It is appalling to hear news about discrimination but more so if it had something to do with love as I believe that Love knows no boundaries and is the only thing that’s constant in this world.
It’s going to be more difficult for people to answer the question, how can I find true love? Many dating expats probably experienced some form of discrimination or challenges while dating and the important thing here is to remain strong and to stand your ground. I guess the good news here is that majority of the world agrees and is open to interracial dating.
A small Kentucky church has chosen to ban marriages and even some worship services for interracial couples.
The small congregation, which usually hosts about 40 members each Sunday, held the vote after longtime member Stella Harville, brought her fiance Ticha Chikuni to church with her in June. Chikuni, 29, who works at Georgetown College, is black–and Harville, who was baptized at the church but is not an active member, is white. The Harville family has formally requested the congregation to reconsider the interracial ban, and Thompson has also said he would like to resolve the issue, the area CBS affiliate WYMT has reported. Members of the church held a vote on Thompson’s proposed language, with nine voting in favor and six voting against. Gawker notes that Pike County is 98 percent white and home to the infamous Hatfield-McCoy feud. And Stella’s father was much more forceful in his denunciation of the interracial ban. Lorii Abela is a multi-awarded international leader and motivational speaker, matchmaker, and an acknowledged expert on soul mates. This entry was posted in General and tagged dating expats, how can i find true love, how to find the girl for you, how to find the guy for you.
Throughout the grand scheme of things you actually secure an A+ just for effort and hard work.
Lorrie, yes, it would be a wonderful world if we would just look in awe of how beautiful other human beings are as how babies do.
Interesting article, When you reflect on history and the role that church or religion plays in the life of people its not shocking. When I was growing up in the 60s, even in progressive Queens, NY, interracial relationships were spoken about in shameful whispers. I can’t believe such backward people and ideas exist in this world but am well aware that they do. Lorii, I am shocked that this kind of practice still exists…true love does not discriminate based on color and people shouldn’t either!
Lorii being in an interracial relationship myself, I am fully aware of the biases and the discrimination that still occurs in this day and age. After taking a look at the book, I asked Arielle if I could share the first chapter with you, and she agreed. Publisher Description: Is it your dream to find a life-partner who will love, cherish and adore you? The universal Law of Attraction states that we draw to us those people, events, and circumstances that match our inner state of being.
If you do not yet believe with 100 percent certainty that your soulmate is out there, you must begin to look for evidence that will make a believer out of you. The point is, it is not necessary for you to know how or where or when your soulmate will appear.
Still, deep down I was sad I had gone my entire adult life longing to know what it would be like living in a partnership without emotional walls or eggshells to walk on. But three days before our nineteenth anniversary, I discovered the source of my husband’s joy—he was having an affair with a woman in another state with two young children who “needed” him and made him feel alive. Despite the fact that I was starting to very much enjoy the quiet of being alone, I could feel that “he,” my soulmate, was close by and would be a welcome complement to the happiness I was already feeling.
The next day, my dear friend Arielle Ford and her husband, Brian (both had been on “Team Linda” after my separation, sending me uplifting music and calling regularly with their cheerleading), sent me the Soulmate Kit, with details about how to make the most powerful Treasure Map for attracting one’s soulmate. Years ago I had made several such maps, one for a home I’d hoped to manifest (which happened, with remarkable likeness) and one for my writing career (also with striking results). I painted a red canvas and spent hours going through magazines and searching through my previous cutouts for the perfect ones. Then I found something strange while going through the box: a large cutout of a name—CHRIS—in white writing on a blue background.
The fact that I had cut out Chris’s name several years before nagged at me for a few hours. I worked on my soulmate Treasure Map in my kitchen for several days, perfecting it until it felt totally “cooked.” One Tuesday afternoon, I carried it upstairs to my bedroom, nailed a nail into the wall, and hung my creation across from my bed. That same evening, Chris called and said he had a headache from a very stressful day at work and was just going to get in the car and go for a ride.
Chris came over, I fed him leftovers, and we hit it off so thoroughly that evening that we’ve been practically inseparable ever since. Time will tell if Chris and I will indeed get married and end up together for the rest of our lives. Like the images and words outlined on my map, Chris looks at me in a way that makes me feel loved, adored, admired, and deeply desired. Following the devastating breakup of her marriage, Linda could have allowed her life to be governed by her old belief that “? nding real love is not in the cards for me.” Instead, she chose to believe that “bad” things happen for good reasons—usually to clear out space for the good that is on its way.
Now, take a deep breath and ask yourself, “Am I willing to release these old beliefs?” Notice what your answer is, and if you are really ready to let them go, imagine gathering all the old, painful feelings and beliefs and limitations and mentally projecting them onto all your old lovers, who are still standing before you.
Take a moment and relish the feeling of spraying that paint, congealing every one of those negative memories, experiences, and beliefs together into a single bubble. What would you have to believe about yourself in order to magnetize your soulmate into your life? Believe and know deep in your heart that The One is out there for you, that you deserve to have your desires ful?lled, and that you deserve to give and receive love.
Take this time to think about all the qualities you have to offer, and in case you are forgetting what those are, I’d like to remind you: it’s the love you give and share, the kindness and warmth you exude—not to mention all your other talents. Believing that your soulmate exists, that you are deserving of him or her, and that the Universe is skillfully orchestrating your meeting is the basis for applying the next part of the formula—to generate a vision of yourself and your life where these beliefs are your daily reality. Treasure mapping is a powerful tool for manifestation, because it helps you to both intuitively and objectively clarify what your heart is yearning to experience.
I have heard about so many incredible connections unfolding as a result of people using the Treasure Mapping process. It was during this time that I began working with a teacher who assured me I could have whatever I wanted in life if I learned to use the power of my mind. I put together a dream board that would serve as a visual reminder of what I wanted to manifest in my life—and of course I was looking to manifest the woman who would one day be my wife. As a result of creating my dream board, I became very clear about what the nonnegotiable characteristics and behaviors of my next partner would be. Once you’ve created your Treasure Map, I would suggest you keep it in a place where you can look at it daily but slide it under the bed or in a closet when company shows up.
Remember, what you believe to be true about yourself in the innermost recesses of your heart and mind is what gets mirrored back to you through your external circumstances. I learned and invented techniques, rituals, visualizations and prayers that helped me prepare my body, mind, spirit and home for an amazing relationship. The basic Law of Attraction states that you will attract to you those things that match your state of belief. You may not realize it but resenting someone or being unwilling to forgive them actually binds you to them. 7) Clear out the clutter in your home and create space for your beloved (especially in your closets).
Eliminating physical clutter from your life is one of the fastest ways to increase the inflow of new positive energy.
It’s important to be on the lookout for synchronistic signs from the Universe or inspiring invitations that come out of the blue, that may lead you to your soulmate.  Taking action may also mean joining an online dating service, enrolling in a scuba diving course or simply sharing with trusted friends your desire to meet the love of your life.
Find ways each day to nourish your self with love, appreciation, healthy food, positive thoughts and tenderness.
Arielle Ford is a leading personality in the personal growth and contemporary spirituality movement.
Enter your email address and we'll send you our weekly magazine by email with fresh, exciting and thoughtful content that will enrich your inbox and your life, week after week. So when I hear that a small Kentucky church banned the union of interracial couples,  as reported by Eric Pfeiffer in the column below, it broke my heart. How to find the girl for you or how to find the guy for you should not be decided by your church or any authority. Like Stella Harville and Ticha Chikuni, her African boyfriend, you must remain standing and make sure that love prevails.
The Gulnare Freewill Baptist Church, located in Pike County, made the vote in response to a longtime member who is engaged to a man whose birthplace is in Zimbabwe. Parties of such marriages will not be received as members, nor will they be used in worship services and other church functions, with the exception being funerals.
Co-author of four international bestselling books—including Sexy Secrets to a Juicy Love Life Vol. I truly enjoyed reading it, you will be a great author.I will ensure that I bookmark your blog and may come back later in life. I don’t understand a church stating they intended to promote greater unity among the church body and the community we serve when they are not uniting people together. If there is one thing I would want you and others to know is that not all Christians hold the beliefs that this church holds. I run niche dating sites because of this problem where single know that they want to date people of all races. I hope that the publicity that this incident will provoke shines a light on the hearts of those involved and they see clearly that we are all one people.
Arielle recently sent me a copy of her book, The Soulmate Secret: Manifest the Love of Your Life With the Law of Attraction. Below is a description of the book written by the publisher and a link to read the first chapter. With the The Soulmate Secret: Manifest the Love of Your Life With the Law of Attraction by Arielle Ford you will learn how to take control of your romantic destiny with prayers, rituals, and proven manifestation tools that will prepare your body, mind, spirit and home for the soulmate your heart truly desires.


We had been friends for ? fteen years before we began dating, and we ?t together like hand and glove. After a few (or many) bad relationships, it’s so easy to shut down, give up, and stop believing that the right person is out there for us. When deep down in the core of your being you believe that your soulmate exists, there is no limit to the ways he or she can enter your life. Your only work right now is to begin to nurture the belief that he or she exists and that you will ?nd each other when the time is right. There is plenty of evidence that love is available to everyone regardless of age, weight, income, or any of the other factors that we believe limit us. Was it the beautiful weather or the passing of time that was mellowing my blustery alpha male? I had longed to stand before my beloved, our pure, open hearts holding space for one another. He called me his best friend, and we laughed a lot, had many things in common, and adored our son, which made our lack of passion easier to get my head around.
Their bond was all he needed to walk away from me, from us, and soon move twelve hundred miles away. I knew he would ful?ll needs within me that were never met in my marriage (as, I’m sure, my ex-husband’s girlfriend ful?lled for him). But beneath the casualness and sometimes seeming ridiculous futility of it all (after all, I was out there dating—hello?!), I was looking for my partner with full intention. I couldn’t wait to get started, to further clarify the image of what having him in my life would look like. In fact, I went a little nuts back then with the scissors and had cut out so many extra words and images that I’d put hundreds of them in a box ready for another time. I said a little prayer that it would bring my ideal man into my world, touching each image on the map and then letting it go, trying to trust in my map’s inherent magic.
And in giving him that same love and admiration, I am feeling whole and in partnership in a way I’ve never known. I designed the following feelingization to support you in releasing old, limiting beliefs about yourself, others, and the world, that may be preventing you from attracting the love you desire. And if you don’t quite believe it today, see if you can, in this moment, believe that The One is on the way and that your knowingness is growing daily. Try not to think too hard about the words and images you’re selecting, but rather trust your gut feeling about what you ?nd attractive. You want your Treasure Map to af?rm that you are loved, cherished, and adored by your perfect partner. On the surface it seems unbelievable or miraculous, but I now understand that Treasure Mapping just helps to reveal attributes that are important to you in a partner, which you may not be consciously aware of. All our friends thought we were perfect together, but in truth our relationship felt lonely and painful.
This teacher suggested that if I wanted to have a great relationship, I would have to change some of my core beliefs about how the Universe works.
While ?ipping through a magazine, I was struck by a picture of a brunette relaxing in a tropical setting, her head tilted back, and aqua blue water ?owing over her head.
But I still wasn’t clear about what I needed to embrace inside of me for my soulmate to appear.
I consciously and deliberately renewed my faith in every way I could: I focused on my strengths, and to the best of my ability, I lived from a place of certainty, trusting and following the impulses I received from within. I say she became visible because we had actually met several years earlier—at the Shared Vision luncheon my teacher took me to!
You don’t need anyone else’s opinions or energy projected onto your dreams and commitments. I woke up one day, at age 43, and decided to manifest my soulmate using everything I had ever learned about psychology, spirituality, and the Law of Attraction.  My intentions became crystal clear while I simultaneously cleared out the clutter in my house AND in my heart.
Six months after I began the adventure I met my husband, Brian, who has exceeded all of my desires and expectations. There were days when the thought that he was very late did cross my mind but I would just let those thoughts go and get back into a state of grace….feeling and knowing that his arrival was assured. Believing that your soul mate is out there is critical to the preparation of manifestation. Big love is possible for any one of any age if you are willing to become a magnet for love.  Continue to live each day in the knowingness that you already are in a loving, committed relationship as you savor the waiting for your beloved to arrive. Then take your list and create a “vision map,” a collage that becomes a visual representation of your romantic future.
You may also want to hang your “vision map” above your altar.  Find time each day to spend a few minutes sitting in front of your altar saying a prayer of gratitude for your beloved’s swift arrival.
For the past 25 years she has been living, teaching, and promoting consciousness through all forms of media. In this day and age where dating expats has been a common and “normal” thing to do, how can this happen now? My take on this is that religion must be more flexible and adjust its rules according to the times. What happened to this couple can be a step back for those like me whose advocacy is to help expats find true love but I believe that love will conquer even the most difficult odds. However, Thompson recently stepped down and the church’s new pastor, Stacy Stepp, said the couple was once again welcome to sing. The important thing is to surround yourself with like-minded people who see the soul rather than the physical shell.
I’m not a big fan of The Law of Attraction, but I did take a look at her book with an open mind, and I have to say, it’s a good book! If you’re looking to manifest the man or woman of your dreams, I recommend you check it out.
He was an ambitious Hollywood producer, we were well matched in every way, and we had even started house shopping and discussing marriage. Our hearts yearn to fall in love, but our minds insist it’s not possible, and we enter into a tug-ofwar with ourselves. If we believe that there is plenty of love in the world and we are worthy of giving and receiving that love, we will attract a different quality of relationships than someone who believes in scarcity or feels unworthy of happiness.
Take for example my friend Trudy, who, while searching for the perfect cantaloupe, met her husband in the produce aisle of a Whole Foods market. You also need to begin to dismantle some of the negative beliefs about yourself that you may have unknowingly collected over the years.
Regardless of our personal histories in relationships, we can choose to adopt the belief that everything we’ve been through has been but preparation for ? nding our true love. But I had concluded that this vulnerable kind of love just wasn’t in the cards for me, reasoning that this is what you get when you marry a stranger, as I had, after only eight weeks of dating. Our views on parenting were vastly different and a source of great pain for us both, but our son was almost off to college, and we’d ? nally have the time and money to travel and get to know each other outside of the stress of parenting. He had done me a favor because there was big love for me out there—the kind I had always hoped could happen for me.
I would imagine him standing behind me, holding me in his arms and kissing the back of my neck.
My divorce is weeks away from being ?nal, and he and I talk frequently about sharing our lives together. Now when I’m working in the kitchen or brushing my teeth, he often walks up behind me, wraps me in his arms, and kisses the back of my neck.
Take a moment to ask yourself what you must have believed about yourself to tolerate this kind of behavior. In a moment, you’re going to press the trigger and spray the can, and as you do, all those people and all those painful memories are going to become globbed together inside a big latex bubble. You don’t exactly know where air or water come from, but you totally believe they are there for you. I have been making Treasure Maps for years, and it’s uncanny how many of the images and ideas that I mapped have manifested in my actual life. Make sure to include at least one photo or image of a loving couple—it could be as simple as two people walking on the beach hand in hand. Looking at your map daily reminds you of your deeper values and also helps you to begin noticing them where you may have missed them before. Rather than supporting one another’s growth, we seemed to feed off each other’s weaknesses, and we experienced major dramas almost daily.
She told me that whatever I was picturing on the inside of my mind was going to show up on the outside, because of something called the Law of Attraction. One day while I was meditating on my dream board, I heard a small, quiet voice inside of me say, “Live with certainty.” At ? rst I didn’t know what that meant, but then I started to understand.
Over the years we had become friends, but my eyes were so clouded with doubt and uncertainty that I could not see who she really was. Because while you may have justi? ed the belief that you are only talented enough to attract a certain amount of money or only organized enough to accomplish a certain number of daily tasks, there is virtually no limit or worldly barometer that can measure your inner worth. If you learn to believe that the ONE is not only out there but is ALSO LOOKING FOR YOU, then true love can be yours. But, if we believe the world is a chaotic, stressful and fearful place, then that becomes our reality.  .
Then read all the letters out loud to your self with the intention of allowing any remaining animosity to dissipate.
You deserve your own love and affection.  When you fall in love with yourself the whole world mirrors that love back to you. She is a love and relationship expert, and the author of 10 books including her newest, Turn Your Mate Into Your Soulmate (Harper One). One must always stay open to possibilities and refrain from judging people by the color of their skin as it does not reflect a person’s worth.
This recommendation is not intended to judge the salvation of anyone, but is intended to promote greater unity among the church body and the community we serve. If you have been wondering how you can turn your light on, wow, and enchant your soulmate into entering your life, Lorii has answers! If we believe the world is a loving and friendly place, then most of the time that will be our experience. Or Patricia, a former colleague, whose best friend practically had to drag her out of bed to go to a party, where she ended up meeting her future husband by the coat check.


My friend Linda Sivertsen, after grieving the end of her nineteen-year marriage at the age of forty-three, is living proof that believing the love you desire exists is the ? rst essential step to drawing it into your life. He no longer yelled or called me names or threatened to leave at the smallest disagreement—well, not that often anyway. Although I had doubts about our potential, maybe with his sudden peacefulness, new levels of closeness and intimacy were possible? As he ran toward his bright, shiny future, I was left in the fetal position, grieving the loss of my family (and possibly my home) and trying to deliver on the biggest work deadlines of my life while getting almost no sleep for months on end. I knew that time would only exaggerate the pain if I didn’t get all the dark, lumpy, crappy bits from my heart and mind up and out. I could feel it, and I started thanking God for the woman who had taken my ex’s affections so I could be free.
The only thing was, I had never made her one, had never planned to make her one, and doubted I ever would. When he saw my Treasure Map for the ?rst time, he seemed sort of mesmerized by it, scanning the images.
Once, after Brian and I had just found out we would need to move within nine months, I made a Treasure Map that included a picture of a bedroom with an ocean view we found particularly appealing. When selecting these images, you are looking to evoke a feeling as opposed to manifesting the models in the photos, so look for images that convey the feeling you desire more than a particular face. I knew I deserved to have a great relationship—one that nurtured my soul and enlivened my spirit—but for the moment I was feeling stuck and depressed. My assignment was to get clear about the exact kind of relationship I wanted and then have faith that it would actually show up for me.
I like to set up my Treasure Map as an altar with candles, fresh ? owers, and spiritual icons nearby to bless it. You are inherently lovable, and the moment you start believing that with all your heart and mind, you will begin to see evidence of it all around you. Buy it now and receive many amazing bonuses, including a free 5-part video series featuring Iyanla Van Zant, Dr.
They are the future of true love and interracial relationships that can encounter difficulties or challenges in making it work. Your writing is definitely extremely powerful and that is possibly why I am taking the effort to comment. When you have a true living relationship with Christ, you don’t see His word filled with rules, instead you see view His Word as His love letter to you, giving you guidelines so that you can truly live your best life yet.
However, at the local high schools you will find many mixed race couple expressing their feelings with little to no repercussions from their classmates. It walks you through a very methodic, clear, and easy-to-follow set of exercises that help you open up mentally, emotionally, and spiritually to finding a life partner. I deserve a great relationship!” while another part insists, “I’ll never ? nd him or her.” When our beliefs contradict our desires, we experience an inner con?ict that not only paralyzes us, but can actually prevent us from recognizing the possibilities for love that exist all around us. If we believe the world is a chaotic, stressful, and fearful place, then eventually that will become our reality. What about the experience of Gayle Seminara-Mandel, whose story you’ll read in a subsequent chapter? I’ve read that increases in estrogen and decreases in testosterone have a calming effect on men as they get older. Maybe there was a way we could open up to the kind of love I hoped in my heart was possible between two people committed to each other? I’d scream into pillows and cry so hard I could barely ?nd the energy to drag myself up off the ground.
My sister joked that we should send her ?owers because the peace I was starting to feel all by myself was beyond the joy I had ever felt being married.
Each day, he was getting closer and closer—I had no doubt—which made it somewhat hard not being obsessed with how I would recognize him when he arrived. A few weeks later, while he was again looking at the map, I was a little nervous but shared the story about his name being in the box. After all, I married my husband, thinking we would be life partners, as in always together until death do us part (or longer), but life is long, and people change and evolve. No matter what mistakes you have made in the past, you are still going to wake up every day and have access to air and water. When it was time to go house hunting, the very ?rst home we saw had a master bedroom with this same view, the same carpet, and the same wooden frame around the windows.
I was a little skeptical, but I was also ready for a change, so I decided to give it a try. I knew she would be beautiful, deeply spiritual, healthy, nurturing, kindhearted, loving, and loyal.
I had so many doubts, and one day it dawned on me that this was exactly the reason I was stuck. We spent our honeymoon on Kauai, and one day as we were swimming together in a tropical pool, I noticed a special rock formation where the aquamarine water was ? owing through.
You can also place it in the relationship corner of your bedroom (more about this in chapter 3) as a reminder of all you have to offer and all you are ready to receive. Now is the time to see yourself as you want your beloved to see you and to treat yourself as you would have him or her treat you.
It is my hope that this younger generation will have the love in their hearts to not only bring revolution to governments, but to the most intimate aspects of life like who we find ourselves in love with. It’s filled with much truth and love, and I do believe that for those looking for a lifetime partner, this book will certainly bring you one step closer to finding Mr. So, believing and knowing that your soulmate is out there is a critical ?rst step in the formula for manifesting him or her into your life.
Sporting a post- facial blotchy face and sweatpants, she ended up working out next to her future husband on the exercise bikes at the gym where she found herself on a dateless New Year’s Eve. Trying to hold up our teenage son, who felt that a nuke had just been detonated in our living room. I knew if I didn’t purge this man, his betrayal, and our lost life from every possible ?ber of my being, I’d be left emotionally handicapped—with a fraction of my self-esteem—wholly in danger of being forever jaded toward men, love, and the very institution of marriage I so believed in. I wasn’t remotely ready to be physically intimate with anyone, other than a few kisses, and I didn’t bring anyone home to meet my son. This was crazy to me, because I had just had an amazing date with a man named Chris the previous week. Regardless, the fun, passion, and gentleness that Chris has already brought into my life feel so deep and profoundly healing that it’s as if he has helped wash away a world of pain. That’s right, when you are ready, take the needle and puncture that latex bubble, watching it explode and disappear into thin air.
If marrying your soulmate is what you desire, feel free to add engagement rings, wedding rings, wedding cakes, or anything else that is a symbol of marriage or commitment. The woman I was meant to attract was no match for the doubts I had allowed to run rampant in my mind. I asked Judy to lean back under the waterfall so I could take a picture, and I caught a glimpse of the magic of the Universe. Second, even though I can certainly see a jumps in reasoning you make, I am not confident of how you seem to unite the details which help to make the conclusion.
I decided then and there that all the good men were taken or at least not living in my city—maybe I needed to move? Sean Roach, whose story you will also read, was ?ying back from a three-week trip to Australia, wondering if he would ever ? nd the right woman to marry and start a family with. If harmony is what you bring, I’m happy to trade in the roller-coaster highs and lows for a few wrinkles. Maybe even years.” When friends told me I shouldn’t date seriously for a year, my therapist’s words helped bolster my inner knowing. But he was so busy transitioning into a different aspect of his work, and we hadn’t connected about another date yet. And his love has helped me feel safe enough to establish good communications with my ex, both for the sake of our son and to honor the good we did share over so many years.
For the moment I will, no doubt yield to your point but trust in the future you actually link the facts better. I had a hard time believing I would ever ?nd someone who could really see (and love) all sides of me: the serious career woman, the playful girl, and the tender lover inside of me.
After an argument erupted in the aisle, he stood up to defend the ? ight attendant from the harsh words of a rude passenger and found himself gazing into the eyes of his future wife. I’d been hoping he would call but was regretfully becoming resigned to the fact that he might not.
The picture I took that day was the exact picture from my dream board: the brunette in the bathing suit with long hair, being caressed by a waterfall, with the look of ecstasy that had so captivated me. Do you think Englishman David Brown had any way of knowing he would one day wake up with a cell-phone number running through his head, send a text message to it, and end up striking up a friendship with the owner of the phone that would ultimately blossom into love? I know many very attractive, successful, single people who have some very negative, limiting beliefs when it comes to ?nding their soulmates.
I was in no mood to lose many months or years keeping myself safe because of someone else’s idea of how I should recover from this loss.
You just need to remember the love that you are, and once you do, the Universe will bring you more of it. The next day, I showed him the cutout of his name and said, “Where do you want me to put it?” He looked at my Treasure Map and told me to paste it in the section I had created on marriage. I was de?nitely more attracted to him than any of the other men I’d dated (or, truthfully, anyone I’d met or seen out in the world during my nineteen years of marriage).
I looked at him to see if he was teasing, but he just smiled and told me again to paste it there. I would clean up my life and make the space for him to curl up in the lap of what I knew I still had left to give.




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