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There is a lot of relationship advice out there; friends, family, and coworkers are willing and eager to share their thoughts. I’ve worked with couples who go to bed angry and wake up calmer and with a clearer mind. If there is a problem with your partner’s family, it will not magically go away once rings are exchanged.
If there is something that you feel very strongly about, either behaviorally (smoking, drinking, gambling) or emotionally (fear of dogs, desire for children, religion), do not go into a committed relationship with someone hoping that they will see things differently, change religions, or modify their behavior in any way (see #10).
If you have to convince yourself of this, you’re not only wrong, but why in the world would you want to test it? Last updated: 5 Sep 2013Views expressed are those solely of the writer and have not been reviewed.


Even people who are deeply connected may not realize that you desperately want a party for your 30th birthday, or that you are longing for her to plan a date night, or you expect her to initiate sex. While you might not view your marriage vows as important, the government takes a bit of a different view.
It might be true that no one will ever love you exactly like someone else,  you will be loved again. If you and your partner don’t agree on this, problem solve together to find a solution that works for both of you. Even couples who have to live apart for school or other family obligations for long periods of time find it difficult to regain connection.
Consider this – do you really want to be carrying a secret for the rest of your life?


Forcing Doug to endure round after round of golf does not mean that he will grow closer to Jane; it means he will resent Jane and golf. Asking for what you need does not lessen its importance and does not take away its meaning. Long distance relationships can work, but they’re never ideal and they take a great deal of work and patience. Enjoy your time apart from one another and appreciate your partner for whom they are independent of you.




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