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After divorce, should you ditch your ex's last name in favor of your maiden name or keep your married name, perhaps for the kids' sake?
It's a tricky situation for many and on Wednesday, HuffPost Divorce blogger Jackie Pilossoph gave her thoughts on the issue and explained why it was important for her to make the switch back.
Over on Facebook and Twitter, our readers responded to Pilossoph's blog with their thoughts on the name-change conundrum. How to Apply for Legal, Social Security Name Change After DivorceDec 19, 2010Get free tips in getting information about the process of name change after divorce. After much polling of other newly married friends, I nodded to tradition and changed my name, sort of.
So, one afternoon with a toddler in tow, I went back to the Social Security office and changed my name a second time. But something gnawed at me, as I signed the paperwork while my son drew on himself with a pen stolen from my purse. I had succumbed to a naming tradition called Coverture which dates back to medieval England, that effectively enslaved women for thousands of years.
Interestingly, a feme sole, a single woman, had legal rights in medieval England, but upon marriage, a woman became a feme covert.
Giving up my name felt akin to giving up a room of my own, something Virginia Woolf had taught me not to do. I was shocked when my lawyer, very early on in the divorce process asked, "What do you want your last name to be?" Of all the things I was dealing with in the divorce, my last name was the last thing on the list. I've contemplated changing my name back to McCarthy, but to return to my maiden name would be a return to my childhood which feels like going backwards.

I've also contemplated choosing a last name as if I was picking out a new dress from the racks at Bloomingdales.
Inevitably, at those dinner parties someone will ask, "Don't you want to have the same last name as your children?" That question always takes my breath away.
Click through the slides below to see what they had to say, then head to the comments and tell us if you changed your name back after divorce. But after college, it worked on a blue-eyed wonder, with a soft smile and a mind full of romantic ideas. I decided to drop Kathleen, a middle name I loved, and replace it with McCarthy, and take his last name, Gibbon.
I was pushing something I wanted down, deep inside, into that place where so many things women want get pushed and left to die. And I did so, despite all the feminist history I studied in college and graduate school (I knew that in several U.S.
A feme covert had no rights to legal property as she was theoretically her husband's property, "covered" by him; made invisible under the eyes of the law. I retained the name Gibbon and laughed for the first time in a long time when the judge told me I wasn't allowed to marry again for 90 days.
I'm happily engaged and even more confused about 'the problem' that has become my last name.
She has to give up, at least part of the time, the most unimaginable thing of all for a mother -- her children.  So what's giving up a name, on top of all that pain? If you are planning to restore your former or birth name, you can request change name from the judge who is handling your divorce case.

I picked Nell Kathleen Gibbon. I let go of my Irish surname and went from under my father's wing to my husband's out-stretched hand. With no immediate plans to marry, do I simply stay a Gibbon? I will admit, I've doodled the name Nell Hall on scraps of paper like a 16 year old girl, but can a woman change her name to her fiance's name without being married? In case your divorce decree includes this order you may want to get certified copies as a proof of the name change. Once you have the copies of the order, you can use it to change your name in other identification and personal records. Make sure that you have to inform the judge that you want to change your name during the divorce.
Once you have the certified copy of the judgment or order, you can now contact the Social Security Administration, your employer, your bank, and others you want to notify about the name change. You have to submit a copy of the court order with other identifications cards with your old name.5. If there are organizations and sectors that will not require you to send the court order, do not do so. Giving them clear information about the name change would be easier for them to adapt the new name. Other people who knows you through your married name will may have difficulty in accepting the name change.

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