She will then either reply with something like, “Sorry I missed your call – I was busy. Whatever her response is (it will differ depending on how much your ex is trying to avoid you), just call her. If she didn’t reply to your attempt to call and the follow up text, just try to call her in a couple of days. If you want to get your ex back, you will rarely make any progress by texting back and forth with her. At the time of writing this article, I’ve now helped more than 200 phone coaching clients to get their ex girlfriend (fiance or wife) to meet up with them in person and then talk about giving the relationship another shot.
Prior to talking to me, almost all of my phone coaching clients had been making the mistake of texting the crap out of their ex to the point where she just stopped replying.
As you will discover from the video above, getting your ex back for real is not about having the perfect message to send to your ex.
Getting a woman back involves you being able to make her feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you when she speaks to you on the phone and sees you in person. A message can easily be ignored or misinterpreted, so make sure that you don’t hide behind texts.
Some guys make the mistake of believing that all they have to do is send their ex the right message and she’ll automatically think, “OMG!
I’d love to tell you that there’s a perfect message to send to your ex, which will make her come running back to you, but I would be lying to you. According to many studies conducted in prestigious universities around the world, body language and the tone of a person’s voice makes up almost 90% of communication when talking in person.
If a woman is annoyed with her ex-boyfriend and perceives him to be a needy guy who doesn’t understand how to be the man she needs him to be, how do you think she’ll react to his message? She is most-likely going to look at anything that he sends to her in a negative light, which is why he needs to focus on getting her on a phone call so she can experience his confidence, charisma and charm by listening to the tone of his voice and how he is saying what he is saying. Sending her cute or romantic messages or messages that are intended to make her jealous or remember the good old days, is not going to work. Okay, so let’s assume that a guy wants to send a message to his ex girlfriend (fiance or wife) to tell her how sorry he is and that he wants her back.
Sometimes, a guy will make the mistake of texting something like, “I’ve been missing you so much. However, if he had said that to her on the phone while also getting her laughing and enjoying the call with him (this makes her feel attracted and at ease), she would associate some of her feelings of happiness in that moment with him.
She then phones her best friend and tells her all about how insecure, needy and desperate he is being because he’s resorted to sending her pathetic messages begging her to take him back.
She loses even more respect for him as a man and she feels comfortable moving on with her life without him being in it.
Firstly, the above message might seem like he is showing her how much she means to him, how sorry he is and how desperately he wants to make it up to her, but without seeing his body language and hearing the tone of his voice, all she is seeing is a guy who is trying to make her feel guilty about how bad he’s feeling without her and hoping that she takes pity on him. This doesn’t work because not only don’t women like being manipulated, a deeper reason is that a sexual, romantic relationship between a man and a woman cannot be based on pity. Yes, some women may feel pity and get with a guy for a while because they are kindhearted, but it never lasts and when she realizes that he’s still the “same old guy” she dumped before, she will simply dump him again. Secondly, telling her that he can’t live without her is usually a great reason for her to want to move on.
Then, when you contact her, she will be able to see that you’ve made the effort, and she will feel understood and will be happy to interact with you again. Even if you do manage to send your ex the best message ever written in the history of smartphones, chances are high that she will misinterpret it or not respond to it in the way you were hoping. Without her being able to see your body language and hear the tone of your voice, she will simply assume that you’re only sending her a message because you’re needy and desperate without her, which will turn her off even more.

The ONLY message that you should send to your ex is one where you get her on a PHONE CALL, so you can get her to feel respect and attraction for you on the call and then arrange a meet up.
Sending your ex any other type of message will usually cause her to pull even further away from you. If she’s not, you need to amp up her feelings of attraction by getting her laughing and enjoying talking to you on the phone. She will also feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you and begin to open herself up to the possibility of being in a relationship with you again.
You call her up tomorrow, get her laughing and enjoying talking to you, get her respect back and get her to agree to meet up with you in person. My name is Dan Bacon I am 100% committed to helping men succeed with women and relationships.
I've already helped countless men to get their woman back and I know that I can help you too. If you want me to help you get her back, don't leave my site until you watch this FREE video training on how to get your woman back now. Watch the free training and you will learn how to get her back NOW without having to waste time ignoring her, or waste energy trying to convince her to give you another chance.
It was interesting, because he actually started dating another parent at our school, and our children are friends.
There’s part of me that’s like, “Wow, he’s really broken up over a twenty-year relationship, he has a new girlfriend within a couple months.” It’s not like that doesn’t occur to me, but I had a choice. I asked myself when he started dating this other woman how much time needs to go by in order to get to that place? I had a really cool conversation with a friend whose parents had gotten divorced around when she was the same age that my kids were and we were talking about her experience because I was really, really worried about my kids when we first split up.
The thing I really admired about my mom was that my dad had a new girlfriend really soon and we would go spend the weekend with them when it was dad’s weekend and then he’d bring us back and sometimes the girlfriend would have to bring us back and my mom would just come out to greet us and say ‘hey, welcome home, I’m so glad you’re here.’ I knew my mom could have been bitter, my mom could have been short with the other woman, she could have made it uncomfortable and she didn’t, for our benefit.
One of the things I loved about talking to Michelle is hearing her take responsibility for her part in the marriage and her own behavior. Have you been in a situation with your ex where you consciously decided you wouldn’t get upset? Filed Under: Your Ex Would you like to read these posts from the convenience of your email? If she answers, reattract her on the phone call, arrange a time to meet up in person and get her to feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you in person. You’ve got to make her feel respect and attraction for you on a phone call and in person.
When you send a message to your ex, she cannot see your body language and she cannot hear the tone of your voice, so everything boils down to how she interprets your message.
If she currently doesn’t feel much respect or attraction for you, she is most likely going read the messages through the filter of her current negative perception of you. Before you message your ex, you have to show her that you’re serious about getting her back by changing, improving or fixing the things that caused her to break up with you in the first place. She will play games with you via text, ignore important messages that you send her and misinterpret what you’re trying to get her to understand and feel. When your ex talks to you and she hears in your voice how confident and emotionally secure you now are without her, she will usually be intrigued enough to want to see you in person. She will then become more open to meeting with you in person because she won’t be worried about feeling awkward around you. At the meet up, she will be able to see that you are now a much better man than you were when you and her were together. Send the message I provided at the start of this article and then reattract her on the phone, before getting her to agree to meet up with you in person.

Today, just eighteen months later Michelle is happy for her ex which is quite remarkable considering that by the time she’d gotten to be serious about divorce, communication between her and her husband had reached the point where she truly felt that couples therapy was not option. He moved out in August and by January, he was officially in a relationship with somebody else, where he said, “Yes, it’s official, we’re in a relationship,” to me. I had a lot of friends who were like, “Oh my God, how can you…?” A lot of people want that to be big drama.
I remember thinking to myself when we were in the process of splitting up that I wanted to be like that Bruce Willis and Demi Moore type of a couple later on. Some might say it was too soon but I figured out that I get to choose how much time goes by until we get to that place, and I’m going to choose now.
The other reason was I didn’t want my kids to feel torn or feel guilty or feel that they had conflicting loyalties if they were spending time with him and my daughter’s friend’s mom. She just welcomed us home and said how much she missed us and had a plate of cookies ready.
That’s what I want to be like for my kids, too.” So when he started dating, that was a choice I made, and I think that’s really what healed our relationship because he is happy, and he deserves to be happy. Notice the way she doesn’t say that her ex changed his behavior after they separated, she says it was she that was able to see him from a different perspective. Join my mailing list and receive a free copy of the ebook Untangling From Your Spouse: How To Prepare For Divorce. Of course if it was me that did that I would lose it all, but because the system is so against men she get sit all when it was here that left the marriage. She might get the message when she is feeling happy without her boyfriend and when she reads it, she will feel as though she doesn’t need him to feel happy.
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It ultimately was my decision, me more than him saying “No, I can’t do it.” He was bitter, his pride was hurt, his feelings were hurt, so it was pretty tense for a while. They’d been spending time together for a couple of months before he told me and what was cool about that was that it made him happier and it made him a lot easier to deal with. Well, I had noticed a change in his behavior towards me instantly, I didn’t want him back, so all I could do was just say, “I’m really happy for you.” And I was happy for him, and I recognized it actually made my life easier to just let it be and not make a stink over it. I knew that my goal was that we could do things still as a family, have friendships still as a family and just not be a couple. It reminds me of Lorraine who had to choose between being a woman with class and dignity or a screaming bitch and Kay who didn’t want to be seen as a victim. I do think there is a danger that if you choose to be mad with him all the time, that negativity will seep into the other areas of your life and bring you down whereas choosing to be at least neutral will help to lessen that. Now you think I’m going to come back and experience the same old crap with you just because you said you’re sorry?
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Once we stopped trying to be a couple, once I wasn’t expecting him to be what I wanted him to be as a husband, it took a little time, but I started to appreciate him just as a man. He was feeling better about himself, so all of his animosity or whatever…it seemed to really help him.
He’s a good father, he’s been really involved and responsible with the kids, he’s helpful, he’s supportive. I was able to feel a lot of good qualities in him that I was totally blinded to when I was so unhappy in the marriage part of our relationship.

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