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Deciding to get married is one of the most important decisions you will ever make in your life, but when made correctly it is also one of the best.
Each of the following sections highlights a different question that you should ask yourself before deciding to propose marriage. Marriage very rarely makes bad things better, so the quality of your relationship before proposing is very important.
A wedding proposal and marriage should be an exclamation point on an already thriving relationship. Once you and your partner are able to handle money as a team, then you will be able to build a wedding budget together. Which relationship is more mature … One where the couple has been together for two years, but only in a long distance relationship scenario, seeing each other once every three months?
I do feel, however, that a marriage proposal in a relationship which started less than six months ago should be approached very cautiously.
Take the time leading up to your proposal to really get to know your partner, and be brave enough to share your true self with her. You should also explore key areas of compatibility that are important for a successful marriage.
If during your exploration of the similarities in ideals between you and your partner you do find an area that presents a conflict, work to improve it and come to an understanding together. If an issue arises that you can not improve and move forward from, it may mean the end of the relationship. After considering all of the above, you should have a strong feeling about whether you are ready for marriage.
Read the Guys Guide to Proposing Marriage eBook for more information about planning a marriage proposal.
Get a FREE Sample ChapterEnter your name and email below to get Free Instant Access to a chapter of the best guide available on How to Plan the Proposal of Her Dreams. Except where otherwise noted, all content by Guys Guide to Proposing Marriage is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License. Confessions about Feedism submitted by Feedists.Currently only accepting confessions via the "submit" feature.
My problem is that, after cutting all contact with her for two months, I have recently started having sex with her again. In a moment of weakness where I brought up the possibility of a relationship again, she made it quite clear she does not want to be with me, beyond friends with benefits. Simply, the alternative of reinventing your life is a lot less appealing than keeping up your unpleasant status quo. My concern is that she will find someone before I do, and thus I will be alone and devastated, feeling used as a filler.
Should I just suck it up and enjoy what I have while it lasts, or actively avoid her if I run into her? This would explain why we stay in dead-end jobs and dysfunctional relationships way past their expiration dates.
Not only will she survive just fine without you, but you’ll have a chance to thrive on your own.

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My ex-girlfriend and I hooked up post-breakup, and stayed together as lovers for almost a year. Friends with benefits is great conceptually; but once someone develops feelings, it all falls apart.
Many of us have tried this with former lovers and unfortunately it seldom, if ever, works for very long. Just stay with the FWB, it is a well known fact, women think they can handle it, but, it won’t last. Once you start getting more serious with another girl your ex will most likely start saying she wants to be with you again… this is just her competitive juices flowing.
I recommend you keep dating and find a girl who really appreciates you and wants to be with you on your terms.
Although there are always those few exceptions to the rule, but FWB do not work for both people. The danger of course is always one person going on to a real relationship first and the other one feeling a bit annoyed (not always hurt, but sometimes). Then go on to be open to a new relationship, instead of dragging the previous one out in a wussy FWB thing with someone you KNOW you need to let go of.
I mean we’re assuming the FWB is on the same page here, and one can avoid the kind of emotional entanglement that Evan mentions. Learning how to recover from a breakup and re-entering the dating pool is a valuable skill. This post is simply meant to offer my personal perspective on what I feel you should be asking yourself when you are considering marriage. You’re actually in great company, and the fact that you have these hesitations is a great indicator that you respect your girlfriend and the importance of marriage. If all aspects of your current relationship are not the ones you want for the rest of your life, work on improving it together with your partner in relationship counseling before deciding to marry and propose. I pulled the trigger but I think that if I hadn’t she would have within a month, we were fighting so much. And what you’ve now discovered, at 21, is that, often having something flawed is better than having nothing.
She is using you for shag now and then, and you are using her for your social status, and a shag.
There is always one who is going to get hurt before it is through, and you are not only delaying the pain, but also building it. Sometimes men and woman have used their FWB relationships to keep things from going too fast too soon with people that they were dating that they really wanted a relationship with. Without awkward human emotion screwing up the picture, all kinds of things become possible.
You must always make your own decisions and seek additional counsel when you feel it is necessary.

If you consider the points made in this article, you’re making a great first step toward the alter. The important thing is that you think about these things and justify that each works for your unique situation. We are both young (20-21) and in college, and were both each others’ first real relationship. A few weeks after she broke up with me, she came back to figure out how to make things work. A jagged, break with shards is usually more complicated to fix, and takes longer to heal and rehabilitate. I’m ready to move on and find a partner to be with when my children head off to college (in the next few years). After all, we had so much worth preserving; it would be a shame to let our chemistry just fizzle out like that.
I can’t think of a stronger endorsement as to why you should cut this woman out of your life. Think about all the reasons you resent your ex and use them as a justification to cut her off cold-turkey. Think about it – how many people are in one romantic relationship for their entire lives? There is no perfect age that allows you to be ready for marriage, but getting married too young does sometimes present additional difficulties.
But as much as I was dazzled by her and wanted her back, I knew one thing for sure: she was the exact same person who dumped me three weeks before. I an definitely an introvert, I am involved in many things and I mingle with many people, but I don’t cultivate many friendships.
Marriage will not prevent you from doing these things, but it will present additional considerations as you progress through your young life. This is all my own failing, because she has made clear to me EXACTLY what she wants, with no pretense. In short, a break-up leaves a tremendous void that doesn’t just get magically filled.
I can count on one hand my closest friends, and I would have extra fingers LOL, and even then, I still reevaluate my relationship with those people I call friends.
That fear and loneliness was bringing us back together, and would have been the easiest thing to give into. This article will help you understand if marriage is the right next step so that you can be confident in your decision to propose marriage. I’ve just never met anyone I would enjoy to hand out with that way, and when I do, which is rare, they never make it a priority to hang out with me.

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