Today, I'll be reviewing an Israeli post-apocalyptic action movie from 1994, one of countless such genre movies churned out by Cannon Films and legendary producers Golan and Globus.
Our movie is set in Charleston, South Carolina, a sleepy old port city along the Atlantic coast. The Charleston of American Cyborg: Steel Warrior, however, consists of a single abandoned, run-down tractor factory west of Tel Aviv, Israel. To impose their unique brand of justice, the System created "killer Cyborgs" to enter the cities and "eliminate" anyone who dissented.
While most of the huddled masses in Charleston have given up hope of anything better, a courageous band of rebels is working out of sight to defeat the evil hegemony of the robots and the System and return humanity to its glory days. Ok, I know, I know, American Cyborg: Steel Warrior is a blatant rip-off of The Terminator, T2, Blade Runner, RoboCop, Van Damme's Cyborg, and about a dozen other similar "homages" to the genre. Like how these rebels have somehow managed to create an underground laboratory beneath the ravaged streets of Charleston, fully stocked with salvaged computers and scientific equipment. The lab, how do they hide from the System the massive amounts of electricity needed to run all these computers? All, that is, except for one young woman, most providentially named Mary, who amazingly has live ova inside her. The fetus in the jar, floating contently in there, giving us a creepy smile every now and then. The problem is that the lab in Charleston doesn't have an incubator sophisticated enough to properly gestate the fetus to full term. The other problem, and more pressing to our film's plot, is that Charleston is crawling with Cyborg killers, especially the docks, which are "restricted".
The carnage is swift and bloody, the Cyborg taking much return fire but shaking it off as he's nearly bulletproof. The girls make it to the surface, hotly pursued, and are trapped at a high chainlink fence. The Cyborg is then held up by a group of scavengers who appear out of the shadows to pounce on the still-warm corpse of the girl, looking for loot and maybe even tasty flesh. Mary, meanwhile, has made it to some random abandoned building, where she's not running very fast, and hiding too much, and really can't be surprised that the Cyborg soon catches up to her. They chase and run and hide and shoot and generally test my patience for about five minutes.
Just when it looks like Mary is dead meat, a knife comes whistling in to thump into one of the gangsters! The gangsters down, Austin rifles through the pockets one of them and retrieves some battery packs that he later says were stolen from him. The merchant, proving that just because there has been a nuclear holocaust and killer robots that's no excuse for bad fashion taste. Down in the tunnel, Austin rigs a mine as a booby trap, setting his rifle on top of the mine trigger. As night falls, they go to a safe house of sorts, clearly somewhere Austin has stayed before.
The Cyborg is two seconds from killing Mary when Austin trips him over a ledge (see, I told you). Mary explains her reasoning, though I was more interested in the Burka, which makes her look a bit like Queen Amidala. Mary gives it all up now, admitting she lied about the RZB tabs, owning up to the baby being hers, and begging Austin to help her to the docks anyway. Their latest snack is soon to be poor Mary, captured quite easily when she wandered somewhere she shouldn't have.
Anyway, Austin empties the clip and then tosses the empty pistol at another cannibal before jumping in with fists a-flying. The Head Leech escapes with the backpack (though he doesn't know what's in it), and Austin gives chase. Mary and Austin now share a quiet moment in the church, amidst the bloated bleeding bodies of the slaughtered Leeches, no less. And now we have our movie's "stunning" and "shocking" plot twist: Austin is really a cyborg! As Mary looks for a way around a high fence, the only sign of a "barrier", it starts to rain.
Carp shows Mary a way down to the water's edge, through a short tidal overflow tunnel that leads under a wide pier.
Mary freaks out and runs (well, sloshes through the knee deep water, the actress is really getting a workout in this movie) away screaming bloody murder.
I'm sure many of you by now have heard about Ramon Film Productions, the new film studio from Uganda - a country not normally known for it's movies.
Explosive Action is an action movie review blog focusing on b-grade, direct-to-dvd, made for TV and otherwise unknown gems across the action, horror and sci-fi genres.
They were all over YouTube a few months ago with the trailer for their first movie "Who Killed Captain Alex?". It turns out that if you link all the McBain segments from episodes of The Simnpsons together you get a vaguely coherent plotline that rivals anything PM Entertainment has put out. While this may sound like the title of an Italian Giallo film, it's actually a total B-grade jungle action movie.
They have unleashed the trailers for two new movies: "The Return of Uncle Benon" and "Rescue Team". It's a 1993 Nu Image production that proudly claims to be from the makers of American Ninja. He also directed an ecologically-minded action movie called Indio in 1989, about a half-Indian ex-marine Daniel Morell (Francesco Quinn from Platoon, Hell Ride and a whole lot of TV series) who fights alongside the native population of the Amazon rainforest to hold back an evil corporation's attempt to log the forest. The real thing is, this little Ugandan production house has absolutely no money, no professional actors and could not get permission to use real weapons, helicopters etc. You can mock the bad effects and wooden acting but you can't mock the A-grade effort that has gone into these productions.

They were flogging off all their VHS for cheap and I got a few more beauties for the collection, one of them being this Billy Blanks, Bolo Yeung, Jalal Merhi, Bobbie Phillips and Matthias Hues sci-fi action movie, TC 2000.
I checked all the crew members on IMDB and I couldn't find who the tagline was referring to. For a moment when I saw the cover and Jalal Merhi and Matthias Hue's inclusion I thought TC 2000 was just a localised pseudonym for Talons of the Eagle. The movie begins at a cracking pace; a young black man that for some reason goes by the name "Speedboat" (Larry B. But with neither of those having Bolo Yeung I knew I was getting an action movie I did not already own. Scott) runs a community centre for the local youths and has them breakdancing, doing gymnastics, DJ'ing and other wholesome activities to keep them off the street and away from drugs.
Her boss says it is definitely man made acid then out of nowhere a bunch of friggen ninjas turn up, crossbow her boss in the back, knock off the other workers (including pushing them into the acid-water lake inducing chemical burns) and then a guy in a white suit with a monocle kidnaps her into a helicopter. The story and direction was strong enough to carry the actors, and the action was bountiful enough to keep me entertained with what Marvelous Marvin was doing and not what he was saying. And with this stellar line up how could this be anything but awesome?It's the near future and like any good B-grade sci-fi future, it's a dystopian one.
Soldier waltzes in, freshly suspended from his job as a cop (most likely for not doing things by the book) and after a few seconds talking to Speedboat two of the girls in a dance troupe falls to the ground. Elsewhere, Joe (Ross Kettle) is an ex CIA something-or-other who now lives life teaching women how to breathe in yoga.
The rich live beneath the surface of the planet because of all the pollution that has ruined the atmosphere. Before one passes out and Soldier does come CPR on the other, she says she "took something to give her the edge". He interrupted when an old CIA buddy comes to tell him his wife (Dominique) has been kidnapped by evil-doers in Africa. The poor are exiled to fend for themselves in an Escape from New York way of life on the surface. He doesn't actually want to help Joe so Joe enlists the help of his long time buddy Pete (David Webb; "Come see Africa he says. Moments after he arrives in the Amazon he knocks two armed guys unconscious with his bare hands. We never see any actual evidence of this pollution but we do see the usual gangs dressed as punks and old women wrapped in grey blankets by barrels on fire. Not only that but drugs cut with POISON!From that moment on it's vigilante revenge-time for Soldier and Speedboat (that sounds like a kids morning television cartoon doesn't it?
He meets the local tribe and one of their leaders, Ugadi (Frank Cuervo) who tells him all about the issues they have with the corporation that wants to build a highway through the Amazon.
It represents the percentage of professional critic reviews that are positive for a given film or television show. Billy Blanks plays the awesomely named Jason Storm and lives to protect the rich people as a "tracker"; basically a special security force that keep the riff-raff away from the snotty rich folk.
Soldier and Speedboat: The Crime Fighters!) who take it upon themselves to clean up this town.
His partner is Zoey, played by Bobbie Phillips (who is a very attractive actress whose also been in Back in Action with Blanks, and three TV sci-fi movies called Chameleon).Blanks and Zoey are called to a routine mission to stop some surface scum infiltrating the underworld. Soldier prepares his weapons belt and heads for a known drug sales operation and starts blasting away everybody that stands in his way. One of the early scenes of the tribespeople working chainsaws and tirelessly chopping trees actually made me well up a bit inside, it was moving.
During the recognisance Blanks sees that they have a piece of Tracker hardware that allows them access to the base freely. Anyway, Marvin "frees" the slaves early on in the movie so it's obvious that there will be a retaliation. Then there's a pretty good shoot-out here and Zoey, when looking in the wrong direction, is shot by the rebel leader Niki Picasso (Jalal Merhi, whose having a whale of a time in this role, complete with Che Guevara hat). Just as he finishes laying waste to everybody, Speedboat turns up at the scene ready to kick arse but finds that all arses have been kicked by Soldier. Marvin goes all John Rambo on the mercenary's arses, setting explosive booby-traps and the like. Blanks has a pretty hilarious "you're not gonna die on me now" blub as he holds her in his arms and even pulls out a "Nnnnooooooooo!".After the funeral he runs into his boss and tells him he's quitting being a Tracker now that his partner is dead (who unbeknownst to him, is being resurrected as a cyborg - in a slutty outfit!). The cops are on their way so he splits, leaving Soldier to face up to his actions.After the initial awesome ten minutes of gunfire and bad fashion it starts getting weird again, just like the first movie.
Have a nice trip!".The pair fly to Africa and check into a posh hotel where we briefly meet the owner who is also a co-kidnapper of Dominique.
Fed up with losing his men, van Eyck bombs the crap out of the villagers with nerve gas leaving them with horrible burns.
Soldier is on trial for killing four drug dealers that night and his incompetent comic-relief lawyer wants him to plead insanity. We then move onto a nightclub where we witness what is, without a doubt, the absolute worst musical number in the history of recorded video. That's when Marvin declares that they've lost and needs a good pep talk from Ugadi about leadership.The ending is reminiscent of everything from Avatar to Return of the Jedi, especially the Ewoks hurling stones at the high-tech stormtroopers. Next thing Blanks knows, he wakes up at home and is being attacked by thugs and his place is being trashed. It's agreed that he will undergo psychiatric testing and is remanded to a nut house full of comical types and a cute female psychiatrist. That might be an exaggeration but man, the chick can't sing and her backup dancers are definitely extras from a George Romero movie. That's exactly what we get here with the Indio firing arrows at mercenaries with machine guns, and Marvellous Marvin Hagler performing the Han Solo role of providing modern-age weaponry to assist in fighting back.
They get into a punch up with security and are asked to calm down by the same guy in the white suit and camp accent.

Blanks must now survive on the surface world, and he forms an alliance with Bolo Yeung to get revenge on Picasso for killing his partner. There's a few little fights with Joe kicking Ninjas around and Pete shooting them over the course of the movie and they are mostly hilarious. He learns from Bolo about the weapons plant that will soon drop a bomb on the planet and wipe out all life so that the underworld can reclaim the surface, so he decides to kill two birds with one fist-sized stone.My colleague in bad cinema Ty at Comeuppance Reviews did not think much of this movie.
I will have to politely disagree with my learned friend in this case as I thought that this was a ripping example of bad sci-fi action.
It had everything in it that you need (with the possible exception of boobs); martial arts, firearms, bad sets, worse effects, technobabble, Billy Blanks flat-top, Billy Blanks facial expressions, Bolo Yeung's in-proportionate physique, a smoking hot blonde cyborg in a slutty outfit and a countdown clock that is stopped two seconds before the world is destroyed.
Another strange scene has Soldier sneaking out of the nuthouse via the air conditioning ducts. We do get to meet this guy called Ndumo, a black African man that has some insider-knowledge about what's going on and where Joe's wife is, though he meets a grisly end in a car bomb. After concluding what must be the only successful drug deal in cinema (where everyone gets what they want and no-one dies) she meets Marvelous Marvin and offers him a woman (she's a pimp as well). Sure a lot of the movie doesn't make real sense but as we've discussed many, many times before, if the action quotient is high enough you forget about the inconsistencies in the plot.That's definitely where TC 2000 excels - the action! As he progresses along the duct he runs into a prostitute going in the other direction, off to see one of the other patients. After ditching the girl, he and Ugadi break into the storage room and start loading up their van with munitions. Ultimately it's a case of quality over quantity because when they do come they are either truly explosive or plain hilarious.
It's almost surreal as Joe stands there in the centre of what looks like a basketball court, the bad guy in the white suit surveying from the rafters co-ordinating the performance whilst the ninjas circle Joe on roller-skates with blades in the heel.
Soon after, Mama Lou and a guy that looks like Borat catches them and Ugadi is strung up from a tree while Lou starts beating Marvin with her girth and bites his arm solidly with her golden grills!
One of the funnier ones would be Soldier and Speedboat, pretending to be health inspectors, sneak laxative into another mob kingpin's pasta in a restaurant. Marvin gets her in a headlock while she still has her teeth wrapped around his bicep and starts punching her in the head! It's solid gold entertainment.I've gotten this far and not mentioned the also-tagged Charles Napier, van Eyck's boss. View All Nicole Hansen Trailers Noise Exit American Cyborg: Steel Warrior The Sleeping Car News & Interviews for Nicole Hansen View All Nicole Hansen News Help About Rotten Tomatoes What's the Tomatometer? We see him get his arse handed to him in a sparring match with Blanks early on in the movie and it's revealed that the two aren't on the best of terms. But then Soldier has also planted an explosive in the toilet and blows the fucking bathroom up, kingpin and all. We are told it is so she can help in making more acid for putting into the water supply because that will give white suit guy 'power'. Jobs Advertise Critic Submission API Licensing   JOIN THE NEWSLETTER Get the freshest reviews, news, and more delivered right to your inbox! I guess that's when you are meant to stop laughing but I just laughed louder.Ultimately Soldier and Speedboat get their revenge on the top drug kingpin and we get a proper old-school machine gun shootout at the end, although Speedboat does get captured and tortured for a bit until Soldier rescues him. Man, if there was a better definition for bait-and-switch than Napier in this movie I'd like to hear it. The main bad guy, Joey Garcia (Richard Jutras), is a real piece of work - he slaps a prostitute and then presses a button in the wall that reveals a concealed bed - and really does the "don't worry, they can't get into my impenetrable fortress!" act well when attempting to appease other kingpins he is entertaining.Snake Eater II is stupid fun but it's still not the movie I was expecting, or really wanting, though it is better than its predecessor. He literally flies in, tells van Eyck he's just been fucked by a native and a black man, calls in reinforcements and then fucks out again.
She's not even let out of her motel room or put anywhere near a chemistry set so what is it she is actually doing?
It's like when Krusty the Clown does his lines for the Krusty doll ("Bada bing, bada boom, I'm done. Runtime 91 minutes.Once again I'm too lazy to encode the video to get some screenshots so these are photos I found on Google Images. Oh and be sure to pay attention to the fantastic checker-board wipe transitions between scenes, hah!The Video:Good enough full screen presentation. And then of course there's the big issue of ROLLER SKATING NINJAS IN AFRICA.There's a whole lot of Nostradamus references in Lethal Ninja and I'm not sure why. I was lucky to trip over this in an opportunity shop but eBay appears to have a few copies of the US tape going quite cheap and still new in shrink wrap.
The flick starts with a scrolling text of one of his prophecies, his pictures are all over the town and his name is used as a secret code word over the phone. And because I'm black, mother fuckeeerrrrrrrr!!!!!"The Video:Solid enough fullscreen VHS presentation.
These ninjas aren't particularly terrifying, although they do snap a lot of necks (their trademark, apparently).
IMDB lists the movie as being filmed in scope but either that's incorrect (there is no DVD to check up on) or the centre of frame was always kept in mind when filming, because everything is contained nicely. They do successfully make that 'whoosh' sound found in all good chop-sockey flicks whenever they come into view. I wouldn't really say it was really Africa's forte.Recommended for a laugh and not much more, though that being said you should see it at least once. Quality was really good for a VHS actually, I can't imagine the UK DVD looking any better at all.

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