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Here is the experience of becoming pro-active in response to bullying as seen on the enneagram or the NTS.
Assertiveness training is necessary in order to train the Attention to act according to Human Rights Values (point-four) and the Golden Rule (point-eight). The important factor at point-six is Will Power, but it may be in the form of Help or Assistance from Bystanders. Now, if through role playing and attention building exercises, we teach, instruct, impart and transfer the knowledge and understanding from the enneagram above to our selves and our students, we can expect to reverse the bullying cycle.
Using the NTS (Nine Term Symbol or Enneagram) it is possible to see exactly which part of the process are lacking and need training for any given student or situation. Point-three, which is The Self, has to do with the real human being and not their acquired personality. What ever level of understanding of the Golden Rule or level of Self Confidence or degree of Help (and so on for every point around the NTS) will determine the outcome of the situation and how intentionally a person can act given the forces from the bully. Assertiveness is an important skill we all should have, as it helps us express what we want to say towards others. Assertiveness, aggression and submission (the third reaction) are results of stress and anxiety in a given situation.
Assertiveness is particularly useful in workplace and business , where one is expected to say things without causing conflict with the other workers as much as possible.
One example of this in a workplace scenario is when one makes a comment to us regarding our personal appearance.
If the comment is negative, our natural reaction would be to defend ourselves and, if possible, get back at the person who made the feedback. However, workplace with words like these is likely to lead to interpersonal conflicts and problems with the company.
You see, sometimes in an office setting, we cannot say what we want to say but instead we have to say what we don't want to say in order to get the results we want.

If being assertive is not natural to you, then you may need to develop it in order to be able to use it.
Assertiveness Cartoons and ComicsAssertiveness cartoon 1 of 54Dislike this cartoon?'Honey, when you grow up I want you to be assertive, independent and strong-willed.
Without training, we assume people can simply do what they are shown through words (basically what they are told) and what they are shown through other media.
Will Power, Conscience and Help can all be understood as aspects of what enters the process at point-six. Self Confidence is a buzz word, and the closer a person comes to essence, the more true self confidence they attain naturally. But how can we prevent assertiveness from being taken as aggression in workplace communication? Most people are confused about which is which, and would refer to being assertive as being aggressive and vice versa. Aggression and assertiveness may sound similar in the force of conversation, but aggressive people actually utter words that are sometimes below the belt and are abrasive. In an argument, one can either choose to become angry and aggressive, to submit passively or even intransigent, or they can choose to assert their own feelings regarding the situation. Being passive or being intransigent, which is being stubborn and inflexible with your opinions, can result to a win-lose situation.
We naturally become angry or irrational when we are subjected to environments from which we may feel pressured and anxious. This is one of the most common and frequent examples of a stressful workplace , because it is natural for a person to make comments regarding how we appear especially if the way we dress is quite unnatural.
This results to more stress between both parties (one of them being stressed more than the other), and is unproductive. But, people can not act until all of these points and inner lines of the Compass (the six labeled lines inside the circle) are working together.

What comes in at point-six and how we define it depends on the situation and on the people involved. Most of these people become irate, and would be irrational, rude and derogatory towards the people they are having a conversation with. On the other hand, assertiveness may help both sides relieve stress because it facilitates a where both sides have aired their feelings and emotions to each other. These rights include the right against mistreatment, and aggressive behavior can be considered mistreating a person through snide comments.
You should know or at least gauge to some point which words could offend a person even if you did not intend to do so. Well, people can try, we can pretend, we can do something, but our actions will not be effective until all of these parts come together into one whole system. Assertiveness is usually mistaken as being aggressive because, in being assertive, we sometimes sound forceful with others.
True, you might be offended and angry, and would want to hit back at the other person, but professionalism discourages this kind of communication. However, by being assertive, we still get the same end but without other unnecessary and unwanted results like conflict.
If you wish to be respected, show respect for others and for yourself first and respect will come naturally to you. Again, role playing as a means of assertivness training can help the student and the adults with this action of aiding the development of self confidence.
Although assertiveness generally is a tool to avoid conflict, it is also very useful in a conflict where between both sides is needed.

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