It is estimated that just 8 percent of American women will keep their last names after marriage. While the decision to change your last name after marriage is a personal choice that every woman (and man) must make, there are societal pressures that may influence couples one way or another.
More than 60 percent of people polled agreed that women should take their husbands' last names after marriage, while less than half said a man should be allowed to take his wife's last name. Click through the slideshow to see how the results broke down based on sex, race and political affiliation. Of all respondents surveyed, 61 percent said a woman should take her husband's last name after marriage. The Wedding blogs have a lot of informative wedding related ideas and effective planning tools. While using the free wedding planning apps for iPhone and iPad to plan your wedding, the topic of changing a last name may come up. Understanding the history behind the name change and some of the reasons the modern woman rejects the idea is imperative for the groom. Women were not allowed to own property and in most patriarchal societies the lineage and succession was passed down based on paternity. When survival depended on brawn, women needed the man to provide food, clothing and shelter. Today the decision to take the husbands name is made all the more agonizing by a woman’s peers. We may not have given you the answer to your dilemma, that was not our mission, helping you to understand why it is an issue and where it started was. After I got engaged, the name issue quickly became the most frustrating detail for me to figure out. I genuinely believe that any partner should change their name if they so desire, but I couldn't seem to justify it to myself for some reason.


When I chose my new first name, I partly chose it because it is gender-neutral leaning toward masculine, which suits my genderqueer self far better than my given name ever did. While my reasons for disliking my first name are many and varied, it's never been about my family - who I love dearly. Please know that I am in no way trying to invalidate anyone else's experiences of feeling trapped. Did I want to keep having the same tiresome, negative conversation with every new person that I meet? Additionally, I now have no problem taking my partner's (delightful) last name when I will also be taking my own first name, on my own terms. Then, take part in our reader polls below to add your thoughts to the debate and compare your answers to our national poll. You can learn more about this project and take part in YouGov's nationally representative opinion polling. To keep or change ones last name is a purely personal choice but it is something that should be discussed with the groom before the wedding.
Customs are habits; traditions are used to bestow significance and are performed for a reason.
Now that you're officially husband and wife, if you have decided to take your hubby's name, it's time to get your new last name legally recognized by the government. Though, I decided to keep my middle name for sentimental reasons - bracketing it between my chosen names. The poll used a sample selected from YouGov's opt-in online panel to match the demographics and other characteristics of the adult U.S.
In fact the tradition of a woman assuming the last name of her husband is only about 1000 years old. Although we have become much more enlightened, some cultures still consider a wife as the property of the husband.


They either remained with their parents or took jobs as servants, school teachers, and governesses or for those who could not find such estimable posts, whores. Are you that insecure, having to assert your independence with every stroke of the pen when you sign your name?" The wedding brides friends can be even worse with snide remarks aimed at undermining your strength and sense of self.
I had already earned two degrees and published a few academic papers under my current name which was a significant amount of identity investment, as I saw it.
My father is Hawaiian, and I was given the name to honor that heritage, though I was not raised in Hawaii. Then I started my first full-time job, and was overwhelmed with my legal name on everything, including my provided work e-mail address. While you are searching for bridal dresses and the wedding tuxedo, bring up the discussion casually and feel the other party out about this subject.
The advent of the legal profession and wills and so forth as made this reason a moot point.
Women who weren’t considered beautiful had it harder still and if a women were unfortunate enough to have a child out of wedlock her options dwindle to almost nothing.
I reluctantly ordered business cards thinking "Well, maybe I can go by this name again." But, in fact, I couldn't - I hated it. Factors considered include age, race, gender, education, employment, income, marital status, number of children, voter registration, time and location of Internet access, interest in politics, religion and church attendance. With social programs that help women with children and education women today do not need the protection of a man for survival. His name was certainly not improved by tacking my name to the front of it, but I felt kind of wrong just changing my last name - misplaced feminist pride, perhaps.



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