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An important decision to make post-divorce is whether to keep your name of regain your maiden name.
Some women wish to retain their ex-spouses name for the sake of their children, which is understandable given the confusion it might bring about at school with teachers and other students.
If you are in a profession that relies heavily on your reputation it might be a good idea to keep your name if you want people to recognize your name.
Many women will get divorced and retain their married name simply because they have become comfortable using it for many years. This entry was posted in Divorce Tips and tagged divorce, legal name change, maiden name, name change, reasons to change name, spouse name on June 6, 2013 by Daily Legal Reader. Recently a newly single mom  messaged me: “Can you please write about what to do about your last name after you divorce? I asked for others’ experiences with their surnames following the demise of marriage. Careful with being creative! When Bonnie Russell of San Diego, Calif., divorced, she was compelled to change her name back to her birth name, but when her young children protested, she acquiesced. Prefers married name Adriana Saurini (nee’ Dudasova) did not change her married name back to her birth name to make things easier on her daughter, and for logistical reasons. An exception, Frank says, is when the wife has significant professional collateral with her married name. She warns that keeping a married name can keep you stuck in a romantic relationship that has since ended. Just pop in your name and email and be the first to find out what WealthySingleMommy is up to!
Nothing was more liberating than reclaiming my birth name after the divorce, and my kids didn’t take it personally.
Since a divorced woman is not required to make a name change when her marital status changes, she may choose to keep the same last name she had during her marriage after it ends. For some women, ending their marriage means no longer having tangible reminders of the time they were married to their spouse.
If a woman decides that a name change after divorce is what she wants, there are specific procedures she will have to follow to make it official. In most parts of the United States, a woman can request that the name change from married name to a former one be dealt with in the divorce decree. In some states, the divorce order can be modified after it has been signed to deal with the matter of changing the woman's name after divorce. More than likely, the woman's former husband would not have to be notified of the request, since granting her the right to use a different name doesn't materially affect the terms of the divorce.
The woman may be able to change her name on her identification and records without a court order if she has a birth certificate or passport in her maiden or birth name. If the woman has made a will, signed a living will or made a power of attorney, the name on these documents will likely need to be changed as well.
After divorce, should you ditch your ex's last name in favor of your maiden name or keep your married name, perhaps for the kids' sake?
It's a tricky situation for many and on Wednesday, HuffPost Divorce blogger Jackie Pilossoph gave her thoughts on the issue and explained why it was important for her to make the switch back. Over on Facebook and Twitter, our readers responded to Pilossoph's blog with their thoughts on the name-change conundrum. After a divorce, it is vital for a woman (and also for a man) to make sure all their appropriate documentation is altered to reflect the new status – and in the case of a woman who’s taken her husband’s name and is reverting to her maiden name, it is doubly important after separation. These days, when so many transactions are carried out online and identity theft is rife, your documentation is who you are, and after a divorce you become someone with a different status, whether a man alone, or a woman with a child – you’re no longer a family. It’s important to inform companies and authorities of your new status as a good way to protect your credit rating, since it prevents your former spouse from possibly signing joint credit agreements (i.e.
While that won’t  happen in most cases, it’s better to safeguard yourself against a vengeful former partner rankled by the separation, rather than have your credit rating ruined as you try to build a new life. It also means you can establish a new credit profile if you’re a woman who’s changing her name. If you’re a woman who’s taken her husband’s name, you might well want to revert to your maiden name after an irrevocable split in the family. You can also use your marriage certificate and absolute decree to change your name, but the most common and easiest way is by a Change of Name Deed, and it’s accepted by all authorities. The sooner you accomplish a change in documentation, whether it’s in name or relationship status, the safer you will be. Divorce Online is registered in England and Wales as a trading name of Online Legal Services Limited. Her reply didn’t make any sense to me because, as I said, we were married for such a short time.
A woman who is engaged often consults her husband before deciding to take his name in marriage.
There’s been a lot of talk on this site lately about married women who, after divorcing their spouse, deciding to keep their last names. Or what about if he does have a problem with changing the baby’s name, would you consider something equally embracing as hyphenating said child’s last name? Now what about the women who have children with their boyfriends and give their children the boyfriends’ last names? On top of that, I also believe that people should be careful with the information that they give about each parent to the child. My thought process about this evolved even more when talking to someone who used to be married, but was in an abusive marriage and had a child.

Comment Disclaimer: Comments that contain profane or derogatory language, video links or exceed 200 words will require approval by a moderator before appearing in the comment section. I definitely understand the stigma (perceived or real) of having a child with a different last name than yours– I went through the same thing myself when I got became pregnant before my (soon to be) ex-husband and I married. No slaying necessary, you are truly entitled to your opinion, and I really enjoyed the idea you discussed in your first paragraph.
But to make sure things are straight, this baby maker is out of commission, and will will probably continue to be. When my daughter was born her father and I weren’t even on speaking terms and not once did I ever consider not giving her his last name. My father left my mother with 3 young children and one on the way when I was only 4 years old. Since it is common for women who have children with married men or just out-of-wedlock with men passing through their lives, to give their surname to their children instead of the father’s, how would doing this prevent someone from saying anything about the child’s family situation? Hyphenating a child’s name is likely to raise questions, not quell them, especially if the child is male.
I had the idea of including the question of whether to change the child’s name if you get married, remarried, or is adopted by the stepfather, but that seemed to open up a larger can of worms. Visit the Social Security office in your area to have your name changed on your Social Security card. Bring the new Social Security card or temporary card to the Department of Motor Vehicles.To have your name changed on your driver's license, you will need to bring the Social Security card with your maiden name restored or the temporary card provided along with certified copy of your Final Judgment. With custody disputes, the division of assets, and the stress of finding a new living space you might forget about the process of getting your name changed. One invaluable piece of advice however is to make sure that your divorce decree gives you the option of changing your name back to your maiden name. However, this should simply be a consideration and should not hinder you from changing you name back. If you feel that your community, friends, and co-workers know you by a certain name and you want to keep it that way there is nothing wrong with retaining your married name. There are many factors but really it comes down to how comfortable you in your present situation. I don’t want to share my name with my ex-husband any more, but my two young sons were devastated at the thought that I would have a different name than them.
In the event of divorce, wives who did change their names should revert to their birth names, Frank says. If there are children involved, she may want to avoid confusion that may result if her last name is different from that of her offspring. If a woman feels very strongly that she wants to erase as many reminders of this time as possible, she may want to reassume her maiden name as she builds a new life for herself as a divorced person. Once the formal order has been handed down directing that the woman's name has been restored to her maiden name or her birth name, she will need to get certified copies of the document.
To find out whether this can be done and the correct procedure, the woman should check with her lawyer's office or the court clerk in the county where the divorce was granted. It may be possible to file a motion for the matter to be dealt with very quickly by having the woman indicate what her "new" name will be and having the judge sign the paperwork. She will need to start using the new name consistently and contact different agencies to ask what the procedure is to change her name on the official records. It's a good idea to check with an attorney to find out what is required to keep them in force. It is an option for women who decide they want to have a new name to go with their new marital status. Click through the slides below to see what they had to say, then head to the comments and tell us if you changed your name back after divorce. Although it won’t alter your responsibility on any joint credit agreements that existed prior to the separation or divorce, it can save you a lot of trouble in the future.
That’s important in the long term for you, since credit and your credit report is vital for almost every financial transaction these days, be it obtaining a mortgage or simply getting a credit card. It does bring responsibility though, since you need to inform people of the post-separation name change – everyone from the Passport Office to the DVLA as well as banks and credit card companies, and many will need to see the original deed poll document or a legal copy of it (a photocopy of the certificate will satisfy the others).
If a woman doesn’t want to be married to a guy anymore, why should she be allowed to keep his last name? And I’ve devised some common sense guidelines, I think, on when a woman should relinquish the man’s last name and when she should keep it. After three decades as a newspaper reporter, he’s trying to adapt to the social media world. I was hurt, but still wanted to maintain communication for the sake of the pending birth & other events (birthing classes, babyshower, etc). The plan that he thought he could sleep with a woman unprotected and definitely NOT get her pregnant? Yes, I know that in latin countries, children often take the mother’s surname, but what does that have to do with the price of beans?
I kept my father’s last name my whole life even though I never heard from him again until I was an adult. Change your last name with your bank, credit card companies and all other companies with your information on file. You have a history of your own, a professional identity and public identity that is linked deeply to your name. As time went on and the finalization of the divorce became more clear and real I settled into the idea of having my own life.

To formally change her identification documents, she will need to submit a copy of the order with a form or letter of request.
But having the documentation changed to reflect the new marital status is equally important for men.
You’re free to change your name at any time by Deed Poll (unless you’re doing it for illegal reasons), so the divorce laws have no say in the matter (in fact, divorce laws don’t address the matter in most instances) – although you can’t change the surname of your child without the husband’s permission, if he has the husband’s last name.
When she divorced that time (after a longer marriage), she began using her maiden name again.
He’s matrimonially challenged with two divorces under his belt and is trying to do a better job at raising his 15-year-old son, Connor. He never was a real prescence in her life though she knew him and saw and spoke with him sporadically. He quickly got a new girlfriend & stopped talking to me for the duration of the pregnancy. Whether children were planned or unplanned, we have moral, legal and financial responsibilities to the children we create.
I always knew i would never change my last name with marriage because of what it means to me carrying on my father’s legacy. Some women prefer to keep their former spouse's last name, but if you wish to change your last name, you must follow the proper procedure. It is required that you list the last name you want restored in the Final Judgment and Decree. If they require documentation, mail copies of your Final Judgment and new driver's license.
Each card one held a hand-selected passage of scripture that helped her cope and survive that stage of her life. Plus, duh, you and every other member of Western culture has an excellent chance of divorce.
Plus, “My maiden name is extremely hard to pronounce as I am an immigrant from Slovakia. When the child is of age, though, they could change their name by Deed Poll, as, indeed, anyone can at any time. If she is married and retained her birth name Then the child’s Name Should be hyphenated.
However, my name was not something that linked me to him but helped defined my own identity. Once your divorce case is finalized, the judge will the sign the Final Judgment and Decree, restoring your last name. Now, in this powerful daily devotional, Kristin offers the same inspiring verses that helped transform her heart. My married name is so much simpler and it sounds great with my first name. I am about to remarry. I know I need a clean slate and one that doesn’t remind me of what these last few years felt like.
Nevetheless, cousins grandmother and other aunts and uncles on her father’s side never stopped playing an active role in her life or that of her half siblings he fathered as well.
My man thinks that he should pass his name because of traditions, but traditions mean nothing to me. Two documents in a divorce allow you to request your last name be changed back to your maiden name. She also adds her own compassionate, personal messages of faith and love.Spirituality is one of the most important ways to take care of yourself after a divorce.
He took care of his family and sometimes those who weren’t his family, owned his own business, owned property, had strong values and was a brave man.
No one can make a man do anything he doesn’t want to do, he has to want to do it himself. I think its a very personal and individual eexperience and there is no right or wrong answer.
It’s so important to build emotional and spiritual strength to help you weather the storms ahead.
You’ll be dealing with everything from child custody to alimony to changing your name (back to your maiden name)…you need a strong foundation of God!
My grandfather is not my biological grandfather and he and my grandmother were never able to have children of their own.
But what you said is true about the judgement with a mother having kids with different last names.
In this post, guest author Sydney Tyler Thomas describes the thought process she went through when changing back to her maiden name after her divorce. Why do we have this name and no one else does?” Now, I feel like we are a family in societies view. It felt like I was giving up my identity.ReplyLeave a Reply Cancel replyYour email address will not be published.

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