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By "GOD'S " grace and mercy I learned that each person needs to spend time alone, to know ones own self,  and I learn this is especially true if you have come out of a marriage or relationship, that was never the "ALMIGHTY" plan for your life in the first place. A little over a month ago, I  joined an online  Relationship and Dating site,  for months maybe even a year or more I felt a desire to do so, especially when I saw or heard the one for Christians that said find "GOD'S" match for "you".
He wanted to come there and marry,  but as I have  a real fear of parts of Africa,  and thought he was trying to get  visa he said he would  live wherever I chose to live.
There is no way for any of us, or for you, to tell how sincere this man is so early in the game.
Even though Muslims tend to marry fairly quickly to reduce temptation, sincere individuals also care about proving themselves as needed and making their potential mate feel secure. OP: A close friend works are also Muslims and they said they do not date or have girlfriends She said both bosses knew they were blessed with the right woman and so they choose to marry. I was honestly going to write that this man is fraudulent, lying to you, after you citizenship , or money;until you mentioned that you're both close to 50.
He could be legitimate but you should NEVER send him money (no matter what he says is the reason but especially if he's been "detained" or "needing money for a work project" or "stranded while traveling" etc).
Only time reveals the truth about a person, so time is what needs to be given to your situation.


You both are older, so the fortunate thing is that you've both probably been in relationships and had experiences that has given you some ideas of what to look for in someone who is being honest.
The big issue here is the fact that you both will have a lot of challenges culturally, religiously and personally to sort out, and I advise those be ironed down to mutual satisfaction. Just because of your age or other aspects doesn't mean you need to resign yourself to being single for the rest of your life. If he is located in a west African country, I would be especially concerned because Internet scams and fraud are prevalent there.
And if you choose to meet him in his country, learn all the laws about how marriage could affect our legal status and any other potential dangers.
To make an initial connection may besok but it is important to meet the person in real life with other family members or a friend. Hope surfing the net you will find this post and smile cause the smiling is contagious, changes your mood, brings positive reactions, relieves stress! It is difficult to think of negative things while smiling! You aren't young and hormonal, so it's just an issue of taking the time to get to know one another until you also feel this is the step you want to take. A man who is trying to rush marriage against your feeling comfortable with it is either out for something more than just a wife, or he is completely lacking in understanding about your needs or cultural background and would probably not be an ideal spouse for you anyway.


If, several months from now, you still have misgivings about certain aspects, he may not be the right person for you. They represent themselves to be middle aged men and they target lonely middle aged American women. I prayed and asked "GOD" about a mate, and I clearly heard "Middle Eastern, in my ear,  and whenever  I even wondered if I'd be alone, I could hear the same Middle Eastern.
There are many men out there who are looking for someone like you, so there is not just one option here.
There was  something about this man made me feel at peace, so on the second day,  we became friends.
In many countries people are in deep poverty and they do not care to use anyone who is vulnerable to get what they want.



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