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I’ve received a lot of queries lately from people asking how they can get revenge against their Narcissist that left them.
One of the most difficult things to cope with is watching the one that hurt you, trot off unscathed, while you are left writhing in agony. Your enemy is a predator, he feeds off of the emotions and kindness of those closest to him. Smugness:  When a Narcissists pulls one over on you he’s feeling pretty good about himself.
Reason: How do you reason with someone that twists the facts and has an aversion to the truth? Guilt: He may very well owe you something, but how do you make someone feel something they are incapable of feeling? Character Assassination, Assault, or Property Damage: You can cause Narcissistic Injury, which is any slight real or imagined that threatens their ego and sense of grandiosity. When you are involved with an abusive, malicious ego maniac the best course of action is to take the high road and do nothing. Understand that when someone has walked away from you – they have told you all you need to know about their feelings and what their intentions are. And remember, while you may think you got the short end of the stick, you can heal yourself and go on and have a healthy happy relationship with someone else– he cannot. So after all this, if you’re still bent on payback, recognize that what a Narcissist fears most, is being ordinary, unimportant and forgotten. Savannah Grey is a writer, a certified hypnotist and has degrees in both Journalism and Psychology. Please note that all material on this site is protected under copy right and cannot be reproduced, in its entirety, without the author's permission.
Someone with narcissism may engage in an affair as a way to get revenge for a partner's wrongdoings. The relationship between revenge and narcissism is complex as the personalities of narcissistic individuals can vary drastically. Narcissism is a broad term that is used to describe a range of different but related psychological phenomena and conditions relating to self-love and self-esteem or, more often, to self-obsession and exaggerated self-importance.
A variety of different psychological theories give possible explanations for the connection between narcissism and revenge-seeking behaviors. Narcissism and revenge-seeking behaviors based in narcissism tend to develop from various aspects of a child's upbringing. He blocked us at our apartment community with his car and banged on my window and swore and yelled obscenities.
Would someone go to these lengths if they would possibly hire someone to do this, if seeking revenge? I worked with a man who didn't seem to be narcissistic, but once I saw how he sought verbal revenge on anyone who said anything to him that he perceived as criticism, I began to believe otherwise. When people are angry and hurting and they realize that they’ve been duped, lied to and manipulated, it’s normal to want the person responsible to feel what you’re feeling.
When you are ignorant of the enemy but know yourself, your chances of winning or losing are equal.


He lies, manipulates and cons to get his way.  He is disconnected from his emotions, feels a sense of entitlement and has an impaired ability to feel remorse or guilt. When he sees something, he wants it and he goes after it, but if there are obstacles in the way they can be a source of great irritation. He quickly develops a tolerance to people and objects and his head is on a constant swivel looking for anything, or anyone shiny and new, that will generate a new thrill. They hate the objects of their obsession and they hate themselves for being dependent on the supply they provide.
Just get the hell out of Dodge and don’t look back and deal with your pain on your own.
When you’re obsessed about sticking it to him and all you feel is rage and hurt, the universe will reflect back to you what you’re thinking and feeling. You may quote an article, but in so doing, you must provide a link back to the website and provide the name of the author. According to some psychological theories, most notably Sigmund Freud's psychoanalysis, some degree of narcissism is necessary for healthy psychological development. One individual may be insulted and may seek revenge because of a gesture or word that was not even intended as criticism or as an attack, while another may only respond in a vengeful manner to direct criticism, constructive or otherwise. Freud, for instance, posited that the various early traumas in childhood sexual development were responsible for narcissistic personalities that could lead one to feel a need for revenge for perceived wrongs. Children whose parents gave them excessive praise for even trivial accomplishments, for instance, tend to handle criticism poorly and may even respond poorly to a perceived lack of praise. If your praise for, and your pride in, those 'little' things is real, then it is love, and can only do good.
The man said something to my husband like he knew someone who knew me and basically slandered me and told us not to mess with him. So before you start plotting out a method of revenge there are a few things you should consider.
What a Narcissist possesses are pseudo emotions, lacking in depth and substance.  Every demonstration is superficial and short lived.
The ifs and whens are not consistent, so you never know when it’s coming, or the level he will take it to. Any time he can confirm to you and himself that he’s smarter and more superior, he will feel a sense of delight that looks and feels a lot like gloating. When people don’t dance to his tune and acknowledge his superiority he will become exceedingly annoyed. They would rather be alone and avoid humanity all together, but their incessant need for attention and admiration makes that impossible. Because their thoughts are completely self-centered, It doesn’t compute with them that you have feelings.  How they’ve made you feel is completely irrelevant to them.
The more intensely you focus on anger and hurt the faster the universe will deliver more people and circumstances that will evoke those feelings in you. An individual who possesses an exaggerated sense of self-worth, often referred to as a "narcissist," is often unable to handle criticism or perceived attacks on his self-worth.
The relationship between narcissism and revenge can also vary in terms of the methods used for vengeance.


Other theories of narcissism and revenge are based on the narcissist's need to control his external environment as much as possible. Children who, on the other hand, receive constant harsh criticism may also find it difficult to handle criticism as adults and are likely to perceive attacks in casual comments or even in compliments.
I think that what is being referred to is false or unnatural praise, where the parent sees the child as an extension of themselves. I've always been criticized by my parents while growing up and felt that I had to be perfect because of it. When someone criticizes me, even if they're right, I feel so angered and I start hating that person. He is a projector and likes to pass off his feelings onto others.  Anger is commonly used as a manipulation tactic, or as a control mechanism to keep his minions in line and on their toes. Do not expect concern or compassion when a Narcissist is inflicting his brand of torture, expect him to feel pleasure while he twists the knife. He becomes consumed, thinking about it night and day, working himself into a fevered pitch, until of course he grows a tolerance to it and boredom sets in.
To the Narcissists sense of grandiosity we are all objects, whose sole purpose is to provide him with amusement and adulation.
When they have behaved badly, you can bet they’ve found a reason or a hundred that it’s entirely your fault. A Narcissist likes to know he can still affect you – positively or negatively, this is a source of Narcissistic Supply, so showing how much he has hurt you is a win, win situation for him. They may cause you physical harm, lay criminal charges, or they may cut you out of their lives rapidly, so that you can’t do any more damage. Such an individual may become angry because of such perceived attacks and may, therefore, act out in revenge. Revenge is aimed at those who attempt to usurp that control and can be seen as an attempt to reassert control. Such individuals may use revenge as a tool to re-establish self-worth and to re-assert their control over their environments.
I've been at the receiving end of it. And trying to get revenge from a narcissist is out of the question because it makes things even worse. I don't do anything to harm them but I try to get revenge by distancing them from me or ending my relationship with them. Narcissism and revenge are, therefore, often closely connected as a perceived attack on a narcissist's value may lead to an act of vengeance. Could this have been a instance of mistaken identity by him or could someone have put him up to this? Narcissists can be very hurtful but trying to get revenge from them makes them even more revengeful. And I'm capable of doing this with everyone, even family members. The weird part is that I don't see anything wrong with any of this.



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