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Besides being a novelist in the romance, mystery and nonfiction genres, I’m also a private investigator. After verifying Sara’s history, I started working the case, first by tracking down a group of 1956 alumni from that high school. I found a cousin, a middle-aged woman, who remembered Nancy, mostly from stories her mother, Nancy’s aunt, had told her.
I kept following trails of information, eventually found a residential address for Nancy in Virginia, from the early 1970s. Frustrated, I started working other information…hoping for a lead to someone else who might have known Nancy. I explained to Nancy that the niece of her first husband, who had recently died, wanted to find her because he had apparently left some things for her. She told me she’d lost her second husband a few years back, and was now living alone. In the past this did not matter, not enough of our lives were chronicled online to worry about what happened when people “Googled” us and few of us had our names out in the public domain.
For a growing number of women, this creates personal and professional difficulties as her past becomes untraceable. When Mashable writer Samantha Murphy Kelly told her own tale of two names, she asked Google for a comment. A +Forbes  article suggests ways to mitigate the challenge but acknowledged that by changing her name a woman becomes a like British Petroleum when it became BP: in need of a rebranding campaign. This is hardly an earth-shaking problem, but it does and will effect a very large number of women (and perhaps a few men) and as more of our world moves online, perhaps a new approach is needed. Filed Under: Empty Nest, Social media Tagged With: Family, Marriage, name change, womenSubscribe! Want to news, articles and information about parenting teens and young adults delivered to your inbox?
I wonder if the tradition of taking the husband’s last name has become archaic anyway?

It might be and I certainly can see both side of the issue, but as long a women are changing their names, there should be a way to find them.
Interesting food for thought…I did change my name almost 20 years ago and that was before I started writing, etc. My concern if for women, young women really, who are establishing themselves and then will just disappear in search if they change their names. As a former university lecturer in Gender studies, I can say that if I could go back there is no way I would take my husband’s name. I am really agnostic on name changes, just think it is time for technology to acknowledge the practice. Fortunately, a few remembered the uncle, but none could recall his high school sweetheart Nancy being in their class.
Day after day, in-between other cases, I’d pick up the threads for Nancy again and continue the search. Didn’t know why he was connected to Nancy, but apparently they had known each other well. But all this has changed and any accomplishment or indeed any information that is searchable by or about a woman who has changed her name, suddenly becomes untraceable. The cousin recalled Nancy living with their family when the cousin was a small child, but she didn’t recall the circumstances or why Nancy had been there. Had studied everything I could about the uncle, learned bits and pieces about this mysterious Nancy, this young woman who had never left his heart.
When a woman changes her name she begins again with a new identity, which for search purposes, is disconnected from her past. However, as I write about in my memoir, my college boyfriend went to Google (this was pre-Facebook) to track me down, but he didn’t know my married name.
But after years of using my maiden name, I added my married name to my passport because I often traveled internationally with my kids and we were hassled if we weren’t with my husband. But +Google  as opposed to +Google+  does not seem to have a mechanism for merging the two identities many women create by changing their last names.

I like having my own identity under my maiden name, especially now that I’m writing more publicly. I eventually started using both names for my writer’s credit because there was a celeb psychologist in our neighborhood with the same name as mine and people constantly mixed us up. Through that single connection, I started unearthing other leads, names…made phone calls to people who also seemed connected to Nancy in some way, left them voice messages. When I wrote a book, I went back to my maiden name (even though my husband’s name is arguably cooler).
In his will, he had left some items for this woman, and his niece wanted to fulfill his final wishes. So now my drivers license and passport are different from my credit cards, my doctor’s records, tax forms, etc. About us Use of this site constitutes acceptance of the Terms of use, Cookie policy, and Privacy policy of eHow. Although the woman you seek may have changed her name, it is unlikely that her parents or brother have. The information you receive will be the family history, and perhaps a family tree depicting all family members.
From that, you may be able to find additional relatives to assist in locating the woman you seek.
Or you may find the family line she married into, thus locating her new last name and another avenue for searching. Although she may have changed her name, she may still use her maiden name in these social outlets to aid connection with past friends.

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