Coaching is becoming more and more popular with shows like The Voice, Reality TV shows and with sports performances. Note: if a casual rapport-building question triggers an emotionally charged response, just acknowledge that and go back to safer waters, with the option of returning to the matter later. Saying "He should have done it better," is not a feeling, but a thought (in this case not even about oneself).
Actually, the best way to influence another is by taking charge of your own feelings and behavior, instead of futilely trying to control another person. Before going into something more private, even if the coaching session is about this issue, ask the person if it's okay to talk about the area in question. Note: allow for the unexpected -- things to come out of the blue for your dream to materialize. It's good to help yourself or the person you are coaching to allow time for new activities. It's generally better to set small achievable goals and succeed than bigger ones and fail, and maybe quit in frustration. When problems arise, it's understandable to become seemingly clueless about what's going on.
If you ask, "What are you feeling now?" and the person draws a blank, acknowledge her or him. You just engaged the person's higher faculties and imagination to open up unconscious thoughts and feelings to be examined.
Just telling stuff about your life, without a specific reason to do so, is not necessarily therapeutic.

But sharing a personal example, at the right time, can help the person you are coaching gain insight and see more possibilities.
Instead of supporting the person with your disclosure, you would be undermining the confidence the person you are coaching has in you. Rather than helping them get out of the mud, you could be wallowing in your own mud alongside the person you are trying to help.
To go further: Get your Complimentary Coaching & Healing Success Kit to access your coaching quiz, fascinating coaching facts, The Wheel of Aliveness and more. Making sure all your players understand the need to move forward together and at the same speed will cut down the opposition's try scoring opportunities dramatically. In Holding the line rugby drill, I showed you how the defence must work together as a straight line. Whatever your goal -- to perform better, improve your health or relationships or spiritually advance -- coaching can make a big difference. The idea is create comfort and ease in relating, which builds trust to talk about deeper matters. So the answer to the question about "how am I feeling" should include words like sad, happy, frustrated, excited, etc.
A chance encounter, an unexpected resource, or a different opportunity than you envisioned could be the golden ticket. If you forget to meditate, or whatever the next step is, then just recommit and start again. It's quite another thing to intentionally share an experience that relates to what the person you are coaching is going through.

If you still are upset and unresolved about the financial loss, for example, don't share that experience. It lets you know the next steps to take, for both you and the person receiving the coaching. The common fallacy is if only the other person's behavior changed, then I would feel all right. The idea is to fit your current life into the big picture of where your dream is taking you. Too much talking, and not enough asking questions and listening, can get in the way and be counterproductive. Any player moving at a different speed to the rest of the line will create gaps that the attacking team can easily exploit.
The picture below shows clearly what happens when a player moves up faster or slower then the rest of the line.Key rugby coaching tips for alignmentPlayers moving up too quickly are usually over eager to get to their opposite man and make the tackle. Players dropping behind the line are usually tired, unfit or just the slower members of the team. If they are in midfield, then the rest of the line must move up at their speed, however slow it is.
Rugby Coach Weekly is a unique coaching resource for new rugby coaches and coaches of inexperienced players and children.Click here for rugby coaching tips to get players working on a spread defence.

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