First of all, there are several grammar mistakes that should have been fixed during the final proof.
In my opinion, it would be better to start this computer science personal statement from scratch.
If you are looking for a career in Actuarial Science then you will be degree educated with a BSc Hons in Actuarial Science or you could have a Mathematics degree and be very experience in working with statistics to analyse risk.
And when you’re done, check out these interesting 1st grade science worksheets 1st grade science worksheets too! Dattoos, DNA-based tattoos, create seamless connectivity and are the ultimate in personal technology. The basic idea is to use the body as the basis for hardware, and the skin-covered surface of your body as an interface.
To achieve absolute personal identification, the hardware would capture DNA from the user’s body, enabling direct participation in the political and cultural landscape.
Users view, test-drive, and select their product from a variety of options, both functional and aesthetic. More recently, NTT has developed a technology called RedTacton, which can send data over the surface of human skin at speeds of up to 2Mbps -- the equivalent of a fast broadband data connection. In addition, there are many areas with vague meanings, and the applicant could reword them better. More things keep piling up like lumber for a forest fire, and everything culminates with the person’s personal life. You could be beginning your career as a recent graduate or you could be looking for a new challenge or the next step up the career ladder.

The Dattoo is, for now, a concept design by Hartmut Esslinger that uses the skin of the human body itself as hardware and network. As technologists have discovered, interfaces take up space; why not use your most intimate space to connect. They also set the lifecycle of the product, to be utilized for a few hours or a much longer amount of time. I'm the only reporter I know who still uses his handwriter except to take notes…I snapped the fingers of my left hand…Three rows of four colored dots appeared on the heel of my left hand.
IBM pioneered research in the area of using a living person's skin as a computer network in 1996 with a system that could successfully transmit data across skin at low speeds. The transmission is achieved by minutely modulating the electrical body field in the same way that a radio station wave is modulated to carry broadcast data.
What if you could transfer images from your digital camera just by touching a pad on your PC? Another thing that I have picked up on is the fact that the author does not depict the passion about the field itself.
Even as a recent graduate you need to have some previous financial experience in the finance or insurance related industries. Once users are satisfied with their specific configurations, they have this fully-functioning circuitry - including all UI-interactive and display functions - “printed” onto recommended areas of their skin. Manufacturers already "print" RFID tags with a special "ink" that attracts metals in a special solution.
Or move music from your computer to the phone in your left hand - by touching the PC with your right?

It might sound harsh at first, but the fact that the field is briefly mentioned, and the person writing it goes into no detail whatsoever gives the reader no choice but to assume that the writer is simply winging it. All of them contained harmful bacteria that can only be removed with the help of soap and water.
In a more intimate space, the girl you just met could transmit her phone number and other info with a handshake - or a kiss. Another thing that drew my attention while writing this computer science personal statement review is the fact that he brought mathematics into discussion.
I have always enjoyed solving problems and working things out and this is the reason for pursuing my choice of career. At the end of the day, users would simply wash the Dattoos off, beginning anew the following day. I graduated in (when) (what subject) from (what university) with (what grade) and I am very privileged to be working in such an interesting career subject. I am very enthusiastic about my career and keen to continue learning to be successful within Actuarial Science. I have excellent communication skills and feel able to present my information and findings to any number of people in a non technical manner so that the information is interpreted well.

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