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A child can be well into the potty training process, then for one reason or another, either stops, or begins having problems, which puts the process on hold. When you read Kendal’s entire question you’ll see that the big clue as to why the potty training changed was that baby #2 came along.
The child in question was ready and able to potty train and also enjoyed the praise and love his parent sent him when he was successful.
In Kendal's son's case, his potty accidents became more prevalent than his potty successes, and he (most likely) unconsciously changed where he got his emotional pay-off.
Think about how you handle things when you’re disappointed that your child has had an accident? In this case the child knows, because he experiences it everyday, that his lack of success on the potty keeps mom occupied with him. For a child, misbehaving (in this case, regressing his potty training) to get some Parent Pie is not a conscious act; it’s a subconscious act. In order for that to happen, a parent needs to stop being in charge of the toileting like they did when he was in diapers.
Consider loading him up with water, juice and popsicles to fill his bladder so he gets the opportunity to be successful as often as possible. I’m not saying you should ignore him when he has an accident; I’m simply suggesting that you become aware of your words in order to watch the amount of negative attention your child is digesting with his Parent Pie. Sharon Silver is the author of Stop Reacting and Start Responding: 108 Ways to Discipline Consciously and Become the Parent You Want to Be, and the founder of Proactive Parenting.
The views expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of, and should not be attributed to, POPSUGAR.
I find it funny that people assume that the issue a parent has with potty training a boy is all about aiming the pee.
Saturday, April 5 was the 16th Annual Suwannee County Fair “Run-a-Fair 5K” and guess who showed up?  Kole, Kale, Hannah, Fain and several other walkers, runners, pets and strollers were there to get their exercise in for the day.
Kole and Kale participated in the 2011 Suwannee County Fair 5K as well.  Here’s the picture to prove it!
As parents, we need to train up a child in the way that they should go:  spiritually, mentally, nutritionally and physically!! Most of the time the reason lies in the way the child has interpreted something through his immature reasoning. This praise is a subconscious emotional pay-off that works to support his success with potty training, unless it gets misinterpreted. It’s common when a new baby arrives for an older child to begin having accidents or to wish to return to baby status by being in diapers again. The emotional pay-off used to come from the praise, now it’s coming from the comments made about his lack of success. You stop what you’re doing, look him in the eyes, and lower your voice to show him you mean business. His immature reasoning incorrectly has him concluding that mom is choosing him over the baby. As soon as you know that your child has the basic knowledge and experience to go potty, let go.
The issue I had with my son was that he peed just fine in the toilet; but didn't like to poop in the toilet.
When that happens, I suggest parents begin by looking at the situation through the eyes of a child.
Parent Pie can happen with any issue since it’s all about your child's effort to get more of your focused attention. We are chugging along on the alphabet train learning our letters and phonics along the way.  This week we added the letter D train car. It was super hot, but those who came had a wonderful time and helped Zoe's Rescue raise money to save more doggies! I tried everything so he wears pull ups when we go out or he goes to bed even though they are barely ever wet. Stop any negative comments so the child isn’t gaining Parent Pie through negative attention. But, after about 3 months, she had some nasty problems with diarrhea and she refused to use the potty. I asked him many times, "Doesn't it feel yucky or uncomfy to have that poop on your bum and to sit in it?" To which he would simply look at me like I was crazy, and say, "No! I don't mind." Ever tried to MAKE a kid crap on the toilet when he PREFERS to do it in his pants???


Special thanks to Deborah Solomon of "Events 4 Non-Profits" for coordinating our event and working so hard on such a miserably hot day! I spent nearly 3 years trying to convince him to do it in the toilet, and I tried everything too.
A very special thanks to Brenda Shirk for graciously opening her home to Zoe's for this event and for opening her heart and adopting Billie, one of Zoe's doggy friends!!! I read all that is available online about potty training, but I was desperate, I didn't know what to do, until a came accross a guide that saved me. Rewards, charts, potty dances, positive re-inforcement; and when none of that worked then it turned into taking things away. He clearly had no problem with the toilet itself, and he had all the knowledge of the fact that poop went in the same place that pee does, he just simply didn't WANT to poop in the toilet, and I couldn't make him.
One by one they fall down and the children can’t stop laughing when they see or hear one fall to the ground. He finally stopped after getting sent home from kindergarten 2 days in a row for pooping his pants in class; he didn't like the fact that the other kids didn't want to play with him because he pooped his pants, it was embarrassing to him. We are busy drawing the peanuts characters on to poster board so wwe can have our own Great Pumpkin patch for the wall.
Donna, Liam, Sue and Fergus ride the gravy train!Cindy and Zoe tell the crowd about our very special rescue! ?Thank you evryone, especially the Center for Spiritual Living in Simi Valley for your Animal Ministry!
Which, frankly, I tried to explain to him that that would happen if he pooped his pants at school for about a year before he started, but you know kids, they don't listen to their parents! So far we have Snoopy, Woodstock, Linus, and Charlie Brown.The tomatoes are taking over the garden. The children like eating the cherry tomatoes for lunch especially Gideon and Harper, who think they are the yummiest treats.Thanks to Jonathan’s Daddy for picking up our huge bale of hay for the yard.
This incredible love that we share became a labor of love for Zoe and I, as we began the process of opening our nonprofit rescue. The children gathered the hay to make their own scarecrow just like Curious George’s scarecrow, No-Noggin. We have made countless public appearances and even walked the “green carpet” at Zoe’s First Annual Dog Day Afternoon Event. They can’t wait to use their feathers they brought to make their Indian hats and turkeys for ThanksgivingMusic and Movement: The autumn leaves action song. More than two years later, Zoe, my tireless volunteers and I have placed 150 small loving homeless doggies into happy “furever” homes. We treasure each and every one of their “happy endings” stories and how they share that incredible bond with their new doggy, just like Zoe and I.
The months in the year and the holidays we celebrate in each month of October, November, and December.
We are blessed to have gotten to know the special little homeless doggies that have touched our lives more than we could ever have imagined.
By introducing the days of the week, months of the year and the meaning of yesterday, today, and tomorrow we are helping the children to understand the abstract concept of time which they will later apply to math and science learning.
Understanding time and the tools that help us tell time like a calendar or clock are part of the Kindergarten and First Grade Common Core State Standards. But we teach in such a way that learning becomes a natural process for the children and once that is instilled in the children learning becomes not only fun but easy for them. Please consider becoming a foster family if you are able or volunteering in so many other needed capacities.
Soon their knowledge base grows and grows as does their capacity for knowledge.  Where most places take the children to the pumpkin patch one day to pick out a pumpkin we have spent many days out in our own little pumpkin patch watching first hand just how a pumpkin grows from a little seed, to a yellow or green pumpkin, and finally to an orange pumpkin. Please consider making a donation if you are able, to help us continue the work that Zoe has started. Zoe dreams, not of sugar plums, but of a Rescue Facility where she can save so many more of her homeless friends. The children have been watching it finish turning orange in the warm sun.  I will be sending out photos of the children sitting in their pumpkin patch proud as can be of the little pumpkin they helped grow.
After all, Zoe knows that dreams DO come true!Zoe and I wish you and your families the Happiest of Holidays! Ouch!!! My name is Frankie (previously Frenchi) and I am a precious little shih tzu mix that Zoe rescued from the Camarillo Shelter. I am so thankful that they not only saved my life, but they got me the surgery I desperately needed to make me better! Dr.Gregory McDonald, of Westlake Village Animal Hospital operated on me and gave me a new leash on life!


Overheard this week. The children were asking each other where they thought their lunch food came from.   “Where do apples come from?” Trees “Where do grapes come from? Zoe asked if I would let people know that we can really use donations to cover the $1300 out of pocket expenses for my surgery.
Zoe's asks for a $200 donation when they adopt a doggy, regardless of the actual costs each doggy incurs.
Then we'd truly have a government run by the people, for the people!Well, if you make a tax-deductible donation before the end of 2012 to Zoe's Friends Animal Rescue, in effect, you ARE choosing how your tax dollars get spent.
When you donate to a charitable organization, youre allowed to take that donation as a deduction off your income taxes. Its not exactly a dollar-for-dollar exchange, but if you know youre going to owe some income taxes, its a great way to offset that. Personally, Id much rather give money to Zoe's Friends Animal Rescue than to the government!In order for this to affect your 2012 tax return, you HAVE to donate before the end of the year. This week the children learned that Columbus set sail across the ocean with three ships in search of new land.
Our little explorers pretended our clubhouse climber was their boat and used their hands as telescopes to search for distant lands.
They shouted taking turns guiding their “ship” to shore.  At art they painted an ocean in water color. We did counting activities all week as we learned the words to our new counting song, The Five Little pumpkins. We are learning about the ordinal numbers 1st through 5th as we sing.  Ask your child to show you the movements that go along with their song. More than two years later, Zoe, my tireless volunteers and I have placed 247 small loving homeless doggies into happy “furever” homes.Zoe also opened "Zoe's NO FLEAS Market", a fabulous Nonprofit Resale Boutique to benefit Zoe's Rescue and hopefully someday to help us establish a facility to help Many more little homeless doggies!We have made many friends. Thank you to Cole’s family for the yummy watermelon they grew in their garden, and thank you to Trinity’s family for all the delicious tomatoes you brought. A sprinkle of glitter and the web and spider “magically” appeared before their eyes.  We put up a big spider web banner and the children decorated spiders with googly eyes and shapes to stick up on the web. Please consider becoming a foster family if you are able or volunteering in so many other needed capacities at the Rescue as well as Zoe's NO FLEAS Market. We gave them all the ingredients: tortillas, tomatoes, lettuce, organic ground beef, and shredded cheese.
We love you!Wowee!Zoe's Rescue will be hosted by Anthropologie (mine and Zoe's favorite store!!!) in The Oaks Mall this coming Friday, September 21st from 1-5 pm. There will be beautiful doggies for adoption and they are having a donation drive for us too! Please come meet Zoe's Friends and say hello!?? ?THANK YOU!!!? Zoe is so proud of Trey Spellman and his good friends who contacted Zoe and held a lemonade fundraiser to benefit Zoe's Friends Animal Rescue. Music and Movement: Itsy Bitsy Spider, and 5 little pumpkins songHappy Halloween 2013What fun we had this week getting ready for and celebrating Halloween.
They collected over $200 for Zoe's Friends as well as dog food, supplies and warm blankets!
The children have been practicing trick-or-treating all week with the felt pumpkin and cat treat bags we are using for pretend play. Trey began this adventure as a Mitzvah Project and now, we consider Trey and his friends "FAMILY"!
This week the children put on a spider costume and turned into an eight legged arachnid for the spider and fly game.  They took turns being the spider and chased the flies, their friends, to catch them in their web.
There was toilet paper webs all over the house but they had so much fun with the hands on learning.
The children painted their wiggling feet white at Art to make little ghosts and painted everything orange when they made jack-o-lantern masks. Its about using local products, vendors, and incorporating local flavor to support local economies and cater to local tastes. Its about the creation of a whole new category of affordable dining thats converting eaters from yellow-cow quarter pounders to real meat, and the previously unaware to conscientious consumers.
The children loved wearing their costumes and were excited to see what everyone was wearing.



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Comments

  1. karabagli, 10.03.2015
    Frequently come out at the exact same time, specifically signs, and use the celebratory potty.
  2. NiGaR_90, 10.03.2015
    Toilet learning to me is all commence coaching.