If you have an understanding boss they may be able to help.  However, if your boss is your ex-lover, start looking for employment elsewhere immediately as the likelihood that your work life will be very awkward at best is very high.
Participating in a new activity can be a very effective way to relieve inner tension and move forward with your life.  It will help you redefine and re-establish who you are as a person and may even help you look at things from a different perspective. Seeking out professional counseling and the advice of family and friends can be very helpful in getting over an ex.  Each can help you to remember who you were prior to the relationship and re-establish your sense of self. If I think about the amount of time I’ve spent thinking about exes during my most significant break-ups, I’d dread to know how many days and hours that actually adds up to.
But what I found in my own experience and what I’ve found by coaching people through this stuff is this: you might not be able to stop thinking about your ex, and the pain and heartache might be unbearable BUT there are things you can do WHEN you decide to be ok with the fact that this IS temporary. I’m betting that part of why it feels so unbearable now is because you’re desperate to not feel so terrible. And if you are going to turn to an outlet that isn’t outside in the real world, make it something where you’re learning. From getting over a break-up and healing from heartbreak, to letting go of your ex and dating with renewed confidence, I can provide the tools and perspective shifts to help you take the steps to move forwards. I bring the focus right back to you to heal and progress your life forwards in the healthiest and most fulfilling way possible. I also know that one of the most painful things about break-ups is getting so totally consumed by our ex. And the longer you stay where you are in the same mindset, the longer it will take for that pain to subside.

So the dwelling and obsession is almost like a distraction from admitting to yourself that you feel bad.
But the imagination is an amazing thing and instead of ruminating over your ex (which is also your imagination at work), use it for something positive that’s going to shift you forwards. Motion creates emotion and doing something positive that makes you feel like you’re accomplishing a goal that’s all yours and in no way associated with your ex signifies a new chapter and ignites renewed feelings. There’s nothing wrong with immersing yourself in a book that feeds your imagination in a good way or learning something that inspires you.
And if so, I have a course coming out very soon, which is going to guide you right though your break-up. There’s something about learning that really makes you feel like you’re taking responsibility for yourself instead of being passive, which is what dwelling over your ex and things from the past that you can’t change, essentially is. Make sure to get on my list if you’re interested as it won’t be long until that’s launched! Follow this program from start to finish, and you’ll be back to your old self in no time. Many people I work with totally surprise themselves what they’re capable of when they do this, or the opportunities that start to appear and it’s incredibly empowering for them. It’s a bit like going cold turkey as you might have been stalking looking at their Facebook page as a crutch but be honest, does it ever help you to move forwards doing that? Get new furniture or a few fresh bits and change things around so that when you wake up and when you come home, it represents something different.

For me, it’s setting new challenges, finding ways to work out that I enjoy, being around inspiring, fun people and knowing it’s ok to feel crap instead of fighting it, like I mentioned in the first point.
Visit new places, walk or drive a different way to work, start your day differently and end it differently. Even if you don’t feel like you could see any of them through, it’s amazing what forcing yourself to change perspective can do. Sometimes I try and remind myself that good and bad feelings don’t require me to put such a contrast on them as it then makes the ‘bad’ stuff seem even worse. This helped me so much during my last break-up and it’s something I do when I want to shake things up in my life in general. It can help create that glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel that you’re desperate to see but can’t. Feelings just are what they are and right now, you just need to accept the more uncomfortable ones and trust they will pass. We feel shitty and before we know it we’ve spent 20 minutes scrolling on instagram looking at people we don’t even know, whose pictures aren’t even a true representation of their real lives.
This form of numbing what we’re feeling via digital outlets does nothing for the soul so I am a real strong believer that getting outside in the real world, amongst real people is one of the best ways to move forwards.

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