The word ‘harem’ often conjures up sexual visions where multiple female dancers hand feed a lone aging fat man grapes while twitching their finely tuned abdominal muscles and showering him with kisses. I drove up to Sonoma for the weekend to join ten other women at a house tucked away in Sonoma’s wine country. We all laughed and continued to share our stories, not to compete with one another but rather to find common ground.

In moments like these we realize we are not alone; we can rely on each other to help us navigate the ‘trickier’ parts of life. I drove back from the weekend with a slight hangover (this group of women wasn’t good at restraint), a borrowed mink stole (“you must wear it to the wedding”), a few decisions, and a tingle of appreciation. I toasted our bachelorette of honor, took a sip, and divulged my thoughts without any fear of judgment.

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