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You have a clear vision of what you want, and nothing is going to stop you from getting it.
We are wives, mothers, co-authors, dating coaches, and have been best friends for the last 30 years. We began to notice that the women who played hard to get, either deliberately or by accident, were the ones who got the guys, while the women who asked guys out or were too available were the ones who got dumped. Disclaimer: We are not licensed to practice psychology, and The Rules is not intended to replace psychological counseling, but is simply a dating philosophy based on our own experiences and those of thousands of women who have contacted us.

One of the favorite questions MCs and DJs like to ask any idol guest on their show is the famous, "Who or what is your ideal type?" A Sometimes, idols give vague answers using certain characteristics they like while others give a specific name.After rounding up a lot of the names mentioned before in relation to idols' ideal types, this is what we came up with. Want the formula for being desirable and mysterious in text messages, on Facebook, and via Skype? We came up with the idea for a self-help dating book called The Rules after many, many dinners with single girlfriends at the now-defunct Sung Chu Mein, a Chinese restaurant on the Upper East Side in New York City—it was sort of like Sex and the City, but before Sex and the City! Like most women our age, we were career-minded with our own apartments, but we also wanted to get married.

We had no idea The Rules would become a bestseller… we just wanted to help women stop making mistakes and get the men of their dreams—and that’s what we still do now, 20 years later! Today, Ellen is married with two children and lives in New York, and Sherrie is married with a teenage daughter and lives in New Jersey.

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