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These are manly things, but there is no greater expression of masculine a€?do-it-yourselfa€? savvy than ordering a load of gravel. Recently I became a homeowner and came of age, asserting my manhood by ordering a load of gravel.
For example, he must become a€?handy.a€? He must familiarize himself with the structure of his home from top to bottom. When a homeowner receives the dump trucka€™s noble payload on his driveway, he can bristle with pride as the whole neighbourhood awakens to his gumption. One thinga€™s for sure, though: when it arrives, Ia€™ll be waiting in my driveway, clad in manly boots and perhaps a bandana, with shovel in hand.


He mustna€™t let on if he doesna€™t know the ina€™s and outa€™s of, say, the toilet system.
One thing I knew for sure was that I wanted a dump truck, preferably a masculine-coloured dump truck adorned with mud, to come and deposit onto my driveway a respectable mound of gravel. I knew there must be a standard depth of gravel, a desirable depth of gravel, but this miserable voice would never tell me what it was. I will gesticulate with the shovel in a masculine way and guide the dump truck to exactly the right spot where it can deposit its payload.
Suddenly I could remember seeing gravel that was nothing more than little pebbles, but on the other hand Ia€™d seen it come in large rocky fragments too.


As much as I didna€™t want to broach that subject now, at the eleventh hour, there was no way around it. If the resulting gravel mound is too big or too small, Ia€™ll explain to anyone whoa€™ll listen that ita€™s a matter of personal preference. Preferably it should be large enough to convey to my neighbours that I was involved in a substantial and manly project, not some piddling garden job.



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