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Nate Bagley says he was sick of hearing love stories that fell into one of two categories a€” scandal and divorce, and unrealistic fairytale. So heA started a Kickstarter and used his life savings to tour the country and interview couples in happy, long-term relationships. Self Love: The happiest couples always consisted of two (sometimes more) emotionally healthy and independently happy individuals.
Emotionally healthy people know how to forgive, they are able to acknowledge their part in any disagreement or conflict and take responsibility for it.
Don't Fight To Win: A huge number of couples talked about how they didn't fight against each other.


Seek to Understand: If you're having a hard time playing on the same team, stop fighting and instead try to understand why your partner is upset. They are self-aware enough to be assertive, to pull their weight, and to give love when it's most difficult. The happiest couples knew that if shit got real, their significant other wasn't going to walk out on them. There's a difference between the couple who drives through the rainstorm and the couple who pulls their car to the side of the road to make out in the rain.
They knew that even if things got hard - no, especially if things got hard a€” they were better off together.


They don't worry about the other person trying to undermine them or sabotage them, because they've proven over and over again that they are each other's biggest advocate. If she is complaining that you're spending too much time at work, maybe the real issue is that she misses you, and wants to feel connected with you. Rather than arguing about how you're providing for the family, and she needs to respect how hard you work, try to listen to what she's really saying.



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