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I made my daughter’s date fill one of these out when he picked her up for their first date just over 10 years ago. Having just gone through this with my 17yr olds first crush, I concur with a more the generalized, tamer verison.
My dear friend has been trying to get attribution and links back to her post for every stolen image. These lists can be re-titled as 10 Glaring, Humor-deprived Examples of My Parent’s Boundary Issues. Personally, I’m glad my parents let me make mistakes when I was younger (within reason, of course). People, coming from someone who could have been way worse off, please let your kids make mistakes earlier, when the consequences for failure aren’t as devastating. Even as humor it makes me cringe to see this stuff because I hear parents say these things in all seriousness. But what bothers me are people who will in one breath be fine with one list but then cry sexist foul at the other.
I don’t find this list particularly funny, but I don’t find it as damaging as most people either. I understand the need for some people to speak out and make sure that these overprotective stereotypes aren’t getting out of hand – and I agree with everything Aaron said in his piece – but I think this is harmless.
I can’t figure out if this is white trash, wealthy entitlement, or liquor-soaked suburban posery (I just made that word up). Threats will only limit the number of grandchildren one has, how many pleasant family gatherings one will have to forfeit, how few healthy relationships one’s child will have. I would have no issue with my wee man one day bringing home a questionably dressed young lady or gentleman, as long as that kid was willing to openly talk with me. These rules are a bit hyperbolic but there are kernels of truth in them (just like the ones about daughters). So you’re teaching your kids to base their self-worth against how much skin they show compared to others?
And since when did the length of someone’s skirt indicate their level of self-respect? 6 Reasons Some Divorced Dads Check Out Of Their Children’s LivesLet’s take a look at some of the main reasons fathers abandon children after divorce. Use the form below to delete this Our New Rules For Dating My Daughter Shirt Or Old image from our index.
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SoSoActive is an interactive media company that offers entertainment, culture, fitness, family and political opinions for the millennial generation. You can view the entire handbook including some really fantastic modesty guidelines for women students here (PDF). Listen, we have a great couple in our church from that college that are interracial, and I haven’t heard them complain about stuff from there.
We need to make sure the Anglos stick with the anglos, the Saxons with the saxons, the nordics by themselves. My mother (of Danish ancestry) says her parents did not approve of her marriage to a Latin dude, until the first baby was born, blonde and blue-eyed. I’m sure my parents would give me permission to date someone of another race, if I asked them, but since I’m over 21, and so would be anyone I dated, what business is it of theirs?
The sad part: as a private institution, they have every right to enforce almost anything they want. The fact is that most students entering a Christian college have been under very strict control all of their life – to have them attend college in a distance with no rules will cause a shipwreck of an immature life.
The *real* solution is for parents to relax their strictness to verify how mature their child is and not send him (her) off to college.
However, so many parents expect the colleges to also keep a tight rein on their children that the college has adopted such strict rules.
Many teens are not mature, and have a hard time controlling themselves… it does take some time to learn to govern or control our passions.

So, the college probably has the best of motives in trying to minimize the chances of immorality. It is up to the adult students to tell their parents about their relationships when they determine it is appropriate, not up to the school to stick its nose into the situation. Did anyone think it was creepy that Hyles, an older married man, visited yhe DORMS of young college girls?
I just found some pictures from when I was in college and some of them are him dressed up like an ice cream vendor (white suit with a bell and an ice cream cart) going through the dorms handing out ice cream to the girls. I’ve read a lot of stuff about how the girls went goo goo eyed at him, and I can’t help but wonder WHY? Once I brought home from our church library a boatload of cassette tapes from him and even just listening to him on tape, all he did was snivel every few seconds as he preached. When I returned as an employee, he got angry one night at a girls’ meeting that women employees were not there.
You know, I didn’t go to a fundy college by any means, but I did go to a significantly more lenient Southern Baptist college and the atmosphere was similar.
That’s one of the reasons I never dated while at Fundy U…it was too much trouble! All I can say is that people who are stupid enough to agree to these rules deserve to be held to them. One reads this bullshit and thinks “Is this really too much different than Sharia law”? Modernists, traditionalists and fundamentalists all hold different views of sharia, as do adherents to different schools of Islamic thought and scholarship. Oh and my younger sister enrolled in this college this fall for the single purpose of meeting a man.
Wouldn’t meeting a man work out better in a place where you could, you know, talk to guys and stuff? I suppose the odds are slightly better than the compound she lived in and the 10 member church she went to. One thing to keep in mind is that it *is* the south and parents FLIP over stupid things like that. Wow talk about a FIRESTORM!!!I All rules begin for a reason some because the people who made them are crazy and others because they were trying to protect the purity of the students. To be consistent if you are going to ask permission of both parents then every dating coupe on campus should have the same requirements. Looking back 30+ years ago to my first rip to Fundy U,there were a lot of kids who needed the rules. My second trip to a different Fundy U, I was married and lived off campus so the rules didn’t apply. My thought has always been in any ministry I had a part in, that most of the kids in my classes needed a good example, and that seeing me hold my wife’s hand, treat her respectfully, and show that I truly liked her was better than having them wonder if any church leaders had good relationships or just talked about them. Another thing that jumped out at me: According to the rules, if you somehow make a friend who has a house off campus and you are invited to bring your plus-one to a party at that house, you must also bring along a chaperone who has been approved by the college. Can you imagine trying to explain who that third person is and why they are in your friend’s living room?
Aside from the interracial dating rule (which is hands down the most outrageous and offensive thing in this list), these people are practically begging for their students to be both emotionally and sexually dysfunctional.
A lot of the dress code stuff reminded me of my all-girls Catholic high school… but it seemed less vile when applied to minors instead of GROWN UPS. Seems like it would be kind of a mood-killer to have to get on your knees and pray for forgiveness after making out. Well on the plus side, I think the prohibition against dating 14 year olds is pretty good rule.
We would like to thank John Bourgeois for sending us the image of this custom T-shirt that he wanted.
My son is an autonomous human being, and I hold no illusions that I can in any way micromanage his decisions or his behavior. All you are demonstrating for them is that true love is demonstrated when another person tries to control and manipulate you.
That said, from what I witness, the friends who were kept on the tightest leashes are paying for it now. As a result our daughters tended to date more well mannered guys and the not so great ones sort of faded away. And that instead of being kind and nonjudgemental and respecting everyone, they should make judgements on the human value of others based on a very objective criteria?
Also, just because someone might have a low self esteem, that doesn’t give you the right to treat them as less of a human being. But Not For Long: Three Delayed Albums We are Dying to HearKelland DrumgooleCEO, Writer, Rapper, Internet Marketer, Innovator and author of The Social Music Revolution Revealed. It is odd, but really it’s none of our business how a private institution is run unless we go there. Interracial marriage still has a stigma in a few circles because the couples have in the past been in rebellion to their parents. Interracial marriage still has a stigma in some circles because some people are still bigots. I always used to say I wouldn’t have made it 5 minutes in one of these fundy colleges. We’ve adopted one biracial boy and one african american boy from foster care, and, I have to tell you, white babies are flat ugly to us now. No one seemed bothered by this, but I’m 25 and I still catch hell for having a 40-year-old fiancee. By holding interracial couples to a different standard and adding a potential roadblock, Crown College has revealed its overt racism. I was only at that place twice in my life, once was on a Wednesday when he preached in chapel. What you may not realize is that there are likely MANY more rules that aren’t listed here which could randomly be applied as the staff member feels necessary.

Nobody here is going to be beaten for meeting someone of the opposite sex without a chaperone. And me coming out smiling from a closed conference in the Dean of Men’s office must have been a sight few people had seen. I went to a Bible College in the late 80’s and it was fairly strict but nothing like this. Females may attend classes or church as long as they wear burqas and keep their eyes cast down at all times. Males may attend classes or church as long as they avoid looking at females (those bulky-looking things covered head to toe in cloth). Males and females both may do other activities as determined by staff, but they may not ask permission to do these activities. As bizarre as that sounds, it is far less weird than calling them my chaperone or a party crasher that follows me around. Same with silly rules barring married couples from public displays of affection: wouldn’t it benefit kids to see loving married couples? If a young woman can’t even date your son without being threatened, what is life going to be like when she marries him? I can only hope that through demonstrating respect for him, and myself… that he will understand how to be respectful of himself and others.
Again, it’s not the funniest thing in the world, but I got it for what it was – classic misdirection humor. It just taught me to be timid, and to be wary of even trying to enjoy my own body or be comfortable.
All people in all states of dress and sexual relationships deserve to be treated with basic human decency. Just because you may want to be a decent human being doesn’t mean than everyone wants to! We watched a five-month-old for a friend recently, and I kept telling my wife how off his skin tone was and how ugly he was. It was mainly my stepmom who allowed it (funny how often the wife is the one who REALLY runs a fundy family, isn’t it?), and her reasoning was that the guy was a nice Christian boy, and of course would never do anything unseemly. I guess if you’re there all the time you can sort of tune that out but I kept thinking will someone give him a handkerchief so he can blow his nose? There were others of us whose parents had given them a bit of rope and hadn’t yet hung themselves (ourselves?), so the rules were a bit constricting. But how in the holy heck would they know whether or not any other body part was pierced unless they were looking, and what right do they have to examine my body in search of tats or piercings?
If they are married, they may touch their wives once a month if they bathe well afterwards. I can also hope that the many open and honest communications we have had have prepared him for the depth of emotional intimacy that comes with adult relationships. The entire list is designed to set up the author as an overprotective parent and then zing you with the last line about becoming your mother-in-law, which presumes that she has allowed you past all her insecurities about her son dating you and into the family.
It is important to give children a sense of respect for self and respect for others, assuredly, and there’s nothing wrong with having your own family’s way with dress code and the like, but goodness! Teaching your kids that they are lesser because of that (as opposed to other behaviors like being bullies, physically and emotionally abusing others, ect.) is very detrimental. I kept waiting for him to break it up and say applaud for Jesus not for me, something like that but he didn’t. No co-ed with a skirt that’s too short will have their legs whipped and spray painted red.
I got to his office, he had me come in, and a couple of others came in and the door was closed. Maybe I should have tried following more of them, but since I’m in the 29th year of actually enjoying, not enduring my marriage to the girl I met there, it worked for me.
Their parents controlled their bank accounts, so now they have poor ability to keep money aside to fall back on. But every bit of comedy, whether smart or ignorant, reveals a lot about the psychology of the comedian. During his transformation, when we would make out he would make us pray quickly afterwards. And what could be a better demonstration of your love for them than to say “Hey, I trust you to make a mature decision. My son is only 2 years old right now, but I hope that I will be the best mother in law I can be, while still (appropriately) looking out for my son’s interests. The change to the clothing is to keep your clothes on your body and purchase the appropriate size for that body. I assured them I would let them know when the truck was back in my possession, and left with no demerits.
In saying that, his decisions will be his adult decisions to make at the end of the day and that is how I will raise him. Boy do I look forward to the posts today especially from those of you who lived through this! When we buy into the stereotypical mentality, we’re really saying we think our sons are dumb and that women (our own womenfolk) are all manipulative, dishonourable people. God’s instruction is for your BEST not to harm you for HE knows the plans He has for you.
When we broke up, he was so deep into crazy that he truly believed Satan brought us together. For the past month or more, I prayed it would end for various other red flags I was seeing. Thank you God, for removing her from my sons life and I pray the lessons learned would not be forgotten.

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