I have never been one of those girls who needed a boyfriend.   From a young age I was proud to live and travel independently and take care of myself (and later I was 100% financially responsible for my daughter and proud of that too) and I’m actually really, really happy alone.
To sum me up in the simplest terms, I’m a single, empty-nested woman, which to me is great.
Assuming all that is true, why are these bloody romance packages getting under my skin so much?
Of course on some level I’m jealous of what I see in these snoodled up, loved up, happy couples.
I don’t know if there is a perfect answer to my scrambled up, mixed-up bag of feelings and issues I’m airing out today.
MenuFearless doesnt mean you're completely unafriad and it doesnt mean you're bulletproof, it means you have alot of fears.. If this image belongs to you or is your intellectual property, please submit a copyright notification instead of reporting it.
We encourage users to report abusive images and help us moderate the content on We Heart It. DISCLAMER: We do not claim credit for any images used for the site, these remain the property of their original owners and credit for these will be given where possible. Longing for that Indian in Bangalore played the biggest part in the first year of my quiet – good girl – celibacy but the 2nd year until now really is more a factor of my life and being overwhelmed by circumstance than anything else.

Well, that is probably less true now that my daughter has gone off to uni in the UK because she was truly the best part of my life and obviously that day-to-day fix is now gone.
I’ve been single without a proper boyfriend since 2005, and I kind of can’t remember what it was even like anymore. But I’m reviewing romance and honeymoon packages in Seminyak and Ubud for two months and it’s starting to mess with my head.
By night I love to travel where they don’t speak English and to blog about everything under the sun. But please keep in mind that reporting images that are not abusive is against our terms of service and can get your account blocked.
I’m now in Bali for 2 months reviewing 5-star hotels and boutique villas – and well into year 3 alone – and wondering when is ‘enough’ enough?
My last ‘sorta’ relationship was with that Indian but he would never introduce me to his parents so it wasn’t really a ‘real’ relationship in the traditional sense even though it came with all the same emotional weight of one, and that ended in August 2013. Don’t get me wrong, it’s amazing … but a single girl can only take so much simulated romance before she wants a real man to share it with … and not just my laptop ‘Eduardo’. Yet something about these romantic dinners and lunches and couples massages and extra special moments that I need to experience – ON MY OWN – in order to write about them is sort of screwing with me. She always told me ‘ Angie, when it’s supposed to happen, it’s going to happen’ and I loved that concept of love and destiny.

It feels good to throw my questions out onto the wind today though, which presently is at the W Retreat & Spa Bali in Seminyak on the beach…oddly enough situated on the Indian Ocean as if to add a poetic twist to me pondering romance and men again. I’m a single engine airplane pilot, a current contributor to Conde Nast Traveller Magazine, a native of southern California and I’ve lived in Mexico, Spain for 12 years, India for 3, China, Hong Kong, recently for 2 months in Bali, and I now happily reside in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. I mean, all the other couples I run into while holding Eduardo in my arms look so loved up.
That concept meant I never had to do any online dating like so many people do or go put myself out there in an inconvenient way because MY man – you know a hot Australian rancher who looks just like Hugh Jackman from the Baz Luhrman film Australia with Nicole Kidman – well, he is out there somewhere and eventually I will meet him, move to the Australian outback, and live happily ever after.
This may sound selfish but I don’t ever have to worry about anyone else’s feelings or schedule or have to check with anyone about jack diddly squat…because it’s just me. And the things I am trying out would be so much better with someone… so maybe I’ve been wrong about thinking that I’m really great single all these years?
Honestly, I’d rather stay single and keep living an amazing life of my choosing than to try and go find a man just for the sake of having a man.  I really just want to unexpectedly happen one day to meet the man I’m supposed to grow old with.

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