28.04.2016

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Before you entered into a relationship with your ex boyfriend you knew that deep down being clingy and needy was probably going to be a turn off to him but as you developed a deeper connection with him you couldn’t help yourself.
Now, I am not insinuating that you approached anything close to this when you broke up with your ex boyfriend I am just saying that I know what it’s like to be in love and I know that sometimes it can make you do some clingy or needy things.
In this guide I am going to be talking about how you can recover from these clingy or needy things that occurred in your relationship with your ex. I bet you weren’t expecting me to say that being clingy can have a positive aspect to it, huh? As it turns out there is a way in which being clingy and needy can be an attractive thing to men. So, if you have ever wondered what kinds of things a stage 5 clinger does to turn off a man then the section entitled, The Negatives Of Being Clingy, is going to be especially interesting to you. Whenever you do research on women who are clingy or overly needy you often hear experts scolding them for that type of behavior.
To me if a girl gets a little clingy it means she really has strong feelings for me and I like that.
Whenever a girl exhibits clingy behavior like jealousy, constantly wanting to be around me and texting me a lot I kind of like it. I want to tell you about what a girl can do to all of a sudden make those cute little clingy behaviors into overly clingy to the point where it becomes a turn off.
One thing we have already established about me and most other men is that we like needy behavior but only to a certain extent. Lets pretend that you and I are dating and at the beginning of the relationship you would exhibit the three clingy behaviors I mentioned above. Of course, as time went on I began to notice a gradual change in the intensity of these behaviors. For example, any time you would get jealous you would get jealous to the point where you would start a huge argument and you wouldn’t trust me about anything. You also became so clingy to the point where any time I would go into a room you would have to follow me in there. Of course, as our relationship grew deeper the texting ratio changed completely to a 3:1 ratio.
You see, when most women search the internet for advice on clingy behavior most experts list out all the needy behaviors that you need to avoid but almost none of them do a good job of explaining WHY you need to avoid them.
Imagine for a moment that you are walking down the street and all of a sudden you hear this buzzing around your head. It is entirely possible that this is how your ex boyfriend viewed you in your relationship if you were too overbearing with how you texted him. One of the best ways to determine if you were a text gnat or not is to look at your last 100 text messages between you and your ex.
If for example, the texting ratio ends up being something like 70:30 where you have sent him 70 text messages and he has only responded to 30 of those text messages then that probably means you are venturing into text gnat territory where you are becoming kind of overbearing. Someone who is a text gnat screams desperation and no guy wants a serious relationship with a woman who is desperate. In fact, I remember a long time ago there was one girl who had such a crush on me that she would text gnat the heck out of me.
She kept texting me to the point where it really started annoying me and I eventually had to say something to her.
Because she seemed totally desperate and if I am going to be attracted to anyone it was going to be a woman who is smart, independent and NOT desperate. Now, a normal girlfriend should be excited about the prospect of going to a party with her boyfriend. Instead of being excited about the party you get angry at me for texting another girl and accuse me of cheating. You become so threatened by Tina that you forbid me to ever text another girl for the rest of my life. In my opinion, extreme jealousy has a direct correlation to a woman trying to control a man and nothing annoys a man more than a woman who tries to control him. I have only heard of one example of shadowing in my personal life but I have heard of multiple examples through this site which is why I know it exists. Shadowing- Becoming so dependent on another human being that you have to be around them all the time. If you are still a little confused when it comes to this concept don’t feel bad, it is a little complicated to grasp. When I was in high school a very long time ago I knew a guy that would get angry at his girlfriend for the dumbest things. When I heard this I was baffled at why he would have to accompany her if she simply wanted to leave the room. What we have here is a case of someone who is so insecure that he wouldn’t even let his girlfriend leave the room without him. Some of the more common forms of shadowing I have seen is the classic invasion of alone time.
Look, sometimes men need their alone time where you aren’t constantly badgering them with questions or the latest drama that went on at work.
Think about it, if your ex wanted to have a guys night out with his friends but you insisted on tagging along you were harassing him with unwanted attention which is technically the same behavior a stalker engages in. If you were so insecure that you couldn’t even let him have an hour on his own to recharge his batteries then you are technically defined as a talker. That means that every day whenever I read your comments on this site I can kind of get bummed out because, to me, it sometimes feels as if all I see are failed relationships.
In other words, I am basically saying that the only time I would hang around other girls is if my girlfriend (you in this imaginary case) was there. So, lets pretend that you are really insecure about other girls around me, even though I have proven to you multiple times that I am the most trustworthy man on the planet.
In fact, you have become so insecure about other women that you constantly try to control me and basically order me to never talk to any of them ever again. In fact, most of the time by you controlling a man you push him to do the behavior you don’t want him to in the first place.
Now that you have a pretty good idea of what clingy behavior is and why it annoys men lets take a look at what you are going to have to do in order to overcome that clingy behavior to have a chance at getting your ex boyfriend back.
Now, before I get started on explaining what I mean by these four pillars I feel it is very important to discuss the point of what we are trying to accomplish here.
The point of this section is to show you what you have to do in order to achieve that goal.
If the main goal that we are trying to accomplish here is overcoming your exes impression of you then it is probably a really good idea to figure out what that impression is. For example, if you and I dated each other and I was constantly telling you how I hated the fact that you were always trying to control me then you would know that the clingy behavior that you would really have to work on is to NOT be controlling.
In other words, what we are trying to do here is to figure out what behaviors you exhibited that needs to change for you to even have a shot of getting him back. While I never actually was in a relationship with this person (I never even went a date with her actually) she exhibited some super clingy behavior from the get go that made me immediately want to not talk to her. Any time I wouldn’t respond to a text message she would send she would grow frustrated and berate me with insults. I immediately classified her behavior as clingy and controlling and I did not want a presence like that in my life. They call, text or skype their ex so much that it can sometimes go beyond regular clingyness. If you need a refresher on how creepy this can be take a look at the very first picture I posted on this page of the woman who called her ex 77,000 times after her breakup with him. A year or two ago one of my friends told me something really interesting about relationships. By being clingy and needy with phone calls or texts you are playing right into what they already believe is going to happen. If I am being completely honest with you it annoys me when I see women begging for their exes back because to me that means they don’t know their own value. So, rather than playing right into what he already believes is going to happen after a breakup (you getting all clingy with phone calls) I would recommend that you do the exact opposite of that. By doing a no contact rule for either 21 or 30 days (depending on the situation) you are going to accomplish two things.
If you guessed the girl who tries to get her boyfriend back when he is not that angry then you guessed right. I am going to be talking about this a lot more in-depth in the next section but for now I can give you a little teaser of whats to come. While you are using the no contact rule to give your ex time to cool down you can also be using it as a way to get rid of your clingy habits and reshape your image so that your ex no longer views you as clingy. Self improvement is key if you don’t want to be looked at as clingy or needy anymore. It’s funny, I was scrolling through Facebook the other day and noticed one of those overused motivational quotes that always seem to get shared.
However, when you sit down and really peel back the layers you will find that, that quote has a flaw. Well, I take offense to that because I personally believe that self improvement should be something every human being should strive for. Now, I am not saying you should compromise your morals or do something your not comfortable with but I think it is completely ok to want to be a better version of yourself.
Since this is a page dedicated to eliminating neediness lets focus on how you can improve yourself if your neediness is tied directly to your own insecurities.
For example, we often get overly jealous because we are afraid our significant other might cheat on us. I mean, you can try to turn your feelings off as much as possible but in the end we are all human beings and not robots. So, what I would like to teach you is the method I try to employ when dealing with my own personal insecurities. I would have to say that without a doubt the biggest insecurity I have when it comes to relationships would be the fear of being cheated on.
The very next day I found out that she started dating another guy, someone who she had been pursuing since I started pursuing her. While she didn’t cheat on me it was my first experience with deception and I did not like how it felt.
As I gained more experience in dealing with the opposite sex I learned more and more about how women could sometimes use deception to get away with things. Unfortunately, this site doesn’t help that insecurity at all when I come face to face with infidelity on a daily basis. However, I figured out an excellent way to deal with this insecurity so it doesn’t make me exhibit clingy behavior.
You see, the fear of infidelity can sometimes cause you to get jealous over unnecessary things. Whats even better is that I am using my insecurity to force me to set that type of high standard. You see, as long as I keep that standard so far out of reach for other men I have nothing to worry about because my significant other would literally have to be an idiot to stray.
However, as you fell deeper into the relationship you slowly but surely started losing your hobbies. Thought 1- It’s sweet that you can fall so deeply in love with someone that their passions become yours. Thought 2- It’s dangerous to fall so deeply in love that you lose yourself in that person. My name is Chris, and I help millions of women per year improve themselves, and get back with their ex boyfriends to finally have the life they dreamed of.
When it comes to breaking up, we're usually of the opinion that the person doing the dumping should at least have the decency to do it in person.
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Seriously though, if you see any book, product or article that guarantees that it can get you your ex back 100% of the time you should stop and realize that you are probably about to look at something that was made up just to get you to buy it or read it. Don’t worry though, I saw this problem and spent two months creating that step by step plan people were clamoring for. You are going to discover that this page is really long, in-depth but more importantly, it is going to help you to not only get your boyfriend back but to rediscover yourself in the process. I thought the best way to go about the rest of this page would be to take an in-depth look at each step of the ex recovery process starting with your break up and what to do immediately after it.
Ok, before we do any soul searching or serious strategizing you are going to have to implement the no contact rule. If you don’t believe in the no contact rule then all I can say to you is that you had better start believing in it.
Right after a break up is when you are at your emotional peak and I don’t mean a good emotional peak, I am talking about anger, hate, basically everything that Yoda from Star Wars said to avoid.
Your ex boyfriend is probably going to start wondering why you aren’t talking to him and possibly may even begin to miss you.
Knowing what caused your breakup is important because it can give you an idea of where your relationship went wrong and how you can possibly correct it in the future. However, I would say that the average man will leave a relationship when his is no longer getting what he needs. Another thing that you always hear guys saying is the fact that they are constantly nagged to death by their girlfriends.
Nagged To Death = A man looks at this as if his woman no longer is satisfied with what he has to offer or bring to the table. Ouch, I know this one must definitely sting to hear but it is a legitimate REAL reason for why he may have broken up with you. A lot of times what can happen is an ex can realize what they missed about you once they are settled in with their new person. A huge misconception out there is that because you did the dumping it is a lot easier to get back with your ex. Everyone always thinks they could do better until they go out and realize that the relationship they had before wasn’t so bad. A while back I was dating someone and it always seemed that we would fight over the silliest things. One thing that needs to be made clear is that if you are going to seriously invest the time and effort to get your ex boyfriend back you are going to have to adopt a new mindset.
The big goal that you should strive for is to create a relationship with your ex boyfriend that is not only new but better. To a casual observer that may sound really risky but personally I love women with that belief that after they get their boyfriend back they will be with him forever. So, the big take away that I want you to get from this section is that your ultimate goal assuming this process works for you is that you are discarding your old relationship and creating a new one that is stronger. If you can’t already tell I truly do enjoy helping women strategize on how to get their ex boyfriends back. As a general rule it is good to have a legitimate reason for getting back together with your significant other.
If you break your no contact period agreement (talking to him in any shape or form before the 30 days are up) then you have to start your 30 day no contact period over.
Ok, so those are pretty much the most basic things of the big NO-NO’s of the no contact period.
Alright, so the biggest thing I want you to focus on for the no contact period is the fact that you are using this month to become the best version of yourself that you have ever been. First things first, you are going to become the sexiest version of yourself that the world has ever seen. You can change your hairstyle- I’ll admit, I am not a hairstyle guru but everywhere I researched claimed that this was an excellent tactic to looking good for your man so who am I to argue with the experts.
Get in shape- There is no argument that you can make to me to say that this isn’t a good idea. Clean up your diet- Again, this is another great way to feel better about yourself and notice how it is the opposite of sitting around eating ice cream all day. Clean up any skin problems you have- If you have excessive acne or any unwanted moles you can get those taken care of. So, now that you know what changes you need to make physically lets talk about arguably the harder thing to improve, your mental state. Focus on work- It is good to distract your mind for a while and what better way to do that than with work.
Write in a journal- Sometimes your mind is constantly racing with thoughts about your ex boyfriend and since you can’t talk to him for 30 days it might be a good idea to jot your thoughts down in a journal.
Have fun- If your friends invite you out to a party or club I would recommend that you go out and have fun with them.
It shows you are moving on- In a strange way you kind of want your ex to know that you are on a date with someone. It can build up your self confidence- Dating other people helps you feel a little bit more confident. It will help keep your mind off your ex (probably)- When you are busy you have less time to mope around or think about your ex. It will cure any phobias you may have developed- Women who haven’t been in a relationship for a long time may feel a little worried about meeting someone new. Studies have shown that 90% of rebound relationships don’t work out in the long run so the odds are probably in your favor. You may notice that a lot of what you are doing during the no contact period is working on bettering yourself. As stated above, I personally prefer texting over any method of contact for a number of reasons. Actually, in my research I found that a lot of experts recommend calling (after the no contact period.) I have read multiple stories of women who have actually had some success with this method.
I don’t know about you but if I got a letter out of the blue from an ex girlfriend I might be a little creeped out. You should try to create a message that is so interesting it is impossible for your ex boyfriend not to respond.
Since things went positively you can contact them again in a few days and talk for a little bit longer. Alright, assuming you successfully engaged your ex boyfriend and got a decent response you can move on to this section. First things first, this is not the part where you are going to try to get your ex boyfriend back. Think of it this way, if you do this set of messages correctly then you have a good chance of getting your ex to feel the same feelings you are feeling and they will start to remember how great your times together were.
When you write your text message to him you are going to have to go into details instead of just writing something general.
Alright, lets say that I was trying to get an ex girlfriend back and I had made it this far into the step by step process I am outlining here.
Choice 2: “Do you remember the night where I loaned you my jacket at the football game?
Sometimes asking your ex a question can work well to get them to remember a good experience.
More often than not if you have gotten this far in your conquest to get them back they are going to respond back positively. Ok, so you sent out your text to remind them of the good ole days where the two of you were as thick as thieves but they haven’t responded yet. If you haven’t heard anything from them yet and it has been past a couple of days then this could mean a couple of things. Whatever the case is just simply take things down a notch and start a few more harmless text messages where you just make first contact.
You have to be really careful because if this is done wrong then your chances of getting your ex boyfriend back drop drastically. Well, now you are going to implement a number of small heart to heart chats in various different ways that are going to change your fortune in a positive way. One of the little things I always love about relationships that are going well is how you are constantly helping each other remember things.
This tactic may be a little harder to implement because it can sometimes depend on the situation that your ex is currently in. Your best bet here is to take out a sheet of paper and write down all of the things that you have ever appreciated about your ex so you have an inventory to dive in. Plan your phone call when you know that your ex boyfriend will have a moment to talk privately. I researched a lot on this section and discovered there are two types of very different methods to making this important phone call. This one is risky and may not get you a yes to a meet up but it allows you the ability to try again later whereas the method below this one pretty much lays your cards on the table. I have often wondered if there was a method in which you can employ to regain your ex boyfriends trust. The majority of the women who visit this website have one goal, to get their ex boyfriend back. This particular guide is going to be focusing on one specific aspect of the entire boyfriend recovery process, trust. If you are looking for a more complete step by step method on how you can get your ex boyfriend back then you aren’t going to find it on this page. Check Out Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO.Want to Know EXACTLY How Likely You Are to Get Your ExBoyfriend Back, in Only 2 Minutes?
The real truth about men is that there will be some that will not trust you no matter what you say or do.
I guess the real question becomes what causes these men to not ever be able to forgive a woman and trust them again?
Lets say that I was dating a girl and she cheated on me but she didn’t go as far as to sleep with another guy, she just ended up kissing him.


The fact that his girlfriend didn’t invite him to the party really upset him and made him mad. Luckily, she just wanted some time away from my buddy and her friend had invited her to the party. Well, my buddy got so worked up over it that he crashed the party which in turn caused one of the greatest couple arguments of our time.. The main point here is that for the next few months my friend held this incident against her.
Five years later and they are still together and this incident isn’t even mentioned anymore. So, while it may suck for a guy to hold something against you it is just a matter of expecting it to happen and enduring it, it won’t last forever. It really is a sick practice but there will be some men that will react this way when they feel hurt.
You see, whenever you do something that I don’t like I am going to bring your past mistakes up out of anger as a way to control you. In this section we are going to be talking about all the ways in which a (now) ex boyfriend may have lost trust in you. I think the main point I want to make here is that there are literally thousands of different things that someone can do to make you lose trust in them. Now, before I start getting into the ways that you can butcher your exes trust there is a concept that I need to explain to you. It’s pretty much common sense that if you cheat on your boyfriend it is going to be a whole lot worse than telling a little lie to him. 2 = Regaining trust will be challenging but it can definitely happen if you put work into it.
If you reference the MPI scale above you would notice that this means that if you perform this type of trust mistake you are going to have a very hard time regaining your exes trust. It is going to make him uncomfortable and insecure every time you go out and are around other men. I think that when you are dealing with an ex boyfriend anything from 2nd base or beyond is going to be considered a 5 on the MPI scale. Just like with the section above an ex boyfriend is always going to have your cheating in the back of his mind so that is some headwind you are going to have to face here as well.
Of course, I am the type of person that always tries to find the silver lining in tough situations.
While it is never good to cheat (that shatters everyone’s trust) if you cheated just by kissing another guy then you are going to be in a much better position.
If you look at the human species purely from an evolutionary perspective you can learn some interesting things. When you understand these principles it isn’t hard to figure out why men feel the need to cheat.
We already know that one of the main reasons that men cheat is because they get horny but women often cheat for other reasons. Hopefully that sheds some light on a subconscious level on why humans feel the need to cheat. Before I say anything about lying I just want to point out that I created an entire guide on lying here. Every time you say something and want to be taken seriously you won’t be because your ex will doubt how honest you are being. So, I suppose the question becomes how can you make your ex boyfriend believe you when you talk to him about something serious?
At the beginning of every new relationship I think that both the man and the woman are obsessed with eachother. Lately I have been wondering why we as humans feel the need to control people in relationships. The truth is that when it comes to relationships it is impossible to control your significant other. The thing to remember about all of this is that it is very possible to gain your exes trust back. Of course, I do want to point out that there will be one difference in the things that I am going to be covering. I wanted to start with this one because this is probably the hardest thing to come back from. Because in order to gain back his trust you are going to have to make sacrifices and these sacrifices are going to have to be made with no guarantees that you will succeed in making him trust you again.
Unfortunately, blind faith is something that very few people have but honestly it is the only way. Now, if you had cheated on me (which caused a breakup) I can tell you that I would be checking up on you from time to time. Now, for someone trying to get their ex boyfriend back a little jealousy can be a good thing.
Don’t worry all this ignoring other men is going to pay off but you will have to wait a bit to see how.
Some women believe that giving a man some space to work out his feelings is the best way to approach the situation. Well, I am a fan of apologizing if you did something wrong BUT I am a fan of doing it in the right way. If you don’t know what the no contact rule is then I recommend you visit my guide on it.
By cheating on your ex boyfriend you have shattered any fantasies that he has had of you thinking that you were the only one for him. Everything I do has to be done with one goal in mind, to make him think that I am the only one for him. It would be a little weird if out of the blue you texted your ex boyfriend this big long apology about how you were wrong and how you feel horrible and blah blah blah. This is why I recommend doing a brief 15 day no contact rule so you can pre-prime your ex boyfriend. Well, in order to get the best results with anything regarding trust you have to make sure your ex is in the right mindset to talk about it.
I am going to give you an example of how I would compose this message but first there are a few things I want to note.
Hopefully if you do this right it will get him thinking that you have turned over a new leaf and he can start taking the necessary steps to potentially start trusting you again. If you lied to your ex boyfriend getting his trust back is going to be a lot easier than if you cheated on him. You see, women love it because they know when they look a man in the eye and he is telling the truth they can trust him and having that feeling of trust in someone is irreplaceable. This entire site is all about playing games to get your ex boyfriend back that’s just the way it is.
Lets say that you were to use a 30 day no contact rule after you break up with your ex boyfriend.
If you followed it like you were supposed to then you have had absolutely zero contact with your ex for 30 days straight.
In fact, one of the reasons I put so much time and effort into this site is that so someday I won’t be controlled by the 9 to 5 lifestyle that so many men my age seemed to get sucked into. Well, she was a bit of a flirt and after a certain amount of incidents occurred I had a lot of trouble trusting her with anything. I am not like that anymore thankfully but the only reason why I am not is because I felt so ashamed of how I acted that I worked really hard to not be controlling anymore. Controlling someone often leads to a fight and I am not talking about the type of fights where something gets accomplished. You can do all this work to change but if you can’t convince your ex boyfriend that you have, how is he going to trust you again? I promise you that your ex boyfriend knows this so he is automatically expecting you to come back begging and be overemotional. Of course, the real question you are probably wondering is how do you let him know you are not controlling after the no contact period is up? This is a clever little text message that I talk about in my book that you can use to demonstrate two things.
Basically what you are going to do is wait until you have established a conversation with your ex. Trust is very important and it needs patience and courage on both sidesion building it up again. Kidding aside, in building trust, you have to make up with your wrong doings and keep your word this time.
I finally admitted all of that was a lie and then explained the truth but at that point my boyfriend was really mad. My boyfriend of nearly 2 years and close friend for probably 5 years before dating, says he has been hurt very deeply by what I have done. This fact was evidenced when I opened up my Facebook Page one afternoon and saw this meme posted by one of my subscribers,Want to Know EXACTLY How Likely You Are to Get Your ExBoyfriend Back, in Only 2 Minutes? Essentially, what I am shooting for here is a way to wipe your slate clean with your ex so that you can give yourself the best shot of getting him back. In this section I am going to talk a little about that but I will also be giving you the low down on all the negatives that go along with being clingy and needy. In fact, your jealousy got so bad that at one point you literally forbade me to talk to anyone of the opposite sex. It is rare to find someone who will explain why men react badly to clingy behavior but I am going to because I am a man and I know how I would react if someone got overly needy.
They want a serious relationship with a woman who is confident enough to know that she actively chose to be with a guy. As our relationship wears on I begin to notice that you get jealous any time I mention another girl.
In fact, if you ever catch me texting another girl throughout our relationship you threaten to break up with me. In some cases it is so extreme that you can’t even let them leave a room without you going by their side.
I remember he once told me that when he was over at her house she left the room without him. We need time to recharge sometimes before we can consume everything you want us to consume.
If you feel the need to accompany him everywhere he goes then that is a form of shadowing and he isn’t going to appreciate it. Lately, in an effort to change this I have been reading up a lot about the most successful relationships so I can get some positivity back in my life which in turn will help me give out better advice.
Whenever I am in a relationship with someone I don’t let anyone threaten that relationship. I feel this is an extremely rare quality in men now-a-days and it also says a lot about my character. Well, below you will find a graphic that i put together that will teach you how to overcome his reservations about taking you back because of your clingy nature. However, once the relationship has already commenced then the women take over from there and do everything in their power to keep the relationship going. In other words, they grow lazy and spoiled and get used to women doing everything for them. Well, I am of the mind that giving your ex space (after you have been clingy) is the smartest thing you can do. Of course, when you shower a man with constant attention that attention is going to lose some of its value over time because he is going to get used to it. The no contact rule is perfect for giving your ex boyfriend time to cool down which in turn is going to increase your chances to seem less clingy and also get him back. How about the fact that a lot of women don’t believe they are good enough for their boyfriends so they shower them with too much attention which can be viewed as clingy. In fact, I became so frightened of being deceived that I started plotting out worse case scenarios in my head and trying to figure out if I would be able to survive if it ever occurred to me. You see, it has the ability to make you a little paranoid and that can be extremely unhealthy. This means that for me I can sometimes get touchy when other men are introduced into the equation around my relationship. It’s not ok to just stop something that you love (your hobbies) to make room for all of your boyfriends or husbands hobbies. I caused fights over him not texting me back quickly and it got to be too much for him, so he broke up with me. We were in an on & off again relationship becaus, simply put, I was needy, clingy, controlling while he has always been uncertain about me.
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I promise you're gonna miss me being there, putting up with you, refusing to give up on you.
Ironically, a lot of the stuff out there that makes these ridiculous claims offer no value and leave you feeling taken advantage of.
This page, while amazingly detailed, won’t have every single step that you will need to successfully get him back. I put a lot of work into this page (1 full month to be exact.) I read relationship books, I took notes on speeches that dating experts gave, I bought online products, I listened my friends tell me stories about what they did to reunite with their exes and tested out some of the things I learned. The no contact rule is going to give you time to work on yourself and calm down a little bit so you can think more rationally instead of emotionally.
Make sure any interactions you do have with the person are short, pleasant and to the point. Thus, it is entirely possible that whatever reason they gave you for the breakup may not be completely true.
No I am not talking about sex here (although that can lead to problems for some men.) I am talking about admiration.
They love the newness of a relationship, want respect and like to see significant interest coming from females. I feel for you but don’t worry we are going to take a look at your breakup and figure out the best way to approach things. This is a common complaint among men who are dating someone who let themselves go a little bit in the relationship.
Unfortunately, in my personal opinion it says more about of his lack of character (unless you were really boring but I doubt that) than anything you actually did. Now, I like to think that I am generally a calm person but for whatever reason my girlfriend and I would always fight. This may sound goofy but I like those women who so strongly believe that they are going to be together with their exes for good that they are willing to try anything.
Those are the type of women who work really hard to create that NEW and BETTER relationship. However, one thing that I have neglected to mention so far is that there are certain women (not you) that don’t have legitimate reasons for wanting to get back together with their boyfriends. The fact of the matter is that you can be perfectly fine without this person if you are citing any of these. Remember how you are going to implement the no contact rule for a month (30 days?) Yes, well you are not going to just sit on your butt and twiddle your thumbs during this time.
There is a 100% chance, especially if you are ignoring him, that your ex is going to check up on you during this period and instead of sulking around feeling sorry for yourself he is going to see a strong, sexy, fun-having woman! I know it may be uncomfortable to talk about but in this case you need to suck it up and get the proper treatment if you don’t want them.
One of the biggest assets about the no contact period is that it gives you time to calm down a bit from the mental tension that was your breakup. Careful though, you don’t want to be one of those career first women and lose sight of your goal.
Ok, basically if there was anything fun that you used to do (tennis, golf, puzzles, collecting, hiking, photography, music) renew it. Honestly time is the number one thing that can help you get over a break up but the second best thing is definitely having fun.
Instead of being completely miserable and depressed you are doing something constructive and dare I say having a bit of fun? I am not saying it’s going to be easy but doing what I recommended above will really help to heal you.
The last thing you want to be is perceived as creepy or stalkerish and writing a letter the wrong way can definitely hurt you. Well, it just so happens I have come up with the ultimate game plan for getting your ex back.
Controlling the conversation is key that means that you should always be the one who brings the conversation to a close, YOU WANT TO BE IN CONTROL. Typically you want your ex to only think about the most positive experiences during your relationship. Don’t expect him to be receptive of your messages right off the bat, it may take a while. DO NOT SPAM YOUR EX WITH TEXTS… if he doesn’t respond to your first one just wait a couple of days and try again. It really sucks and can feel like the end of the world especially if you put a lot of work into getting your ex boyfriend back.
I’ll admit that you will have a distinct advantage here if you had a long relationship and made a lot of great memories. I took out a sheet of paper and wrote down what I thought our best couple experiences were together.
Except this time you are going to engage them in a conversation but make sure that you don’t go too fast. They are either extremely excited by the prospect of moving forward with things and they can sense that you are trying to move things along but this also makes them extremely nervous. You spent that entire time working on yourself becoming more and more confident as the days past. I don’t have any research to back it up but I feel it will work because it worked on me.
You just planted a seed of doubt in your ex boyfriends head and now he is going to wonder if you saw a romantic movie with a friend or with a date. This tactic is no different and can definitely earn you some huge brownie points if you remind him about something he forgot.
Basically you are going to bring up a stressful event very gently and show that you are going to be supportive no matter what with NO STRINGS ATTACHED. Except this time instead of slipping in a compliment during a conversation you are going to slip in something that you have always appreciated about your ex. Ok, basically this is a tactic where you tell your ex boyfriend what you miss about your relationship.
No matter what happens all you have to do is talk to a man and he will trust you with his heart and soul. For example, if a woman cheated on me multiple times with multiple different men I am not sure I could forgive her for that.
Remember, trust is really important to most guys (especially when it comes to good looking women who get hit on a lot.) I would say that you should expect a guy to hold whatever you did (to cause him to lose trust in you) against you for a while. He would always bring it up whenever they got into a fight and cited it as a reason for why he couldn’t trust her. These are the type of guys that will literally bring up your mistake for the rest of your relationship.
While both of these examples can cause a boyfriend to lose trust in you one is definitely worse than the other.
The main problem you are going to be facing is that for the rest of the time that you are with him he is going to constantly think back to that time that you cheated on him. Well, in my opinion for you it’s all about showing your man that he is just that, your man! While it is true that women can get horny they have a problem that trumps their horniness, pregnancy.
Cavewomen on the other hand have to be more selective with who they sleep with because the consequence of being pregnant always looms.
So, if you really want an in-depth look at the male mind and lying you might want to check it out.
When you feel so possessive of a person that you feel the need to tell them what to do, how to act and what to wear. Make no mistake about it there is always going to be someone, that deep down, we wish we could control. They like the thought that there is a woman out there that cares enough about them to control their actions. If you look at the mistake section above you will notice that there are 4 major mistakes that I cover. In other words, you are going to have blind faith that what you are doing is going to work.
Well, actually YOU are the reason you are in this predicament if you cheated (in any form) but still, those other men are to blame too.
I would do this through mutual friends, Facebook or whatever other social networks you are a part of. However, I think in the case where you cheated on him a little jealousy can quickly turn into anger and leave him with a bad taste in his mouth.
It doesn’t have to be forever it just has to be long enough for you to try the method I am about to outline. Others are stern on their decision to contact their ex immediately and go on an apologizing rampage. In my opinion the best way to handle the situation is to do no contact but knowing all I know now (as compared to when I started this website) I don’t think a full 30 days NC period is required.
So, instead of apologizing immediately (when you know that your ex boyfriend is angry at you) you should apologize after the no contact period is up. That fact alone is some serious headwind that you are going to have to overcome to get him to trust you again. You may have the urge to, right out of the gate, go into some long explanation for why you have changed and how all you care about is him.


I have actually gotten these before (after I have been wronged) and I can honestly say that it just annoys me.
This means that you are going to have some work ahead of you because right now your ex boyfriend can’t trust anything you say. So, instead of pretending to be something that they aren’t they just be who they are and aim to be brutally honest with women. How well do you think it would go if you immediately sent him this long message declaring everything you were feeling and being honest about it? Now, we are going to assume that the conversation is stimulating so both of us are engaged in it.
So, that automatically makes your ex boyfriend think you are being honest with him (which you are.) Secondly, it also creates a good feeling vibe. If you can’t get rid of it then there is no way you are going to be able to get your exes trust back. I would talk with the owners of the franchises and they would often tell me that the employees were the problem but after doing some homework it became clear that THE OWNERS were the problem and not the employees. I am talking about the type of fights where things get thrown and loud voices turn into screaming. Most of you already know that I am a huge fan of the no contact rule but especially in this type of a situation where your ex boyfriend thinks that you were way too controlling. However, if you are smart and implement the no contact rule for 30 days it is going to start making him think that you have changed. Maybe in your relationship with your ex boyfriend you weren’t ok with him hanging around a certain friend.
3 weeks ago we fought over a stupid thing at my place and we were both getting really angry. We are in a long distance relationship and we were face-timing when my phone vibrated because I had a text message.
I had never lied to him before but now he questions everything I say, because I lied to his face. I don’t think he will ever believe me again and it was all because I did stupid, stupid things… I don’t want to lose him please help! You see, as a man I can tell you that, as weird as this is going to sound, I like a woman to be a little clingy or needy. On top of that you would literally get angry if I wouldn’t respond immediately to your texts.
However, if you have become so clingy or controlling that you literally have to go with them from room to room then that is a big issue. So, when you think back to you and your exes fights what was it about you that he was complaining about that could be classified as clingy. As a result, when a breakup occurs they almost expect that YOU are going to be the one that contacts them first begging for a second chance. So, rather than getting overly jealous I am always telling myself that I am setting such a high standard that no other man can compare. I am near to the end of my NC (22days) and during my relationship I was clingy (been working on that and other aspects). Also I think you should implement a 30 day no contact since you were a little over-whelming during the relationship. The break up struck me as a surprise because a few months before that he was telling me how he’d marry me.
To provide resources, aid and comfort to women and children who are victims of domestic violence. The keyword there being SIGNIFICANTLY and before you get all argumentative I have seen the tactics outlined on this page work time and time again.
It is such a complicated process that even the 10,000 words on this page can’t cover everything you need to know. Yea well, I only took a look at credible sources and every one and I mean EVERY SINGLE ONE recommends the no contact rule. You are constantly complimenting him and giving him acknowledgment that he is wanted by you. Again, I want to reiterate this point- don’t assume that the reason your ex gave you for the break up is really why they broke up with you.
You may have to put in some extra work here but trust me when I say that your physical appearance is easier to improve than your personality so don’t let his thoughts get to you. The last thing they want is to hurt you so they will just break up with you and give you some general reason. Trust me, your going to have to do a lot of work, perhaps more than the women who were dumped. First off, your boyfriend surely will feel worried about incurring your wrath whenever they want to do something. I would say think very carefully if this person is worth getting in a relationship with again.
Make sure that you are very serious about wanting to get back with this person before you keep reading. No, you are going to work towards your goal of a new and better relationship by focusing on the one thing you can control, yourself!
Honestly, I am getting excited here because this is where you start taking the first steps of getting your ex boyfriend back.
The first thought I have of our encounter will be based on the choices that you made during the 30 day no contact period. I was dating a girl and after we broke up I happened to run into her at a Starbucks and even though we had a short friendly conversation I couldn’t take my eyes off of her because she just looked so gorgeous. However, even if you are a workout fanatic don’t let your breakup change that side of you. This section is going to be all about how to get through your breakup and heal emotionally.
Remember, focusing on work in this particular case should be used to take your mind of your ex boyfriend. Don’t worry though because I am going to go through every single step in a very-in depth manner. Every single relationship is unique and may require unique steps that I haven’t outlined.
How you approach this first contact message is almost as important as the text messages later in this process. Your best bet in these situations is to simply not respond at all and understand that your ex is still processing their emotions.
If your relationship was brief then this part of engaging your ex may be a little bit more challenging. For the sake of this page lets say that me and my ex had an experience where we were watching a football game outdoors and it was really cold. Everything seemed to be going fine until you hit your first road block with a negative response. Nevertheless, if you get a response like this you just have to be polite, positive and collected.
Some of you may not agree with this but everywhere I researched said that using your ex boyfriends jealousy to your advantage is one of the most powerful things you can do. I am recommending that you drop certain hints in your communication with your ex boyfriend that you are out meeting new people. One thing that always made me a bit jealous (even though I never voice it) was when a girl I felt really strongly about has a bunch of pictures with a bunch of different guys on her Facebook profile. Knowing when to slip them in will depend on your gut feeling and the context of the conversation you are having. Your ex boyfriend might not be as receptive to meeting you somewhere extravagant and out of his way.
The obvious advantage to this is that he has time to clear his schedule and make time for you ;).
Everything that I write about on this site is something that I pour my heart and soul into. I would like to introduce you to my complete guide on how to regain an ex boyfriends trust. My E-Book, Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO will pretty much teach you everything you need to do to get your boyfriend back. I honestly think that if that happened to me I would be able to forgive a girlfriend for it BUT it would take some time and I would hold it against her for a long while… maybe forever.
You may think that the mistake you made hurt them and maybe it did but I think there is more to the pain.
So, when a woman actually does something hurtful to them instead of forgiving her down the road they hold it against her to punish her. So, if you read through this and are unable to find a situation that lines up perfectly with what you are experiencing don’t freak out. That number will dictate how hard it will be to get your ex boyfriends trust back if you committed that particular mistake.
As you can see from the title of this section I assigned the cheating by sleeping with someone an MPI rating of 5. It is in a mans nature to find as many partners as possible and ensure the survival of the human race. Even with the introduction of birth control this evolutionary feeling of being pregnant is in the back of the head of every woman.
Of course, the initial obsession that both the man and woman feel will eventually die down.
It is up to you to show them that being with you is in their best interest and you know how you are supposed to do that? Trust is something that is earned over time so you are going to have to really put in the work to earn it. Imagine if I checked up on you one day and learned that you were always hanging out around other guys. Of course, if you are a no contact period for 30 full days your ex boyfriend is likely to get very angry at you if you keep ignoring his messages during that 30 days.
Well, this whole site is full of information on getting on good terms with your ex so do some digging. So, the main goal in this section is going to be to find a way to make your ex boyfriend believe you when you talk to him about anything serious.
Most of us are still under the impression that all women want is to hear what they want to hear. So, he is going to associate the honesty of the conversation you are having with good feelings and that is an excellent thing.
When I would sit down with the owners and explain to them what needed to change they would generally try their best to change and maybe things did change..
What you need to realize is that being with someone who actually wants to be with you is a far greater reward than being with someone who you controlled to be with you.. You aren’t the person that he thought you were and this is good because the person he thought you were was controlling. Somewhere within this conversation you are going to ask him what he is doing tonight and then you are going to suggest an activity that you may not have been ok with during your relationship.
So I lost it and told him that there were only two options: solving this problem or him leaving my house and that that would mean the end of the relationship. If he was not looking good at a particular day you wouldn’t say he’s ugly straight to his face right? Basically, you have to be honest with almost everything you say and do and convey it in a loving and patient way. 1st time I lied about a stupid issue cz I didn’t want to upset him and he forgave me after.
I told the same lies to others to gain the same effect, acceptance via someone feeling sorry for me. He says he is failing at moving past what I have done, and wishes he could, but is not sure how. I liked that you wanted to be around me all the time and I also liked that you texted me a lot. It isn’t necessarily a fast process but there is proof out there to back up the claims being made. I have been running this site for quite some time and get an incredible amount of emails and comments every single day. This may sound a bit mean but you are going to have to be completely honest with yourself and possibly look at things that may make you uncomfortable. Personally, cheating to me is a big no no and I don’t think I could forgive that so easily. Careful though, don’t let them talk you into calling him before the no contact period is up.
The second your ex boyfriend picks up (if he even picks up) you have to be on your toes and there is a lot that can go wrong.
To make matters more complicated you can’t get into a full blown conversation with him yet. It doesn’t necessarily mean that all hope is lost it just means you may need to be more patient and try again in a week or so. However, that doesn’t mean anything bad it just means you might have to get more creative. This just means you misread the situation and you moved a little to fast to start bringing up your relationship. The obvious disadvantage is that you are laying a lot of your cards on the table and rejection will certainly hurt your feelings. I suggest getting coffee at Starbucks with chairs and couches where the two of you can just sit and talk. The key is to just do something that the two of you will both enjoy where you can have fun and talk.
I am dedicated into making Ex Boyfriend Recovery THE premier ex boyfriend site in the entire world.
Probably the coolest thing about the E-Book is the fact that it will guide you through what to do STEP BY STEP! As a way to regain that control I am going to use your past mistakes as a bargaining chip to not only give you a massive guilt trip but as a way of making myself feel better, a way of gaining more control over you. Once we start getting into the actual ways in which you can work on regaining your exes trust you are going to learn that the tactics I teach can be applied in almost every situation. Now, if somewhere down the road you find out that I lied to you it is probably going to hurt your feelings and you may doubt if I am telling the truth from that point on. For arguments sake lets say that the mans feelings start to normalize but the woman still feels the initial obsession. If you are too controlling to a man like this you will probably wind up with a 3 on the MPI scale. The reason for this is that I have combined the two types of cheating that I discuss above into one. He will call you names, say hurtful things and probably not want to talk to you again for a long time.
To make matters worse any time I checked your Facebook account I would see you out with with other guys. He definitely won’t think that you only have eyes for him if he sees you eying other guys.
It hurts so bad because we used to be so in love and happy and suddenly it’s just over. Each person wants me to give them a detailed step by step plan that they can follow to get their ex back. Every time you have a good experience or something of that nature you are putting money into the account. A lot of times women make the mistake of picking up right where they left off whenever they do get their ex back. The further away from the breakup your ex gets the more nostalgic he will become about your relationship.
So, from this point on I am just going to be focusing on that method and the best practices using it. So, if your gut is telling you that a particular tactic I have outlined won’t work for you I would definitely trust it.
Because, if you screw this part up you can kiss your chances of getting your boyfriend back goodbye. This is simply a small baby step that you are using to test the waters and gauge where you are at.
If your ex boyfriend would get jealous every time you would talk to another man or every time you went out then I would say you should really revisit your thinking on getting back together with him. Do you think you will get very far if you rub the fact that you are out and about with other guys?
More specifically, setting up a date with your ex boyfriend for the first time since your break up. This can become dangerous because that obsessiveness can evolve into possessiveness and that is not a healthy place to be. Remember, lying is what got you in trouble in the first place so you need to take the opposite approach here and just be honest with him. I know that it took my boyfriend finding out to stop this very bad behavior I had developed at some point (likely after my first marriage, in which I was involved with a much older man that was a petafile.). However, this situation is quite different and as you always mention each relationship is unique. The fact of the matter is that it is such a complex process that I really can’t give you everything you need in a post, email, comment or Facebook chat.
However, every time you have an argument or a fight you are taking money out of the account. Every expert (myself included) seems to have a different opinion on the method you should use for contacting an ex. However, I would say the biggest advantage to text messaging would be the fact that you can take your time and think everything through. The main takeaway here is that you are going to have to get creative and sometimes even skip entire skips depending on how fast you are moving. Honestly, the dates I have enjoyed the most wasn’t anything super romantic it was just when I was enjoying the company of someone else and walking around.
When we begin dating for the second time you are under the impression that I have forgiven you for all your mistakes but deep down I have not. I work very hard to gain that kind of trust from women so when they try to control me it really upsets me. Anyway, long story short I bought the car and he said he would help me pay the taxes when they were due totaling $1500.00. The key thing here is to have more green deposits than red withdrawals in your relationship bank account. Some recommend writing a get your boyfriend back letter, some say you should give them a call and some even say you should text. There is a subtle art to incorporating jealousy texts into your conversations and I am going to teach you that art.
The key is to be really subtle about it but trust me if your man has a Facebook I promise you he will check your profile from time to time.
The truth of the matter is that if you played pretty close to the game plan I laid out for you, your ex boyfriend will probably have suggested to meet up IN PERSON by now.
In fact, I am holding your mistakes against you the entire time we are together in our new relationship. I know I was wrong and I feel terrible about it, but I was honestly scared to tell him the truth (I did not cheat on him). I am not only holding them against you because I am hurt I am also holding them against you as a way to control you. The next day I spoke with my boyfriend and I told him how much I missed him and he told me missed me a lot too. Well, he knew that was a lie because our phones vibrate once for a mail and twice for a text so he knew it was a text before he even asked.
I was aware of this but everything he did was negative around me compare to the other deaths (which I was with him during these death..
So we were almost getting back together but I don’t like having secrets so I told him about the other night and he just lost it. We discussed in June that I did not have the money and he said he could help me with half of the money. I know it will take me a VERY long time to regain his trust and I am willing to work extremely hard on that to get him back. In late August he began paying me 100.00 per week from his business because I took care of all billing, phone calls, post office errands etc. At the same time, I was thankful that it was out in the open and I could move past the behavior finally.
And should I note that this is a long distance relationship of 3years and therefore I hardly see him. I tried NC but called him after a week and all he kept saying was that I cheated and that he was too hurt to see me. Two days later we agreed on going out and he said he wanted to try again and confessed to me he slept with another woman, and that he wanted to leave everything in the past and start over.
My tags expired on my car at the end of August and I would have been driving on expired fictitious tags had they not gotten paid. Then last weekend he called me to tell me that someone called him and told him about that night and that I didn’t tell him the whole truth (I did tell him everything) and now he’s mad again and we “broke up” again but this time he says he doesn’t want to see me ever again and that he can never ever trust me or forgive me for breaking his heart.
He’s always been very proud and kind of vengeful and holds lots of grudges, and he did say to me very rude stuff.



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Comments to What do you say to your ex boyfriend that you miss him

  1. SEKS_MONYAK — 28.04.2016 at 20:46:13 That the aim is NOT to have life but looks.
  2. BaKINeC — 28.04.2016 at 20:38:47 May not work all of the time where they're from she's identified for being.