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03.09.2013
Today’s post was inspired by the presentation I did with three fellow bloggers at the Healthy Living Summit last weekend about handling negativity in the blog world. I am using some of those questions as well as the questions I received from you guys in the comments section of the blog and through emails for this post. When I first began blogging, I assumed the only place a blogger experiences negativity is in the comments section of their posts. Also, I know many bloggers have experienced negativity off the blog in their personal lives from family members, friends, colleagues or peers who don’t support or understand blogging. I know of bloggers have experienced extreme negativity outside their blog – though Twitter, magazine articles and blog posts by other bloggers. I personally have a hard time understanding how people have such anger inside about bloggers and basically make a hobby out of saying mean and hurtful things about other people. That being said, there have been blogs out there that I used to read that seem to pick apart bloggers all the time.
For the most part, I tend to ignore negative comments because many people who say nasty things are just trying to get under your skin. Note: There is a ginormous difference between a negative (evil!) comment and constructive (polite!) criticism. I don’t want to see a fight break out in the comments section of my post and prefer to simply let it go or respond in a way that is both polite and compassionate.
That being said, if a negative comment comes from someone who is not anonymous, I will send them a personal email to ask if I did something to offend or hurt them in any way. This has only happened once since basically all negative comments are anonymous (shocking!), but I have been able to find contact information by being sneaky and locating a commenter’s personal blog or accurate email address by searching for their IP address (a unique number connected to every computer) on the back end of my blog. For more detailed instructions about the techy side of negative comments (looking up IP addresses, moderating and blocking negative comments), definitely check out Healthy Living Blogs this upcoming Thursday where you will find the full tutorial from our presentation posted. I didn’t question the validity of the comment because Ryan and I have a secure relationship and haven’t had any trust issues, but I did feel angry! I looked up the commenter’s IP address and found that she lived in Michigan (a state Ryan has never been to) and eventually I found her personal blog because she had left previous comments on my blog that were not anonymous. It was an eye opening experience for me because it made me realize that many times the negative comments people leave on blogs have nothing to do with the blogger. That being said, I don’t use this train of thought to excuse myself from negative comments. And now, after all this Debbie Downer talk, I leave you with this happy picture of puppy Sadie to make you smile. Although I haven’t experienced much negativity on my blog, I hope that if I ever do, I will handle it with the grace that you do.
When I was younger (in college), I received a really hateful facebook message from a guy I thought was pretty cool, though, and even after deleting it and blocking him, I’ll admit that just thinking about it 5 years later hurts. It is really sad that people with so many personal issues stoop to such pathetic means like intentionally hurting other people’s feelings to try and feel something!


I’ve only been blogging for about 2 months and have ALREADY received my fair share of negative comments. I haven’t received any negative comments (yet!) but when and if I do I will definitely refer back to this post. I also try to refrain from posting anything that might be controversial because I’m horrible at taking criticism, however I want to get away from that.
You pictures of Sadie with the new(ish) addition of the comments make me laugh so hard sometimes, I almost spit my coffee into the computer screen!!!! Each time it pulls up a people listing, it also lists local information for the city in which they live in. Thought I could apply for a "restricted" work license this month, but DMV told me I hadn't driven in so long I needed to apply for a new license -- they then told me I can't even apply because of the support suspension.
We are working on making clips of the video available.November 24, 2006 - Murtari is okay - release date is Dec. We crafted our presentation based on the responses we received to the survey we posted on all of our blogs a couple of weeks ago. This can be very hard to handle since it’s not in your own space where you can defend yourself openly for people to see your side.
It reminds me of high school drama and the group of girls who loved making other people feel inadequate and bullied. Why continue reading something that makes you annoyed or angry… or a blog that simply doesn’t interest you? I used to read these blogs (they’re like a car accident – you can’t look away), but eventually I realized that I never left their blog feeling happy or uplifted.
Most bloggers I know understand the difference and welcome polite differences of opinion or criticism, but blatant attacks on a blogger are a whole separate beast.
I was a public relations major in college and I always say that studying PR helped me more in blogging than any of my other jobs after college. This brings up all comments they’ve ever left on my blog – both positive comments that were not anonymous and the negative ones that were. There have even been times when the nastiness of a comment has made me question whether or not I wanted to continue blogging. One negative commenter (anonymous, of course) commented on my blog when Ryan was away on his bachelor cruise (and therefore unreachable). The commenter is often dealing with personal demons or bad things on their end and the blogger becomes an easy target for negativity. A comment that makes me immediately become defensive makes me wonder if there’s some truth behind it.
I loved hearing about your insight, and hope that I will handle any negative comments the same way.
I will just have to remind myself that haters are gonna hate, and when people act out in a disrespectful way it is because the problem lies with THEM, not with YOU.


They can be extremely discouraging but I just need to keep in mind that those are the people who just want to bring me down! I do my best to always remember that and just feel sorry for them instead of getting angry. I think my blogging style would improve greatly if I wasn’t always afraid that I was going to offend someone or make them think less of me.
I’ve yet to deal with a real negative comment but I definitely foresee it being very difficult for me to let it roll of my back. Under the People Search, I did a search for my name and surprisingly enough, it pulled up a listing which gave my name, age, and address. This information includes the population, total households in the area, median age, and median household income. Once again though, the information can be out-dated so it’s not best to rely on this information as 100% correct. In the nearly two years that I have been blogging, I’ve seen or heard of negativity in the form of blog comments, tweets, emails, magazine articles and blog posts by other bloggers to name a few. It’s your blog and your space and you deserve to delete comments that you feel are inappropriate. When someone says “I hate you, you’re ugly” or something of the sort, I would love to say “Well aren’t you a peach?” and then go kick them in the shins, but then aren’t I just perpetuating the negativity?
She said something along the lines of “Just wanted to let you know I saw Ryan kissing a brunette girl the other day. Hopefully I will get to that point and if I receive any negative comments or feedback, I hope I can handle them the way you do! Knowing how deep my own insecurities are, some people do not know how to deal with them and are jealous and lash out out at others for fun. If I had to pick one feature that stood out with this service, it’s definitely their People Search and neighbor finder. Comments that are wildly profane or inappropriate or those that attack loved ones will always be deleted. I hope you enjoy little glimpses into my life and have fun trying the sweaty workouts I frequently share and making some of my favorite recipes along the way! For example, it listed one neighbor that I knew had moved away over a year ago, but still, I was impressed.



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