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I think we do a huge disservice to our children when we stress self-esteem instead of self-respect.
For more posts on the topic of Children, visit Bridget Chumbley’s place, One Word at a Time. When we understand that before anything else we are sons and daughters of the Living God, it will change the way we look at ourselves.
Amen…I think we, as a society, are seeing the consequences of placing so much emphasis on self esteem in recent years. We are relational creatures and we find our way through our primary relationship with our creator, who loves us dearly. Tremendous teaching…I hope this makes it to every parents email, blog or whatever…just so they see this truth! Confidence is one of my favorite traits, as I believe lack of confidence and self-esteem is one of the easiest ways to sell ourselves short. So confidence and esteem can be gained by changing our outer reality, by it is most often gained by changing our inner one.
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She’s a back-to-work mom who took a position as a low-level office assistant despite her educated background.

An individual with a healthy self-respect “likes” themselves — even when encountering the inevitable failures in life. If they sold self-esteem in the Sky Mall catalog, it would like like a smiling (but evil) Buddha.
Being the mother of a 11-year-old girl going on 16 or something, I’m dealing with this on a daily basis. She was grossly underpaid and overqualified for the job and was too timid to speak up during the negotiation phase of her interview process.
To esteem something is to “hold in high regard.” Self-respect and self-esteem are quite different. While on the other hand, you raised an excellent point, it’s almost like self-respect is not even part of the equation. When life is lived in fellowship with him, to his glory, all the rest falls into its proper place.
But my Dad has long insisted that Self-esteem is bogus, and I think self-respect got thrown out with it, because us kids got neither. As Joan mentioned in her latest blog, Is Low Self-Confidence Killing Your Career, you don’t have to be captain of the football team or an outspoken salesman to meet the confidence mark. Self-esteem balances precariously upon a comparison with someone who’s always “a little better.” When we esteem someone or something, we face serious trouble if we do not measure up to those standards.
But by showing up prepared (doing research about the company, building up your professional brand, and practicing your career story), you can easily boost your self worth.

Our esteem may ebb and flow, whereas a healthy self-respect (liking ourselves) is always grounded in what we are (and are not) — not in what we can or cannot accomplish.
He takes any type of discipline as if they were directed at his spirit and not his actions. Theresa may have prepped for her interview just enough to land the job, but low self-confidence caused her to doubt her abilities and distrust her judgment.
Yes, a good self-respect will help him some, but if he doesn’t (with the help of his counselor) work through these things that are tearing him down, he will have no self-esteem and therefore will have no self-respect.
If Theresa doesn’t take proactive measures, she’ll engage in passive behaviors that’ll inevitably undermine her success, making her less likely to win promotions, raises, or higher positions in the future.
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