11 Out-of-Style Trends You Should Phase Out of Your WardrobeDon’t Know Anyone At The Party? A Guy's Post-College Guide To Growing UpAffordable style, how-to's, & self-development for the everyday, 20-something man. In the back of your mind you know that one day she’ll pop the dreaded question: “Would you like to meet my parents?” Meeting your girlfriend’s parents may be a sign of a healthy relationship, but it’s also a nerve-racking event.
Equipping yourself with this knowledge can help you keep the conversation flowing – especially when your girlfriend isn’t around to facilitate.
When you actually meet the parents, it’s wise to practice all of the things your mother used to bug you about: tuck in your shirt, sit up straight, and smile.
One mistake guys sometimes make when meeting the parents is to engage mostly with their girlfriend or through her to her parents.
Find out whether or not they googled you and uncovered any of your previous criminal activities.
Whatever you do, while giving accolades to their daughter…DO NOT SAY SHE TASTES GOOD! I have a question; Is it acceptable for me to wear my Military Dress Blues when meeting my girlfriends parents for the first time? If wearing your dress blues might make her mother anything but happy the first time you meet her, why not play it safe and wear a suit? Covering almost a half of your body, the fit of your shirt is paramount for looking your best. As it turns out, philosophy is a lot more useful when you’re out in the real world rather than in a classroom. There's a line for those who hate their job and odds are, you're already straddling it, next to everyone within eyesight.
Learn how to make friends out of strangers, be more approachable, and expand your social network. Yes, you can get the timeless mid century modern look at the same place you get your underwear. By knowing how to prepare for this important occasion, as well as what you should say and do, you’ll leave their house knowing you impressed them. We spend a decent amount of time preparing for job interviews—looking up facts about the company, learning about the people you might meet and searching for clues about the work environment. Whether it’s Christmas, Thanksgiving or not even a holiday at all, you need to arrive with something for the parents. When bringing anything else, however, consider what your girlfriend told you about her parents.
Whether you ask the parents questions or they ask you, it’s best to put yourself out there.
One thing that comes in handy is bringing up something your girlfriend told you about her parents.
Along with remaining engaged in conversation, another way to make a good impression is to speak clearly.
Megan Wild has seen the good, the bad, and the ugly of relationships and is here to help you impress your girlfriend’s parents.
The Distilled Man features articles and videos about essential skills every man should know. It is important to note that if Chinese girl has invited you to meet her parents – this is a very significant sign meaning that she is serious about your relationship. As for her father, if he is a smoker (which is unfortunately true for most of Chinese men) a block of cigarettes would be a good choice. If there are going to be other members of the family, ask her about Chinese way to address them.
Kissing and hugging your girl in front of her parents is not the best way to prove your feelings since the older generation frowns upon public display of affection and intimacy. If the parents of your girlfriend live in the countryside you might encounter some additional “surprises”. Finally, you might find that the toilet in their house is not the regular flush one you are used to, but the squat toilet.
The most important advice that I can give you: if you have any fears or doubts, talk with your girl in advance and she will help you.
We've all read one of those countless survival guides that teach the basic dos and don'ts of living in China. ECC blogger provides a list of apps that will make everything from eating to cleaning your house easier. More often than not, compliments in China come across more as highly personal statements, ranging from the plain statement of fact to the bewildering to the downright offensive. At the end of the day, none of this matters one iota as all they give a shit about is how much you earn, whether or not you will give them any money to support them, how soon they will get a grandchild and whether or not you are going to whisk their daughter to a foreign country.
Seeing as my wifes father has said that marrying a westerner would never work out, surely turning up will be a good start? Hello, your article was interesting but I have to say, that from what I learned you cannot give knifes as a present in Mainland China, HK and Taiwan. Hey Lauxiia, that's a very helpful page and I must say I'm kicking myself now over that haha!
What are you tips for impressing your boyfriend or girlfriends parents this Thanksgiving 2013? Media That Matters - From the serious to the hilarious, we share stories that rise to the top.
As the relationship progresses, you reach exciting new milestones, like staying overnight for the first time and introducing her to your friends. You have to show them that you’re a responsible adult with good intentions, that you bring value to the relationship, and that you’re worthy of their trust.
Mom’s pestering might have been annoying at the time, but she knew what she was talking about. Whether you’re having dinner at the parents’ house or meeting them at a restaurant, you need step it up beyond a t-shirt and jeans. Especially if you’re meeting at their house, you’ll get bonus points for bringing a small gift. When you meet them for the first time, smile and greet them with eye contact and a firm (but not crushing) handshake. This is the all-important “getting to know you” portion of the festivities, and it’s where the real test begins.


It’s good to show that you care for your girlfriend, so feel free to be affectionate with her in front of them–just don’t overdo it.
Regardless of how well you hold your liquor, limit yourself to one or two drinks in front of the parents.
Fortunately, since I most likely did not make the best impression by sleeping on their sofa the whole afternoon on my first day in their apartment. It really was a great way to break the ice, as he and my dad share a passion for the sport. You got incredibly lucky by having such a sweet and loving girlfriend, and you’re hoping her parents will feel the same way about you as she does. After all, you have a great girlfriend and she’s taking a further step by introducing you to her family.
Talk about yourself—politely—so they can get to know you better, but direct the conversation back to them. For example, if your girlfriend told you her dad owns a software company, you can ask him what his company does. Compliment their house, the food they make and even compliment your girlfriend in front of them.
Hide your nervousness and make sure you come across as confident, even if you feel far from it. Since this is a very important topic, I feel that it would be helpful to post these tips here on the blog. In western countries flowers are always a good idea, but in China it is not a very popular gift (especially for older generation). Beware, however, that your attempt to be original might create troubles: Chinese are superstitious – so make sure that your gift has no negative symbolical meaning (like watch or clock, pronunciation of which in Chinese is similar to “death”). You are a foreigner, stranger (“laowai”) and some curious neighbors might find an excuse to come over, say “Hi” just to have a chance to peep at you. You will have to figure out its usage by yourself and my only tip would be to not lose your sense of humor.
And don’t forget to check out the article about how to leave a good impression on a girl herself. Probably your GF parents did not say anything because they know you shouldn't know but knifes symbolize that you want to cut a relationship. Though I did buy the Swiss army penknives at the advice of my girlfriend who remembered her father had said he wanted us to pick one up the next time we were in the UK, so we ended up buying it then.
Imagine, you are a top uni graduate and some stupid under-educated ??? always tells you that you waste money. This means there will be a ton of eating, black Friday shopping, and spending time with the relatives.
If you are meeting them this Thanksgiving 2013 bringing a nice bottle of wine or their favorite dessert would be most appropriate.
You can almost see them working through a checklist in their minds, grading you against a secret ideal to determine whether you’re worthy of dating their daughter. A general rule of thumb is to dress “business casual.” A button-down shirt and slacks is appropriate for most occasions. Yes, you’re all adults, but don’t call her parents by their first names unless they ask you to. As a general rule, you want to be yourself here, but be your best self–not the foul-mouthed brute you are around your buddies. You may be used to checking Facebook any time there’s a lull in the conversation, but resist the urge. Have more than that, and even if you don’t seem tipsy, they’ll notice your indulgence and disapprove. Her parents do not know I am in the military (Reserves) and my girlfriend thinks this night would be the best time to tell them.
We ended up having a great time, and they were able to casually buy each other beers all night and get to know each other. However, if you show up to dinner in the ripped T-shirt you wear at the gym or your coziest pajama pants, you’re going to run into trouble. You may be able to find common ground if you work in construction, and can discuss the ways that software has impacted your industry or saved on fuel costs. No matter how many times you may show up after first meeting her parents, they’ll always remember you as they first saw you. A firm handshake is perfect for both parents, but if mom wants to give you a hug, by all means give her a good one! I found an article that could be interesting for those who are wondering what to buy and what not to buy! It also might mean you get to meet your boyfriend or girlfriends parents for the first time.
If all goes well with your girlfriend, they’re going to be a part of your life for years to come. Your girlfriend obviously thinks you’re someone she can bring home to her parents, so it’s time to prove her right. Looking at your phone during a social event like this is considered rude, particularly to people from older generations. Even if it’s not entirely true, she’ll let them know, and it will reflect positively on you.
Or you can simply say you enjoyed meeting them, then compliment them on raising such a wonderful young woman. Even though I am in the Army Nurse Corps, her mother seems to think everyone in the military is a cold blooded killer.
At one point my stepmom took me for a walk around the stadium so they could have man-to-man time. If you have some more specific tips you can share for meeting the parents, feel free to add your suggestions. What may work for one set of ultra conservative parents may not work for the parents that attended Woodstock together, which is why I stayed away from specific!
This can be quite nerve wracking and add to the stress that the holidays can sometimes bring. First impressions are important and can be difficult to recover from if you dona€™t give a good one. If you are shy and quiet they wona€™t be able to get to know you as well, and may even think you are stuck up.


If there’s anything you need to know before going into the situation, it’s better to find out early. It’s important for you to come off as a positive person, because no one likes being around a grouch. Her father, on the other hand, will probably love me for it as the two are on the opposite sides of the political spectrum from each other. Never laugh at your drunken Chinese friend who has just fallen over in the bar, thus making him lose face.
Below are some tips on how to impress your boyfriend or girlfrienda€™s parents on Thanksgiving 2013.
Conversing with people from a different age bracket can be challenging, as both parties struggle to find common topics to discuss. I told her it would be safe for me to just wear a nice suit and tie but when I wear my Dress Blues, she melts. That is to say, we are tested on our understanding of Chinese culture to a certain degree every single day. You may want to ask your boyfriend or girlfriend how dressy his or her family dresses, so you have some idea of how you should fit in.
If you’re not on good terms with them, it’s going to affect your life in a lot of significant ways.
I want to make a good impression but I would also like to make my girlfriend happy as well. However, for most expats, the greatest cultural test we'll ever face here occurs when meeting our Chinese partner's parents for the first time. Try to just be yourself and wear something you are comfortable in, as well as something they would be comfortable seeing you in. This article looks at some of the extra things you can do to help convince those hard-to-please parents that you're good enough for their child.
I've been married to a Chinese guy for 4 years and this is the biggest mistake I've ever made.
In my case, my first impression with my girlfriend's parents literally started the very second we emerged from the arrivals gate of the airport, shook hands and I presented them with small gifts. But to really wow the parents, why not bring them something unique from your home country, particularly something that they'd be hard pressed to find in China? While I was shopping around for presents back home, I remembered having read about the Chinese tradition of gift-giving in pairs to reflect balance and harmony, and thought it not a bad idea to score extra-cultural awareness points on top of the actual gift-giving itself.
The father is a bit of a DIY man so you can imagine his joy when he was given a new toy to fiddle with. The mother on the other hand wasn't too sure what to make of the gift, though she appreciated the fact that I'd taken the time to choose something that one of them would like (and she can always re-gift it). Just that tiny amount of consideration alone was enough to help my cause in those crucial early moments. Or what if you're Putonghua is pitch perfect but everyone's speaking some indecipherable local dialect? Even if you haven't got a clue as to what's being said, it's a good idea not to zone out and instead force yourself to make it look as if you're listening and are interested in what people are saying. I experienced this situation for the bulk of a recent trip as, at each meal, I was seated at a table where the airwaves were filled exclusively with Cantonese and Hakka, rendering my trusty Mandarin skills useless. All I could do was try to look interested by leaning forward with my backside on the edge of the chair, coupled with interspersed nodding and a swift turn of the head when someone else started speaking.
I only hope it scored me more brownie points and made me look like I was interested in what was being said. I recently took the chance to employ these new skills of mine via a Skype conversation that she was having with her family. Though not perfect, I think they were surprised, and perhaps a little impressed that I'd put an effort into learning their local dialect.
They'll love that you're willing to go out of your comfort zone for them, and even if you don't care for everything that you try, they'll see it as a huge show of respect.
After you've done your sampling duty for the meal, you'll still want to be sure to strike that tricky balance between appearing polite and not looking too greedy with your preferred dishes. Though it took me ages to pick up the remaining grains of rice from my bowl, I think it was worth it.
Make sure that you're up in a flash and offer to do the dishes, no matter how many times you're flat out refused. Eating is a central part of China's culture and although many of these customs may seem daunting, if you get them right and give off the impression that you're really making an effort, it can do wonders toward impressing the parents.
5) Baijiu bonding Of course, there's always the chance the father will want to have a drink with you, by which point any fears of being judged as an irresponsible alcoholic can be casually tossed aside (see below). My girlfriend's family is pretty conservative on the alcohol front, but I didn't want to turn down the chance for some good old-fashioned male bonding when the situation presented itself.
Switching to Mandarin, we managed to have a pretty in-depth conversation about his past jobs, what I wanted to do in the future, as well as sharing a few anecdotes. For what was mostly a nerve-filled visit for me, this drinking session felt very relaxed and light-hearted, especially after all of my earlier attempts at trying to impress the family. Perhaps this meant that my initiation ceremony was finally over and I'd been accepted into the inner circle.
Or maybe, for all of my early attempts at making a good first impression, all I'd really needed was some quality time sat down having a normal conversation assisted by the wonderful social lubricant that is alcohol. 6) Breaking the stereotype Although many of these suggestions may only be valid for certain situations, the notion of the stereotypical foreigner always seems to linger above our heads. Unfortunately, there are still misconceptions about foreigners in China, and certain events in the recent news haven't done our collective image any favors.
I'm by no means suggesting that all Chinese people hold these views, but there are some nasty buzz words about foreigners that I'm sure we've all heard before: arrogant, loud, promiscuous, booze-guzzling, irresponsible, the list goes on. It's up to us to dispel these generalizations, and where better to start than in front of the parents? Help around the house, carry heavy boxes, help grandpa up the stairs, get up early, make the bed, have a go at cooking some of your homeland's cuisine—it'll all help in promoting your image as a solid, accountable suitor.




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