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admin | Getting An Ex Back | 01.11.2015
Advice from a Twenty SomethingAdvice on life, style, relationships, career, and more from a young woman in her twenties. We don’t get to see each other as often so I wanted to plan a getaway early but he refuses to help, or want any part in planning anything, especially when we talk about what we will do after college. It sounds like he’s avoiding the planning and answering those questions because they are causing him stress. I think you need to have a talk about what is really going on and tell him what you need from him. Because this is an important conversation, I would preface it and say you want to talk through some things with him.

We have had a lot of arguments lately and the reason that is getting to me most is that he never wants to plan anything with me.
I can tell he is in conflict over staying with me and living his life the way he wants… What should I do?
It may not mean that he doesn’t see a future with you, it could just mean that making decisions about the future, like getting a job, causes him anxiety. Plan when you’re going to chat so that you can both put in the time and not be distracted. Try to get him to open up about it — if you’re going to be in a real relationship with him, you need to be able to talk about these things.

It’s important that you are true to yourself throughout the conversation and not driven by fear. You have every right to know if your boyfriend sees a future with you or not, so don’t be afraid to get right into it and find out what you want to know. Often when I bring up going out of town or even asking him if he applied for any jobs, he tends to ignore me completely.

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