Think about how many times you say goodbye, get off the phone, or leave for work in the morning with a cursory, “I love you.” What was once a meaningful phrase has now become a habit stripped of its intent. It may be that saying “I love you” to start off a conversation leaves you vulnerable in some way, so the judgment that arise are trying to keep you safe.
The effect I’ve found with people who do this in relationships is that it immediately sets a different and more caring tone for the conversation. You might consider trying this out as an experiment so you can let your experience be your teacher instead of the automatic judgments that arise out of fear. Share this with your partner or close friend, try it out as an experiment, without expectations of any miracles and see what unfolds.

Photo by Sean McGrath, available under a Creative Commons attribution non-commercial license.
Last updated: 30 Nov 2010Views expressed are those solely of the writer and have not been reviewed. Deb: I have benefitted from the guidance you provide in this forum as well as your several publications. So I’m going to propose something to practice that your mind will likely try and dismiss because of some underlying fear or discomfort. What’s so dangerous or uncomfortable about starting a conversation with a phrase which is likely the phrase you would have wished you said more of later on in life when there is greater wisdom from life’s experiences.

If you’re used to having arguments or conflicts and you start the conversation out this way, it creates a different ground for the relationship to be more resilient. Power of protein inKnowing history of diabetes will help you manage10 shocking findings about diabetes in India9 simple tips for happy diabetic feet7 foods that can cause problem in diabetes5 popular diabetes myths busted4 facts you probably didn't know about your bloodVikram Phadnis’ 25th anniv.

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