Before delving into assertiveness training exercises, it is necessary to shed light on what assertiveness is.
To be assertive or to become more assertive, you need to invest some time and effort in assertiveness training exercises. Within the ambit of this article, you can get accustomed with certain effective ways to work on your assertiveness.
Confidence is inspired by the clarity of one’s purpose and resilience to keep giving his best. Negative Thoughts to see how these can be beneficial.) It's also not the same thing as being aggresive.
This is one of the most difficult things to do, especially if you are a shy person or a people pleaser. It can be easy to think that our friends, family, and co-workers should know what we want and need. For most people, "Putting your own needs first" can sound like a selfish belief that should not be ascribed to. Most people who experience stress on a regular basis tend to be perfectionistic in their expectations for goal outcomes.
If you describe yourself as a "people pleaser", "agreeable", or "non-confrontational", you may be quite stress-prone because you try so hard to remain agreeable and not "rock the boat". Slideshare uses cookies to improve functionality and performance, and to provide you with relevant advertising. Clipping is a handy way to collect and organize the most important slides from a presentation.
If you're going to make the effort to learn assertiveness training, let's make sure it really works for you, and doesn't lead to disappointment. You've been having some trouble with communication, or you wouldn't be reading about this subject.
The inside part is where you make sure you have access to all of your personal energy and power, so that when you get to the outside part--the assertiveness--it is just what you hoped it would be. As we start, just consider that you are far more powerful within yourself than you have ever imagined. The clarity, focus and confidence you need in order to be assertive on a consistent basis depends entirely on your level of emotional intelligence. Self management--inner child work is a good place to start here, then move on to practicing relaxation. Social awareness--be sure and learn about nonverbal communication and basic emotional needs, as you begin to develop a positive view of other people. Relationship management--this is a very large subject, so we will just focus on the assertiveness training aspect here. The first three components lay the groundwork for the fourth, which is where assertiveness training comes in. Assertiveness without self awareness, self control and social awareness will either be ineffective or counter-productive. Assuming you've done some work in the first three areas of improving your emotional intelligence, it's time to begin learning about assertiveness. When you're being assertive, you're mainly using "I" statements, talking about where you stand, what you want, and what you will and won't do.
If you have too much anger, you won't have the emotional control to be assertive in a healthy manner. If your anger is deeply buried and suppressed, you will be too passive in your efforts to assert yourself. When your anger is healthy, it is not a problem for you, and you will not seek conflict or feel a need to avoid it. Healthy anger comes straight out of the self love, and the need to love and be loved, which is the same positive origin of assertiveness.

Make sure your anger is healthy, by listening to the free previews below of Healthy Anger And Your Health, a live recording of a presentation I made to help explain this important topic. HEALTHY ANGER AND YOUR HEALTH: Using Healthy Emotions to Heal Your Body reg. My 20 Year Old Son Has A Son He Does Not See Apr 29, 16 10:37 AM I am a single mother of a 20 year old son who has been abusing me since he was 14. Help Me Please I'm In Such Turmoil Apr 26, 16 05:34 PM Hi, I'm so glad I've found this site, please can you help me. Anger Addiction And What Can You Do About It Apr 17, 16 04:59 PMLearn how anger addiction can destroy your relationships and your health. You should be assertive at your workplace, home or even when you are in a social gathering. There are professional courses and even workshops that train professionals and aspirants to become desirable assertive.
First, you will have to work on your communication and ensure that you always speak with an open mind.
The aforementioned examples may appear to be quite simple or they may be difficult for you to come up with. But, unless you look after your own well-being (including your own stress relief) first, you will not be at your best for friends, family or work. Stress comes easily if you're worried that the job interview will be a failure or that the party will have snags. To make sure you get what you're looking for, we're going to approach this topic from the inside out. This assertiveness training information will give you the knowledge and skills you need to make this a part of your everyday life. This step also includes a lot of work on developing healthy anger, which will serve you well in all that you do in life. You're not talking about the other person, which runs the risk of becoming intrusive and aggressive. This usually means you'll have trouble being assertive, because assertiveness often means not giving the other person what they want.
Assertiveness training is not quick or easy, but it's well worth the investment of your time and energy.
Period covered by business psychologists and solutions explore the day assertiveness practical. To do this, you should practice saying yes and you should also practice saying no without having a negative impact.
Before you can work on such real life instances, you would have to develop your psyche or your thought process. That means being respectful of your time, priorities, beliefs, and values through your thoughts and actions.
Job interviews are nerve-wracking by nature and something always goes a little awry with a party. When you brush your own needs aside to avoid an awkward or upsetting situation, it can lead to your harboring resentment.
As a part of your assertiveness training, I highly recommend that you learn conflict resolution skills.
Putting your own needs first simply means that everyone you interact with gets a happier, healthier you when you show up--because you took care of yourself before you got there.
When this powerful emotion is healthy, it operates hand-in-hand with love, intelligence and kindness Imagine having all of that emotional energy in anger available to you to do the good things you really want to do, like be healthy and happy and create wonderful relationships.
In regards to behavioral skills or personality, assertiveness is a style of communication in which you are capable of expressing everything in a very open manner which doesn’t offend anyone and certainly doesn’t wrong anyone. You may also refer to the wide range of literature available today, authored by corporate honchos, public speakers and psychologists.

You must remember that assertiveness is a personality trait which has behavioral implications but it is first a psychological reality. Stress can pile on quickly when you try to keep everyone happy and squeeze as much as possible into your schedule. If you are used to saying "Yes" to everyone and agree to do things you really don't want to do, you'll end up feeling burnt out and resentful. The question then is, "What are my needs?" Setting priorities is essential and assertiveness training is key. In other words, your communication should be confident, there should be a degree of authority and it should be harmless, a manner that doesn’t violate any rights of anyone present or not present. You may also watch videos which are more like tutorials where you can learn some assertiveness training exercises. You may have someone propose an idea which you don’t wish to accept or you don’t want to consider.
Unless you are assertive in your mind, you cannot develop assertiveness in your personality.
Even if asking doesn't get you what you're looking for, you'll feel better for asking anyway. It may not always help you achieve everything you want but it will certainly make life and the world around you easier to manage. Even if you don’t like the idea, you can always say that you would think about the idea and that you will need some time to get back on the same. With this approach, you are not rejecting the idea, you are not accepting it and you are not making any promises either.
Whenever you are faced with a situation when you have to impose your word or authority, you should think of the ways that you can communicate that will appear to be rational and acceptable without actually being thrust down upon everyone.
If one avenue says "No", you'll be more likely to try another because of the confidence boost.
You can then discard or consider the idea and get back to the person with your simple or detailed response, as the norm may be in your company.
It may have been a complicated task and you may have done it to the best of your ability but it doesn’t meet the requisite standards or expectations of your seniors. If you are requested or asked by someone at work to stay late and get some work done when you have a prior commitment, then how do you express assertively. If you ask your supervisor for a promotion but no positions are available, at least your boss is now aware that growth is something you're interested in. Instead, you should say that you could have stayed late and done the task but you have a commitment that you absolutely cannot postpone or cancel.
This is a professional way of saying no, without diluting the importance of the task and without rejecting the authority of the person making the request and at the same time you are being decisive and definitive enough to state that you would not be doing it, without offending the person. Take on the criticism, endorse or acknowledge whatever part of the criticism you agree with and ask for some more light on the aspects that you don’t agree with.
Be assertive by asking your seniors how you could have improved on the facets being talked about. Maintain a professional tone and be welcoming of ideas, even if you don’t agree with everything being said and criticized.
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