How to get your ex girlfriend back after a big fight crossword,dreaming you are back with your ex,winning a girls heart back ground,romantic quotes for boyfriend pinterest - 2016 Feature

admin | How To Get A Ex Boyfriend Back | 21.10.2015
Of course, as time ticks by you begin to realize just how much she meant to you.  How in love with her you really were. Before you sent that text your hopes were so high, you were daydreaming of your future together with her.
So, the question you are probably wondering is how the heck are you supposed to navigate a situation like this where you want your ex girlfriend back but she has moved on to a new boyfriend.Do You Even Have a Chance of Getting Your Ex Back? I suppose the best place to start is by taking a look at the potential risks of trying to get an ex with a new boyfriend back. For example, you obviously came to this page because you want your ex girlfriend back and she has a new boyfriend.
Men, by nature, are very protective of their women so I guarantee you that to the new boyfriend you trying to get his girlfriend back is going to paint you in a light where you are an enemy. So, obviously the big risk you run by trying to win your ex girlfriend back in this case is that you could become a common enemy between your ex and her new boyfriend which will ultimately cause them to be closer together.
Being a common enemy between your ex and her new boyfriend is one of the worst positions that you could possibly be in.
If you can be subtle but effective in your intentions to win your ex girlfriend back you will most likely NOT be looked at by your ex as a common enemy. Lets say that you are very subtle in your intentions to get your ex girlfriend back but over time your methods start to work. Inevitably she is going to talk to the one person who is supposed to support her and understand her no matter what, her boyfriend.
She may not be completely honest with him about what is going on in her mind but she is going to say things to him to try to test him to see if he is ready for the truth.
Eventually the truth is going to come out and how do you think the new boyfriend is going to react to discovering that his girlfriend (your ex) is still hung up on you? In fact, a massive fight or breakup might occur and now you are looking like you are in a really good position. Again, YOU didn’t physically cause this breakup or fight, your ex did because of her feelings for you.
So, I am not going to sit here and tell you that if you follow every little step I outline on this page that your ex girlfriend is going to break up with her current boyfriend and come running back to you. Ok, let me put this in simpler terms so you really have a good grasp at what this page is going to do for you. Imagine for a moment that in every single breakup that occurs between a couple a certain percentage is assigned to it. You may have noticed that I gave people whose exes have moved on to another man a 20% chance of getting back together.
Well, that 20% number is based on you trying to get your girlfriend back without any of my advice. Imagine that you follow the advice on this page and get to a place where your ex girlfriend is confused about her feelings for you and her new boyfriend. Anyways, I think it’s safe to say that your ex girlfriend is going to be comparing her relationship with her new boyfriend to her relationship with you. If your ex girlfriends new boyfriend does that during their relationship and you didn’t during yours with her then when she is going to make the comparison between you and her new guy she is definitely going to think the new guy is better and that is going to put you at a disadvantage. Because usually a girl who has a better guy isn’t going to leave him to put herself back in a situation where she is treated poorly. One of the biggest assets I can bring to you with this page is my experience in dealing with thousands of couples.
That some of these women want their exes back even after they have done HORRIBLE things to them. For example, there was once a girl that came to my other site, Ex Boyfriend Recovery, who was dating a new guy but wanted her ex back even though he cheated on her six times with six different women. So, what did this guy (who had done horrible things to her in the past) have that drew her in so much that she wanted to leave her perfectly good boyfriend?
At first that was what I thought but the more I talked to her about her particular situation I began to realize that there was something else going on in her head.
In other words, even though some women find themselves in a situation where they are clearly better off relationship wise sometimes the appeal of the connection can trump everything. For example, if your ex girlfriend has a new boyfriend that treats her like a queen she may still be more drawn to you because she has a connection with you that the new boyfriend can’t top. So, if you were to ask me how to get your ex girlfriend back in a situation where she has moved on and her new man treats her well then I would say you would have to hit her where she will be affected most, her romantic feelings for you.
Like I said, a comparison between you and the new guy is eventually going to happen no matter what it just a question of when.
Well, lets pretend that your ex girlfriend has been dating her new boyfriend for 2 months exactly. Then that is a very good sign because it means you are winning the comparison battle against her new guy.
If your ex girlfriends new boyfriend isn’t treating her the way a woman should be treated in a relationship then she could soon be maneuvering to go back to the thing that makes her feel better than anything, YOU! Believe it or not but your ex girlfriend moving on may actually be a good thing in the long run. For example, if your ex girlfriend breaks up with you and starts dating someone new who treats her really well like we talked about in the comparison section above your exes GIGS is going to be verified and as a result it is going to be much harder to get her back. I want you to be aware that the GIGS exists and could have been a possible reason for the breakup between you and your ex.
The game plan is divided into four major steps and as usual I will be giving you a lot of in-depth insight into each one of these steps. First though, lets take a look at the steps you will need to successfully complete to even have a chance of getting your girlfriend back. I have been doing this for quite some time and I have seen firsthand how hard it is for some men to stay in NC when they see their woman with another man. If you could compare a relationship to a fire a woman would expect the man to start that fire. One of the greatest fears for men who enter into the NC rule during this situation is that their exes are going to get so close to their new man that they will completely forget about their old one.
Ok, imagine if you completed your no contact rule and called your ex and begged for her back. I know that may sound a little controlling or possessive but the truth is I honestly don’t care at this point. I know that may sound weird and counterproductive but if you really think about it, it’s not. Like I said above, it is very rare for a man to be ok with the fact that his girlfriend or wife is good friends with her ex.
In other words, you becoming friends with your ex is going to cause your exes new man to go absolutely ballistic when he finds out that she is talking to you and this is what you want. Providing emotional support for your ex girlfriend (when you become friends) is really where you are going to shine. If she can’t get the emotional support she needs from her own boyfriend but from you then when she makes that inevitable comparison between you and the new guy she is going to take that into account. A big mistake I see a lot of men making is the fact that they jump into the deep end instead of wading into the shallow one when it comes to building attraction. Ok, lets say that you are trying to get your ex girlfriend back and she has just gotten a new boyfriend. I am a fan of a subtle build up with text messages which eventually lead to phone calls which eventually lead to a face to face meeting.
Using the guide in the link above you should be able to properly build attraction with the build up technique.
So, don’t take it personally if your ex declines your offer to meet up for a hang out. Because a woman who is truly in love with a man wouldn’t do anything to jeopardize that relationship. Luckily for you, if she accepts your offer for a casual hang out, it means that she doesn’t care enough about her current boyfriends feelings to not hang out with you. My name is Chris, and I help millions of guys per year improve themselves, and get their ex girlfriends to come running back. My question is do i give her a hundred percent NC with the possibility she will think i have moved on and confirm the thought of me being only jealous. Before I go into the details of her situation I do want to say that often times I have no idea on whose question I am going to answer for the podcast.
Other times I listen to each one very carefully one by one and pick out the situation that I think people would want to hear about the most.
There was a lot of emotion in it and you could tell, just by listening that she wanted her ex boyfriend back. Welcome to the ex-boyfriend recovery podcast where we help you get your ex back and have the fairy tale ending you deserve! I asked him originally if when he got home, if I can have a month or so to work it out and not to give up on us. Hey, I wanted to take a moment and thank you Morgan for having the courage to tell your story. Today’s episode features a woman named Morgan who has a bit of a problem with her ex. But, so basically what this men could do to get their exes back as soon as possible and kind of the game plan I came up with, shortened the strategy that I teach on both website significantly but still the shortest strategy was 30 days. Even as great as my advice may be and as many success stories as I have had over the last several years that I’ve been running these websites, even I can’t guarantee.
Now, with that being said, if you’re willing to take a long approach, if you’re willing to accept, “Okay, I’m probably not going to get him back by 6 pm today but it doesn’t mean I’m out of the game. Now, that post a serious issue because one, she would never take me seriously as a suitor because I live in Texas and Pennsylvania is pretty much like 1700 miles away. So, I pretty much would be there alone the entire time and all we had was a desk with my computer on it to work and a TV and I remember literally just staring at the clock hoping it would be 5 pm or 6 pm and she would come home because it was sort of like being in jail for a little bit because I just didn’t know what to do with myself. I think just maybe, at his age, because he’s a lot younger than I was, I think maybe 5 or 6 years younger total of when I’ve ended up moving.
No contact rule is going to be essential for you but that’s pretty much essential for everyone but after that really everything follows the same strategy.
Then the next step is building attraction through text messages and then next step is to build attraction  through phone calls or Skype or Facetime or video chats and then the third step is the in person dates. Well, if you don’t have a lot of money, you probably work at a job that doesn’t pay a lot and probably works you like a dog. Now, if you knew a month ahead of time that you were going to meet you ex up at this certain date then the flights become a little bit more inexpensive which is kind of the strategy I would recommend for you to approach. Now, let me tell you a little bit more about my personal experience with this method because I have actually done this method with my wife. Maybe you can try to set up kind of a critical mass of attraction through text messages and phone calls where you kind of have this unspoken agreement where you’re not going to talk to other people when you set up this date maybe a month in advance or something. I had my wife’s family which now they are my real family because I married her but at that time it’s such a drastic difference because I didn’t have any friends besides my wife.
So, getting the human element, hearing people talk about their exes and how much they want them back and how hurt they are by the break up. We hear from a woman who wishes to remain anonymous who has found herself in a bit of a pickle. There’s—I think something like four free giveaways of content and pdf and I do the success story report where I took a lot of my successes and figured out exactly what made them successful. I just want to take a moment and thank you for having the courage to put your situation out there. I can maybe buy into the thinking that he doesn’t know what he wants to do with his career. So, make sure when you implement the things I’m going to tell you about that you don’t do anything stupid like this because I’m not going to lie to you. That could be a contributing reason for the breakup but you hurt yourself when you told him that you slept with someone else because going forward now, he’s going to question everything you say.
So, they know exactly what they have to do to get their ex back in their situation and I was writing I think what was like a hundred pages and I was super excited about this.
So, approaching this situation, basically if you’re going to deliver bad news to your ex boyfriend or if you’re going to bring up something negative, do it when he’s in a good mood.
Sometimes when people mess up on the no contact rule, they go back to square negative one because the no contact rule losses its effectiveness but you, since you really didn’t do the no contact rule that much, it’s not going to lose much effectiveness. Well, I mentioned that he’s going to be questioning you every single time you tell him something now because in the back of his mind, he’s still going to wonder if you slept with someone. Let things unfold naturally because you’ve already proven that he wants you back and I really think you have a great shot at getting him back. Not to put yourself in a position where he can look at you say, “She’s not trustworthy.” And that sometimes means not going out to a club or something with your friends if they’re going to take pictures, post it on Facebook.
Alrighty… It’s time for another episode of “The Ex Boyfriend Recovery Podcast!” Awesome, right? I am currently in the process of writing a massive guide about going on dates with an ex boyfriend when I stumbled across this question from a woman who wants to remain anonymous.
Anonymous and her boyfriend have been broken up for a few months and she has done a phenomenal job of sticking to my advice. Her ex boyfriend is currently in possession of a record that she wants back and her ex actually called her to set up a day where they can meet up and he can give it back. Welcome to the ex boyfriend recovery podcast where we help you get your ex back and have the fairy tale ending you deserve. Now, you may be asking yourself, “Well, how can this book be specific to my situation?” Because without a doubt, that was the number 1 complaint. And I am structuring the book in a certain way where it creates a game plan for you to follow and then based on your situation, it’s going to teach you how to alter that game plan to fit your needs perfectly-- long distance relationships for example. And I am structuring the book in a certain way where it creates a game plan for you to follow and then based on your situation, it’s going to teach you how to alter that game plan to fit your needs perfectly– long distance relationships for example. We’re trying to create this family atmosphere where we help everyone, where we get and respond to everyone but enough about that. You know I was taking notes and my wife she was sitting right next to me and she stopped everything she was doing and she was listening as well which is kind of rare for her and then after you were done talking, she literally turns to me and goes, “I really like her voice. So, that’s when I knew for sure that I definitely had to feature your question on the podcast but anyways, you have done a pretty good job at advancing to the point you’re at currently. I’m of the mind of the value chain where you have to start off slow and kind of slowly build up the attraction into a point where it boils over and he just can’t not be in a relationship with you.
I’m actually writing a really good article coming up about this very kind of question that you asked, which is another reason why I picked your question because I’m literally writing an article about it and when you were asking about how to handle the date or what you do during a date, I just thought it was a perfect match for what I was already currently working on. But it seems to me like you’ve already advanced to where you’ve locked down a date with your ex boyfriend.
So, when it comes to dating you shouldn’t operate under the assumption that it’s going to take one date to get your ex-boyfriend to agree to be back in a relationship with you. So, one of your big questions was should you ask him to hang out because you say he’s operating under the assumption that he’s just going to give you your record back and then that’s going to be it.
I’ve talked about this a lot throughout ex-boyfriend recovery and it’s sort of ending the conversation at the high point.
My wife the other day, she sent me this really interesting email and specifically, she’s in charge of Youtube and she wanted to do a Youtube video on make up and dressing up clothes and everything like that.
It’s funny… I am currently in the process of writing a massive guide about going on dates with an ex boyfriend when I stumbled across this question from a woman who wants to remain anonymous. Time has a funny way of making us realize our mistakes and without a doubt letting your ex girlfriend go was a big one. You figure the easiest way to do this is to send her a non threatening text message to check up on her.
Of course, after you sent the text that daydream was shattered and replaced with anger, heartache and jealousy. Well, what do you think would happen if the new boyfriend caught wind of the fact that you wanted your girl back?
Of course, sometimes you will get a boyfriend who can tell when something is off without her even having to say a word.
Of course, the situation you currently find yourself in is one of the hardest to experience as your chances for success are slightly lowered.
While that is certainly the outcome that you are praying for it isn’t realistic to assume that, that is going to happen 100% of the time. However, with that being said it doesn’t hurt to have an expert on your side (me) who has seen so many situations and put so many relationships back together that he can drastically increase your chances of succeeding in almost any situation. Now, most of you who are in that situation are going to see that number and immediately freak out because it’s pretty darn low. Well, all of a sudden that 20% chance of success is bumped up to 50% because you know eventually she is going to have to choose between you and her new boyfriend. I am talking about someone who provides emotional support, someone who listens and tries not to judge, someone who truly cares about her and she realizes it. You see, I have a sister site to this one called, Ex Boyfriend Recovery, where I have helped thousands of women. You will need to find a way to get her to tap into those feelings for you and when she does that is going to dramatically increase your chances of having her run back to you.
Humans in general are drawn to things that make them feel good and flee from things that make them feel bad.
If your ex broke up with you because she thought she could do better and discovers that she can’t then all of a sudden she is going to be scrambling to get YOUR approval.
Well, if you find yourself in a situation where you are trying to get a girlfriend back who has a new boyfriend you may find that waiting 45 days in no contact is too long.
While I am not a fan of becoming overbearing or annoying but I don’t think there is anything wrong with doing very subtle things to remind your ex that you are out there. Perhaps I am a bit jaded because I have seen so much with regards to exes and I know that any time that exes are friends it usually doesn’t work out.
If you can get her to open up to you and trust you enough to let you in then I guarantee that you are going to come out looking like a star. When I talk about providing emotional support I am not talking about helping her with her own relationship. Of course, in order to do that successfully you have to create this build up to gain the attraction momentum that you need. It just means that she is being a good girlfriend to her boyfriend and she shouldn’t be punished for that. If she says she wants to get back yes, but other than that, if it’s just a casual hi, nope.
During this time i tried a few times to get back together, but never really putting much effort. I try to give her space recently because the prom is coming up and he asked her but i keep getting told everything thats happening with them and i gave after a few days of not talking and text her.
Basically, I was quite aloof in any relationship, – you could say defensive, so I dont get hurt and a relationship adds on to my life and not be my life in total. I just want to make it clear, the other guys started texting her while you remained texting even after you called off the engagement right? She started with asking for a piece of clothing and I said that I would look for it (in our final phone call a few days ago, she said to throw away all her things). Either she loves you both and she prefers to stay with the current because she feels more secured with him.. The Ex Boyfriend Recovery Podcast is one of the most popular self help and sexuality podcasts found on the market today.
First he agreed but then changed his mind in things that we cannot be fixed because there was nothing wrong with our relationship.
It just means I’m going to take a much different approach.” If you’re willing to accept that, I think I may have a game plan for you where you can be successful. So, my mindset at that time was a little bit more mature even though like I said, I was little naive and thought the move would be easy.
It could be millions of different reasons but what I personally think from drawing upon my own personal experience is he felt maybe a little uncomfortable in this new area and didn’t really quite have the guts to stick it out and set his roots his down and kind of normalize and it certainly takes some time to get there but you will get there eventually if you stick it out.
And I like to teach these three date method where you go on a smaller date then a medium date then on a romantic date but that’s where the long distance relationship strategy kind of alters a bit because getting a date with an ex who’s states away isn’t easy. Build up a critical mass of attraction in the texting phase and phone call phase and then when you have the critical mass built, I want you both to set a date and stick to the date where you go out and get plane tickets maybe a month away until where the plane tickets are affordable and you’re not paying—dropping $700 to a $1000 on a plane ticket for a weekend where you see your ex, where you’re not even guaranteed to get them back. Ultimately getting him back is going to be contingent on getting either together in the same state or working out some sort of commitment where you have a deeper commitment like marriage or something but no matter how you slice or dice it, you’re going to have to get back on the same state so, maybe that means you have to be willing to move to him.
I didn’t really know anyone again besides my wife and her family and I didn’t really have a support system to kind of fall back onto.
I really tried to provide as much personal experience in everything as I could to your situation but if you’re asking my professional opinion as a relationship consultant. I wanted to thank you for taking the time to listen to me ramble on Morgan and all of you who are listening and listening to ramble on with Morgan, thank you so, so very much. It’s good for me to help me understand you better and as a result, hopefully I can just continue to give good advice to everyone who wants it. We have had a lot going on lately and I kind of neglected getting new content out there but I am going to work really hard to stay on schedule of posting one of these episodes a week.
If this is your first serious boyfriend, I’m assuming you are his first serious girlfriend and at that age, if you’ve only experienced one person or you’ve only been in a relationship with one person. That can be kind of a tough thing because society has kind of painted men into a corner where men are the providers. You had him in your hands, I don’t know what you were thinking with regards to trying to make him jealous or make him upset by telling him that you slept with someone else. I know I’ve been kind of getting onto you and telling you what you did was not a smart way to approach it. I think for him to even ask that question of you in the first place means he’s worried about it. Thus, she is wondering how to turn a meet up that's supposed to be about a record into a date where they can hang out.


I kind of took a break last week, mostly focused on Youtube and creating videos because I really--I guess it’s fun to be on camera.
I am actually in the process of rewriting my most popular book- Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro and this thing is going to be a behemoth. You know like, “The book created this nice little template for me to work in but it doesn’t speak directly to my situation.” I’m glad you asked that. So, yeah, I’m super pump about it, you know we just finished writing a new book-- The No Contact Rule Book. Thus, she is wondering how to turn a meet up that’s supposed to be about a record into a date where they can hang out.
I kind of took a break last week, mostly focused on Youtube and creating videos because I really–I guess it’s fun to be on camera.
So, yeah, I’m super pump about it, you know we just finished writing a new book– The No Contact Rule Book. When I am choosing questions to feature on the podcast, often times my wife whose desk is sitting right next to mind, listens to me listen to all voice mails and you’re particular question, when I was playing it, listening to it, I was interested in it.
To me it looks like, you’re maybe rushing a little too fast but I’m not saying you shouldn’t go get your record or anything like that. So, congratulations for that and I’m going to do everything in my power right now to help you on the date. So, I think a lot of my effort or focus is on helping those people at the beginning of the strategy but that doesn’t mean we should leave out the people who are the end of the strategy– dating. You know you go on what I like to call kind of a small date, the medium date and then large date or the romantic date and he still hasn’t asked you to be his girlfriend again. I think if– I would always let my wife dress me because that’s how bad I am at dressing up. She sent me this really interesting email about what the clothing says about you and what the color of the clothing says about you.
You see, on the one hand she has strong feelings for you and on the other hand she has strong feelings for her current boyfriend. Obviously we are hoping that the new boyfriend is treating her horribly so you look like a prince but lets just say that, that doesn’t happen.
I think it’s safe to say that I have heard just about every single story there is when it comes to breakups. Besides, men often have to be the hunters when it comes to relationships so that means that we have to do all the work to get the relationship started or re-started in your case. You have done a shortened NC rule, you have worked on re-establishing your friendship with your ex.
What I want to do now is to show you how you should go about creating this perfect build up. Keep building the attraction until she chooses to leave her current man in favor of the better option, you. Back in December, 2011, I convinced this friend of mine to be my girlfriend, and then the next day, I got too nervous and chickened out of the relationship. I was trying to give her space to figure out her feelings for herself but instead she got the impression that i wanted nothing to do with her.
She also said she would not date him but i can tell that she has fallen for him probably because of my pushing.
But, there this girl happened and she swooped me, demanded I give her more attention, and infact I did like someone bothering me much and making me show the love. Seiter takes real life situations on one by one and provides valuable advice that have helped thousands of women find the peace (and success) they are striving for. If you could please give me any kind of advice before 6 o’ clock, that would be amazing but if that’s not.
And we’re going to do everything we possibly can here in the ex recovery family to help you. So, I understand that this is may be hard for you to hear because I think everyone who can listen to this and everyone who can you know, hear your voice knows that you’re in a really emotional spot right now and I can just tell you really want him back. I’m just sort of the medium or the bridge between your mind and his mind and to what he may be thinking. So, the only way that we could make our relationship work is if I move to Pennsylvania and that’s what I ended up doing.
I think I read somewhere that I don’t know, it takes like a year and a half to—maybe even like 3 years I read one time, to like settle down when you are in a new place. And you know, my wife and I we weren’t married at that time but then we got married and we had a baby and our life turned out really, really incredible but it wasn’t easy that move. Well, to be honest with you, I’ll just approach this like a long distance relationship breakup. The in person meet ups are a much bigger deal when it comes to long distance relationships. You need to focus a lot of your time and effort into building attractions through those methods and then after you feel like you have built this critical mass of attraction, that’s when you push to meet up in either a neutral state or neutral place or you visit him or he visits you. If you have a job, you have to be willing to maybe take a vacation day or if you don’t have a job that’s great but that brings up to the next point, you need money. We obviously were trying to meet up because we were in a relationship maybe 6 months before I moved in with her.
You know, set up a date where you visit each other and you know—with a normal break up I often say well, the best way to do is there’s got to be three dates, the small date, the medium date and the romantic date. If he’s comfortable and you think you can undergo the physical and emotional stress of moving such a long distance and not knowing anyone and being alone in a certain extent, you’re going to have to try to take some of ‘those risks perhaps or you know it’s sort of a talk that you and your ex have to have when you get to that point but don’t ever talk about that until maybe you see him in person or you got him in the best possible mood you can possible get in and you’re far down the road in the ex recovery process. I think that’s a complete mistake because ultimatums never work and you are self imposing an ultimatum on you.
Got a little busy, we recently released a quiz on ex boyfriend recovery.  Basically, that defines what kind of chance you have of getting your ex back.
I know a lot of women are scared to do that but I think the women who do end up having the courage and the women who are lucky enough to have their question picked on the podcast, get a lot of value out of what I say because I spend basically 20 minutes talking about that situation. You believe he’s going through a quarter life crises which I’m not quite sure I buy it all. I know not necessarily anymore that women’s rights have done a lot for equality and things like that but if you look at the numbers men still earn more than women.
I mean I can understand why you did it because maybe you’re upset that he broke up with and you wanted to hurt him that way that he hurts you. I was telling people on the emails, I was telling people on the comments, I was telling people on Youtube, I was telling my wife about it, I was telling my dad about it. Specifically if you should do the no contact rule in your situation and you seem like you’re really well read. Now, the biggest misconception about the no contact rule, that I found to be lately is a lot of people just use it to focus on their ex boyfriend but that’s not what it’s for. And there’s a lot of more interesting things going on but the podcast is still near and dear to my heart. Today’s question comes from someone who wanted to remain anonymous but she has a real interesting question that I don’t think I’ve ever covered on the podcast before. I’m going to give you certainly tips on what to do during the date but I would say, after the date, focus on building more attraction before you see him again in person.
You did the no contact rule which is phenomenal but where I think you fell down a little bit was the attraction building through texting and then after texting you have to transition to phone calls. So, when it comes to dating your ex, if I were to pick out one of the weakest parts about ex  boyfriend recovery, it’s the fact that we feature a ton of advice on the first parts of my overall strategy for getting an ex back, for parts like the no contact rule, parts like text messaging, parts like talking on the phone but we don’t really talk about dating a lot and what to do during the date. This process will take time which is why I like to teach what I like to call the three date method. Well, you just have to interest him, you’re right about being chill and not bringing up really bad memories or super emotional stuff. Especially if there was cheating involved, you should definitely not talk about that but talk about something that’s going to interest them. If it was up to me, I would probably go everywhere in tennis clothes because they’re so comfortable but obviously, I can’t do that. I’m sure you’ve seen this when it comes to like sales and advertising and how like yellow—you know like McDonald’s has red-yellow or something because it catches your eye and it makes you want to go in but when it comes to relationships, it’s really interesting in what the colors mean.
So, if you want him to look at you in a passionate way or you want him to be super into you, red is definitely what you want to wear. Let’s go to the worse case scenario (for you) where the new boyfriend is treating her incredibly well. If she asks you for relationship advice on him I want you to decline as politely as possible.
Eventually the new boyfriend got so upset about this that it has caused a bit of a rift in their relationship.
I fear through my attempts to try and talk to her I have made myself a common enemy of both of them, as she has blocked me on all social media (Facebook, instagram, and snapchat).
I know i wasn’t the best partner and i made a lot of mistakes but nothing really bad but i know what i have to do if i get a chance.
Do i step back and let her see that or do i try to show her the person she feel in love with and hope she comes back? This month of April, I started showing signs of disinterest while still together, I felt she was so needy and emotional. She told me how she is finally doing the things she wanted, that she woke up crying this morning because she realized how happy she is now. There were a couple of bad nights like 2 or 3 during that time but they had to do with drinking. We’re going to be talking about what to do if you find your ex boyfriend has become distant all of sudden. If that’s too much notice, I understand but any help you could offer me would be so much appreciated.
So, I guess, this is going to be kind of a unique episode because I’m going to be bringing a lot of my own personal experience to it because I feel like I can relate to your ex boyfriend on some levels but first things first, let’s talk about the 6 o’clock deadline.
You really care for him and like I said, we’re going to do everything we can to help you but the first thing that I want to try to encourage you to do is not rush this process. So, for your own peace of mind, just accept right now that he’s going to move back but that doesn’t mean that you’re helpless and that you can’t do anything about it. Now, I was maybe a little bit young and naive when I moved because I had just started to come into some success with the websites.
So, what I’m thinking could have happened with your ex boyfriend is that he moved from Missouri, is what you said I believe, to Kansas and the transition was tough for him and maybe you were the one positive part of that move because it takes a while for a human being to kind of sit down under a roof and feel comfortable right? My wife is the only reason I probably got through it but your boyfriend on the other hand, maybe he just got scared a little bit. You can just text them up and say, “Hey, you want a cup of coffee?”, “Sure, let’s go get a cup of coffee.” Well, you can’t really do that if you’re ex is a state away. Now, this poses a problem for a lot of people because I think a lot of the people, a lot of the women specifically who come to ex boyfriend recovery don’t exactly have a lot of money. I just felt like I was—just had my wife and that was it and it takes a while to build that stuff back up. I would say try to get him back, take the long game—if you’re trying to get him back, sorry.
I really appreciate what you’ve done for my websites because without you these websites wouldn’t exist. Maybe you wanted to get some sort of validation from him that he cared for you in a deep level and you certainly got that but it really didn’t do anything to help  you with getting him back.
Telling him or hurting him like this served no purpose for you other than just getting that validation but the fact that he was on a date with you, the fact that it only took a week of ignoring him to get on this date should have been validation enough that he’s still had feelings for you. Even if you tell him that you lied, even if you explained your reasons for lying, in the back of his mind, he’s not going to believe you. I was really excited about this thing because I really thought it was going to be revolutionary but back to the story, the particular day I was cleaning up my desktop and I happened to put the book that I was writing, the book that I spent a month and a half working on into the trash bin and then I clicked on the trash bin and then I erased it.
You lied to him about sleeping with someone else, why you did this, I think my personal belief is you were trying to find some sort of validation that he’s still loved you and maybe you thought this was the best way to bring it out, maybe you were just trying to hurt him.
So, what I think you need to do before you enter the no contact rule is let him know that you were lying. Yes, it is for making an ex miss you, it’s for healing an ex’s feelings emotionally, it’s for leveling you out emotionally and that’s—it’s really a two pronged approach in the fact that, yes, you are using it for your ex but you’re also using it for yourself.
So, here I am again for another week and another episode of the ex boyfriend recovery podcast. I really took a lot of the people who complained about what the book didn’t have or what the book lacked in the past. I don’t know when it’s going to be completed because I want to do a really good job for you but basically what’s going to happens is I have compiled a huge list of all the situations I’ve ever encountered through ex boyfriend recovery.
So, anyways– two year relationship, ended basically in the “Girl’s-a-crazy-this-guy’s-a dumb” paradox thing. I’m not trying to say anything mean to you or put you down or anything like that but if I were to pick on something that maybe you didn’t do as well and you weren’t as descriptive as maybe you could have been but if there is one thing that I can kind of pick at that maybe you could have done a little bit better not relating to a date. As far as what to say, I think this podcast episode is too short to tell you exactly what to say on a date. Now, if you listen to my strategies or read anything on my website, you know that I’m a big fan of slowly building up attraction and the same applies with dating. It just depends on—I know some men out there get really keyed up and they show up a lot earlier. A tv show is an example there that I just used but maybe he has a movie, maybe—I know Game of Thrones is coming out soon which is we’re super pumped for. But anyways, here’s some interesting things that I’ve learned and also that my wife can help you out because now my wife is working full time with the ex-recovery team and she’s specifically really good at things like make up and dressing things up. So, according to this, there are three types of colors that you want to wear on your first date. The second one is perfect if there was cheating involved, specifically if you cheating and, that’s Blue. Now, a really good girlfriend wouldn’t see her ex boyfriend out of respect for her new boyfriend.
Fast forward to the beginning of last year, I realized I still loved her, and then in the fall, I asked her to dinner and she said yes. How do I get her to realize that I truly do need her in my life and get her to start talking to me again and get her back?? I like to believe i have become a better person and know how to treat her now but i think she is scared knowing who she is. I ended breaking up with her again mid month because I did not like that she never put up pictures of us on instagram and facebook.
She said she is even going in a trip to new mexico… that got me curious and I asked if it was with her new guy. We’re going to be hearing from a woman name Morgan, who finds herself in a really interesting situation.
I thought that was a great idea but when he got to Missouri, he started acting weird and distant.
I don’t know what to do and I have until 6 o’clock tonight to find a way to influence him to not just leave and then at least hear me out. I know this podcast is geared towards women and women specifically on ex boyfriend recovery but ex boyfriend recovery isn’t the only website I own.
I know it’s hard but trying to get him back in 2 hours and convince him to stop his entire plan of moving back from Kansas to Missouri is going to be extremely difficult if not impossible. So, maybe he latched onto you and you made him feel comfortable and then he went back to visit his parents and he felt their love and what it was like to be back home and you know he was thinking, “Man, this feels so great.” I don’t think it’s anything against you either Morgan. You know, the answer is—the reason I think he may have potentially pulled something like this is because of the uncomfortableness of moving this big life change blah blah blah… We already got all that. My wife and I just took a trip out to Florida to look for a house to buy and the trip to Florida was not inexpensive. It took me a good maybe two years before I felt like, “Okay, I feel like I’m kind of getting more at home here.” So, if you’re willing to take that kind of risk then I think you should maybe go full steam ahead with what I just tried to explain to you. I would say long distance relationships have the worst chance at success rates than some of the more general breakups just because of the distance can provide so many extra roadblocks to overcome.
One of the things I liked about Morgan’s message was the fact that she kind of got choked up there at the end. Not only is it a really cool quiz but you’re going to get so much value after you sign up for it.
But I don’t want to get into any political debates on what men earn versus what women earn.
I could definitely buy into the fact that he was struggling with this career or trying to figure out his life path or what he should do for a career. Believe it or not, even though what you did was stupid, I think it can serve a purpose for getting him back which I’ll cover in a second. You saw what I said about the no contact rule but how every time you do it after the first time it losses some effectiveness and that is certainly going to hold true but the good news for you is you really didn’t do it. Understand everything I teach about the value chain, about how you want to go from the no contact rule, to texting, to after you build attraction through texting, you move up to the phone calls then after you build attraction through the phone calls, you move up to the dates. I jotted those notes down and basically everything that anyone ever complained about is going to be going in the book.
So, I don’t forget but yeah, we’re really excited to add more products to fray and I have to say, thank you guys for being so accepting of the newest additions to the ex boyfriend recovery team. Build attraction with your ex through text messages and then of course build attraction through your ex through phone calls and eventually, once enough attraction has been build, the date should be easiest.
Of course I write about it in my products and everything like that but for whatever reason, I’ve just never covered that as much. I will give you a few pointers a little bit later but let’s talk about what kind of a template to work in because I always think people look better when they have an overall strategy.
Imagine that you were about to go on a blind date with someone you’ve never met before and then on the blind date, that person asks you to marry him.
Repeat it to where it’s every single date you go on from this point on after that third date is romantic and puts him in the mindset of wanting to ask you to be his girlfriend again but we’re getting way ahead. Baby blue in particular—I know from my sales experience that Baby Blue is the most trusted color but Blue in general shows that you’re trustworthy and that you’re secure essentially. So, as you can see just calling a girl up and asking her out without any of the romance or build up doesn’t usually work.
Now she has fallen for him and tells me she doesn’t feel the same but sends mix singles when ever i see her. She said it was because she didnt feel we went out a lot and felt I didnt put enough effort.
Now, he is telling me that he is not sure that he is in love with me anymore and he is returning to Kansas solely to get his stuff. Now, if you don’t want to take the long game, I completely understand but that’s what I’m going to encourage you to do. I thought I would move maybe from my parent’s house to an apartment, to a house and you know but all within Texas.
I remember when we first moved into our apartment in Pennsylvania, we had no furniture and you know I worked from home and my wife at the time worked for an enterprise, a rental car company. You may have been the perfect girlfriend but still like I said moving that long of a distance or moving and going through this drastic life changes can be really difficult on any human being not just your boyfriend or not just men in general. That doesn’t necessarily apply when you’re talking about long distance relationships because and often times, especially if you’re states away, you almost get only one chance, one shot at goal. That long distance way of getting your ex back Morgan but if you’re asking my personal opinion, I think if you can’t handle the fact that you’ll probably end up having to be the one to move to him in the end, I think maybe it might be time to just let him go and not think about it anymore.
Not that I’m like kind of a dick about it like I like seeing people cry, I don’t but it makes me realize how serious people are about getting their exes back because sometimes I get a little removed from that.
Basically by through hearing other people’s situations and figuring out what advice that I give to them that you can use for your situations. I would think, “Ok, we’ll she’s telling me that and I can understand why she did that but what if she’s just lying about this as well?” I mean this is the kind of headwind that you’re going to have to overcome if you’re going to try to get this particular ex boyfriend back. You did it for  a week and then basically got him back and then fumbled it up before you really got him back.
What kind of hobbies can you pick up?  What kind of things have you always wanted to do but you never did? Well, he’s already going to be very insecure about you or you telling him and lying to him about sleeping with someone else. Just sort of, kind of, if you imagine a graph, it’s sort of like the graph is constantly going up if the graph were to represent attraction of course. I think that’s partly due to my laziness but it’s also partly due to no one really wants to hear about it because where people mostly struggle is in the first parts of the strategy with the no contact rule.
Where I would have a date set up and I would show up maybe 30 minutes early because I was just nervous about it but my point here is you’re trying to go on small date and the goal of this date is to interest him and make him want another date with you.
Because when you have him on that hook, when you have him hooked and you leave, you are putting yourself in a position where he’s going to want to see you again. So, if you cheated or there was cheating involved, blue is definitely the color that you want to wear.
You will always get really good and insightful information from my podcast specifically about ex’s or just relationships in general and also please if you haven’t, write a review. She says the only reason she talks and flirts with me is because she doesn’t want to hurt me and wants to make it easier for me. Well after I broke up with her, she would text me to make sure we are still single, she also wanted to hangout at one point but I kept neglecting her. She also asked me, how was it that I saw her new pictures of her new guy on social media when she made sure she took me off (but no blocking).
But she stood by my side all the way up untill I got out than she broke up with me over the phone when I called her. We want to get this episode out as soon as possible for Morgan, so she can get the advice that she needs to get her ex boyfriend back. I mean, I think on average this process can take between 45-60 days to get your ex back and for those who are listening who are just generally trying to get an ex back or just trying to get, I guess a boyfriend back in any situation you could think of.


She was like a manager there and so she would go to work, probably like at 6 am every single day and then get back at 6 pm or 7 pm. So, if you’re looking for reasons for why he may have broke up with you and why he maybe thinks you guys want different things out of life, it could be that he just doesn’t feel comfortable.
He is moving back to Missouri and you’re in Kansas, so you are basically, if you are going to try and get him back, it’s going to be like kind of a long distance relationship and as far as what to do with the long distance relationship.
Well, I try to see her at least once every single month but that required planning on both our parts.
You have to make your time with your ex as romantic as possible and you have to do a lot of things like leave him wanting more which is kind of a cool thing about long distance relationships. You said you wanted to know about what the appropriate time was to hash things out with him.
So, technically I think it’s going to lose a little bit of the effectiveness for your situation but not much. Seriously, you should go back into no contact rule and to the no contact rule even if you didn’t contact your ex but you didn’t make any personal strides, you should go back to the no contact rule. The first date should be real light, not threatening, but interesting enough to hold his attention to make him think about you.
So, I went out and got someone who knows a lot about it, enough to get me to marry her, my wife. And then finally, if you feel like you want to look slimmer or you feel that like Red looks terrible on you, –these are my wife’s words, I’m just summarizing from the email here I have pulled up in front of me.
She texted me a few days later and asked if I was mad at her and I responded with a simple no. Once i heard my friend was going for her i decided i couldn’t wait anymore and did just about everything wrong. Both were in love and we had to call it off since it wasn’t a practical choice for us.
I wanted to make her miss me and want me, and get back together and start putting me up on social media. That way, let’s hope she misses you, and sees the change and starts to take a chance when you get to talking again.
So, on my other website, I actually ended up writing this really interesting article where I took kind of a mock situation where I was thinking, “Well, I’m constantly getting this questions about people who want to get their exes back as soon as possible.” And they rush through the entire process and more often than not, they fall flat on their faces. We needed to make sure that she could get time off and that you know, I guess I had the money to do it.
I guess one of the biggest positives is a lot of the time that you get together in person is super romantic. I’m not going to say it’s a great shot because I think him moving back to Kansas for you is not as likely and I don’t know how you feel about moving to Missouri and I feel like that’s a decision that you should come to on your own without any kind of prods or pushes from me. Not that my wife and I ever broke up but the long distance relationship itself is so difficult to manage that it feels like you’re going insane sometimes. I’m thinking about, “Ok, if you do this, this and this it’s going to equal this.” But sometimes it’s good to get the human element.
I wouldn't call it necessarily a newsletter but we completely revamped the emails that you get when you sign up for exboyfriend recovery. I wouldn’t call it necessarily a newsletter but we completely revamped the emails that you get when you sign up for exboyfriend recovery. We were kind of talking a while after the breakup and then I finally started no contact and within a week of us not speaking, he reached out to me asking if we could talk.
You mentioned something about a quarter life crisis because he doesn’t know what he wants to do in a career which I’m not sure I buy a quarter life crisis thing.
To be honest the appropriate time is when he’s in an incredible mood, when he is in such a good mood that you can basically tell him that you murdered someone and he won’t get upset with you. So, I was feeling really good about myself and I think my wife, she took the baby to her parent’s house to give me some kind of space to work and some peace and quiet to work basically. Usually I’m very secure about the projects I work on or in a specific area of my desktop where I don’t touch them or they sat there and everything. The second date should take things up a notch and on the third date of course should take things up a notch and then ideally by that third date enough attraction has been built through both where he’s re-evaluating whether or not he wants you to be his girlfriend and he’ll ask you. We’re using Starbucks as an example because I’ve been to Starbucks and I’d know exactly how this can work.
You’ll find he’ll text you more, he’ll think about you more, he’ll say nice things to you, he’ll say maybe I miss you and then you can go about setting up that second date; the medium date which I’m actually not going to talk about because I want to talk a little bit about what you should wear. I encourage you to write a review on Itunes for my podcast and that it’s going to do it for this week’s podcast of the exboyfriend recovery podcast episode. I really want to ask her one more time to reconsider before she gets too serious with the new guy. We did take the call, but then we still kept in touch and we were looking for other opportunities simultaneously, but we still knew where our hearts were.
Now I know what was causing me to drink a lot had to do with the fact I was somewhat insecure because I had a devistating break up summer of 2013 with the woman who I thought was my soulmate and it took me a year and some change to get over her.
So, I took this mock situation to try to figure out what someone could do to get their ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend back, particularly their ex girlfriend since this was for the ex girlfriend recovery website. It takes time and commitment on your part and even then you’re not guaranteed to get an ex back because no one can guarantee you that.
It was actually extremely difficult to move and a lot of times, I wasn’t as happy as I wouldn’t have been, if I hadn’t have moved.
So, yeah I think maybe that could have potentially be what’s going on here and why he’s wanting to move back home. So, if you—I guess what I’m trying to say is building this critical mass of attraction is essential but you know, if your ex is states away, then you’re going to have to catch  a last minute flight when you’re trying to ask for this date and last minute flights are typically notorious for being expensive. So, it wasn’t as much of an issue for me but she also had to come visit me and visit my parents. I’m just trying to tell you what I think and what I think is, I think in the future if you are to get him back, I think you would have to be the one to move to him.
I’m trying to give you a look at every single aspect of this situation and part of that is just me giving you my personal opinion on your chances.
When you do this quiz, you basically get this set of emails that basically defines to your situation what kind of chance you have. And since we’re trying to create this—basically this community where we help people who are trying to get their ex back.
You told him that you slept with someone else to hurt him which obviously it did and you find yourself back at square one. I mean I know they have midlife crises but just to put this to perspective, he’s 26 and I’m 26. I mean there’s nothing scarier than living life without a plan or without a financial plan to back you up. And I did just that, I started working and I started particularly cleaning up my desktop.  I own an iMac and it’s really cluttered.
But here’s the thing, I was in a great mood that day, so even though, it was a horrible loss which I have since started rewriting the book and that I think it’s even better now than it was but even though it was a horrible loss, I didn’t really feel that upset inside because I was in such a good mood. So, I really think you really have a great chance of almost—even though you’re at square one. For you to make a major mistake like telling him that you slept with someone just proves that you are not ready to get him back. Let’s say, it’s not a date, it’s just a hang out with one of your guy friends, Dave and you post a picture on Facebook and he comes across this. Light texting after no contact, although he is very reserved but responding and when our last conversation went right, I asked if he has still had my old records that I lent him and he does and he agreed to meet up and give it back but yeah. So, once you get there early, go inside of Starbucks and then order a coffee or whatever the heck you want to order there, Frappucino, whatever. My wife and I last night, we had an interesting discussion about the bachelor of all things and how the bachelor almost glorifies cheating and how it’s socially acceptable for the bachelor or even the bachelorette to cheat and how it’s such a way of process.
I did spend many weeks trying to figure out whether it was jealousy or if my feelings were real. The funny thing is that she still asked why I deleted her on facebook and instagram a day later.
I gave her the apology about everything that happened that was said and that I wish her well. So, she had to have the money to do that and the time to do that but before we even met before, we met online through Facebook through friends.
So, maybe he can be in his comfort zone but at the same time there’s drawbacks to that because you leave your friends and family.
So, he’s essentially your high school sweetheart and I could factor into all of this in a second but first let me get to your situation.
So, you’re big basic questions here are should you do the no contact rule again and what’s the appropriate time for you to hash things out regarding the issues in your previous relationship and what caused the breakup and things of that nature.
So, I think I have a lot of great insight into what he’s thinking or he’s mindset and at 26 years old, I have not had a quarter life crisis though. And men really take that seriously, so I can buy into the fact that he feels a lot of stress about that but it’s not a quarter life crisis. So, just going forward, if I’m going to help you out, I need to know that you cannot do this again. That’s how important it is to focus on yourself and a lot of women obsess about the no contact rule. So, a lot of women think, “Ok, will getting my ex back, I have to wait ‘til he’s ready.” But that’s not always the case, sometimes he can be ready and you’re not ready.
Well, all you’re going to be doing with that picture or that act is you’re going to be upsetting him to the point where he’s not going to want to be with you because he doesn’t feel like he can trust you. Anyway, she tells me she knows its not jealousy but she said in our last conversation that why now. I asked her if she wanted to be friends and she said yes, I decided to only add her on facebook. I said I dont want to hold any grudges towards you and that she is a great person and doesnt deserve that. So while I was locked up I had time to think and I realized how much my new girl meant to me and that I really loved her and was ready to let my gaurd down and give love another chance.
Part of the reason that I ended up not following the same suit as your boyfriend is that I really had a very deep commitment to my wife. So, we met online through Facebook through friends and we set up a day about two months in advance where we would meet and it was in Florida at her parent’s house and two months is pretty risky for someone you’ve never met but it’s sort of—it was that critical mass of attraction I was talking about.
I’m looking for all sort of lovey dovey adjectives I can think of but—critical mass of attraction maybe the best one. You leave your support system and you’re in this new strange place where you don’t really know anyone. Everything that I’m trying to do is to help you obviously but sometimes I feel a little over robotic in the way that I think now. I can’t guarantee we do in 24 hours but usually within 2 days, we get to you and you get a response. I put all of my work, all the pictures I do and any book I’m writing is on this desktop and  a few months ago I started rewriting ex boyfriend recovery pro which is kind of the flag ship product.
I think maybe, we’re ready to get him back but you weren’t ready maturely wise to get him back.
The name of game here is getting him back but at the same time, showing him that you are the most trustworthy person alive. Sit down at a Starbucks where there’s an open chair near you and then when he shows up, he will come inside Starbucks and then he will see you and then he’ll V-Line towards you and then you’re both sitting, he’ll give you your stuff and rather than asking, “Hey, let’s hang out after this.” You’ve already put him in this position where he’s going to hang out with you. So I dint comment much, but i ensured she made the right choice (not him thought) but you know, continuous talking and sharing stuff will eventually lead you there (this was as well long distance) – Things were fine but then he made a trip to meet her and she infact did like him as well.
But seems I was a day late and a dollar short cause after she broke up with me we were still friends on fb and my other ex that I was dating summer of 14 seen I was single again and friend requested me on fb and since my ex broke up with me I accepted.
In fact, I think we were engaged maybe within a month of moving in and I was just committed head over heels for this woman.
Enough attraction had been built to where we were willing to want to see each other and we set a date to see each other and stuck with the date and I kind of felt like we were dating before we met because we were both kind of committed to not hurting the other person’s feelings like I wouldn’t talk to any other girls at all while I was talking to her because I didn’t want to scare her off and she didn’t want to talk to any other men when she was talking to me because she, one,  didn’t want to scare me off and two, I was the one who had to buy the plane tickets to come see her and she would feel bad if she, I guess flirted or met someone else.
I hate to use that one again but it builds a huge critical mass of attraction on both parties and then all of a sudden one of the people has to go home or both of the people have to go home.
Maybe you do know his family but it’s still not the same as having your family there or having your own support systems or network of friends which is something that I learned myself. We’ve had the limits for some of our responses because I think over the Easter holiday, we had something like 400 unanswered emails. And within two weeks, I kind of prematurely agree to meet with him and we did and it went well.
I mean if you’ve ever gone to sleep deprivation with a new baby, you know what I’m talking about. You need to approach a situation where you bring up your previous relationship when he’s in an incredible mood. Now, those are the three top recommended choices for what I think you should wear on the first date. Because you want him to look at you in that passionate way again but if you want to maybe be more creative, wear Purple. And everything that happened after she didn’t return my feelings happened LONG before I even knew that there was a way to get an ex girlfriend back. Now I dont get those texts which i used to get annoyed about before like why is she texting me so muchhh ?
And she commented on something I posted and my ex seen it and got super upset and sent me a message saying she was done and she just wanted her stuff. So, I felt like we were kind of in this relationship without being in a relationship yet when we were talking and I feel like that is maybe the best strategy for you Morgan. So, we fell a bit behind which is why I actually came in and started helping out my—some of the other members of the ex-recovery staff in answering some of the emails. However, we’ve been—he then asked me if I have been with anyone else since the breakup and I lied and I said yes, just to hurt him and it did. People are going to be more accepting of bad news when they’re in a good mood as opposed to bad news when they’re in a bad mood. I took a lot of the complaints I got from people who bought the book and I’m working them in to make sure their complaints get covered and no one ever has an issue.
She did contact me a couple of times during the No Contact period, but I didn’t respond either time. My biggest problem is i gave her time before and she thought i hated her and says she forced herself to lose her feelings for me.
When we had breaks, she would always make it so that I wanted her back, like she did earlier.
I told her that Im doing ok and that I stopped doing many of the things the she didnt like, like smoking weed – her voice cracked a little and said oh really? So I told the other ex its best if we just stay friends but had to block her on fb cause I didnt want to upset the one I was still in love with anymore than she aready was.
I don’t want to give you false hope because like I said, your chances, it can be as great as some other people’s chances perhaps but I will say, if you were you willing to put everything you have into this, you can get him back for sure.
All you had to do was just build up an attraction and get him back but now that you made this mistake, you had the added headwind of making him trust you because even though you didn’t sleep with someone, if he truly believes that which is like I said, he’s going to question everything, you still lied to him. She called me a couple of times post NC, but she said she pocket dialed me both times and I know she called me on purpose both of those times. Knowing who she is, she does’t like to get hurt, so she tries to avoid it and to me and a few other people, it seems as if she is confused because her friends are telling her to go with this new guy but it seems like she has feelings for me still by the way she acts. I miss talking to her – She made me zone out from the entire world and give her the attention which she needed and I did give and got back the love as well. I then told her that if i could go back, I would change everything to change the outcome of what happened, that it is my burden to hold and that I will live with it for the rest of my life. Well about a week later March 7th (got out on Feb 23 just a lil time frame) my ex changed her fb status to in a relationship and changed her profile pic to her kissing this new guy.
Don’t obsess about anything relating to your situation and I promise things will go better for you. Do I ask if we hang out for a little bit or you know, I’m definitely going to be very chill and nice and positive when I see him, not bring up any heavy memories. I kept trying to text her about things that she likes and how they made me think about her, but I would keep getting a neutral response. She never really opens up in this type of situation, we broke up once before and i was able to show her the fun we had together by hanging out and talking and eventually got back together.
I told her that im not holding any ill feelings towards her and that im even open to the idea of being friends. I know you say it’s less effective the more times you do it and also when is the appropriate time to kind of hash things out and talk about the issues that cause the breakup in the first place?
It does and it makes people not trust others.  So, kind of the big thing that you’re going to have to accomplish here is getting him to trust you again and the best way to do that is not to put yourself in a position where you’re around other guys. Talk about something that you know will interest him and then end the date prematurely on purpose.
During that time she would never she how she felt, she just would give me a dry answer and one day wanted to get back together. But I handled the situation maturly and didnt text her anything rude as a matter of fact I only texted her on Easter wishing her and her daughter a happy Easter. The new guy when they start talking was planning to go to college half way across the country, so he has no plans to have a committed relationship.
She then said she was thankful for the 5 year experience and she learned a lot, that she now knows what she wants and she is doing everything she wanted to do with me, that she was happy. I decided to end the phone call be telling her I had to go, i said i wish you well, take care and bye.
Make it to where—it’s not getting back into ways—I mean a lot of women try to get their exes back—the biggest mistake I see a lot of women trying to get their ex back too soon. I was still kinda heartbroken over everything but was starting to move on even though I still thought about her all the time I was starting to heal. I ended up messaging her that I still loved her and that I wanted her to have my kids like we planned, that we said forever.
So we had a 3 hr long conversation and it went great we talked we had some laughs and it was like we were together again. She gave me a huge paragraph of what I did wrong, and that she did not love me anymore, that she moved on quick, because she realized how ive treated her all these years.
She knows that saying that saying she is happy now with her new guy will hurt me although i never showed that pain on the phone call. So we texted a couple times over the past couple of weeks and than she called me on Friday telling me she was bored so I was working at the time and told her I would call her back after work and I did. That you really didn’t sleep with someone and then after you’ve given that apology, you go into the no contact rule. She said I am definitely not her soulmate and neglected anything i said to get her back, complete opposite of what she would normally do. She ended up calling me at work to tell me to stop messaging her about our relationship, even though I stopped an hour earlier already. So I picked her up after work I offered to let her sleep in my bed and I sleep on the couch but she insisted I sleep in the bed with her so yeah we made love the first night than we woke up and did it again she came to help me on one of my jobs as I have my own construction company and she used to work with me sometimes when we were together.
The following morning she left a voicemail saying that she read over our messages and said that she hopes i move on quick and recuperate, that she was concerned about how i sounded over text since she has never heard me talk like that.
Than I took her to a carnival we ate some food and went on a ride and I won her a stuffed furry animal. Two days pass and Im starting to hurt more, now i want her back really badly so at night i asked her to talk to me over the phone. Than we woke up the next day and I had to go out to look at a job and she stayed at my house while I was gone. I came back and we went out to eat at our favorite restaurant for lunch than went over to my cousins house she is close friends with them and she wanted to see theyre baby which she loves.
I ended spilling my heart out on that phone call, asking her to come back to me, that ive never been hurt by her like this. She said she no longer loved me, when i would bring up making love she said to stop because it made her cringe. We held hands the whole ride and she told me she loved me when I dropped her off and she told me she left me a note on my dresser mirror to read when I got home.
That what she said just a month ago about forever was only because she didnt realize how much i hurt her over the years. The note said my name, I love you with all my heart no matter what we have been through 4ever&always yours, love her name. That she found someone who always listens to her and doesnt criticize her when she needs comfort.
The call ended on bad terms, i told her to tell me that she is going to have sex with her new guy eventually one day at the end, so that i can feel numb and try to let her go completely.
She didnt want to at first because it was none of my business, but she ended up saying it after I pleaded for it. Im so depressed, thinking that she is really happy and I that I wont be able to get her back.
I plan on talking to her in 2 more days to try to briefly make amends and work my way to friendship.
She is the type of person who doesnt like to hurt anyone, so it makes me think she wont want to leave her new guy for me.



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