him that I believe he is a strong person and that I cared for him and loved him and I would be there as a friend. I did find out he went to a local bar with another girl (that he was interested in back in high school) a week after he ended our relationship. She was obviously hurt, but I thought I was doing the right thing by being honest so we could reconcile and since I didn’t actually cheat it wouldn’t be the end of the world. It was very difficult the first week, but it has become easier and I’m working on myself along the way.
He seemed really sad and was mostly just making up an excuse to check in to make sure I was okay. Part of me thinks he did it to avoid his feelings over the breakup but the other part of me thinks that he’s genuinely interested in her considering he was back in high school. And there’s a school dance shortly after where girls invite guys and I wanted to invite him to that, which is 23 days from now.
Yesterday when I saw him I walked half a block chatting with him because we were heading in the same direction to class. Then the third time I was coming out of the gym and he was going in and neither of us really looked all that happy to see each other.
I want him to remember the good things about me and let go of the past but I don’t know how to make him let go of my mistakes (though I have never done anything as bad as cheating).
Also, my boyfriend is a pretty impatient person and he was a real player when we first met. I am worried that in the next month he will revert back to his old ways and start sleeping with a bunch of different girls and dating other girls and will get over me.
Next weekend will be 30 days since I sent my response to her letter, and 21 days since I asked if she received it, but her birthday is also coming up the following weekend which would be 30 days since I asked if she received the letter and 37 since I actually sent it. Not sure if I should continue NC until she reaches out to me, or end NC a week before her birthday so that there is a build up before her birthday rather than randomly wishing her a happy b-day after NC, or the alternative which is not reaching out at all or doing a longer 45 day NC and reaching out after her birthday. I am also afraid she might move home to be with her family soon because she doesn’t have many close friends in our city and her father is ill and she has been visiting home a lot.
I have been ignoring her on Instagram (she posts like nothing is wrong), but she recently liked a very flattering selfie that I posted a week ago.



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Comments to No contact ex boyfriend back

  1. Azeri_Sahmar — 13.02.2016 at 22:25:45 Get an ex girlfriend or boyfriend again way to do this.
  2. Vampiro — 13.02.2016 at 19:13:27 Unless you're on the verge feeling as if there's actual progress and change.
  3. NINJA — 13.02.2016 at 14:12:48 Got made these changes to your attitude, however.