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Gregory Frank, co-founder of DivorceForce, an online community that connects people going through divorce and offers post-divorce life advice, gave us some advice on how to get over your ex, regardless of the circumstances. Frank says that mourning is totally normal, and, in fact, he encourages it. Mourning a breakup instead of ignoring it is an essential part of eventually being able to move on in the future.
While mourning is a totally normal part of the process, you don’t want mourning to turn into moping, because that gives more power to your ex than they deserve.
Frank says keeping yourself busy will give you less time to think about the past, which will lower your risk of wallowing.
Frank says it’s best to pick a hobby that you’ve always been curious about but perhaps have never tried. Or, if there’s a hobby you loved that your ex didn’t, and you didn’t get to do it much while you two were together, do that. This is, Frank says, one of the tougher aspects of getting over your ex, but it’s also one of the most important.
In the end, Frank says, “You really owe it to yourself to soul-search about why the relationship ended.
You shouldn’t be consumed by a break-up to the point that it interferes with the rest of your life, but, at the same time, devastation happens.
Frank says you’re ready to date when you can emotionally get through a date and engage in conversation.
Is it time to dust yourself off, get over your ex, and start moving beyond the whole divorce drama?
Reasons to Repurpose or Sell Your Wedding RingWhat once symbolized joy and happiness now sits in the bottom of your jewelry box. Best Way to Sell an Engagement Ring after DivorceAfter a bad marriage and a bad divorce, many women are ready to get rid of this symbol of eternal love.
Slideshare uses cookies to improve functionality and performance, and to provide you with relevant advertising. How to Get Over Your Ex Girlfriend Learn Why Most Guys FAIL to Get Over an Ex GirlfriendIf you just got dumped, there’s probably a part of you that feels shocked and confused right now.You might still be wondering what happened. Because we forget that women are EMOTIONAL creatures.When our girlfriend tells us that she wants to break up with us, we almost always demand anexplanation. Why Her Reason for Leaving Doesn’t Make SenseBecause her decision to break up with you is an EMOTIONAL decision, the LOGICAL reasonsshe gives you won’t make all that much sense.
Whether you were together for six months or married for ten years, whether it was an amicable split or a shouting-match, parting ways with someone you cared about (and probably do still care about) feels terrible.
So when you’re sad about a breakup, swallowing that sadness is the last thing you want to do. But Frank says that friends can get tired of listening to you work through your breakup if they perceive you’re holding onto things for too long.
Take, for instance, DivorceForce, which has forums where people going through divorce can come together and offer support. You can usually come to a resolution faster than if you were to talk through things with someone who hasn’t recently broken up, Frank says. You’ll also most likely fall into bed exhausted each night, and getting a good night of sleep is a key component of maintaining good mental health. Getting over your ex won’t happen overnight, and sometimes it takes a long time to deal with the damage of a particularly rough breakup, but it is possible.
While you can't totally wipe the slate clean, there are steps you can take to stop thinking about him all the time so you can concentrate on enjoying the life you have now.


Experiencing lingering thoughts and dwelling on your former spouse is natural, but can hinder your healing progress. Music, pictures, items purchased together, gifts and so on are better off being set aside at least for a period of time.
But if you allow yourself to look deep within, it can be a huge opportunity for personal growth.
Maybe you’ve already tried to figure out why shebroke up with you but all she said was vague stuff about how she needs some “space” and howshe just wants to be by herself right now.And I’m sure you felt a really strong urge to try to get her back when she first broke thenews to you.
But cutting off thedead leaves isn’t going to make the new one’s grow healthy, it’s just going to cover up the factthe fact that the tree is dead.
To boot, online users usually don’t know your ex, so they are more likely to offer unbiased advice. It’s also a great place to release anger and sadness.” He also says that the endorphins released by exercise will help you recover. You’ll be better off in the long-term if you can own up to your own flaws and start working on bettering yourself.
Of course, there are plenty of sources to go to for divorce support, however, I believe in teaching self-empowerment so you get the big "win!" at the end of the day.
We tend to thinkthat if we can just manage to understand why she’s breaking up with us, we can convince her tostay. Shemight say things like, “I wasn’t really looking for a relationship” or “I just want to be by myselfright now”Often times, the reasons that women give us don’t make sense and we spend weeks and months,reading into what she said and trying to figure out her real reason for leaving.This was probably the biggest challenges I had when I was trying to get over her. If you really want to revive it, you have to go to the root and fix it.Well, this applies to relationships too.
Here are my best practice tips for getting over him and moving on!Examine the expectations you've placed on yourself.Are you expecting to neutralize all positive feelings you have towards your ex? Paint a room or wall a new color, rearrange the furniture, get new bedding, explore new hair styles, or indulge in a new pair of strappy, colorful heels that make you feel alive, youthful, and sexy again. We promise to change,we apologize, we explain, we rationalize, we justify, we beg, we plead, we cry… and the listcan go on and on.The truth is, we’ll do just about ANYTHING we can to try to change the situation. As if it’s just some little misunderstanding that we can clear up and then everything will beokay. I spent somany nights playing “connect the dots” in my head trying to figure out why she broke up withme. But a lot of the times, we don’t realize there’s actually a“root” problem behind all of the little problems. What Most Guys Forget is that You CANNOT Convince a Woman to FEEL Differently with “Logic” and “Reasoning” That’s Because Emotions Do NOT Operate Under the Laws of Logic!Trying to override what she’s feeling with logic and reasoning is like putting foreign currencyinto a vending machine and expecting your drink to come out. I thought that if I could just figure out her reason, I could convince her to take me back byacknowledging my mistakes and providing a flawless explanation that demonstrated myunderstanding of the problem, followed by an apology and a sincere promise that thingswill be different.And although it actually did help me get her back a couple times, it never really lasted.
Bring out your journal and write the story of your relationship (or record it in your voice). It won’t work.So why do we act like we can change her mind if we just find the right thing to say? What You Need to Realize if You Truly Want to Get Over Your Ex GirlfriendIf she felt strongly enough to actually want to end the relationship, it’s probably not just becauseof a couple fights or disagreements you guys had.
We’dpatch things up and everything would be great for a while but after 2-3 weeks, some little thingwould come up again and then we were back on the verge of breaking up all over again.And there I was, demanding another explanation, wanting to know her reason for breaking upwith me.
If you don’t, you’ll be too “caught up in the storm” to see past all the chaosand really get the big picture.


While society may have us believe that we should "just get over it", and "he was no good for you", it's just not that simple. It’s probably something serious, and mostlikely, one of the bigger problems in your relationship. However, what I failed to realize is that every reason she gave me was just a symptomof the REAL problem. Who made it "bad" to love another just because you're not in a relationship anymore? What would happen if you just accept that you feel love for him, AND that the relationship has run its course?
What I Learned about Getting Over an Ex GirlfriendShe could stand there and point out each individual manifestation of the core issue and I couldkeep trying to remedy all the “symptoms” but it wouldn’t really make a difference in the longrun because I wasn’t tackling the ROOT of the problem.In fact, I didn’t even realize there was a “root” problem.
You have to learn to be okay with the lack of clarityfor now and trust that as you begin to move on with your life, the reason for why it happenedwill begin to reveal itself to you.
That’s because her reason for breaking up with you isn’t just one thing, it’susually an accumulation of reasons that she can’t express very well.In fact, even calling it an accumulation of reasons is actually a misnomer because she’s notbreaking up with you for any particular reason… she’s breaking up with you based on anEMOTION. I was convinced that the problems in ourrelationship were all of these little symptoms that she was describing. I know just how difficult this is from my own experience so Ican definitely say that it’s MUCH easier said than done.
When I discovered this and used it in my own life, it brought great relief to accept that just because the relationship was over didn't necessarily mean I had to let go of my love for him. You can burn the items (along with your written or picture story board if you choose) and spread the ashes at sea, on a cliff, or at the base of a tree. I thought that if I couldjust manage to resolve all the things she mentioned, everything would be okay.
Know that this is true in your life and your relationships just as much as it is true of nature.Above all, be patient with yourself as you work through the various ways to get over your ex. I could keep trying to treat each individual symptombut it wouldn’t make a difference unless I eliminated the root problem that was causingall of these symptoms to arise.
How can this relationship be a stepping stone towards something even better, greater, and more intimate, etc.? Realize that you can’t get over your ex-girlfriend and move on with your lifeif you keep living in the past.3. What did you learn from this past relationship? Right after my divorce, I made a list of all the qualities I wanted in my next relationship. Remind yourself that everything happens for a reason and trust that the reasonfor why it happened will reveal itself to you over time. Take advantage of them all, and you'll find you are very capable of moving forward more easily than you might have imagined. We had a fabulous relationship, but it lacked certain other characteristics that would make it sustainable. All of life is built upon relationships, so if you can identify a few characteristics that you would like to grow within yourself, there is ample opportunity all around you.
Set a new challenge for yourself to bring these qualities into your current friendships and even work relationships.
Spend a few minutes daily living this new vision like a movie, seen through your own eyes (vs.



Make your ex really want you back
How to win your ex boyfriend back for good 73


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