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admin 18.07.2015

It was the feminist dream of the 1960s a€“ a world in which men and women share the load equally.
History repeating: Wedding bliss in the 1950sMore than 1,500 adults were asked about the attributes that they a€?most valueda€™ in a spouse or partner.
Nearly 40 per cent said a€?financial stabilitya€™ is one of the most important qualities in their husband and they rank gardening as more important than an ability to cook or clean.
April 11, 2015 by The Naive Idealist 3 Comments LikeTweetOne man dared to asked the question about what women want in a dance. They say romance is dead, that there is no excitement or mystery, that the feelings of being special have been relegated to a lost past.
Authors Note : A special thanks to those women who answered my questions honestly and I hope I did your answers justice. I tried my best to stick to what they wrote down for me but as with everything I write it also comes from my own perspective.
Why It Is Urgent for Men to Empower Women EntrepreneursMen dominate 75% of conversations and decision-making in groups. Five Reasons We Are Desperate for Another Option in 2016We are less than six months from the presidential elections of 2016, and I have absolutely no idea what to do. Are Your Company’s Values Burning Out Your Employees?Do your daily practices align with your stated values? Get Your Good Men Project Merchandise: Now Available For A Limited Time!The Good Men Project presents the Good Merch Project, unveiling its collection of t-shirts and swag.
How to Make a Fresh Start in a New City“I am single and the job will be demanding, but I want to make social connections.
A Motivational Dad Struggles: How Do I Thrill My Brilliant Son About College?Bill Douglas is motivational divorced dad who has inspired hundreds. Hope Never Comes From a LeprechaunSome days we feel like someone who was tricked by a leprechaun into taking fool’s gold, only to find ourselves with an empty black pot.
If you are reading this it means that you want to know the secret to getting and keeping a good man in 5 days. Over the last few weeks I have been battling whether or not I would write this blog, but today I read something that gave me the confirmation to do it. For the ladies who cherish the men they have, this blog is not for you this is strictly for those of us who haven’t mastered that art just yet. February 1, 2013 By admin Leave a Comment Every February I write my Pastor’s Note on the theme of love. What distinguishes the value ofthe pride in these two different circumstances is the object of that pride. Tanya Jackson, corporate affairs manager at the building society, said: a€?A lot of women used to think they wanted a metrosexual man. Although minstrels created their own tales, often they would memorize and embellish the works of others. But I dared to ask what women want in a dance and women are still looking, searching, longing for romance, yet at the same time seem hesitant to acknowledge it. It involved about 4 or 5 dance friends on Facebook and another three or four in conversation. So that we are on the same page in 5 days meaning 1,2,3,4,5 days I will give you the secrets. It seems, and this is just my heavily observed opinion- that we have fallen more in love with the idea of wanting a man than actually knowing what to do with a man. For the ladies, who do the opposite I want to start by saying we have to do so much better.
How can I match that, for example, if you do not want him to be a momma’s boy, can you match that with not telling your mother all of relationship drama.
If you are proud of what God has done in others, for example, you are proud of your parents who have been blessed to see their grandchildren, that is good! According to research published today, most men want a traditional wife a€“ and women are often only toohappy to oblige.In turn, it claims that the husband women most desire is a a€?retrosexuala€™ a€“ meaning they are more hunter gatherer than a a€?metrosexuala€™ stay-at-home father.
In one breathe they say dancing isn’t about romance, it’s about presence, openness, excitement, mystery and feeling special yet is this not the very definition of romance.
We treat men like new shoes they blow our mind when we first see them, we want to show them off, take care of them, and keep them close when they still have that new smell.
I have seen these wish lists of the perfect man and all the things that he has to do for us and provide us emotionally, physically, and sexually.
For my February notes I have been working through the description of love found in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7. This series was inspired by Luke Davis, whose eye for story and ear for lyrical prose are featured here.
There is a strange duality afoot where they rightly don’t believe in the prince charming form of romance yet can perfectly describe romance as if reading from a dictionary. You see chivalry is about the wellbeing of your fellow partner, that they are protected from the mire. They want to believe you won’t hurt them, to trust that they won’t be dipped suddenly or trodden on. A lady would like to feel graceful, poised and alive; it’s the thrill they search for in every dance. I hear them talk and see how they act; they are avoiding the cliche but they embrace the essence of romance.


Then reality sets in and we do one of a few things: get bored and want something new, lose interest, or we work hard and cherish what we have. Share or message your boyfriend with the best quotes to make him remember you all the time. So far we have taken some time to consider that love is patient, kind, does not envy and, last year, does not boast.
When those I love are used and blessed by God I am extremely proud of them and am grateful to God. If boasting is what spills out of our mouths and body language, pride is what lurks within and prompts it.
But also commit yourself to digging beneath boasting and uncover any areas of unhealthy pride that might foster the growth of boasting. More than 2.1million women say they do not work because they are a€?looking after their family or homea€™. As men we assume the romance that we read is the romance we need to give but should we not look to the actions of women who find what they are looking for in a dance partner. A woman would like to know that while in your arms you offer surety and safety, that their steps will be led with precision, their trust in you well placed.
They allow you close; they allow you to hold them and they allow you to lead them, and for three minutes they want to trust you that you won’t violate that closeness. They want you to find out how skilled they are and be pushed to the edge of that skill, but no further. They want you to feel them on the other side of the connection; they want to know you can feel them as much as they feel you.
Do not listen to what you assume, they know the cliches are meaningless; they don’t seek a replication of some lines from a book. If you somehow manage to stop boasting but never deal with pride, I can only imagine that a great discontent and bitterness will become a wider and deeper reality in your heart.
Only 193,000 men gave the same answer a€“ a figure which has fallen by 6 per cent over the past year. They would like to close their eyes and feel the music’s heartbeat knowing that they shall not collide with others on the floor.
They want to trust you won’t treat them like an object to throw around, or that they aren’t there for your pleasure. They want to be lost in your lead, lost in a world of movement and connection, not knowing what comes next but feeling it nonetheless. This is the dilemma we as men face, what we think women want against what women truly want. They say chivalry is dead yet I hear women talk and see how they act, they may agree chivalry is dead but the man who treats her with respect also gains their respect. They say that trust is dead yet I hear women talk and see how they act, they may agree everyone is in it for themselves yet a man who is open, honest and vulnerable to his partners needs will find that openness, honesty and vulnerability is returned. No, the excitement they seek is when music and moves flow together, when their heart beats to the tune of their feet and their body comes alive. They want to know that every fibre of your being is concentrated on the dance and them, and through that connection they will feel this too. They want that directed at them so for three minutes they feel special, graceful and alive, that this dance is just for them.
They say that excitement has been lost yet I hear women talk and see how they act, they may agree excitement is hard to find but I see their flushed cheeks after a good dance and if as a man the dance has been exciting there is a good chance she feels the same. They say that mystery has been lost yet I hear women talk and see how they act, they may agree they are looking for perfection but I have seen lesser dancers become sought after partners because of this very air of mystery. It’s your gift to them, your presence, and in a dance woman know that this is what they truly want.
Good men who hew to a code of morality and decent conduct in their personal and professional lives. Good men who don’t need to be bad boys to prove themselves.And these good men are not hiding. The weary commuter coming home on the late evening train with a bunch of flowers on the empty seat next to him. Many are available and looking for a good partner—a person who shares their values, appreciates their efforts, and treats them with respect. Recently, a reader wrote in to The Good Men Project and asked if we could provide her with a guide to how to court a good man.So here’s our answer. He doesn’t need to know all your secrets, at least not at the beginning of your relationship. But there’s no greater turn off than his catching you in a lie about something a few weeks or a few months into your relationship.
We all have dirty laundry—things we regret in our past, dysfunctional family members, financial issues—and it’s crucial to be truthful about these from the start. A good man is unlikely to ask too many probing questions or interrogate his potential partners, because he wants to see you in the best light. But if he does ask, or if you’re hiding something for fear he won’t want you if you disclose it to him, you’re much better off getting it in the open and clearing the air before your relationship progresses.
Good men are genuine, willing to be vulnerable, and open to intimacy with someone they trust.
If he keeps a tidy house or apartment and doesn’t like dishes left on the table or laundry thrown on the floor, don’t make fun of his habits; respect the way he treats his home.


If he has activities he values that aren’t your cup of tea, don’t mock him for interests that may seem odd to you. And if he draws a boundary—around his time, his money, his family, or his degree of emotional involvement with you—respect it. Common wisdom says that women test men all the time, but men test women or any potential partner, too, in their own way. A good man doesn’t want someone who’s stepping into his life so that person can walk all over him.3. A good man craves your attention, your genuine interest in his personal and professional life, your focus on him, and your eagerness to learn more about who he is and how he got to be that way.
When he’s talking or telling a story, he wants you to listen and not be texting a friend or answering emails.
If you’re meeting for a date, he wants to be greeted warmly and not feel that you’re distracted. If you’re living together and he’s coming home to you, he wants you to be emotionally available.
If you’re not, he may take refuge in watching sports or other distractions, which will make you feel rejected and start a cycle of resentment that can easily kill the relationship. Your time with a good man is valuable, and he wants to use it to create intimacy.~ A good man wants to know what you like and don’t like, because—wait for it—he actually wants to make you happy. If you’re wishywashy or just go with whatever he likes thinking your accommodating nature will please him, you’re setting yourself up for problems later when you start to feel resentment because your real needs aren’t being met. He knows that meeting them is the key to maintaining a successful relationship, and since he can’t read your mind, he needs you to tell him. He’s also not afraid to say no, which means you don’t need to worry about being too needy or demanding. He wants to please you, but only in ways that are healthy for each of you and for the relationship.5. Chances are a good man has been in one or more relationships with emotionally insecure or dysfunctional partners. They seek out men who are patient and tolerant, who will put up with their crap, who won’t walk away when things get tough because they love strongly and feel responsible for their partner’s welfare and well-being.
A good man who has some experience under his belt has learned to spot the warning signals and to be wary of the red flags. He doesn’t want be your whipping post as you work through your anger over your shitty childhood. If your life is all about the drama at work with your awful boss and catty colleagues, the drama with your parents or siblings with whom you don’t get along, the person on the subway or in the store who looked at you the wrong way, a good man is not going to have any part of it. He’s trying to build a future and a legacy, and he doesn’t have time for an endless soap opera. But if your friend the alcoholic or addict needs to be picked up—again—and brought home to detox or taken to the emergency room, you’ll find yourself on your own.2. If you’re dating and he calls you, he expects you to answer if you’re available or call him back promptly if you’re not.
And if you reach out to him and he doesn’t get back to you right away, it’s because he’s busy, not because he’s ignoring you.
If you press him on this or pepper him with calls and texts asking where he is or suggesting he doesn’t care about you, he will break it off, delete you from his contacts, and block you on his phone. And if you test him in a dishonest or disingenuous way or try to set a trap for him, he will immediately discern that you’re a game player. Relationships are about trust for him, and while he understands that trust is earned, he also knows that it doesn’t need to be constantly proven.3. But if your shtick is that you’re always the victim in every interaction you have, that everything that happens to you is someone else’s fault, you can forget snagging a good man right now.
A good man wants a strong partner who is honest about his or her own contribution in every situation, and he will not allow himself to be unfairly accused or criticized. He’ll give you one chance to grow up, and if you don’t take it, he’ll find someone with greater emotional maturity.4.
He wants you to like and respect him, but he doesn’t want you to worship him or put him on a pedestal from which he can only fall the moment he screws up and lets you down. Honor him, respect him, dig him, be into him, but don’t kiss his feet … unless that happens to be his fetish.5. If you’re wondering how to let him know you’re interested in pursuing a relationship with him, it’s as simple as asking him out and showing him you’re an enjoyable person to be with, a person he’d like to get together with again. He just wants to know you’re not going to get hold of his heart then crush it and stomp on it. He wants it, but he wants it to be meaningful and intimate, to flow from the two of you coming closer together, not to be used as a crutch to achieve closeness. Saying thank you when he does something nice for you, when he shows you kindness and respect, means the world to a good man. He posts daily on his blog, Tom Aplomb, and serves as Editor of Westport’s HamletHub, a local online news and information service.
He is also a featured storyteller with MouseMuse Productions and is working on his first novel.



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