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While these are all pretty weird, none of them are quite as bizarre as My Forged Wedding, a dating sim where players pretend to have a pretend wedding. Here’s the premise: You’re a recent college grad with no employment prospects traveling to Tokyo to stay with your uncle, who is the “president of one of those tech companies that is so hot right now.” (Timely! After you get off the train, you meet a sexy, mysterious stranger who asks you to be his fake bride. I chose Kyoichi, the “big shot diplomat,” because his cheekbones reminded me of Christian Bale and because the other characters’ storylines were $3.99 each.
As you play the game, it turns into a choose-your-own-adventure-type story that culminates in the two of you falling in love and raising a family together. My Forged Marriage is brought to you by Voltage Inc., the maker of such other dating sims as Kissed By The Baddest Bidder, 10 Days with my Devil, and Be My Princess. The drone is dwarfed by its own controller, yet it flies with the stability of a drone three times the size. Douchebag Workout 2Workout at the gym to build up self esteem and muscles so you can score with chicks. Douchebag WorkoutBulk up as much as possible so that the ladies finally start noticing you!


Galaxy Angel Date Sim Date RPGYour ship has crashed and you are rescued onto a ship full of girls! Other Age Second EncounterSummon and date girls from any place, time or space using the Luv machine. Love Hina Sim Date RPGCreate your character and seduce sweet girls in this simulation dating game.
College RomanceMeet and date five different college girls, as you learn about who they are. Speed Dating 2Flirt with five different people in five different scenarios to get a date.
Elf Sim Date 2Talk with several elf girls, in order to get a date and win their hearts.
Final Fantasy Sim Date RPGGet the cute anime girls from final fantasy games to go on a date with you.
There was LovePlus, a game that inspired thousands of men to pledge their everlasting love to virtual (and, surprisingly, volatile) girlfriends. Relevant!) I chose the name “Kimberly Karmichael,” which is the name I used in middle school when I went into chatrooms to cybersex with strangers.


All of them appear to be conceptually similar to My Forged Marriage, and they all seem to cater to the same adolescent girl fantasies of being swept off your feet by a wealthy, high-cheekboned, secretly soft-hearted bad boy.
There was Jurassic Heart, where you play a high school girl who falls in love with a Tyrannosaurus Rex. These fantasies are derivative and silly and sexist and totally eyeroll-worthy, but if this is how young Japanese girls are getting their ya-yas out before they start meeting boys and having sex IRL, then more power to them. Japanese sim date games usually are based on a point distribution scheme as you level up your character while other games require you to pick the best line. At the very least, it’s probably healthier than what Kimberly Karmichael did when she was their age. But I could easily see how the game, with its meta “pretending to pretend to be married” conceit, would be addictive if you were a 14 year old Japanese girl who was tired of stealing her mom’s translated E.L.



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