This page explores the concept of bullying in the workplace and how to respond to it more effectively. The following youtube video is a recording of a webinar broadcast on 17th February 2015 by Alan Sharland, creator of this website and two conflict resolution practitioners from the USA, John Ford and Marlene Schwalje. Prove it!One of the main challenges for someone who feels they are experiencing bullying in the workplace is the apparent need to 'prove it' - to prove that the behaviours they find difficult in another person are 'bullying'. In order to escape that desperate 'road to nowhere' and take a different path with a better chance of getting somewhere that helps to resolve the difficulties, there needs to be a letting go of the concept of 'bullying', whether by the individual affected or the organisational response and ideally by both, and a focus instead on what the behaviours are that the person who feels bullied finds to be difficult. If you are finding this article on bullying in the workplace interesting and useful, Alan has written a book on this topic, available on Kindle.
Is it working? At the start of this article I expressed that what it proposes may not fit with usual expectations and approaches to the concept of 'bullying in the workplace'. 4-word-build, A Conflict Resolution Exercise and Teamwork Exercise May 24, 16 11:17 AM4-word-build - a conflict resolution exercise for gaining a shared understanding of a concept in a group or team. Principles of Effective Interpersonal Communication skills Apr 21, 16 01:48 PMBasic principles of effective interpersonal communication and how to apply them. They learn to get out of their own perspective in order to effectively shift the other persona€?s response.
Bullying caused conflict between two or more students and left unresolved, can result in severe consequences. I know teenagers are challenging during this period of their life when they are changing daily and regularly pushing the boundaries of freedom.
If your child does open up about the conflicts they are experiencing in school, jumping into protective parent mode could make your child hesitant to tell you things in the future. I know irritability and mood swings are typical in teenagers, but if your teen withdraws, or their personality makes an 180° turn, then that is cause for concern. Teens are spending a lot more time on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and other social media platforms.
If they agree, go to the administration and ask what they feel can be done to resolve this issue. Unfortunately, many administrators and teachers in the school system see this behavior as normal and acceptable.
This is where responding to these behaviours immediately becomes far more challenging than it needs to be and is a reason why bullying in the workplace has become an issue without an effective response.
The point being that because of the subjective interpretation of bullying these behaviours will be different for each person. If I call you 'a bully' it conveys nothing about what you have done that leads me to describe you that way.
This page explains The Principles of Effective Communication drawn from the experiences of mediation.


They also discover how to use emotional alignment and language patterns to get a different outcome with people holding other opinions and views. But, parents you need to talk with your kids, even if it’s small talk about the mundane events of their lives. Take notice if your child appears more upset after texting on her phone or using the computer, cyber bullying has become a serious issue in today’s society. But, when adolescents are resorting to harming themselves as a way out, the issue becomes life and death. I may assume you know and that everyone else does, but what I think is being 'a bully' will be different to what many others do. We provide a conflict resolution process that is to understandable, respectful and easily implemented. Those experiences translate into different degrees of communication abilities for addressing confrontations. Most importantly, they learn to more skillfully and professionally resolve issues while preserving relationships and productivity.
Dosomething.org also points out “Only 1 in 10 victims will inform a parent or trusted adult of their abuse”.
Keeping lines of communication open are necessary because if your child feels they cannot disclose information to you then they won’t.
Instead, brainstorm with your teen constructive ways to manage their conflict that does not involve contacting the other parents or administration.
If your teen seems more upset than usual after using these technologies, someone could be harassing him or her.
Parents, I urge you to check in with your teens and make sure they have not fallen victim to bullying behavior. But if I describe what you do that I find difficult it gives more information about the issues involved. Beliefs, triggers, filters, strategies, emotions, context, and other drivers influence how people handle confrontations.
Unlike back in the day, when students were being bullied, they could escape from it when they went home. This is not 'victim blaming' as if the conduct the person is unhappy about is not a breach of workplace requirements there will be no basis for identifying the person as a 'victim' in the first place. Benchmark's expertise in Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) equips us to provide unique strategies so your employees can be more effective. Technology has allowed bullies to enter into the home and continue their harassment of your teen.
Make it easier for others to understand the values and needs that are behind your position.


NLP is the study of verbal and nonverbal language patterns, and how they affect the neurology in a negative, neutral or positive manner. While I am not a parent, I would feel in these situations both helpless and hurt if my child was being bullied and I had no idea. Requesting your teen take some time away from social media could assist them from getting away from their bully.
If they did, there would not be the experience that in a workplace or other context some people see a person as 'a bully'  and that 'bullying' is going on, and others do not.
I have brainstormed below some tips and strategies for parents whose teens may be victims of bullying and what they can do to assist their teen in managing these conflicts. There would be general agreement across all who are connected to the situation that this is so. I don't need to be shouted at and it doesn't really contribute to improving things if you do.
But when I have done group mediations involving allegations of bullying in the workplace by one or more persons there is not general agreement on this when I meet the team members separately, even though some claim there is.
Can you let me know without swearing when you are concerned about something and I'll try to remedy the situation or, ideally, we can discuss together what we can do to sort it out.
Indeed it is often the case that the person accusing someone else of bullying can be seen by team members as aggressive or harassing in their behaviour because of their persistence with their accusations.
Swearing doesn't help me with that so for both of us to move forward can you bear that in mind? You bang the table when we have meetings and I'm worried you are going to become violent.Why do you bang the table?
It can be difficult for team members to say this openly as that is seen as betrayal in something not felt to be directly affecting them, although any such situation usually does. But it is an impartial response to the situation that ultimately supports both the person(s) affected and resolution of the situation itself. Unfortunately the idea that someone who complains of having been bullied could respond more effectively is often interpreted as 'victim blaming' and so, even where they are able to support themselves more effectively this can be stifled and criticised by others as a response. If, as a Mediator or Conflict Coach I explore with people how they have responded to those they consider bullies it is rarely the case that their actions have included anything other than being accusatory.
Indeed, this itself is a response that suggests a sense of being bullied or harassed or intimidated by the person accused and this is often what they express. As a result in many instances of allegations of bullying in the workplace, there can be a sense in the person accused that they have themselves been bullied or harassed or that there have been attempts to intimidate them.
Both participants are able to have a discussion, whether formally or informally and whether directly with each other or separately with a third party such as a mediator or conflict coach, about the different interpretations of the behaviours concerned.



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