Ann Blumenthal Jacobs, Patricia Lampl and Tish Rabe are the authors of Love for Grown-ups: The Garter Brides’ Guide to Marrying for Life When You’ve Already Got a Life, a relationship guide for women over 35 on how to find Mr.
The Garter Brides -- Ann Blumenthal Jacobs, Patricia Ryan Lampl, and Tish Rabe -- have interviewed countless women for our book, LOVE FOR GROWN-UPS: The Garter Brides' Guide to Marrying For Life When You've Already Got a Life, and have asked our thousands of Facebook fans to share their experiences and advice for a successful online 'first' date. Remember, everyone you meet is looking for the same thing you are – someone to have a fulfilling, fun and romantic relationship with! One woman said she always texts a friend and leaves the phone number of where she'll be on the kitchen counter. Some Garter Brides have shared with us that they are more comfortable doing something active on the first meeting. Even if you have to pretend to have another appointment or need to be home at a certain hour – do that.


You may be furious with your ex, and as much as we know it's important to vent all this stuff, don't do it on a first date. We feel that that's a little risky time wise because if it's not working, you might feel trapped. He has a history too and he's probably got some unhappy stories as well, but playing therapist or sounding board to one another is not a good start. Put the phone on vibrate so you can check it, but whatever you do, don't answer it unless it's an emergency. The Garter Brides are fans of giving everyone a second date chance (no one has first date jitters on the second date!), but, if you know it will go nowhere, be a grown-up.
If there's chemistry there, you can spend more time on the second date getting to know each other.


Go to an exhibit, hear some jazz, hit some golf balls – you'll both feel less nervous and will have more to talk about.
Yes, that's hard to do, but you'd want to know if he felt that way and not continue to have expectations that won't be met.



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